//------------------------------// // 26. Insanity Conquered // Story: Tales of the Oppressed // by Terran34 //------------------------------// “Now then. Ordinarily, if this were a typical training session, I'd start us off with some basic magical endurance exercises,” Shining Armor dictates, walking back and forth in front of me in an official manner. “After all, it is best to determine exactly how much magical power we have to work with.” “Apparently a fucking lot,” I remark, remembering how easily I'd taken care of that Scorpios that one day. Shining Armor doesn't appear to care, however, as he stares at me until I realize that he doesn't want to be interrupted. Right...drill sergeant. At least he isn't yelling at me. “Unfortunately, we don't have the time to wait for your energy to recharge after such exercises, nor am I available to instruct you after this particular lesson,” Shining Armor informs me. “However, at the very least, I would like to instruct you in their procedures, so that you may do them on your own time.” “Okay, what do you want me to do?” Seems straightforward enough. “Pay attention. We are not performing these exercises. First and foremost, exhibit your magic, and show me how well you can control it,” Shining Armor commands. I even think he scolded me a bit in there. Goddamn, this is going to be a pain. Okay, so how did I release my magic with Celestia? I understand she pissed me off, but that kind of release had me trying to murder her. There has to be some other way I can release it. Twilight mentioned something about my magical core. That's in my chest, and I can still feel the magic pulsing gently behind my sternum. It's a weird feeling, like there's a very thick bubble there that keeps changing in size. I don't usually notice unless I'm focusing on it, like now, or if I angry enough to where it wants to come out. “We're wasting time, Rogers!” Shining Armor warns me. Great, and now I'm being rushed. Also, did he just fucking call me by my last name only? Nobody does that. I don't think I've ever been called like that. I tap my sternum in that area in a futile attempt to burst that bubble. There has to be a way to do this without getting angry. According to Celestia it depends on anger to bring forth that insanity, and I don't want that. I might kill this guy, since I doubt he's anywhere close to Celestia's level. “You're not going to have this kind of time during a battle,” Shining Armor points out. I grit my teeth in frustration. Shut the fuck up, I know that. I got lucky back then, that's all. Dammit, this is my magic. It should do what I want. It wants to control me? Sucks to be it, I'm too obstinate to let that happen. I take a deep breath, closing my eyes, and then I push mentally with all my might against my magical core. Almost immediately, I hear and feel the roar of magical power rushing through my core and disrupting the air around me. The ground cracks beneath my feet as magical power swirls around me. Opening my eyes, I am greeted by a strange fucked up field of vision. Like, everything I see is fucking green. Lime green, with purple tinges on the edge. I can also see my arteries. “Wow, this is fucked up,” I comment. This is actually the first time I've seen this while being in control of my mental facilities. “Everything is green.” Shining Armor doesn't let me look at myself for very long. “That's too much! Are you trying to drain yourself before you even get started!?” he bellows at me over the roar of my magic. I look up at him, my eyes narrowing, and a twisted grin forming on my face. “Is that what you truly think? Or are you just trembling in...argh...dammit,” I say, clutching my face. It's really hard to stay in control. I can feel the insanity there, and if I stop focusing for even an instant, it comes forth. Thankfully, it has a tell. The closer it gets, the more pain I feel. If I suppress it, the pain goes away. “Ignore that...it's difficult to control. How do I use less magic?” “Control the flow passing through your magical core. Think of the core as a funnel; it's up to you to control the size of that funnel!” Shining Armor advises me, ignoring my burst of insanity obligingly. Hm, that actually seems like a good mental image. I understand that controlling magic is mostly mental, if the old books I used to read are accurate (which they weren't at the time, but it gives me a decent basis to go off of). Mental images should work in some form or fashion. I picture one of those adjustable funnels getting slimmer and slimmer, and I feel it coming into effect on my magic. I continue picturing this until the hole at the end of the funnel is small indeed. When I open my eyes again, the magical aura around me is much fainter than before, appearing as a kind of smoky wind circling around me, instead of a roaring black inferno. “Much better. Now then, your magic feels stable to me, so I'm going to assume that this is your base. The term 'base' refers to the lowest amount of magical power one can emit with shutting the flow entirely,” Shining Armor explains. “In the future, I'd like you to practice staying in at base for as long as you can, preferably on a daily basis. Once you can stay in this form without spending too much magical power, take it up a notch. These are the basic endurance exercises that every unicorn goes through.” So basically hold my Super Saiya...I mean magic for as long as I can. Funny little joke there. Yeah, my brother and I watched the shit out of that show. Anyhow, moving on. “Next, I'd like to see how well you can regulate the flow of your magic during basic combat maneuvers,” Shining Armor dictates. His horn lights up with a gentle magenta, and two logs float over to us from a small pile in one corner. Seemingly spending no effort, Shining arranges the logs so that they are standing on end, one on top of the other. Now it's a construct that's about as tall as I am. “Break the upper log, but do not damage the lower one.” Okay, this reminds me a lot of Blue Exorcist. Only there's logs instead of candles. Whatever. This should be simple enough. I remember having overwhelming power back when I fought the Scorpios, so breaking a log should be easy. Striding up to the logs, I pivot my right shoulder back, and them slam my fist into the upper log, fully expecting the log to shatter. Instead, pain shoots through my fist and I recoil. “Fuck! What the hell?” I curse, glaring at the unharmed log, and then at my hand, which the darkness is currently swirling around. Where'd all that ridiculous power go? “I said regulate your power, not completely suppress it! How are you supposed to break through a dam with but a trickle?!” Shining Armor snaps at me. I scoff. “What are you talking about? I'm in my base form or whatever! How am I supposed to stay in base form and still harness enough power to do anything?” I demand, annoyed. “Think, Rogers! I told you to go to your base for one reason. Tell me what that is?” Shining Armor returns, unperturbed by my reaction. For some reason, he's not harping on me for a lack of respect. Hopefully it stays that way. A typical drill sergeant would tell you to “watch your tone” or some shit. “Because I'd drain myself dry before actually doing any real damage,” I state dully. I feel like I'm being schooled like a damn freshman. You gotta love being made to feel like an idiot. “That's right. But how are you to inflict any damage by only releasing a miniscule amount of magic?” Shining Armor points out. He has a point. There must be some trick to doing this. “All right, let's try this again,” I grunt. It would do wonders for my ego if I could rediscover that crushing power I'd shown before. I rush back at the logs, releasing my full magic power once more, darkness erupting from the ground around my feet with a roar. The magic wreathes my body in a malevolent light, and this time, as I draw my fist back, I'm sure I'll obliterate that fucking log. My fist rams into the log again...and this time it only cracks. An incredulous and frustrated huff escapes my lips. “Are you kidding me right now? I ripped a scorpion thing limb from limb, and now I can't even break a damn log?” “Better, but you're not focusing your magic! What's the point of concentrating your magic on your whole body if all you're going to use is your fist?” Shining Armor critiques me, and I recognize the sense in his words. Despite that sense, I growl in frustration. I kicked ass before...it's bullshit that I can't do so now. “Okay, genius. How do I focus my magic?” I retort, powering back down to my base. I'm getting annoyed with the way he's treating me. I mean, he said he was going to be like this, but that doesn't mean it's not pissing me off. It seems like every time I make progress, he's yelling at me about something else. “Concentrate. Feel the magic within you. By definition, magic is an extension of your own spiritual being. You are your own magic. Calm yourself and reach within your being; the magic will respond naturally to your will,” Shining Armor coaches me. He demonstrates by lifting a hoof, which begins to glow magenta. Well, that tells me a grand amount of nothing. He basically just told me, “Nah bro, it's fine. You just have to want to.” Of course I fucking want to do this. If I'm going to learn magic, I want to be awesome. Why can't I get some bullshit Deus Ex Machina powers or something? After standing there with my eyes shut and straining like a dumb fuck, I come to a conclusion. Mental pictures are what have gotten me this far. Maybe I'll use another one to help me through this. My eyes narrow, and my power blasts out of me again, only this time, a large amount of it is concentrated around my right fist. With a grunt of exertion, I hit the log again, and this time, an explosion of darkness and green electricity ensues at the point of impact. “Yeah, take it, you dumb log!” I cry exultantly as pieces of the log scatter across the floor, charred black from the magic. Shining Armor glances at my handiwork, unimpressed. Just as I'm about to yell at him, I notice him staring pointedly at something in front of me. I turn, and then I almost faceplant on the ground like an overreacting anime character. I broke the lower log as well, which I was specifically told not to break. Fuck this... The next two hours feel like eternity. Shining Armor doesn't give me even a moment to rest. He's a harsh taskmaster, that's for sure. I get one word compliments when I do well (which isn't often) and harsh berating when I fuck up. That aside, I do discover a few things. It turns out I don't know how to do all the techniques I'd used before while the magic controlled me, like the fast movement and rifle attacks. So basically I'm nowhere near the level I had been when I'd fought Celestia. I don't get a chance to try and learn them back during this training session either, as Shining Armor is intent on seeing me learn how to fully control my magic. He has me do several exercises like the one with the logs, where I have to destroy one thing, but not another. Other times he orders me to concentrate my magic in strange places, like my foot or my chest. “Magic is defensive as well as offensive, all at the same time. Wherever you concentrate your magic, you'll find that you'll take less damage in that area,” Shining Armor explains, after I question his methods. Well, I guess that explains how Celestia's laser didn't blast right through me. By the end of the two hours, I'm completely drained of magic, having used every bit of it in my attempts to learn how to use it. I'm currently resting on all fours on the ground after a particularly bad fuck up, sweat pouring down my brow. “All right, we'll stop here. You're coming along nicely, Seth,” Shining Armor says after a moment of regarding me. I notice he's calling my by my first name again. His tone is also more amiable. I guess he switched off his drill sergeant mode. “We'll make a unicorn out of you yet...er...so to speak.” “Hah...goddamn, I'm tired as hell,” I gasp, pressing a hand to my chest. My heart is racing, as if I'd just come off of a treadmill. Shining chuckles, and then he offers me a hoof to help me rise. I take it gratefully and climb to my feet. “So how long does it usually take for all of my magic to come back? “It really depends on how much magical power you have. You actually have a great deal of power at your disposal, as well as a deep level of potential you haven't touched upon yet,” Shining Armor analyzes, giving me an approving look. “In your case, I'd say you can use your magic again in a few hours.” “Oh. Well I shouldn't need it anyway,” I reply, nonplussed. So he says I can be really strong. I wonder what it would be like if I'd had this power back in my time. I think I'd be unstoppable, if I could use magic to buff myself defensively. “Right. Now then, I have a patrol to run, so it's time I escort you out of here,” Shining Armor tells me regretfully. I figured as much. Being one of the top members of the military must keep you busy, after all. “All right, lead the way.” He and I depart the guard barracks the same way we came in. Walking back through the courtyard, I glance up at the sky, noting that the sun is past its zenith. So if I had to guess, I'd say it's around two or three in the afternoon. Shining Armor leads me to the doorway leading back into the castle interior before stopping. “It seems I must take my leave of you. I'm looking forward to seeing how you develop,” the captain expresses with a friendly smile. “Make sure you do those endurance exercises I told you about.” “Yeah, okay. Have fun doing your patrol or whatever,” I tell him. With a nod, Shining Armor goes back towards the barracks, leaving me alone. Huh. I guess he's not all that bad. Bit of a prick while training me, but he gave me a disclaimer for that. I think I like the military, if I just get treated like another soldier and they don't attempt to be my friends. As I walk back into the castle, I realize I have nothing left on my agenda. Finally. Now where the fuck is Rainbow? I would like to spend the rest of today with her, if possible. I walk into castle, intent on finding the way out. I take about five turns before I realize I'm completely lost again. Goddammit, fuck this castle's design. How long do ponies have to work here before they figure out where everything is? “Seth?” Upon hearing my name, I turn my head to see Cadance trotting towards me, smiling. Great...here comes miss carbon copy of Twilight. “Didn't you have some diplomatic meeting or something to be at?” I groan. God forbid I get out of the fucking castle without meeting anypony I know. “I do, yes, but the negotiations don't occur until later this afternoon,” Cadance answers. She comes to a halt just in front of me. I notice with a slight wince that the fact that she's even near me is causing the other ponies walking through the halls to notice me. They're all giving me strange looks as they pass us. “Anyway, I was actually hoping to run into you before you left the castle.” “Why? What do you want?” I say tiredly, not really in the mood for conversation. I'm still wiped from the training. “Do you enjoy listening to music?” Cadance inquires, somewhat randomly in my opinion. Where the hell did that come from? “Hell yes I do,” I reply truthfully. Good musicians were the only humans apart from my friends and family that I actually respected, as their creativity and skill spoke to me on an emotional level. Hell, I used to play the piano as well. I fucking love music. That's why I always wore headphones with me wherever I went. You have no idea how sorely I'm missing my usual soundtrack. “Why?” “Good! You see, the Royal Canterlot Orchestra is performing late tonight at the Grand Theater, and I was wondering if you'd like to go see them with me,” Cadance offers. I blink once. Then twice. Did the fucking Princess of Love just ask me out? What the...that's fucking sudden. Not to mention unwelcome. I open my mouth to tell her exactly what I think of her offer, and then I stop. Perhaps I should make sure that's actually what she's after. “Why would you ask me? You hardly know me,” I demand, hoping that I'm just misinterpreting this. Rejecting a princess could go very wrong, very fast. “Well, I was going to go with my coltfriend, but he's busy with the guard tonight, so I have an extra ticket,” Cadance explains, levitating two silver tickets in the air just in front of me. Wait, coltfriend? Is that...oh thank god, she's not asking me out. That would have been bad. I mean, I assume coltfriend is the pony equivalent of boyfriend. Even so, I'm not going. Royal Canterlot Orchestra? It sounds like it would be a blast to go see them, since I love a good orchestral piece as well, but it also sounds super expensive. I'm not letting her give me a free pass in. I don't care what her reasons are. “That still doesn't answer my question,” I point out. I literally just met you today. Why hand me a ticket worth who knows how much? There's no way I'm her second choice after her boyfriend. “There must be a million other ponies you know better to invite. Why me?” “You're right that I don't know you very well. That's part of the reason I'm asking you. After all, you're only in Canterlot for a few days, right?” Cadance answers candidly. She glances around, and upon noticing that we're standing in the middle of the hallway, she beckons to me with a hoof. Where the hell are we going? “So on a whim, you ask a random stranger that just happens to be a human,” I reiterate as we walk down the hallway. “I don't buy it.” “What do you mean?” “Are you sure that this invitation has nothing to do with the fact that I'm human? Or that it might be beneficial to you to have a human in your debt?” I accuse her. Cadance looks appalled at the suggestion. “What? Of course not!” she protests, looking flustered. I can tell that's bullshit, so I narrow my eyes at her. “I mean...I'll be honest. You're human, yes, and that's fascinating. As a history nut, I want to know more about you, but can you really blame me? Ponies have only heard of you in stories or legends. Is it so wrong to be curious about the species upon which most of our culture is based?” “We're really going to do this right now?” I say, rubbing my forehead. I'm really not in the mood for a fucking sermon. Cadance doesn't back down, though. “Dammit, what a pain in the ass. Look, I'm not talking about my kind, and there's nothing you can say to change my mind. So you can take your ticket and...” “Wait, do you think I invited you out only because you're human?” Cadance interrupts me before I can finish my rude statement. I nod at that. Cadance sighs. “That's not what I meant. I respect that you don't want to talk about humans, so I won't pry. However, you shouldn't judge me for being curious.” “Get to the point.” “There's more to somebody than just their species. I want to get to know you as an individual, as you seemed like you have a lot to say back in the garden,” Cadance continues. As she keeps talking, I'm looking at her suspiciously. The things she's saying sound good, but I'm not entirely sure if she means them. Cadance looks at me and smiles. “I should be allowed to make a friendly gesture without being judged for it.” “You certainly talk a good game, I'll give you that,” I admit. I'm beginning to understand why she handles matters of diplomacy, especially if she can speak logic to strangers like she is to me. “But tickets to a fucking royal orchestra seem like they'd be expensive. I don't have the money to pay you back, and I certainly don't want to be in your debt.” “Oh, I didn't pay for these,” Cadance reveals. I blink and look at her oddly. You're going to tell me that tickets are free too? That's bullshit and you can't convince me otherwise. Cadance giggles at the look on my face. “I won them in a raffle at the restaurant where I ate lunch today.” Apparently it's not bullshit. Welp, I feel like an idiot. But wait, something else doesn't make sense. “At a restaurant? Doesn't the castle have private kitchens? Why the hell would you eat elsewhere?” “Yes, we do have kitchens, but sometimes I want something simpler. Our chefs have a tendency to make every dish a gourmet meal,” Cadance admits with a grin. “I frequent a small sandwich place in the outer edges of Canterlot, and this time I got lucky. Free tickets, can you imagine?” “Huh. Well, if they're free...” Why do I get the feeling I'm going to regret this? “I guess I'll go. When is it?” Cadance makes a little “squee” sound (I swear, if I keep hearing that fucking sound, I'm going to start using it as a verb) and passes one of the tickets to me with her magic “Yes! You'll enjoy this, I promise. The orchestra is amazing. All the details are printed on the ticket itself.” I look down at the ticket. It's made of a slick silver material that I can't identify, and on it is inscribed a bunch of small letters. Which reminds me. I look up at her with a deadpan expression on my face. “Cadance,” I start. “I can't read.” “Oh! My apologies, I didn't mean to assume,” Cadance gasps sheepishly. She looks down at her own ticket and starts reading the details off to me. “Admit one, VIP seating. The concert starts at eight pm tonight at the Canterlot Grand Theater.” “Thank you. Well then, I guess I'll show up. I hope they're as good as you're making them out to be,” I remark, annoyed that once again I had to be read to. The second I get back to Ponyville, I'm setting up appointments with Cheerilee. “They're better. I just know you'll love them,” Cadance responds gleefully. Just as that conversation comes to an end, I notice we're just passing by the front entrance to the castle. This'll be a good opportunity to get back to the city. I want to find Rainbow. It's odd, but I feel like it's too quiet when she's not around. “Yeah, let's hope so. Anyway, I'm leaving now. I've still got some time to kill before this concert,” I express. Cadance stops walking as well, turning to look at me. “All right. I should be getting ready for the meeting, myself,” Cadance replies. With a nod, she turns back the other direction and starts walking away. “Meet me here tonight then?” “Sure, whatever. Make sure the guards know to let me in.” I reply, and then the two of us part ways. She heads down a hallway that leads deeper into the castle, and I walk through the castle gates and back out onto the drawbridge. Once I pass through the front gates, I'm back in the city proper. The next thing I want to do is find Rainbow. I have no idea where she is, though. Turns out I don't have to look at all. I'm only walking for a few seconds before a rainbow flash descends from the sky and lands on the ground just in front of me. That makes things easier. “Sup, Rainbow?” I remark, but then I notice that she looks rather worried. Like, really worried. To the point of being slightly angry. “Seth! There you are. What in the hay were you doing up there?!” Rainbow demands frantically, stepping closer to me. “Uh...talking to the princess? I told you about that, remember?” I remind her, crossing my arms. Tell me she's not going to be like Twilight and get all pissed because I took longer than expected. “I know that! I'm talking about that spectacle all the way up the mountain! The entire city could see that!” Rainbow snaps. She seems to be calming down slightly now that she's seen me. “Really? And what makes you think that was me?” I ask, just for the sake of curiosity. Rainbow does a little growl at that, but to me it just seems overly cute. “I'm not stupid, Seth. I was there in the forest. I know what your magic looks like!” she tells me accusingly. “Yeah, you got me. What's the big deal though? As you can see, I'm fine,” I say, shrugging. Rainbow's expression grows angry, and for a moment, I think she's about to hit me. Thankfully she doesn't. “What's the big deal?!” Rainbow yells, but then she forces herself to calm down, letting out a sigh. “I thought you were in trouble....but I couldn't get to you. The pegasus guards wouldn't let me get close.” While she says that last sentence, she lowers her head, looking a little forlorn. Hold up, she tried to fly to me during that whole fight? She'd have gotten herself killed, especially since I was insane at the time. But......I'd be lying if I said I didn't appreciate the thought. Just like Luna rushed to her sister's assistance, Rainbow was trying to rush to mine...just like...agh, I shouldn't over think this. She was probably just...actually, I don't see a single reason why she would rush headlong into certain death for my sake. Rainbow...I don't know if you're genuine or not, but thank you. Of course, I'm an ass. So instead of saying something grateful, I decide to tease her. “What, were you worried? How sweet.” Rainbow shoves me backwards, but not overly hard. I can't help but laugh. “N...not a chance! I just wanted to make sure you weren't making a fool out of yourself in front of the royalty,” she protests, but I can tell she's lying, and it's funny as hell. “But seriously, what the hay happened? Were you fighting somepony?” “Yeah, actually, and it's one hell of a story,” I confirm. For a few seconds, I debate on whether or not to tell her. Eh, fuck it. She's supposed to be my friend, after all. I tend to be slightly less lazy in the presence of friends. “Want to hear it?” “Heck yeah I do!” is her expected response. So, standing there a few meters away from the gate, I tell Rainbow the full story. Though I skip over most of the bullshit parts, like dealing with Elegant and the guard. Rainbow's eyes become wider than fucking dinner plates when I give her the rundown of the fight between Celestia and I. I leave out most of the details, because I'm not comfortable telling her anything about Janna, because she'll probably do that thing again where she'll force me to tell her about it. I do tell her about the things I supposedly said while insane, like how I wanted to take Celestia's throne. Rainbow pays rapt attention to me the whole time I'm talking. “That's crazy...I mean, you did act rather nuts when you were fighting the Scorpios, but I didn't think you'd say such crazy things,” Rainbow gasps after I finish describing the fight. “You're telling me. I'm too lazy to run a country,” I remark. That causes her to roll her eyes. “You're sure you got that magic under control?” Rainbow asks me, giving me an uncertain look. What, is she going to abandon me if I say no? “Pretty sure. I can turn it on and off at will now, and still remain in control of my mental facilities,” I assure her. Rainbow heaves a relieved sigh. “That's good. I remember it hurting you a lot when I saw you use it,” she expresses, and then she smiles at last. Wait, that's what she's worried about? “Really? That's all you're going to say? You'd think you'd be a bit more freaked out by the fact that I attacked your princess.” “You said yourself, you weren't in control. Besides, a little dark magic isn't going to take down Celestia. It's no surprise you lost so badly,” Rainbow explains reasonably. “I suppose. Anyway, Celestia is sending a trainer or something back with us to Ponyville. Some pony from the 2nd Unicorn Regiment or whatever the fuck they call it,” I respond. Rainbow's being very chill about all of this. You'd think she'd either get super pissed or afraid that I attacked her princess. Or you know, worried about the fact that I could possibly kill her without warning if I lose control. “Oh sweet! That sounds awesome!” Rainbow reacts. Seconds later, a grin crosses her face. “Wait, you said that you were fighting with Celestia in midair. Does that mean you can fly?” “I mean, I think so. Since regaining control, I can't remember how to do any of my techniques. Maybe I'll eventually be able to,” I say pensively. I can't help but get a little excited, thinking of how it would feel to just soar in the sky. Humans have been dreaming of flight since our conception. That's why we have airplanes and such. “Yeah! You need to remember, and then you can come flying with me!” Rainbow exclaims happily, her body perking up. “Yeah, okay. Learning how is the difficult part,” I remind her. This doesn't dampen her enthusiasm, however. By that, I mean she promptly takes to the air and executes a few random twirls in the air while whooping. “Why are you so excited, anyway? Don't you have other pegasus friends you can fly with? Like Fluttershy, for example.” “Fluttershy? Are you kidding me? She's one of my best friends and all, but she can't really keep up with me,” Rainbow brags, swooping back down and hovering just next to me. “Neither can most pegasi, for that matter. I am the fastest flier in Equestria!” And she's bragging again. I hate it when she does that. Part of me is hoping that if I do learn to fly, I can get faster than her just so I can knock her ego down a few notches. “Right, you said that already. Except for the Wingbolts, or whatever they're called,” I grunt. I'm fairly certain I fucked up their name. “It's the Wonderbolts, Seth. They're the coolest flying team to ever exist!” Oh god, why did I mention them...every time I do, it sets Rainbow off into fangirl mode. Suddenly, Rainbow gasps. “That reminds me! I need to show you the Wonderbolts Gift Shop!” “Ugh, I suppose you won't be happy until I agree,” I groan, though it's halfhearted at best. She's been wanting to go there with me since the moment I invited her to the city. It's not like it'll cost me anything. “All right, I assume you know the way.” “Yeah, now you're talking!” Rainbow exults, and then she takes off the other direction. It takes her about five seconds before she realizes that I can't keep up with her speed. She touches back down on the ground and falls back to my pace, looking sheepish. “Sheesh, you need to learn to fly already.” “Oh, I'm sorry if I'm too slow for you,” I retort sarcastically. “I didn't think I'd be living in a land of magical ponies, so I didn't really exercise that much.” “That settles it! When we get back to Ponyville, you're going with me on my daily runs,” Rainbow declares. “Can we not do that? Your runs are brutal,” I complain, remembering how I'd been winded in half a second the last time she and I went on a run. “No they're not, you're just weak!” Rainbow teases, jabbing a hoof at me. She and I start walking through the Canterlot streets. She walks slightly in front of me so she can lead the way to this gift shop or whatever. “Everyone is weak compared to you, miss Hercules,” I shoot back, realizing only a moment later that she probably has no idea who Hercules is. “Miss what?” Yup, that's what I thought. “Skip it. The point is, it's not really fair to use such an exemplary example as yourself as the standard for who's weak and who's strong,” I explain. Rainbow blinks, confused. “Uh, I don't really get it, but you're calling me strong, right?” “Oh for the...yes!” Despite my annoyed tone, I can't help but chuckle at this whole exchange. Rainbow joins in as well. And this is why I wanted to spend time with her. It's never boring. After a pause, I decide to bite the bullet and ask. After all, I need to know something about these Wonderbolts if I'm going to a shop dedicated to them. Let's just hope I don't regret it. “So, I've been meaning to ask. You keep talking about these Wonderbolts, but what exactly are they?” I start. Rainbow's face lights up, and she opens her mouth. “And before you start, keep it succinct. I'm not looking for a Twilight lecture like you did last time.” “Uh, you did not just compare me to Twilight,” Rainbow deadpans, her brow set in a flat expression. “I did. What're you gonna do about it?” I tease her. Rainbow gives me a sideways look, and then points a hoof at me. “Watch yourself. I'm going to prank the hay out of you when you're not expecting it,” she warns me. Oh yeah, I still need to get her back for waking me up by suffocation the morning we traveled to this city. “Yeah, yeah, sure. So, Wonderbolts?” “They're only the coolest team of fliers ever! It's a widely known fact that only the best of the best get into the Wonderbolts, because they're Equestria's best...” Rainbow begins, but I cut her off impatiently. “Rainbow, I get it. They're the best fliers. But what are they? Stunt fliers?” “Uh...not really. They're more than that. I heard they're mostly military, but I don't really know the details,” Rainbow admits. I look at her in disbelief. “So you're a huge fan of them, but you don't really know a thing about them, do you?” I can't help but laugh at that contradiction. Rainbow immediately becomes indignant. “You know what? Just because of that, I'm buying a Wonderbolts history book at the gift shop!” she shoots back. “Knock yourself out.” I say uncaringly. Rainbow glares daggers at me for a few seconds before she loses her composure and chuckles. I guess I'm going to this gift shop. Sounds like a total snore fest to me, but I don't really have anything else to do until tonight. I might as well humor her.