Appledashery

by Just Essay

At the Mouth of a Cave In

"Grrrr... grnnghhh...!" Rainbow Dash snarled through her teeth as she clenched her jaws over the end of a rope. With jerking movements, she struggled to pull the corner of a careening tent until it was taut.

Behind her, the mares chattered as they laid things out for an overnight stay at the mouth of the cave.

"So, Fluttershy, darling." Rarity's voice unraveled in a playfully melodic fashion. "I hear that an apple a day keeps the doctor away."

"Yeah! Hehe!" Pinkie Pie zipped back and forth between the wagon and the cave, setting up supplies. "Now that she's getting regular checkups!"

Flutterhy giggled, blushing slightly as she rolled out the canvas material of a tent. "Oh girls. Please. It's nothing like that."

"Nothing like what?" Rarity sing-songed.

"Mmmmm... whatever it is that you may be implying."

"I'm implying nothing, darling!" Rarity breathed. "I have every reason to believe that you are a perfect and refined lady."

"Thank you, Rarity."

"Yeah!" Pinkie Pie hummed. "Perfect for Big Macintosh!"

She and Rarity giggled.

"Ohhhhhhhh..." Fluttershy rolled her eyes. "I knew I would be having to deal with this sooner than later, but not on this trip! Or from you, girls!"

"Oh Fluttershy, dear, don't take it so personally." Rarity trotted over to nuzzle her. "We're all so very happy for you. I think it's quite... yes... quite charming that you are the first and only member of our delightful circle of merry friends who's chosen to share the couple's nuzzle in public."

Rainbow bit her lip, pausing slightly in her work.

"And you've got to admit," Twilight Sparkle's voice suddenly dipped in. "Big Macintosh is quite a catch."

"One that you don't throw back in!" Pinkie chirped.

"Heh! Exactly!"

"You make him sound large, gigantic, and oafish," Fluttershy said with an angry pout.

"Nothing of the sort!" Twilight stammered. "I only mean to say that you're lucky!"

"Oh. Yes. That I am." Fluttershy sighed, then giggled.

"Surely he is crude at times," Trixie grumbled. "And loud. And odorous. And all of the many grotesque things that Trixie often hears is indicative of stallions."

"If so, I haven't noticed very much," Fluttershy remarked. "Besides, you can place such... unsavory qualities on a lot of living things. It is life, after all."

"She only says that because she spends all her time with animals," Trixie said.

Pinkie Pie exploded with laughter.

"Awwwwwwww shoot..." Applejack trotted in. "What are y'all gabbin' about now?"

"Just stating how wonderfully lucky Fluttershy and your brother are, Applejack," Rarity said. "They do make one of the cutest couples in Ponyville, after all."

"Yeah! Super cute!" Pinkie hollered.

"Hmmm..." Applejack smirked. "I rarely ever hear the word 'cute' and 'Big Macintosh' in the same sentence. But I reckon Fluttershy more than makes up for it."

"Oh please, darling, don't be so coy," Rarity said. "There's certainly a... rustic charm to Apple Family testosterone."

"Boy is there," Fluttershy exhaled. A few blinks later, and she blushed like a beet, trotting off to gather more things from the wagon.

"Well, there must be something irresistible about the Apples," Twilight said, trotting up. "Because looks like Big Mac isn't the only one sharing a tree these days."

"Ooooooooooooooooooh!" Pinkie cooed. "She's so riiiiiiiiight!"

Rainbow clenched her eyes shut.

"What in tarnation are y'all talkin' about?"

"Need I spell his name?" Rarity smirked. "There are oh-so-few letters in it."

"For Celestia's sake! We are good friends! Nothin' more!"

"Good friends... who hang out every single day!" Twilight exclaimed.

"And work the fields together," Rarity added.

"And are always laughing whenever Trixie sees apple horse out and about."

"Pfffft. So Stu is a really pleasant fella to be around. What of it?"

"Let me ask you, Applejack." Rarity leaned forward, smiling. "Has he offered to pay for your meal? At least once?"

"I dun see what that has to do with anyth—"

"Well?"

"... ... ..." Applejack squinted. "Well, now that you mention it—"

Rainbow cleared her throat. Loudly. "Right. So... uh... I'm off to get some firewood." She flew off in a gust of wind. "Better to start earlier than later. Right? Right! Hahahahaha—haaaaaaa..." FWOOSH!

The other mares stood behind, blinking awkwardly.

Comments

[MidnightReflection]

Alright, Midnight's ready to pay extra money for the One-day shipping deal. Is that available? No? Dammit...

[Phoenix Kitten]

"Oh please, darling, don't be so coy," Rarity said. "There's certainly a... rustic charm to Apple Family testosterone."
"Boy is there," Fluttershy exhaled. A few blinks later, and she blushed like a beet, trotting off to gather more things from the wagon.

Well Shy... you walked right into that one.

Dash Dash Dash Dash... you could have just announced that you were going to get firewood.
Way to be a mood kill.

[Sharp Quill]

"Pfffft. So Stu is a really pleasant fella to be around. What of it?"

Here's hoping Stu encounters the business end of a platypus spur. Maybe the one Apple Bloom will be getting as a pet? Oh, don't worry... I'm sure Fluttershy will give AJ's sister the necessary care and handling instructions—which Stu won't be receiving.

[Appledash_Gurl]

Please let Stu secretlu evil. PLEASE

~ADG

[Sheendough]

6776984 Need I remind you there's a lost le—? ... Oh dear lord... No. No, please, let's hope it doesn't end that way.

[Lightning Bearer]

Smooth.

[Mares-a-Mares]

6777038
Ditto. That could've gone a lot better, but thinking about it, it could've gone a whole lot worse.

[Tchernobog]

Murder...death... kill!

[Leftover of Saikano]

Don't you guys ever feel bad for hating Stu? He's a good guy, and you are wishing him death because of a ship. I, myself, don't feel bad.

[Hestia]

Poor Dash. Can't get away from Stu even when he's not on the trip.

[Typoglyphic]

We're due for another adventure arc soon, aren't we? Is it going to be Discord? Some skeleton in Stu Leaves' closet? Maybe a trip to New Saros?

I guess it doesn't matter so long as it halts or undoes Rainbow's social progress. Is anyone still reading this solely for the promise of AppleDash? I feel sorry for anyone who is.

[Sharp Quill]

6777646 He's a "Gary Stu," literally. His sole purpose in this story is to make Rainbow Dash's life miserable, her imperfections thrown in her face by his sheer perfection. He's no less an antagonist than Squidgy, and less sympathetic.

[BabySkittleMonster]

6778545
And just like the typical Mary-Sue/Gary-Stu dynamic, I find myself irritated at his perfection. As kind and patient as he may be, as thoughtful and generous, it just serves to anger me. I feel bad about hating him, but that doesn't make me dislike him any less. If he stayed out of Rainbow's life then sure. He can live. Otherwise, I want him to make like his surname and leave.

[zaponator]

Oh what's this? Stu is making Applejack happy? Can't have that! Better kill him.
-Everyone on every chapter