• Published 4th Dec 2013
  • 16,658 Views, 16,177 Comments

Appledashery - Just Essay



Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.

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Beaugestion

"And so the first apple tree he ever bucks... and I'm talkin' the very first one..." Applejack smirked as she and Stu sat at the table with the girls. "A honey badger plum falls out of the darn thang and lands on his flank."

"Snkkkkkt!" Pinkie nearly fell over with giggles.

Twilight chokes on a doughnut bite. She levitates a mug of water to her muzzle, takes a sip, then exhales. "You c-can't be serious!"

"And boy was that little varmint mad as the dickens!" Applejack tilted her head back and smirked. "I'm surprised it didn't wrangle its way up to Stu's head and claw his eyes out."

"Good h-heavens!" Rarity stammered, trying not to laugh. "How did you ever escape that situation unscathed, Mr. Leaves?"

"Hmmm-mmm..." Fluttershy smiled aside. "I've heard this story before."

"And AJ tells it a lot better than I ever could," Stu managed with a crooked smile. He looked to his right. "AJ?"

"Well, naturally the first idea that entered my head was to kick the ever-livin' stuffings out of the thang. I mean, there I was tryin' to teach Stu how to properly buck trees, and this ball of fur and claws gets entangled with him."

"Trixie assumes that you found an alternative method of dealing with the honey badger."

"Well, I've learned a thang or two over the past few years. So, I held back, decidin' to go fetch Fluttershy instead so that she could coax the critter off of Stu."

"'Dun ya move an inch!' was what AJ said, if I recall correctly," Stu remarked, eliciting a few more chuckles from the table. "And, you know, I'm quite willing to do what Applejack says... when I don't have a blood thirsty marmot on my back."

"Honey badger," Fluttershy corrected.

"That too."

"Heeheehee!" Pinkie Pie smiled. "So did ya get to Fluttershy in time, AJ?"

"I never had to, Pinkie," Applejack said. "That's the whole point." She opened her muzzle, lingered, then glanced aside with a smirk of pride. "Tell 'em, Stu."

"It's... nothing to boast about."

"I didn't say ya had to boast, ya silly stallion! Just tell it to 'em straight!"

"Well, alright." Stu Leaves cleared his throat, twirling a mug around in his hooves. "I... uh... I got the honey badger to cool down."

"Oh?" Twilight Sparkle blinked. "What did you do?"

"I flapped my wings at it."

The crowd full of mares merely blinked at him.

"Erm..." He gulped. "I just... waved my wingfeathers at the angry little thing and he... calmed down." A nervous smile. "Eventually."

"Just like that?" Trixie asked.

Stu took a sip, then swallowed. "I did say that I 'cooled it down,' didn't I?"

"Heh heh heh..." Applejack slapped the table top and wiped a tear from her eye. "It just kills me!"

"Heeheehee!" Pinkie grinned. "I get it!"

"Sounds like dumb luck if you ask me," Rainbow said.

"Rainbow!" Rarity pouted.

Rainbow merely smirked. "But hey, props all around. I would probably have suplexed the stupid thing. Leave it to Stu to have a cool head."

"I ain't a fan of razor-clawed thangs fallin' on my... well..." Applejack blushed slightly as she smiled at the tabletop. "...on my coltfriend here..."

Fluttershy giggled.

"But reckon it still ain't no reason to smash the thang to smithereens." Applejack leaned in to nuzzle Stu's shoulder. "As ya can tell, I'm awful proud of him for not bein' a total meathead about it."

"To be perfectly honest, I was j-just trying to fly away," Stu said.

The table filled with laughter.

"Oh hush." Applejack winked. "Ya did great, ya clumsy oaf."

"I-I think it's still up in that tree, AJ."

"And what did we discuss before? You never have to buck the same apple tree ever again."

"Promise?"

"Would I lie to you?"

"No." Stu coughed. "But... I-I'd really like you to be around when I go apple bucking again, because I can't tell the trees apart to save my life."

"Hahahaha!" Applejack rolled her eyes. "Yer hopeless."

"Eheheh... that's m-me, alright!" Stu said, taking another sip. "Stu Hopeless Leaves."

"Heheheh..."

"Wow..." Twilight Sparkle bore a rosy smile. "You two are... uhm..."

"Absolutely adorable together," Rarity purred.

"Ugh." Applejack groaned. "We didn't come here to be doted on."

"Then why did you come here?" Fluttershy asked, smiling. "Hmmmm?"

"Plain and simple." Applejack smiled. "I wanted y'all to know just why I'm so plum happy right now in my life." She locked her left fetlock with Stu's right, winking at the table.

"Trixie congratulates you two."

"This calls for a special treat!" Pinkie Pie gasped deeply. "A triple fudge sundae!"

"Oh, please..." Stu chuckled. "You don't have to go through the trouble—"

"Don't you worry!" Pinkie bounced away. "It's on the house!"

"Don't bother stoppin' her," Applejack hummed to the stallion. "Might as well try and tell water to stop bein' wet."

"R-right."

"I've been meaning to ask, Applejack," Twilight spoke. "Now that Apple Bloom has fully recovered—and she has recovered right?"

"Darn tootin'."

"Well, has she been dealing with any stress from school?"

"Beg yer pardon?"

"Well... she did miss out on quite a few of Cheerilee's lessons while she was bed-ridden."

"Oh. Yup, I suppose that's true."

"Well, I'm more than willing to pay the farm a visit and tutor her." Twilight smiled. "There's still a few weeks before Spike, Trixie and I make our trip to Canterlot. I'd be more than willing to help Apple Bloom catch up."

"Well, that's mighty neighborly of ya, Twilight..."

As the mares continued speaking...

...Rainbow found her eyes locked on Stu.

Stu Leaves was still smiling. However, it was a very thin... very delicate expression. His eyes fell to the table top, and although he sat perfectly still, he could be seen spinning the mug in his fetlocks... around and around and around. His shoulders shook slightly, and he let loose a prolonged exhale.

Rainbow Dash blinked, raising one eyebrow. Then Rarity said something that stole her attention, and she joined the conversaton once again.

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