We all know how this goes, don't we? Some unlucky schmuck goes to a Halloween party or convention dressed up as someone evil, gets sent to Equestria, and then ends up antagonizing the locals.

Well my story goes a bit differently. My name is Isaac Donohue, and after a night of drunken partying that I STILL can't remember, I wake up in Equestria fifteen hundred years before the events of canon with five seemingly random superpowers:

Angelic Physiology, so I'm frickin gorgeous now. Oxygen Independence, so I don't need to breath. Asexual Reproduction, just call me Mister Mommy why don't you...Bubble Breath, something useless that I rarely use. Power Replication, otherwise known as a game breaker.

So anyways I befriended everyone's favorite draconequus Discord, and we made such beautiful chaos together. Well, it was more of me trying to reform him before he got stoned by the Princesses in an effort to change history for the better. What a waste of time that was, and as a result of this I got petrified as well for being his accomplice. Can you believe that?

Since I'm free, I've decided to settle down and rule a kingdom of my own. I'm sure there are enough tyrants in the world that need to be overthrown despite Sunbutt's best efforts. But if there aren't any, I'm pretty sure I can steal the Crystal Empire from Sombra before Shining Armor and Cadence do.

The only problem is, THE LAW WON'T STOP CHASING ME!

A LoHAV story that I'm writing as I go on.

ANNOUNCEMENT 6/4/2017: I'm sorry, but this story is cancelled. This has been a long time coming. As I've progressed as a writer I look back on this story with increasing amounts of disgust. Still, I know people enjoy it for some reason which is why I'm leaving it up for posterity's sake. Maybe I'll completely rewrite it from the ground up in the future, but that time is not now.

I just simply go to Comic con with my friends then buy a Katana from a creepy merchant guy who transported me to Equestria. Now I lead a mix species Dynasty kingdom in Equestria, have some sort of bug-like pony have crush on me. A draconequus as my best friend and public enemy no.1 of the entire populace of Equestria well except for PonyVille. Well TO ADVENTURE!!!!

Note: The gundam is human size.

Edit: on advice, changed the name.

(AU equestria)

Ok, so here I am in Equestria, AWESOME! Living the dream my fellow bronies! The minor problem? Instead of the ponies in the show the inhabitants are all anthro versions of themselves. Good news? Twilight and her friends are willing to give me a benefit of a doubt. Bad news? Celestia and Luna despise me, the reason for that? I was brought to Equestria as one of the awesome ones in video game villain history, complete with triforce of power and immense dark magic, the powerhouse, ganondorf! As a result of our first meeting, I wound up petrified for 1500 years, thankfully I figured out a way to keep myself from going insane. But now that I am awake, I have one goal.... "Twilight? What does this symbol here say?"

(T for now but depending on how this goes it may go up, EDIT: added sex tag for upcoming refernces.)

You know all those stories about cos-players disappearing? Well this is kinda like those. Jason Hughes was just a normal guy attending a con for the first time. Of course he had to buy that omnitrix replica right? Well now he's stuck in a world of talking ponies and has to learn what it means to be a pony.

**This somehow got on the popular stories list on 8/16/14, which is only a day after I published it. Thats a new one*

**So this got featured on 8/17/14 I have no idea how that happened but thanks everyone!**

Big thanks to m2pt5 for taking on the role of proofreader/editor. Also want to thank DuskShadowBrony for being my other editor.

So I live in a small country known as Sweden, never heard of it? Let me give your mind some refreshments: We have the all known Falukorv, aka Sausage. the mighty and immortal (derp) Knugen, aka our king. and let's not forget the biggest thing we Swedes have to show for (except being one of the healthiest countries in the world.) IKEA, of course.
But enough of that, Sweden is a very small country, and thus do not get many conventions actually worth going to, but there were one close by-ish, and I decided to go all out with my outfit.
That's right, I went like Alice from Madness Returns, in the Heart Dress, with a functional Vorpal Blade.
***
Another story in the "League of Humans going insane Acting Villainous.", created by... uhh <Jimmy the Grape>. Don't remember whom but the whole thing kicked off with "Rise of Darth Vulcan." Loosely inspired by "Not Having any of this S###" by Technopathic and "F*** it i'm having fun" (The later by Jimmy the Grape.)
This genre was generally started by CrypticMetaphor, and then came Uberdeathninja and i'm not getting into this argument.
Mature rated because, well, she's Alice!
THEME SONG! : Shinedown ~ Her Name is Alice

Ugh.
Alright, do you want some advice?
Don't go evil if you don't want to have heroes trying to kill you repeatedly. I know, sometimes you have to do things that are morally questionable, but at others, just be a good guy. Wait in line rather than summon a horde of undead to tear the throats out of everybody except the barista. Or just freeze everybody in place. That's at least funny in a conventional sense.
I'm (sort of) reformed now.
Unfortunately, there're these six mares and their ruler who are making this VERY DIFFICULT.

EDIT: After four days, the Featured streak has ended. It was a good run.
EDIT: Featured again on 10 May? Aw, stahp it guys. Stahp.

EDIT: New coverart courtesy of Leila Drake. Go to her and commission stuff.

This story is a sequel to Golden Grace, Headless Headaches

Okay, SO, after stopping Omega and saving Equestria from whatever he had planned, along with Measured from certain death, I kinda, sorta, maybe used up a bit too much of my power.
There's no 'maybe' about it, you did.
And Measured, Twilight, and I are going to do some tests to see how bad it is.
Once you stop flinching at the very mention of Twilight's name.
First things first, though. Someone get me away from Cel, she's gone bananas!

Okay let's just go over everything that's happened so far. Dragged into a road trip, check. Dragged to a convention, check. Dragged through dimension. Wait what? Okay, universe. Stop! Seriously what did I do to deserve that last one! Stop throwing me into impossibly horrible situations! It was bad enough being world thrown, but public enemy number 1!? What did I ever do to you!?

Evidently, I must have done a lot. I have been trapped here with nothing but my wit and ingenuity, but I'm still alive and have at least one friend. I decided that it would be better make the most out of my new life, and see if I can live at all in this crazed world of Magic and Myths. Hopefully I won't screw up too badly. I fear what may come if I do. Though.... this is all starting to feel familiar. I'm having some difficulty remembering from where though.
Co-authored from chapter 22 and on with Shinigamisparda

Alt Cover Art
Story inspired by "F**k it, I'm having fun" by JimmytheGrape and everything else in the League of Humans acting Villainous.
Props to them! Cover art is not mine.
Edit*2/13/2014*FEATUREBOXYES!
Edit**4/28/14**Technopathic is amazing and you should thank her greatly for working on new cover art for me. It's not done, but as she does it, I will continue to update my cover.
Edit***5/23/14*** NEW cover art is COMPLETE!
Edit****6/28/14**** Old cover art is back by popular demand

Time, the ever-flowing measure of action. It is not a physical thing that one can touch or feel, but an abstract thought of the difference between now, then, and later; it is the indefinite continued progress of existence. What happens when one has the ability to control time? He is deemed one of the most powerful beings on the planet, for he can stop you in your tracks without any effort at all.

I am this being.

I control Time.

If you're wondering why this story is canceled, check my blogs. I am rewriting it, and will post the new version under a new title. Do not worry.

Featured on 7/6/14 thank you all!!

And featured again on 3/3/15, after it was canceled!!! What has this world come to?!?!

If you're too lazy to read it yourself, (I don't blame you, I do this myself, sometimes) listen to my good friend, The Naive Narrator, read it on his video, Time Ticks on Chapter one! Give him some love!

This is my first LoHAV/LoHAH story. I know how hated the genera is, because it's so overused, but I like the idea of being taken from your home only to be shoved into a world where you don't belong.

Also, some credit is due in the department of the idea. The steampunk theme was inspired by the story Son of Invention, a great story to read if you like this one. The character of Mike goes to this image. I looked for a long time and the closest I could get to the artist was this page.

Thank you for reading and please tell me what you think in the comments.

PS. Any and all chapters in this story are subject to change without notice. I will periodically go back into past chapters and rewrite something that doesn't mach with what is currently going on, so if something seems off, that would be why. Do not PM me telling me how "you didn't tell us that you changed that" or "but it was like this" or any of that stuff. As mentioned before, I will probably not tell anyone about it.

Greetings weary traveler/bored reader. Let me regale you with my tale. The tale of a mere mortal, with nothing particularly special to his name, brought to a magical land of dragons, minotaurs, griffins, and of course ponies. But he came as no mere human. He came as the epic warrior, the manliest of swordsmen, that most dashing of multiverse travelers, the mighty Gilgamesh! What adventures will this powerful and magnificent warrior find in his travels? HELL IF I KNOW! LET'S STRAP IN AND SEE WHERE THIS GOES!

Looking for cover art if anyone's interested.

Crossovers with:
The life and times of Xante, Baron of the Frozen Wastelands, First among Liches, Lord of the Dead, and Fabulous Rainbow Magic User

Golden Graces, Headless Headaches

I Will Hunt You Down

A Thousand Tortured Souls Scream My Name

Gravity of the Situation

Land of Friendship and Magic

And Then There Were 10… Er… 67

Son of Invention

Ten Against One

Time Ticks On

Let's Just Say That Umbra Really Needs to Put a Lock On His Diary

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May 25, 2014: I GOT FEATURED! HOLY CRAP THANK YOU SO MUCH!