Appledashery

by Just Essay

This Is The Part Where You Unsubscribe

"You mean you lost your sense of direction?!?" Lancie stammered.

"Because I was turning around to much to inspect... inspect..." Rainbow shrugged, her voice cracking. "Whatever!"

"But you're a pegasus!" Lancie cackled, frowning. "I thought you always knew which direction was east! Er... north!"

"Do I look like a goose?!"

"No, but I bet you make love like one."

"Lancie..."

"I'm sorry! It's been several eons since I last found myself locked away in the dark heart of a mountain! I have to crack jokes or else I'll crumble into gravel!"

"We are not locked away in the dark heart of a mountain," Rainbow grumbled, nevertheless twirling about with the stone's ruby spotlight trembling. "I just got a bit too wrapped up in some random noises. That's all. What we gotta do now is... is find a way back into the tunnel from which we came."

"There's no moving forward through this mess?"

"I'm... not sure I wanna do that anymore." Rainbow gulped. "I really should never have broken off from Spindel's Narrow."

"Well now she says it out loud!"

"I don't remember you protesting! Ever!" Rainbow frowned. "In fact, you're the one who first discovered this—"

Something skittered closer, thunderous.

"...!" Rainbow spun and shone the light.

The skittering stopped on a dime, but Rainbow's light couldn't catch anything.

"... ... ..." She glanced up, realizing that that particular patch of stone ceiling above her wasn't being illuminated. She tilted the stone's glow upwards, slowly.

But before that patch of rock could be revealed, the skittering scraaaaaaped past her and Lancie, and her light ended up illuminating nothing but dull rock—albeit with a flake or two of pale dust freshly falling loose.

Rainbow squinted.

For a moment, she could have sworn she saw tiny-tiny claw marks criss-crossing over the porous holes in the ceiling's surface.

Lancie whistled, blinked, then eventually said, "Who knows? Could be kittens."

"Shut up, Lancie."

He shrugged with a smile. "I'm just saying—"

"It's not kittens!" Rainbow growled. "If that was a kitten, then I swear off cats forever!"

Lancie giggled.

"What?!?!" Rainbow snarled through clenched teeth.

"Just... j-just..." He pointed with a stone talon. "If instead of 'cats' you had said 'p—'"

"I'm sorry if I'm not in a joking mood," Rainbow grumbled, turning around once again. "Let's just figure a way out of this rathole." She whapped her fuzzy head several times, brow scrunched in deep thought. "Okay... okay okay okay... so we're in a large, wide chamber. If I wanna get back to the tunnel that brought us here... then... th-then I gotta go find a wall first."

She glided down, wings spread outward, and skimmed the uneven floor. The ruby spotlight illuminated the rippling earthscape in front of her.

"And once I've found the wall, then I'll just... y'know... hug its surfaces until I find a tunnel and I take that."

"Ah yes..." Lancie nodded, holding on tight. "The Wolfenstallion Technique!"

"Huh?"

"But if there are multiple tunnels out of this chamber, then your idea is just going to screw you in the end."

"Would it kill you to be positive for once?"

"Well, no..."

"Unnngh..." Rainbow rolled her eyes—but then a solid surface materialized in her ruby spotlight. "Ah! There we go—wait..."

She flapped her wings, coming to a stop. A thick stalacmite appeared, rising up and narrowing before connecting to the ceiling above.

"... ... ...this place is a lot bigger than I thought," Rainbow grumbled.

"Okay, so, like... at first we were lost," Lancie mused. "But now, thanks to you, we're lost within lost!"

"Dude! Not like you were helping any!"

"Sooner than we know it, we'll be locked up someplace, earning ourselves fish biscuits—"

"Lancie, for the love of Celestia, would you—"

More skittering... layers of it, this time. Rainbow Dash turned around, shining the spotlight. She trembled in mid-air, for the sounds doubled on top of themselves, resembling an avalanche of skulls rolling in her direction. She backed up with quivering feathertips, not wanting to actually illuminate the source of the unknown bedlam undulating towards her. The very edges of her light caught sharp, needling shadows, growing more and more numerous.

"Lancie, I... I'm not sure what to do anymore," she stammered.

"Some advice?" He remarked, clinging to her mane. "Let's go anywhere that isn't close to whatever that is."

"Right." Rainbow nodded, spun around, and flew away from the noise. It was no easy feat. The further she glided, she was almost certain the skittering was coming closer. Surrounding. Encompassing. Soon, the entire cavern echoed with it, turning into a deep bass roar of predatory rumblings.

"Whew boy...!" Lancie's voice reached a higher pitch. "That'll haunt your dreams! Hah!"

"Try and be useful!" Rainbow's voice cracked.

"I am!" Lancie frowned. "I'm exercising guile and spunk in the face of impenetrable calamity!"

"How about, instead, you keep an eye out for—" Rainbow flew smack-dab into a griffon's feathery forehead. "Ooof!"

"Guh!" Lancie's body was flung forward. He grabbed onto Rainbow's mane, anchoring himselft at the last second.

Rainbow drifted backwards, then hovered in place. "Oh jeez! Dude... d-dude, I... I-I didn't even see you there!"

The griffon hovered in front of her, teetering left and right from the impact.

"Man, you gotta help me," Rainbow stammered, her ears twitching from the flood of noise coming closer and closer from behind. "I-I got lost in this place you guys built, and I-I think something's after me. Could you help me? We could fly out of here together!"

The griffon said nothing, his head turning away from her.

"Uhhhh..." Rainbow raised an eyebrow. "...buddy?"

"Sparky..." Lancie pointed at the griffon with a single talon.

Holding her breath, Rainbow raised the glowing stone.

The griffon's head was turning around and around in a full circle. By the time it returned, Rainbow saw a petrified beak and a mottled crest of feathers—but no eyes. The sockets were completely empty—save for a crusty collection of dead worms upon greater illumination. It was then that the rest of the griffon's body came into focus, and it was wrapped all over in glossy silk slime.

Rainbow's jaw dropped. It was then that she heard a gross, curdling sound. She looked up, following her gaze with the spotlight of her stone.

Her illumination revealed a thin silk thread from which the griffon's body was suspended. This converged with several other silk threads, all of which were littered with the bodies of petrified griffons wrapped in slime. Finally, as the silk strands joined together, her light caught a bulbous round body with a glistening "hourglass" pattern. Then several onyx-black joints converged in the center, and they were all attached to limbs that were attached to more limbs that were busy with the task of spinning a freshly killed griffon 'round and 'round, wrapping it in glossy white silk coming out of the spinneret of the creature's undulating abdomen.

Then, once the tender morsel was appropriately "packaged," the hulking creature pivoted around on the web, revealed a pair of crimson fangs, and—SCHLUNKKKK!—stuck the hairy things deep into the torso of the feathery prey. The air gurgled with a sucking sound, and it was precisely then that Rainbow's beacon illuminated six beady black eyes positioned in the middle of a gnarled, arachnid face.

The beast stopped feasting, ripped its fangs out of the griffon, and lifted its twitching frame. Upon seeing the living pegasus, the monster's pedipalps stopped quivering, spread wide, and revealed a vertical mouth laced with maggots and blood. Two beaks protruded as the thing shrieked with rancid breath:

"SHREEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEE!"

Rainbow Dash paled, hear ears folding back as she struggled to hold in her lunch.

"Whoah ho ho ho!" Lancie chuckled, his body—as well as Rainbow's—overwhelmed by the beast's shadow. "Suddenly I remember my first date!"

"Hold on!" Rainbow spun, flapped her wings, and bolted away from the web.

On skittering black claws, the ginormous spider grabbed onto the ceiling and thundered after them. Scrk—kk—kk—kk—kktt! "SKREEEE!"

Comments

[RoboRed]

This Is The Part Where You Unsubscribe

1) wow, and/or whoa.

2)

The beast stopped feasting, ripped its fangs out of the griffon, and lifted its twitching frame. Upon seeing the living pegasus, the monster's pedipalps stopped quivering, spread wide, and revealed a vertical mouth laced with maggots and blood. Two beaks protruded as the thing shrieked with rancid breath:

"SHREEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEE!"

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE

[Sharp Quill]

This Is The Part Where You Unsubscribe

Only if it turns out this monstrous spider was also a lawyer. That I could not handle.

[WhitewolfStormrunner]

Ohhhhhhh, snap! Dash get the heck out of there! You and Lancie ain't gonna do Apple Bloom any good if you end up as snacks for a giant mutant (I think) spider!!!

[Keradon]

The... eensy... weensy... spider...

[Autumn Rush]

Giant spider?

*violently shudders*

No thanks. Dash better get out of there quick.

[Sam the Anti-Ninja]

6280424 Nope, although it certainly had the option. But then it did some soul searching and figured it wasn't that heartless.

6280410 I concur with that second bit, also: OH HEEEEEEELL NO!

6280481

[Lightning Bearer]

Heh, I posted that video last chapter as a joke, but I was actually right.

Oh, and

derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/1/6/49__safe_twilight+sparkle_animated_screencap_spike_upvotes+galore_image+macro_reaction+image_running_winter+wrap+up.gif

[viofriedsevey]

Holy fuck I was not prepared for those chills.

[Bulbajer]

img07.deviantart.net/0ebc/i/2014/150/e/d/spider_rarity_by_danmakuman-d7kcvqk.png
Perhaps it was trying to say "squeee"

[Sheendough]

6280585 Nearest Nope Train to Fuckthatshitistan that I can jump into?

[PropMaster]

Fuck.
That.
Noise.

[Mares-a-Mares]

Run far away, Dashie~!

[Fishberry]

... And then, the sim collapses, and Rainbow Dash plunges back into Ciderspace!

[YoshiFawful64]

...Well then.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't this the first time in Appledashery that someone's actually gotten killed by a monster/bad guy? The only other death I remember is Shindig's.

[TwilightUCrazy]

... Alright, who shat my pants?

[Leftover of Saikano]

As long as there is no Derpider too.
img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130801151929/villains/images/b/bc/Giant_Spiders_My_Little_Pony.jpeg

[Scohinyha Sanka]

Aunty? What are you doing here? Thought you gone on holiday in Russia.

[zaponator]

Lancie giggled.
"What?!?!" Rainbow snarled through clenched teeth.
"Just... j-just..." He pointed with a stone talon. "If instead of 'cats' you had said 'p—'"

Snnkt

Oh, also, that's some freaky shit at the end there.

[remnants]

Remnants is unavailable right now, please direct all messages to 99 Nope Street, Nopesville, State of HellNope, Fuckthatistan.

[Hestia]

Gah, spiders. Icky gross and terrifying little creatures, even if this one isn't quite "little."

[BabySkittleMonster]

I knew it was a good idea to keep my eyes closed! And, thank you, for scaring me away from spiders for the next... Oh, I don't know, eternity?! This arc is scaring me ever so slightly.

[kihutaja]

"Just... j-just..." He pointed with a stone talon. "If instead of 'cats' you had said 'p—'"

I don't get it.

[Cotton Fluff]

6282175
You'll get it when you're older

To echo everyone else, chani.invisionzone.com/uploads/monthly_08_2014/post-435-0-68998100-1409023299.png

Caves are never a good idea, Rainbow!

[MidnightReflection]

"Right." Rainbow nodded, spun around, and flew away from the noise. It was no easy feat.

No easy feat? Magic would make it all complete.

This Is The Part Where You Unsubscribe

...Unsubscribe? No, I think you meant "This Is The Part Where You Create Alternate Accounts Just To Subscribe Again Without Having To Unsubscribe"

All the best stuff happens when I take a few days off from the literacies.

[Aatxe360]

6280424

They're the firm that knows how to wrap things up. Aatxe-approved!

[DeathFox4]

Good thing I write this...

NOPE!

[Phoenix Kitten]

...have I mentioned that I am deathly afraid of spiders...like... seriously, if I see even so much as a garden spider, a teeny little thing that's barely as big as my pinky finger nail I utterly freak the fuck out.

and yet, two of my favorite pokemon are spiders, Galvantula and Ariados, my favorite Homestuck character is Vriska Serket, the spidertroll.
When I used to play LoL, I had Elise, the spider queen in my roster.

there are very few spider enemies in games that freak me out... the only ones really being Frostbite spiders in Skyrim, and the spider boss in Twilight Princess.

Literally my worst memory in gaming is from Skyrim, when I froze a frostbite spider WHILE IT WAS LEAPING AT MY FUCKING FACE!
ahem....I screamed...I screamed unabashedly like a little fucking girl. because I never want the last thing I see to be a giant pair of spider fangs flying at my face like a missile.

yes...yes spiders freak me out.

[LucyHorseThing]

...I've imagined freakier...
Actually, I haven't. Sleeping in a bathtub full of bug repellent tonight, thanks to you, Essay.

[Dash32]

GAH! I HATE BIG SPIDERS! I'm okay with spiders as long as they are golf ball sized or smaller. Any bigger than a golf ball I turn from a hard ass motherfucker to a little bitch in 0.5 seconds

[DrEggnog]

This chapter was funny AND freaky.

[arancaytar]

nope nope nope NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.

*unsubscribe*

[berrytone]

[bronyheat]

They're just here to play stringed instruments and show her visions of Urohringr's history, right?

Oh... right... wrong skittery, spindly, spidery gang...

Run.

[Jackattack2]

Her illumination revealed a thin silk thread from which the griffon's body was suspended. This converged with several other silk threads, all of which were littered with the bodies of petrified griffons wrapped in slime. Finally, as the silk strands joined together, her light caught a bulbous round body with a glistening "hourglass" pattern. Then several onyx-black joints converged in the center, and they were all attached to limbs that were attached to more limbs that were busy with the task of spinning a freshly killed griffon 'round and 'round, wrapping it in glossy white silk coming out of the spinneret of the creature's undulating abdomen.

NOPENO NO WAY NUH-UH NOT BUCKING HAPPENING I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT EVEN ARACHNOPHOBIC BUT I'M NOT TOUCHING THAT THING WITH A 99 FOOT SCYTHE UNLESS IT KILLS IT