Appledashery

by Just Essay

Delivery Number Trois

Days later, Rainbow Dash knocked on the front door to a pink-painted house along the western edges of Trottingham.

“Uhm… hello?”

Behind her, the delivery wagon stood, parked beyond an amazingly well-kempt garden with a dozen different pastel shades of flowers that all glistened in the morning light. Bees and butterflies buzzed behind Rainbow’s ears, causing her to flinch slightly.

”Ungh… friggin’ Hearts and Hooves Day vomit all over this place. Hellllloooo?” She knocked again. “This is the time and the place for me. What about on your end? Huh? Time’s a-wasting!”

Finally, there was the sound of a lock unlocking… followed by another… then another and another.

Rainbow Dash blinked, fidgeting slightly as she sensed the sound traveling its way down the far end of the door.

At last, the thing creaked open, and a pair of gray eyes peered out, followed by an even grayer muzzle with the grayest of manes. “Why, hello there, dearie,” a mare who had to have been pushing somewhere close to a century spoke with a wrinkled smile. “Why, you griffons are getting faster and faster by the day.”

“Uhm… thanks?” Rainbow cleared. “Although, I’m not a griffon.” She blushed slightly as her tail flicked. “As m-much as I’d like to be…”

“Would you like to come in for some tea, darling?” The mare opened the door part-way and gestured inside the homely cottage. “I’ve got some herb of field mouse. It’s a favorite among griffons.”

“I… am thankful for the offer.” Rainbow Dash cleared her throat. “But I really really gotta make this delivery.”

“Make what?”

“The delivery.”

“Delivery?”

“The package!” Rainbow pronounced clearly and distinctly. “Y’know, the parcel that I gotta get from here to there for the benefit of a bunch of shady cloaked ponies and the clients who trust them?”

“Mmmmmmm…” The mare rubbed her chin. “Oh! Right! But of course! Wait right here, precious!” The mare turned and turned and turned and turned and waddled away.

Rainbow Dash fidgeted so hard she started to rattle on the ends of her hooves. She clenched and unclenched her teeth, fighting the urge to look at the clock in her saddlebag.

The morning dew had practically dried off the flower garden by the time the mare shuffled back. “Ahhh… here you go…” She hoofed Rainbow Dash a large lavender box with finely embroidered wrapping. “This should do divinely…”

“Now we’re talking.” Rainbow Dash blinked at how easily it held in her grasp. “Wowsers. Kind of light.”

“Mmmm… yes…” The mare smiled. “And flouncy and breezy. I do believe he will like this one--”

“Erm… the less you let me know about it, the better. Shadow McShadeShade would probably pay me more if stuff was kept confidential.” She made a face at the box. “You sure you taped this enough, lady? I’m not sure this is exactly travel safe.”

“Oh, he can travel in it all he wants, or stay at home.” The mare took five whole seconds to wink. “To each their own.”

“Oh… kay…” Rainbow Dash sauntered back towards the wagon. “Time to fly!”

“Good bye, dearie! Keep safe!” The old mare waved. “Remember to wash your talons twice a week!”

---

“Huhhhhhhhhhhhh…” Rainbow squinted at the map, at her destination, then back at the map again. “Huhhhhhhhhhh--sure, whatever.”

She pocketed the thing back in her saddlebag and flew down, landing in the center of a densely housed district of Canterlot. Haughty locals barely glanced at her as she trotted up to the front stoop of a white-washed apartment building.

In swift order, she unhitched from the wagon, pulled the package out, and walked speedily to the front door. She was half a second away from knocking when the door opened. A pale-faced unicorn with a blue mane poked his head out, blinking matching eyes.

Rainbow Dash jolted, then stammered, “H-hey there.”

“Did you bring it?” The stallion gulped, sweating visibly as he flashed a look across both edges of the street. “Is it here?”

“Regardless of what the ‘it’ is, I most certainly got it, dude.” Rainbow Dash held the thing out, but froze suddenly. “Wait…” She squinted. “Do I know you?”

The stallion’s pupils shrank. “Uhhhhh…”

“I swear, I’ve seen your dog-eyes before…” Rainbow pointed with the edge of her hoof. “Like… in a photograph or something…”

“Uhhhh… uhhhh…” He sweated and gulped, gulped and sweated. “I-I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Eh… whatever.” Rainbow handed the pretty package to him. “My memory’s usually not the most polished. That’s Rarity’s bag. Oh, and Twilight too--”

Suddenly, the stallion gasped, losing his grip of the package. The box fell to the ground and instantly spilled open.

Rainbow Dash looked down. She saw the tell-tale signs of pink ribbons and white lacy petticoats--

“Guhhh!” The stallion covered it with his trembling body, stealing feverish glances at the curious pony pedestrians across the street. With strong fetlocks, he shoved the contents back into the container and levitated it into the apartment with blue magic.

“Uhhhh…” Rainbow Dash’s brow furrowed.

“You saw nothing, okay!” The stallion wheezed.

“Dude, like, I wasn’t here--”

“What will it take?! I-I know!” He reached past his blue and violet cutie mark and levitated a bit bag from somewhere inside. “Here ya go!”

“Wait!” Rainbow flinched. “But I’m already being paid--”

“You saw nothing!” And the door slammed in her face.

Rainbow blinked. She looked at the stoop of the apartment, then at the bit bag. “Hmmm… well…” Her voice cracked, “When in Roam!”

Whistling to herself, she trotted back to the wagon, hooked herself back up, and flew away.

Comments

[FloydienSlip]

Heh. Rainbow might want to figure out who, exactly, she's working for...

[Aatxe360]

Curiouser and curiouser...

[theswagmanatee]

4089847 can you send me a link?

[Lightning Bearer]

I thought Shining Armor's magic was pink... or maybe that was just his shield spell.

This particular delivery didn't seem quite so nefarious, though the implications are still somewhere between hilarious and unsettling.

[zaponator]

Oh... Oh damn, really!?
Confidential deliveries, eh? Yeah, I can see why...

[YoshiFawful64]

Plot twist: the deliveries are actually much weirder than Rainbow is perceiving them as, but the potion hallucinations are making them seem more normal.

[Misspegasister_]

How many deliveries r there gonna be?? Hopefully not like, 30
Lol

[Gammahoof]

This is like the part of a game where you go do all the random side missions in the quest log without reading anything other than the "go here" and "do this" and so you end up running all over the world with no idea why you're doing anything.

[Metal Aura]

It would be hilarious if in the end AJ was the head of the organization.