• Published 4th Dec 2013
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Appledashery - Just Essay



Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.

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You'll Grow Feathers On Your Talon

Gilda flew for several blocks down an industrial district of the lofty griffon city. Touching down past a row of warehouses, she trotted towards a large brick building with tall chimneys that billowed smoke into the air. Several other griffons joined her in the casual shuffle. For the most part, the urbanscape here was considerably less rowdy than elsewhere, though that didn't stop an occasional fist-fight or two from breaking out along the outer fringes. Whenever a griffon fell down for the count, Gilda and her companions simply stepped over them and proceeded with their march.

At last, Gilda entered the side door to the brick building. Steam hung along the rooftops, and moisture coated the translucent gray windows. The heavy sound of machinery and buzzing instruments filled her ears. With an emotionless breath, she got into line, punched in at a time clock, then proceeded into a lockerroom. Most of the griffons there had already emptied, leaving behind a find coat of feathers that stuck to the moldy floor.

Ignoring the general malaise all around her, Gilda reached a single locker, opened it, and began reaching for the contents within. She plopped a yellow hard hat atop her skull, then threw a white workcoat on... or at least tried to. With an inward groan, the catbird fussed and struggled, her beak struggling to break through the neckline.

Suddenly, a pair of blue hooves reached in from behind and yanked the collar down.

Gilda's head burst through, and she breathed with relief. "Thanks, Rainbow—" Her eyes bugged and she spun around with a squawwwwking sound. "What the frig?!"

"Seriously?" Rainbow leaned back with a smirk, sporting a petite helmet and workcoat of her own. "You put your helmet on before the coat? What are you, a kindergartener?"

"What are you frickin' doing here?!" Gilda snarled.

"Plus, you hatched out of an egg. Why's a jacket so hard for y—" Rainbow suddenly wheezed.

Gilda gripped her throat with an angry talon. "Answer the question, dweeb!" she snarled into her muzzle.

Rainbow gnashed her teeth, using her wings to bat away Gilda's grip. "You know what they say: 'When in Roam.'"

Gilda's glaring eyes flickered. "You can't work here! You're a pony!"

"Right." Rainbow grinned. "I volunteered."

"You c-can't volunteer!"

"Uhhhh... yeah I can." Rainbow turned and pointed out the lockerroom doorway. "That dude with the pelican beak practically paid me to take this thing off him!"

"You mean Old Gus?!" Gilda folded her feline forelimbs, frowning. "That old gull is a wino! He's practically fired next week!"

"Well, guess you can thank me later for the shift coverage!"

"And just how long do you plan on pulling this stupid little stunt, soft-hooves?"

Rainbow frowned. "Until the moment you stop being a butt and help me."

"Pffft... ain't gonna happen." Gilda spun around with a twirl of her tail. "So why don't you—"

"'Buzz off.' Yeah. I get it," Rainbow angrily marched after her. "Seriously, girl, were you hatched with those friggin' words tattooed to your crest feathers?"

"I'm gonna say it until you get a clue."

"Well, good thing for both of us I'm a clueless idiot!" Rainbow's voice cracked. "Now will you stop dragging your talons and hear me out?"

"I'd much rather hear my own mother regurgitating a porcupine..." Gilda grumbled.

"Gilda, let's not bring your old trips to the prison into this..." Rainbow glanced around as the two traversed a steamy hallway. "...what the hay does a girl like you do at a job like this anyways?"

"Nothing a prissy prancing pony like you could possibly handle."

"Bring it," Rainbow said, tilting her helmet forward with a smug grin. "I've handled you in the past, haven't I?"

"Pffft! Hardly!"

"Then name another pegasus who even tried!"

"... ... ..." Gilda merely glared at the passing floor tiles.

"Well?!"

"Just leave me alone, Dash," Gilda grumbled, flapping her wings and entering a large, large chamber at the end of the hall. "I have to go beat my meat."

Rainbow's double-take was so fierce, she nearly broke her neck. "I beg your pardon."

"You heard me!" Gilda frowned over her shoulder. "What kind of a place did you think this was, anyways?"

Rainbow Dash stepped into the chamber, and her ruby eyes reflected a rusted scarlet sheen. The air hung with the weight of a bloody odor, and a putrid musk filled the breaths in between. Before the pony, several metal hooks were suspended from an elaborate series of revolving metal pylons, and each hook had a gigantic side of meat, pierced and dangling, complete with exposed ribs and ragged tendons. Crimson juices dribbled down, flowing into metal grates that had rust and grime collected throughout the ages.

Every square foot of the room was occupied by a griffon in a white workcoat, and he or she was busy slapping, punching, and pulverising the slabs of meat with their talons—gloved or otherwise. The consistency of the prolonged bludgeoning was evidently more important than the hygenic steps taken to maintain it. The stuffy air of the place was ripe with grunts, slapping sounds, and the persistent scent of feathery backsweat. Each worker took constant breaks, sitting down on a bench every ten minutes to rest their bruised talons before standing up and resuming their task.

"What... wh-what is... even...?" Rainbow blinked, glancing down at the coat she was wearing. It was then and only then that she took notice of several irremovable red stains.

"Not every factory is a rainbow factory, Einstallion!" Gilda spat. She calmly shuffled over to her lone corner of the room, slipped on a pair of gloves, and looked Rainbow's way. "Griffons have gotta eat. And meat is on the menu. Tough, unswallowable meat." She calmly jerked a lever, and a metal hook lowered with a juicy slice of meat dangling from its impalement. "That's where we come in." She spun with a grunt and began punching the raw flesh into wet, messy submission. "Rnngh! Grnnngh! Httt! Fuuu... gotta... tenderize it... break and soften the bone..." She grinned, sweating through the violent act. "Or else no bird's ever gonna buy from this place's stock..."

"It... you... that..." Rainbow held a hoof over her muzzle as her coat went green. "Just... what... what's this made... m-made...?"

"It's no one you know, if that's what you're wondering," Gilda said.

Rainbow's eyes merely twitched.

"Hmmmf..." Gilda smirked casually, punching and hammering the quivering dead muscle. "Up north of here, we have hundreds of thousands of specially-bred cattle. You have cows in Equestria, don't you? Well, there you put them into pens, and here we put them into our stomachs. It's all gravy—no pun intended—at least according to the Griffon-Pony Accords from the end of the last war centuries ago. Of course... history was never your strong suit, was it, Dweebette?"

"Guhhhh..." Rainbow Dash fell to her knees, gripping her belly. A granite statue stuck his head out of a side pocket with a curious expression, and she slapped it back in place before fighting waves of nausea.

"Oh, grow a spine already, Dash," Gilda said, chuckling. "I stomached all your lame-o tea parties and Winter Wrap Up songs over in Cloudsdale, didn't I? Of course..." Her beaked nostrils flared. "A girl will do stupid things when she thinks it's for a friend. When she believes she's worth more than a wad of pegasus spit!" She snarled and smacked the meat hard, splashing dirtied blood onto her coat's collar. "Face it. Whatever brought you here, it'd might as well bring you back home. This ain't no pretty pony town. You belong with your real friends. Goddess knows you're super cozy with them anyways."

Whurrr! A dangling side of meat lowered on a hook beside Gilda.

The griffon paused, panting. She looked over, her eyes narrow. "...the Hell are you doing?"

"Ahem..." Rainbow Dash swallowed something down her throat, nevertheless standing proud and tall. "What does it look like?" She cracked the joints in her neck. "Volunteering." With a grunt, she spun and kicked the meat hard with both rear hooves. "Hrnnkk!"

The meat splattered, quivered, and tenderized from the inside out. Rainbow kept hitting it, exchanging one rear hoof after another.

Gilda blinked. She fought the urge to chuckle. "You can't be friggin' serious, dude..."

"Does it look like... I'm here for... fun and games...?" Rainbow wheezed, sweating and panting between each impact. "...I'm not leaving... until we... talk things over..."

"Rainbow, there's nothing to talk over," Gilda said with a glare. "If there was, you would have shown your yellow flank here a lot sooner."

"Get off your eggpile," Rainbow grunted. "This is not about you. This isn't even about me." Rainbow snarled, kicking the meat harder.

Gilda blinked. "... ... ...then who in buzzard's name is it about?"

"Heh..." Rainbow smirked devilishly. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Gilda's headcrest lifted... then deflated. She performed a huffing sigh, then returned to punching her meat. "You're gonna faint..."

"No I won't."

"Right into your own vomit."

"No... grnnng... I won't."

"Wanna bet?"

Silence, save for the meaty impacts.

"Twenty bits, dweebenheimer, that you don't even make it past the first slab of—"

"Will you stuff it?!" Rainbow snarled. "I've got some meat to slap!" Her sweaty brow furrowed. "Or do you want me to make you look bad that easily?"

"Hrmmf..." Gilda returned to her job while Rainbow Dash achingly toiled away.

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