"Ok, this one here means X."
"X? But it looks more like H does."
"Blaze, it is an X, the two look nothing alike."
"Maybe to you but it is either an H or you need to work on your writing skills Twilight."
"MY WRITING ABILITY IS NOT BAD ENOUGH TO MISTAKE ONE THING FOR ANOTHER BLAZE!"
I just rubbed my forehead as Twilight started lecturing me on the letters, obviously getting a bit frustrated, then again, we both were, seeing as, as complex as english can be, it turned out that Equestrian was just difficult. Add to that my ability to sit still or rather, lack of ability, and we have a stressful mess. Laying my head on the table, I groaned, "Why couldn't languages be easier to learn?"
Twilight then surprised me, "Look, we aren't getting anywhere like this. Why don't we just take a break, today is a slow day, this way I can figure out a way to help you learn."
Quickly acting on this, I got up and headed for the door, "No arguments from me Twilight, I am just gonna- ACK!"
Right as I stepped out the door, I suddenly found myself drenched in water. As I shook some of the water off, I heard a familiar obnoxious laugh and a snorting one, prompting me to look over and spot both Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. Wiping a tear of laughter away and focusing on my neck as she has taken to doing, Rainbow Dash said to me, "Dude, you should see your face, you look like Applejack's dog Winona after she gets stuck in the rain!"
Shaking off the water, I looked at them, "You do realize, that prank is older than dirt. Even new pranksters pull that prank."
She just grinned, "And yet you fell for it."
At this point, she had done it now, slowly nodded my head, a frown quite evident, I threw down the gauntlet, "So you two think you are good pranksters huh?"
"Dude, we don't think so, we know so!"
Noticing Urahara and Link walking up with Twilight coming out to see what the commotion was and even Rarity walking coming over with Fluttershy, who I tried to ignore the fact her wings popped out with an audible pompf. I pointed at Dash, "Then how about a wager Rainbow Dash?"
She perked up, "Whats the challenge?"
"From tomorrow at noon, to the next day at the same time, the two of you have to avoid being pranked by me. Anyone can join, but ultimately, you two are the targets. If I manage to prank both of you, I win, but if you avoid getting pranked by me, then you two win."
Pinkie Pie then jumped in, "What are the stakes?"
I thought about it then grinned, "Tell me, does disco exist in this world?"
Rarity was the one to speak up, "It did, but thankfully it died years ago, a good thing too, such dreadful clothes!"
This made my grin widen, "Then the stakes are this, the loser or losers, will have to dress in disco era clothes, go into the center of town where the most ponies past through, then do a disco dance while holding a sign proclaiming that the winner is the best prankster! And so that you two can't just skip town to win, you both have to stay in Ponyville unless it is an important and legitimate reason and have someone that can vouch for the reason aside from each other."
Dash looked smug, "Then you better prepare, because you are going down Blaze!"
I grinned, "We shall see Dash, but first..." I looked at the group, "Anyone else want to join in? The stakes are just for me and these two so no one else has to worry about it. So who wants to join in?"
"Sounds interesting, maybe after this I could be known as, 'Urahara the unprankable', I'm in!"
"Business has been slow lately darlings, and this sounds interesting, so I guess count me in."
"I could use this as a way to learn tactics, very well, I will win or my name isn't Twilight Sparkle!"
"I survived an actual war, so a prank one should be a piece of cake, I'm in too!"
When no one else spoke up, I nodded, "Then it is settled!" I held my hand out to shake Rainbow Dash's "May the better prankster win."
She shook my hand, "Oh they will Blaze, I just hope you like bell bottom pants."
The next day at sugarcube corner. 3rd Person
Pinkie Pie was cleaning tables, humming a song when the door opened, causing her to jump. Looking at the door, she calmed down when she seen that it was just Rainbow Dash. Waving her over, she said to her, "Hey there Dashie! Doing ok?"
She nodded and looked around cautiously before asking Pinkie, "Any sign of him making a move yet?"
Pinkie shook her head, "Nope nope! Nothing yet!"
Before Dash could comment, Blaze walked in, prompting them to brace themselves, only for him to seemingly ignore them and to the counter where he placed an order. Before they could think he forgot or anything, The door slammed open and an angry Rarity stomped in, spotted Blaze, then stomped over to him, "YOU BOORISH BARBARIAN! HOW DARE YOU DO THIS! EMBARRASSING ME LIKE YOU DID!"
Curious, Dash and Pinkie walked over and Dash asked her, "Whats wrong Rares? What has you so mad?"
Rarity, whirled to face her, "Just a little bit ago, after Blaze had visited me to discuss clothes, I went out to go for a walk. I didn't get far when I heard some uncouth ponies whistling and such. When I checked to see my back, I found this!" She held up a pair of pants that had a hole in the back. Both Pinkie and Dash had to hold in their laughter as Rarity continued, "I do not know how you pulled this off Blaze, but know this it, is, on!."
With that, she turned and left, leaving Pinkie and Dash to fall over themselves laughing. Stopping to catch her breath, Rainbow Dash asked him, "You really cut a hole in her pants?"
Blaze just shrugged, "All that hot air she has at times has to escape somehow."
With that, he left the two to their laughter as he went out the door. After a bit, it was Pinkie who stopped, seem to realize something and think on it. Seeing her thoughtful look, Rainbow Dash asked her, "Whats up Pinks?"
"Well, its just... How did he do it? Cut a hole out of Rarity's pants I mean?"
"Well he... I... Well hay... How did he do it?"
With that, the two decided to head out and think on it. It was a few hours later, they came across an unusual sight when they found Blaze and Urahara, with Blaze looking up at a dangling Kisuke who was caught by a snare trap. Stunned, the two looked up at the sight while Dash asked Blaze, "What the hay is he doing up there?"
Without looking at her or batting an eye, he replied, "I think he is trying to increase his brain power, though it doesn't look like an effective method."
Holding on to his hat, Kisuke said to them, "I was walking along when I suddenly I found my ankle snagged and myself upside. I must say Blaze, you seem to know me well."
Blaze just rolled his eyes before walking off, Pinkie and Dash following him, ignoring Urahara. As they caught up to him, Pinkie asked, "How did you know when to lay that trap for that Pony Blazie?"
He shrugged, "He just doesn't pay attention. Not my fault he walked into an easy to avoid trap."
Before they could say anything, "Excuse me sir and ladies, but could you help us with something?"
They looked and seen a pair of twin ponies, a stallion with a sandwich chalk board, and a mare with a plate and bit on it. The mare held out the plate, "Head?"
"Or tails?"
Before either of them could respond, they heard Blaze saying, "NOPE, NOPE, NOPE! NOT DEALING WITH THEM! NO WAY NO HOW!"
They turned to see Blaze quickly walking, nearly running to get away, prompting Dash and Pinkie to run after him.
The stallion after blinking in confusion, turned to his sister, "Oh dear, what do you suppose was the matter with him dear sister?"
She turned to her brother, "I do not know brother, he acted like he never seen twins before."
"Perhaps he was simply reminded of something from back in his home?"
"I suppose one never knows."
The two looked back to see a pair of twin beings seemingly pondering the same question, only for them to blink and the beings disappear. After a bit of confusion, the mare spoke up, "Dear brother?"
"Yes Dear sister?"
"Let us pretend this never happened."
"Agreed dear sister."
Back with Blaze and the group.
Recognizing the path as leading to Fluttershy's, Dash went up to Blaze's side, "Why are you going to Fluttershy's?"
He glanced at her, "Why are you two following me?"
She pointed at him, "So we can keep an eye on you! You can't prank us if we keep you in our sights!"
He simply looked amused, "Very well then, anyways, Fluttershy asked me to come over and help her with something so I am heading over to see what she needs."
Arriving Fluttershy's Blaze knocked on the door. When she saw who it was, Dash, Pinkie, and Blaze were all shocked as she seemed to nearly tear the door off the hinges, smiling at Blaze, "Hello Blaze! Thank you for coming!"
Blaze, looking a bit unnerved, asked her, "So, um, what did you need my help with Fluttershy?"
She took his hand and lead him and the others inside, "Well, with as much as you talk about how you want to live in peace, I figured you might feel lonely. I mean, I heard that Link, Lana, and Princess Zelda are living with you, but I never seen you actively speak with others unless you were working with Twilight, someone talks to you, or you needed something from a store."
Blaze looked like he ate a bad lemon. He couldn't deny that he never talked much to others. Rubbing the back of his head, he asked her, "But how am I going to be able to take care of them? I never was good with animals."
She smiled and patted his hand, "I can help you with that Blaze. Once we pick one for you, I will provide you with what you need to know in order to care for them. Just let me gather everyone."
As Fluttershy went about gathering the animals, Dash leaned in to Blaze, "Dude, are you seeing how Fluttershy acts around you? I've never seen her act this way to anyone!"
He whispered back, "Are you sure she isn't a changeling? I mean, she has never acted this way on the show back home either."
"Twilight saw something was weird also and said she cast a spell to let her know if something was wrong with any of us, like a if a changeling tried to replace one of us, but she confirmed that nothing is wrong."
This unnerved Blaze but before he could comment, Fluttershy came back with the animals and motioned to him, "Everyone, this nice stallion would like to adopt one of you and-." They took one look at Blaze, and all of them, even a bear that she brought with her turn and ran like they were facing a monster, "Oh my... was it something I said?"
Blaze sighed, "Body with immense dark power Fluttershy, animals have always never responded well to dark beings, and I am stuck as the embodiment of it."
She gently patted his shoulder, "I am so sorry Blaze, I-." She was cut off when there was a fluttering of wings, and a bird landed on Blaze's head. Fluttershy gasped as he lifted his hand to his head and the bird hopped onto his finger. As he looked the bird over, Fluttershy reached over and stroked her back, "I never thought... I mean, she never wanted to be around anyone. After her mate died a couple months back, this little one would seclude herself, barely even eating!"
Stroking the bird's back, Blaze commented, "It's no wonder, she is a mourning dove." At everyone's confused look, he explained, "Mourning doves, also known as turtle doves are common back in my home, like all doves, they are a symbol of peace, but they are also known in cases as symbols of love because they mate for life in a strong bond. God knows how many references in history and mythology they are involved in. Though, I don't understand one thing." He held the bird up to look it in the eye, "Aren't you afraid of me little one? I an practically darkness incarnate, even all the other animals ran in fear. Aren't you afraid?"
The bird chirped something, and Fluttershy translated, "Oh my, she said she trusts you Blaze."
It was brief, so quick that only Pinkie had seen it and that had been barely, and as a result, ignored it, but when Fluttershy said that the dove trusted him, he flinched. Stroking the dove's head gently, he said to it, "Trust me huh? Then I guess it is fortunate for you that I happen to be fond of doves."
As soon as he said that, the dove flew back to his head and sat on it while a smiling Fluttershy went to say something only for someone to knock on the door. She went and opened the door to find to find that it was Link covered in paint. Upon seeing Blaze he said "You better pray Blaze because I will get you back for this!"
Amazed, Dash asked him, "What happened to you Link?"
Link continued to scowl, "I just went to try to get a nap in a little while ago but the moment I laid in my bed I suddenly had paint dumped on me. So what do you have to say for yourself Blaze?"
He shrugged, "You needed more color in your life!"
Link just scowled and left, followed by a nervous Pinkie and Dash. Looking to Dash, Pinkie asked her, "What are we going to do Dashie? He has almost pranked everyone!"
Dash frowned, "... Lets talk to Twilight, I am certain she will have an idea!"
With that, they made a beeline for the Library, all the while watching for any traps. It was nearly dinner time when they reached the library, having moved slow in order to avoid any possible traps. Once there, they went inside, only to nearly jump out of their skin and fur when bells started ringing over their heads and a panicked Twilight to nearly run. When she seen that it was just them, she breathed a sigh of relief, "Its just you guys, you scared me."
Pinkie rushed to her, "Sorry Twilight, but me and Dashie came here to see if you have any ideas on how to keep Blazie from pranking us."
Twilight looked sheepish, "Sorry girls, the best I can do is take precautions to prevent him from sneaking up on me. Hence, I placed bells over the door. This way, if he tries to sneak in, he won't get me. I set them up first thing this morning and he hasn't made any attempts. Though, you two being here, I am going to have to ask you to leave, I don't want to take a risk of him getting all of us just because we are gathered together."
With that she pushed them out the door. Sitting on the doorstep, Pinkie asked Dash, "Now what are we going to do Dashie? Twilight won't help."
Before Dash could answer, there was a flash of light from the window and a muffled boom. Rushing back inside, they found a catatonic Twilight staring at her bookshelves, which now contained charred and smoking books. As they surveyed the books, Twilight said mainly to herself, "He burned them... he got in somehow, and burned them..."
As she kept saying this, the two slipped out, scared now. Dash went to say something but Pinkie pie gasped, pointing down the street. Following to where Pinkie was pointing, Dash paled as she seen a smug Blaze wave at them, the only gentleness being him keeping his head still to not shake the dove sitting on it. As they watched, he held up one hand with four fingers up before closing them, then holding up two and point both at them. As they swallowed, he turned and walked away. Looking at Pinkie Pie, Dash said to her with panic in her voice, "We need to get to your place and in the basement. NOW!"
In the middle of the night
Dash and Pinkie had taken up a position in the basement, sitting back to back. As they sat, they kept watch, making sure nothing got in. Whenever one would start to fall asleep, the other would nudge her to keep her awake. After a while they started hearing thumps upstairs, getting scared, they braced themselves even as moans started coming down."
Noon the next day at a cafe
A tired yet thrilled duo of Dash and Pinkie made their way to the cafe Blaze frequented, small bags evident under their eyes from staying up all night from paranoia and the Cakes, and seen the others with him as well. Walking up to him, Dash pointed at him, "HAH! A full day unpranked!"
As she gloated, Blaze looked at the others, each of them with a knowing smug look while Urahara said something to Rarity about paying up and she gave him a couple gems. It was finally Pinkie Pie who realized something was up, "Twilight? How come you are here? Aren't you mad that Blazie burned your books?"
She leaned in, "I would be Pinkie, but first, are you two ready to dance today?"
Confused, Dash looked at her, "What are you talking about Twilight? We won! He got you guys but not us!"
Twilight grinned, "Tell me, did you actually see my books catch fire?"
Before Dash could say anything, it was then Rarity who spoke, "And darlings, did you actually see me in public or hear anything about me in public with a hole in my pants?"
Then a smug Urahara spoke, "And me, did you see me get snared by that trap?"
Link, trying to hold his laughter in then spoke, "And did you see me get paint dumped on me?"
Pinkie and Dash were confused when Twilight explained, "You see, Blaze came to us with an interesting idea, and it seemed to prove true. Why does a prank have to be something physically happening? After all, a prank can be a trick, whats more, he predicted you'd be so paranoid, that you would stay awake the whole night. So you see, you tried so hard to avoid being pranked by him, you pranked yourselves!"
Both of them paled in shock as Urahara commented, "Of course, we had to insure you bought the whole trick, so we each made sure to do something that made it look like Blaze was some skilled prankster."
A grinning Blaze nodded, "And I am grateful they did help me. I knew with Pinkie on your side it would be impossible to get you with a physical prank thanks to her Pinkie sense, but I knew she responded to physical things through it, and a mind game isn't physical. Ergo, by all of them faking getting pranked, combined with cues to make you assume that each one was by me, well, there is saying from back home, 'you fell for it, hook, line, and sinker'."
As they stared in shock, the group laughed, then laughed a bit harder when Rarity held up a pair of disco outfits. The two, sweating up a storm, tried to back away as Dash asked, "Is there anyway we can get out of this?"
The middle of town, a couple hours later, Blaze's view
I grinned as I recorded Pinkie and Dash dancing to disco music. Both of them holding a sign that, while I couldn't read it, I knew it was proclaiming me the best, all while looking thoroughly embarrassed as the rest of us and the town enjoyed the show. I knew that the recording would make for great black mail material so I kept recording, even as I heard Fluttershy ask, "So what are you going to name your new dove friend?"
I already thought about, then reached up my free hand to stroke her back as she sat on my head, "I am going to call her Otium, it means peace. Cliche as it may seem, it feels appropriate to name her that."
It was then Link had spoken up saying, "That reminds me, I want to try something."
I waved it off as I continued recording, only to hear the familiar epona's song. Having gotten enough black mail material, I turned to him with the others just as he finished. He looked around for a bit before sighing, "I guess it was a bit too much t-."
"MASTER!"
Before we knew it, Link was tackled by a pony. But I realized along with the others a few things, first off, this pony had a chestnut brown coat but with a white mane and tail. She also had muscles but not a heavy amount of them. She also had blue eyes, but the most notable thing.... she was completely and utterly naked. Seeing the situation, and unable to resist the idea of black mail material on Link as well, I started taking pictures of the two, only to get hit in the back of the head in the process. Looking to the source of the head smack, I found that it was Lana. Giving me a glare, she said to me, "Leave Link alone Blaze."
I shrugged innocently before coughing, "I guess the question is now this.... Rarity, do you have any clothes she could wear?"