Appledashery

by Just Essay

When In Doubt, Fury Spec It

Rainbow Dash shuffled forward, slipped on water-slick rock, and fell—nearly impaling herself on a jutting stalagmite.

Lancie rushed in and propped himself against the floor, holding Rainbow's body up like a living jack. "Mmmfnngh... b-better lay off the cider, girl...!"

Rainbow shuddered, staring listlessly ahead. "Just hold her hoof. Move forward." She gulped. "Don't stop for nothing..."

"Eh, who am I kidding?" Lancie steadied Rainbow's hooves, then scurried ahead, motioning for her to follow him. "You're lighter than the feathers clinging to you. When we're through with this, and you've saved Princess Frecklestasia's little brat from the brink, promise me you'll have a feast on fruit to end all feasts."

"Lancie... where...?" Rainbow teetered slightly, then proceeded ahead with shuddering hoofsteps. "Where are we going...?"

"An exit! I think... Look, you were down for quite a while," he muttered, hopping over rock crags and ascending a jagged slope. "But I found a place where the air is moving out. And where there's airflow..."

"It didn't hurt all that much, really," Rainbow Dash rambled, ears twitching as she struggled to ascend the slope. "I... I think I wanted them to hurt... but the stinging was all inside."

"Mrmmmfff..." Lancie reached down, using his scrawny stone talons to pull Rainbow up by her fetlocks. "Okay, for once, you've thrown me for a loop. What are we even talking about?"

"Listing's hooves," Rainbow muttered. "I've been hit by worse since," she muttered, wincing slightly. She stared past walls and walls of rock, glistening from her ruby stone. "I didn't cry then... but only because I didn't feel like crying."

"Surely, Sparky, you have it within you to speak of something else."

"Gilda was hurt, because of me," Rainbow muttered. "And it hurts to know that she feels hurt. But even now..." Her head slowly shook. "I can't even cry. Why would I want to?"

"What... exactly did you see when you were conked out, my little pony?"

"Everything..." Rainbow's jaws tensed as her pupils shrank. "Nothing. All I am. All I'll ever make of myself."

"Now, don't say that!" Lancie ascended a cliff and watched as Rainbow climbed awkwardly over it. "You've a pony who will have pierced the griffon's Wind Barricade!" He bore a crooked smile. "That's something to be proud of, r-right?"

"The Wonderbolts, Lancie," Rainbow droned, heaving as she pulled herself over the cliff. "Lead... wingpony... nnngh... flying ace of Equestria, known the world-over..." She stood on wobbly limbs, leaning against a wall. "That's what I could have been by now. If only..."

"If only what?"

Rainbow stared at a fissure in the wall. A series of hairy fangs shot out and impaled her throat. "Gaaaugh!" She stumbled backwards, clutching her neck. As the fog cleared in her vision, she stood—hyperventilating—staring at a barren wall.

Lancie glanced at it, then back at her. "Have all the juices quite cleared...?"

"I... feel..." Rainbow panted and panted, staring at the wall and sweating. "...clouded..." She gulped. "Yet lucid..." Her eyelids hung heavily. "Never felt so awake... yet sleepy..." She deflated slowly towards the cave's floor.

"Nope. Uh uh." Lancie rushed over and lifted her rump before it could fall. "Stay. With. Me. Grnngh!" He forced her upright. "The moment you go out, girl, then you could become spider food! Real spider food!"

"You know, in Cider Space..." Rainbow Dash murmured aloud, teetering as she trotted forward. "...I went through death's door."

"Uh huh..." Lancie scurried after her like a little serpent.

"And I faced my ultimate fears... and ultimate joys..." Her eyes teared slightly. "...but I'm still me." She leaned against a stalacmite, grimacing. "Still alone..."

"And still alive," Lancie growled, rushing ahead. "Which means you appreciate the notion of a second chance!" A pale light glistened off his antlers, and he smiled. "Speaking of which..." He turned and pointed at a pale slit ahead of them. "Viola! Don't ever say that I led you astray, Sparky!"

"... ... ..." Rainbow Dash slowly turned around.

Lancie craned his neck. "...Sparky?"

Just then, the cave shook. Black limbs shredded through the darkness, and a big bulbous body emerged from below. "SKREE-EE-EE!" The Matriarch returned, its pedipalps wriggling in the air.

"Ah jeez, the fat mare certainly is holding her soprano voice in!" Lancie sneered, rushing up towards the light source. "Move your tail, Sparky! There's no way in Tartarus that Charlotte here could fit through the—"

Swoooosh! A blue blur surged past him.

Lancie did a double-take. "...Sparky?"

"HRAAA-AAA-AAAAAUGHHH!" Rainbow Dash surged straight towards the giant beast, her eyes flaring.

The spider jolted, its brain not having calculated the sudden charge. It leaned back, swinging both pedipalps.

WHAM! Rainbow Dash plowed through them and landed a vicious drop-kick in the center of the giant spider's face. Sp-Splat! One of its eyes exploded in black goo.

"SH-SH-SHREEEEE!" The monster reeled back, swinging two of its front legs.

WH-WHAP! The impact sent Rainbow flying towards the side. She slammed against a stalagmite, knocking loose the jagged tip off its foundation. She was barely grounded for three seconds before hopping up, dodging another leg-swipe, and grabbing the rock shard from the ground like a spear. "Rggghhh—!" She flapped her wings, dodged two more leg swings, galloped up a wall, bounced off, and came sailing down at the beast. "HAAAAAAAAUGH!"

The spider tried lunging forward, only to be pummeled viciously in the face by the stone club. It backed up, then grabbed at Rainbow with its pedipalps. The feelers clasped onto the edge of the improvised weapon in Rainbow's grasp.

The pegasus' swift solution was to let go of the shard completely, spin around, and buck her end of it with two rear legs. WHUDDD!

The sharp end was forced violently into the spider's maw. Its fangs spread wide while it's vertical mouth gurgled on blood and maggoty flesh strips.

FWOOOSH! Rainbow Dash flew forward, shoving the impaling shard deeper and deeper. "You don't scare me," she hissed, eyes twitching as she applied more and more pressure. "I've faced worse monsters than you! Slept with them!" She spat. "And I'm too friggin' in love to die to some goddess-forsaken trash heap!" With that shouted, she snapped off her end of the shard, spun around, and threw it mercilessly against the spider's limbs.

SNAP! Two legs broke savagely, and the matriarch slumped to its side, letting loose a pained moan. It spat the bloodied half of the shard out and backed up, shivering all over, its remaining legs bending inward as it cowered away from the mare.

"Aaa-aaa-aaaaugh!" Rainbow shouted, hovering above the wounded cretin. "Now scram and never eat any pony or griffon ever again!"

"Skree-eee! Shree-ee-ee!" With whimpering decibels, the beast made itself scarce, dragging blood and silk strands back into the dark heart of the mountain.

Rainbow Dash panted... panted... then fell. She slumped against a wall of rock, clenching her eyes shut.

Dumbstruck, Lancie finally scurried over to her side. He perched on a rock, resting a tiny talon against her fetlock. "So... uh... where was your 'Goddess mode' back in griffon steroid town?"

"Not now, Lancie," she squeaked, gulping, gathering her composure. "Heart... throbbing..."

"Probably the best, smartest thing you could have done." He smirked. "Getting that blood to flow—adrenalized and such? Bet it's flushing the leftover venom out as we speak."

"Hrmmmm..." Rainbow gulped, opening her weak eyes and staring ahead. "Just glad to get the... get that out of the..."

Silence.

Lancie craned his neck. "Get what? The spiderses out of the way? If so, I whole-heartedly agree."

"... ... ..." Rainbow stared straight ahead.

Applejack stared back, leaning casually against a wall of rock. "Nice job, sugarcube." She tilted her hat back and smirked. "What else are ya gonna murder before this whole shindig is done? My lil' sister, I bet."

"Sparky?" Lancie leaned in. "What is it?"

Rainbow's nostrils flared. "Nothing." She trotted past Applejack, making for the exit. "I'm fine. Let's go."

Comments

[RoboRed]

...Jeeeezus, what a sudden beatdown....

[MidnightReflection]

This is really getting good. Listing Breeze is definitely going to be an arc of its own when we get back to Ponyville, and after Southern Hoof Don Canter has been thoroughly thrashed.

By the way, if you haven't already, try eating Red Apple Orchard Skittles while reading this. I remember eating them all day when I first found this story back on Valentine's Day.

[viofriedsevey]

Holy shit, obviously at this point in my life, and my obsession with a little girls show, manly doesn't really define me in any sense of the word. But what sliver of manliness was left fell into the ether when I couldn't contain my smile at the rainbow colored little pony fighting defeating the spider.

[DeathFox4]

That was perfect. Goddess mode indeed.
High hoof Lancie. You've earned it.

That applejack thing though.

I just looked at the chapter number...and considering what arc we are in, I'm scared.
646 and 20 chapters from 666....

Please dont be this mean author...

[Sarda]

I think one use of 'spiderses' was enough, thank you

[Sam the Anti-Ninja]

6313165 Now if she can harness that rage, she'll be set for dragon town.

6313226 depends on your definition of manliness, but yeah, I get it.

[destinedjagold]

Holy shi—! I finally caught up!
*removes from my Read Later list and fav's this story*
And thus...I join those who wait for this fic's daily updates... Darn... *sigh...*

[Fishberry]

What's that up ahead? Is it daylight?

My bet's on manacrystals!

Out of the fire and into an even BIGGER fire, Dashie!

mlpforums.com/uploads/post_images/img-2646264-1-308490__safe_rainbow+dash_solo_clothes_moon_scarf_night_goggles_fire_injured_badass_epic_artist-colon-britishstarr_awesome.png

[Tchernobog]

God damn, AJ-hallucination!

[TwilightUCrazy]

...Well alright, then.

[Leftover of Saikano]

Spiderses. I never actually read that story.
Now let's hope she doesn't spend more than one chapter walking the rest of the wall.

[Hestia]

NOW I can say goodbye to the icky creepy crawly spiders.

[zaponator]

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Lancie really is the best. The fact that he tends to keep his true colours mostly hidden only makes them all the brighter when they manage to shine through.

[BabySkittleMonster]

6313241
You know, now you've said that, it's a certainty. Well done. You've ensured imminent doom in 20 days.

[JodiePonyPuddinAndPie]

-generations later-
"Papa, why do we always wear rainbow coloured cloaks when we go through the caves?"
"The spiders seem terrified of them for some reason," he replied with a shrug. "An animal talker asked them once and they just kept whimpering about some kinda 'flying rainbow demon'."
"Cool!"
"Hell yeah!"

[Sileadh]

It really says something about my perspective of yourself and that of Discord's character, that I'm completely unsure whether you meant to write "viola" or "voilà.

[remnants]

That title, do I see a WoW reference?

And this is gonna be interesting with asshole AJ hallucination

[Bulbajer]

6313599
Welcome to the herd.

[Phoenix Kitten]

Anything that haunts us, we should haunt twice as hard.

[DrEggnog]

Oh Dash, you messed up thing you. I wanna give her a hug.

[Seraphimus]

"You don't scare me," she hissed, eyes twitching as she applied more and more pressure. "I've faced worse monsters than you! Slept with them!"

There are monsters and then there are monsters Abuse is a terrible twisted thing that leaves the kinds of scars that never go away.

[arancaytar]

Bucking take that you sorry excuse for a Shelob.