Appledashery

by Just Essay

Shop 'Til You Dash

"Gilda, can I ask you something?" Rainbow remarked.

"No," grunted the griffon, shuffling down a series of metal shelves lined with tightly wrapped edible products. The lights of a decrepit grocery store flickered overhead.

Sighing, Rainbow spoke anyways: "Is there anything your kind eats besides crackers and raw meat?"

"Well, there's another kind of thing we like to eat every now and then," Gilda said. She bore a slight smirk as she shuffled down the line. "You should know. I ate it all the time."

Rainbow facehoofed. "Must you? Really?"

"Hey..." Gilda shrugged, feathers ruffling. "You came to my roost, dweebo."

"And could you drop the 'dweeb' crud? It's getting super old super quick."

"Suck it up," Gilda grunted. "Just because I'm lending a talon doesn't mean we're friends again."

"I didn't say that—"

"What you said was that 'this doesn't concern us.' Well, I couldn't agree more." Gilda shrugged and glared over her shoulder with a single hawkeye. "I'm just doing this to get you out of my feathers, alright?"

"And crackers are somehow going to get me on Fibb's good side?"

"Pffft... who said anything about you?" Gilda flapped her wings, hovering so that she could reach the highest shelf in the aisle. "And, to answer your question, it all depends on the kind of crackers." She grabbed a large container.

"That's... uhm..." Rainbow pointed. "Some shiny red packaging."

"Goooooood, pony!" Gilda cooed, her smile bright and voice patronizing. "Nice to know your eyes work way the Hell better than your legs!"

"Hey, don't you start—"

"Yeesh, what ever happened to your backbone, Dash?" Gilda walked towards the front counter on the opposite end of the store. "Did you trade it in for the stick up your plot?"

"Gilda—"

"Cuz I'd ask for a refund, if I were you. It's a lame substitute."

"Must you make this so painful?!" Rainbow hissed, struggling to catch up with the birdcat. "I asked for help getting the Wind Chalice from Fibb! Not to be crucified!"

"Beggars can't be choosers, soft-hooves," Gilda grumbled. "If you don't like it, you can go ask for help from another jilted griffon lover holed up in a big crystal tree." Th-Thud! She dropped the package onto the front counter. "Hi there!" she said in an uncharacteristically melodic tone. "I'd like to buy your store's most expensive saltine delicacy, please!"

"Mmmmmm..." A dull-eyed clerk looked up from a magazine. "Who's payin'?" she groaned lethargically.

"My very good pony friend here!" Griffon pointed over her shoulder with a smile. "Every bit of it!"

Rainbow's ears twitched. "Buh? Gilda, I—"

"Ah jeez, hoofy-poo..." Gilda turned towards her, pouting with puppy dog hawkeyes. "That isn't a problem, is it?"

The clerk looked over. "Well?" She clicked her beak. "What'll it be, 'hoofy-poo?'"

"... ... ..." Rainbow frowned. "Hrmmmf..." She reached into her saddlebag, rummaged around, and produced a hoof-full of bits. "Not like I was gonna be bartering with the dragons anyways."

"Heheheheheh—wait..." Gilda blinked, still chuckling. "Dragons?"

"Here ya go." Rainbow dropped the bits onto the counter. "And before you try and bite them—"

Crkkkk! The clerk was already scissoring her beak over the first shiny coin she got her talons on, testing its metal.

Rainbow sighed long and hard. "...they've been rattling around for twenty-four sweaty hours, if you catch my drift."

"... ... ..." The clerk glanced at the bits, then at the pony. "Ptooie!" She spat it onto the golden pile and slid the package of expensive crackers towards Rainbow. "The money's good. Enjoy your saltines."

"Jee, thanks." Rainbow grabbed the box and slid it into her saddlebag.

"Heh..." The clerk smirked. "You figured I'd be testing the metal. You certainly know your way around griffons, soft-hooves."

"Girl, you don't even know," Rainbow sighed, shuffling the weight of her saddlebag.

"Wait just a minute, Dash," Gilda said, tapping the mare's shoulder. "What's this you're going on about... dragons?"

"Doesn't matter." Rainbow shrugged her talon off and made for the door. "Let's just get this crud with Fibb over with. I'm kind in a hurry here, in case you couldn't tell."

"Uh... right. Of c-course."

FWOOOSH! Rainbow flew out the store's entrance, ascending towards the upper boughs of the crystalline spire.

Gilda fidgeted where she stood. Her eyes squinted into the nothingness straight ahead of her while her break clenched and unclenched.

"Hey... uhm..."

Gilda looked over at the clerk.

The griffon behind the counter gestured. "It's buy two get one free, in case your marefriend gets hungry again."

"Go lay an egg," Gilda grumbled, flying out the door. "She's not my marefriend. Never friggin' was either..." FWOOSH!

"Hmmmf..." The clerk returned to her magazine, leaving a sly grin plastered on the distant doorway. "...and I'm an albatross' auntie..."

Comments

[Chewierulz]

Damn, you're a machine today! We're so spoiled.

Seems Gilda does still care, underneath that rocky exterior. I can't help but wonder if she'll be following Dash for a while.

[RoboRed]

"Well, there's another kind of thing we like to eat every now and then," Gilda said. She bore a slight smirk as she shuffled down the line. "You should know. I ate it all the time."

Rainbow facehoofed. "Must you? Really?"

lololololinnuendo

[Lightning Bearer]

If anyone needs me, I'll be purging the idea of beak cunnilingus out of my brain.

[Sheendough]

6203155 You just had to say it, didn't you?

[viofriedsevey]

6203155
I really tried to find a photo that could properly portray my reaction to this, but I couldn't. So instead, just imaging someone cringing so hard that they drop their phone. By the way, for some reason it's far worse having the mental image be Dash, as opposed to pretty much anyone else. Not sure why.

[MidnightReflection]

Wait just a minute, Dash," Gilda said, tapping the mare's shoulder. "What's this you're going on about... dragons?"

Well you see Gilda, there are 5 of them, and they're known as Divines...

[Leftover of Saikano]

Dragons. That changes everything.

[zaponator]

Huh, Gilda isn't a sociopath after all. It'd be neat if she actually came with Dash on this adventure. Could always use a traveling companion to mix things up.

6203128
i.imgur.com/7nGzZOm.gif

[Skunkiss]

6203815
6203041

Calling it now, Gilda will play a big part in this whole arc, not just until they get beyond the wind-wall.
There definitely are a lot of things she should talk to Dash about.

Obviously Dash never took the relationship as serious as Gilda...
...
oh gods...
if Gilda STILL has these kind of feelings for Dash... ... ...

could this story really get any better?

(or maybe this is all just wishful thinking, who knows)

[Sileadh]

I. MADE. IT. I've finally reached the end of this monster, phew...wait it isn't finished, is it? No it isn't. Whelp, that's the rest of my life sorted when it comes to reading. Awesome.

You can have all of my thanks. No seriously, I've gotta barrel of them around here somewhere...

[Skunkiss]

6205285

wait it isn't finished, is it?

And it never will be...
one chapter a day, for the rest of eternity!

[Hestia]

6205485 Haha, yeah I know there's a series. I was actually watching it a few minutes before I commented. Guess I got it on the brain.

[Fishberry]

"Well, there's another kind of thing we like to eat every now and then," Gilda said.  She bore a slight smirk as she shuffled down the line.  "You should know.  I ate it all the time."

Ah, there's the elephant in the room.

[TwilightUCrazy]

I was right, wasn't I? Rainbow will use her last wish to save Apple Bloom, languishing uselessly on the ground and paralyzed.

Gilda will then swoop in for the rescue.

[LucyHorseThing]

"Well, there's another kind of thing we like to eat every now and then," Gilda said. She bore a slight smirk as she shuffled down the line. "You should know. I ate it all the time."

Did she just-?

Rainbow facehoofed. "Must you? Really?"

She did.
orig06.deviantart.net/abf3/f/2013/099/1/1/rainbow_dash_getting_angry__s2_e8___svg_vector__by_leontheoriginal-d5ievqx.png
By the way:
memecrunch.com/meme/NKH1/she-knows-gasp-cat/image.jpg

[Revan]

Got this far yesterday. Still hanging on to my principles without hating the story.

[arancaytar]

Don't tell me Gilda is joining the party.

The Ignoble Jury.

[bronyheat]

Not to be crucified

This raises a few questions...

My new headcannon is ancient dragons practiced crucifixtion and that Crackle the Dragon died for our sins.