A slightly more realistic take on the "Human in Equestria" story concept.

... For a given value of "realistic."

Okay, it's barely realistic but it is a hell of a lot of fun...

Now with an image graciously provided by Page Turner, and an audiobook version narrated by multifanficaday and if you prefer it in German, FrankyDoodle has got you covered!

And a TVTropes Page!

Last Featured: 11/26/2019! Thank you so much!

Discord's the only creature in Equestria who can recognize the human for what he is -- not the long-lost Seventh Element that never actually existed and couldn't have existed before the human arrived, but a meta-reality warper, an entity far more powerful than Discord with the power to warp the minds of all around him and the very rules of magic to make sure that he's always the Big Hero. And the role the human's assigned to Discord is the Villain to beat down or kill.

Pre-reform Discord's fine with being the villain. But on his own terms. Not dancing on some alien interloper's puppet strings.

Without friendship, or even allies, Discord's going to have to find a way to defeat a creature who can alter fate itself and who can even mind-control him. Or he may just end up worse than dead.

Art by Tenchi-Outsuno. Progress Bar at my writing journal.

Trigger warnings: Mind control (magically induced love, magically induced friendship, magically induced stupidity, Discord being Discord), noncon/dubcon (magically induced love, other forms of highly dubious consent), rape (female on male), violence/gore (mostly against Discord), literally everything in chapters 19-21, humans not being presented as unilaterally wonderful and superior to ponies and/or draconequui.

20-year-old Ryan Burbank is living with his girlfriend in their woodland home when he is struck by a mysterious infection seemingly out of nowhere. To everyone's horror, his sickness spreads quickly throughout his body, shutting him down one piece at a time. The doctors are at a loss of what to do about this new form of bacteria. Ryan and his loved ones choose to keep fighting until either a cure can be discovered...or the pain becomes too much.
At the height of his suffering, he discovers a happy little show while watching television in his hospital room. The bright colors and happy attitudes of the cartoon equines provide him with a much-needed escape from the daily pain of being killed from the inside.
Eventually, the pain becomes too much and he decides it would be better to go out surrounded by his family, in the embrace of those who kept him company throughout his short life. Just as he starts to fade, his eyes wander to the screen of the hospital room television and the cartoon ponies who adorn it. Something strange begins to occur...almost like the screen is pulling him in. Tunnel vision, maybe?
No, that can't be it...why can he hear his name being called by a very familiar voice? And why is she...crying? Who is this crying, familiar voice and why does she seem to know him?

[img]https://orig10.deviantart.net/bf87/f/2014/010/3/0/recup_pinkie_sphear_1_2__by_xdrawdex-d71pigr.gif[/img]

SPOILERS IN THE COMMENTS

Rated "Teen" for language and the "Sex" tag is for all of the sexual humor and suggestive situations. If I decide to up the suggestive stuff in the future, I'll change the tags and rating to fit that change.

Cover by enamis.

TD, the human first seen in No, I am NOT a Brony, GET ME OUTTA EQUESTRIA!!! has been in Equestria for a little over a year now and he's just beginning to fully adjust to his life there. However, when he wakes up one morning to discover that five of the Mane Six have switched cutie marks, he endures a significant change when he helps them out.

He is less than pleased.

Edited wonderfully by Strike89

Buy a print copy here!

Twilight, seeing that her friend needed a little bit of companionship, decided to help him get a date.

But boy, did he aim a little too high for her taste.

Now, her and Spike need to help this putz of a human snatch a date from one of the most undateable beings on the planet, Princess Celestia.

Needless to say, they're doomed.

Cover art used with permission by Lydia-Rawr

Warning: Story will contain horrible romance clichés, cutsieness, and all around silliness.

You have been warned.

As the elements were unleashed, the Nightmare knew it was over. But it would not let it's fun end. No, it would not be left behind. It would find another world to bring to ruin. As for the poor sap that was left in It's place? He was going to get blasted, what did it matter what he ended up getting from It?

Cover Image by NetherWalker

Realized there was no link, so I'm adding two, one here and one in the chapter. After the events of Don't Underestimate the Power of a Bored Mare , the juicy bits that I cant put in a T fic: Defining Love

Edit: I swear, half of you are uncultured heathens. The thing in the image with the Nightmare's hair is a substitute doll

The humans called me murderer. Freak. Monster.

My people called me warrior. Heir. Hero.

Them? The ponies? Her?

Friend. Family. Lover.

It's been a long time since anyone ever called me that, and it's even stranger with "love". But can they know me truly? Can I trust them with the truth? And more importantly… can I protect them from the truth?

…from myself?

Thanks to Panzertank for the cover art!