Twenty-Six
Hands
A My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
By Andrew J. Talon
DISCLAIMER: This is a non-profit fanbased work of prose. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the property of Hasbro, and the reinvention of the lovely Lauren Faust. No copyright infringement is intended, please support the official release.
- - - - - -
I peeked out the hospital door, slowly scanning back and forth. I held my side, focusing on anything other than my aches and pains. I had to get out, had to get home... Whatever kind of home that might be. I had visions of the Changelings building me a hive. Or Twilight making something obsessive compulsive inspired. Or Fluttershy making me a tree...
Actually maybe that wouldn't be too bad. But Chewy could get the jump on me from above, like he had that one time he invaded the library.
The coast was clear, so I began limping out. I leaned against a nearby wall, and grunted.
"Oh man... It feels like I haven't moved in months," I muttered. I heard hoof clopping and I grimaced. I limped as fast as I could to the nearest door, and slid in. I pressed my back against the wall and slowed my breathing. The clopping went past, and I smiled.
"Heheheh... Sucker," I muttered. I looked out the door... And frowned as I saw that Nurse Redheart was standing guard just outside my door. "Aw man..."
"It's like she expects you to try to escape," said the room's patient. I looked back and saw an older mare with a curly magenta mane. I held my finger to my lips.
"Shhh," I hissed. "You want me to be caught?"
"Well," the mare said with a sensual smile, "you could always... Convince me to keep quiet. Though I might make some noise."
I stared in silence at her. I then looked to the door, back to her... And finally my gaze rested on the window. I limped over and looked out the window. I looked back.
"What kind of tree is that?" I asked.
"Oak," the magenta mare said. "Probably very uncomfortable to land in-"
"I'll take it!" I said, gripping the windowsill and slowly sliding down. I held onto the sill and measured the distance carefully. I took a few deep breaths.
Now let's think about this logically, I thought. Is it really worth risking myself to make sure my house isn't built by a mix of my marefriends, an alien queen who likes to screw human beings over, and Pinkie Pie?
I thought about it some more... And let go. I landed on a bushy branch, and gripped it. I hung from it, and pain jabbed in between my shoulderblades.
"Gah!" I groaned. "Okay... This is making me rethink this... A lot...!" I bit down on my lower lip, and looked to the nearest branches. I shuffled along the branch, ignoring the leaves scraping against my skin. I gripped the trunk, and very slowly I slid down. Gritting my teeth the whole way down.
"Nngh... Grar... Argh... Ow, ow, ow..." I muttered. "Owww...!"
"Ahem," went Nurse Redheart. I looked over my shoulder. The white pony was standing there, tapping the ground with her hoof with a disapproving scowl. I smiled despite my intense wince.
"Ah... Would you believe I'm just going out for some fresh air?" I asked.
"Maybe, if I was drunk," Redheart said. "Besides, Berry Punch ratted you out. She didn't take you turning her down very well." She sighed. "She never does..."
"I see," I sighed. "It was for a good cause though! I want to avoid my house becoming a horrific maze of alien sadism and cruelty!"
"So rent an apartment," Nurse Redheart said dismissively. "Come on, let's go!"
"Oh, fine," I sighed. I slid down to the ground on unsteady legs. "Can I at least have Jell-O?"
"Yes," Nurse Redheart said with a smile. "It'll even be the blue raspberry kind."
"Ooh, that's great," I said cheerfully. "That'll be-"
"RAWWWWRRRRR!" And I was suddenly thankful I had gone to the bathroom before my escape attempt, as the familiar form of my Manticore flew down. Nurse Redheart shrieked as I was gathered up in large claws, and I was pulled up into a stinky, furry embrace.
"Bwah? Chewy?!" I gasped. "CHEWY PUT ME DOWN! HEY! LET GO!"
The manticore ignored me, and I was soon going for a ride through the sky, the nurse's cries fading behind us as we flew for the mountains in the distance.
- - - - - -
"CHEWY! CHEWY!" I shouted over the wind caused by the beating of the manticore's wings. It was a loud fwump, fwump, fwump, and frankly I couldn't hear myself screaming at him. "CHEWY! PUT ME THE PUS SPEWING HELL DOWN!"
I shrieked and swung my fists against his furry chest. The manticore didn't seem to notice and he just kept flying on. I looked down and instantly regretted it-I could see the Everfree Forest far below, becoming darker and more threatening in the fading sunlight. I'd already gotten more than enough with it at night. Especially when the only thing I had on was a hospital gown.
"CHEWY! YOU PUS FILLED INFECTED BAG OF NAG DROPPINGS!" I shrieked. Chewy still said nothing, save for a little growl. He brought us down, holding me away from his chest. And wisely, he held me away from his balls.
Yes, I have honor but there is a limit to it. I'm a lying, cheating monkey with a kick ass magic unicorn and that's why I'm alive.
... Okay, the power of love helped.
At last we began to descend, his mighty wings beating faster to compensate. We swooped down into a clearing in the dense forest, and Chewie set me down. I stumbled, but I managed to stay on my feet. I turned around and glared up at Chewie. He came in for a landing, fluttering down like a bat. He kneeled, and growled at me.
"You are a fucking bastard, you know that?" I shouted irritably. "I'm already in enough trouble with Twilight as it is and...!"
A manticore growled. I blinked as Chewie's expression became far more terrible than before. I turned around and saw the source of the noise-Another manticore. Bigger, fiercer looking... And with eyelashes?
"Eh?" I intelligently asked.
Chewie growled something. I looked back at him in utter disbelief.
"You kidnapped me so I could meet your girlfriend?!" I hissed. Chewie growled, and moved onto all fours. He nose bumped me forward. I looked back at the female manticore with a strained smile. The fear was secondary. I was in pretty severe pain from my not entirely healed injuries.
"Ah, hey," I said. "I'm Andrew Shepherd. Chewie's told you about me, I trust?"
The female snarled. I winced and brushed off a bit of saliva from my face.
"That was a yes," I observed wryly. "Well, this has been nice but-"
Chewie made some motions to me, and whimpered. His lady snarled. My jaw dropped.
"You want me to what?! Make her obedient?!"
The female manticore roared. I staggered back, and looked back at Chewie. "What the hell are you-WHAT?!"
Chewie growled, and shrugged. He pointed at me, and hissed something about Twilight and Fluttershy. The gist of it was that he thought that I was in control of my mates and thus he wanted me to control his mate for him. I covered my face with my hand.
"... Really? You really, honestly think I have any control over my women?" I asked in disbelief. Chewie nodded. I sighed, and sat down on the log. I rubbed my temples.
"Look," I said. "Winning your mate isn't about controlling her. You don't just turn her into your slave."
The female manticore nodded. Chewie gaped, and growled in disbelief.
"No no, she's going to do her own thing and you're going to do your thing," I said quickly, hands held up. "The key though is that you've formed a partnership. She gets her way some of the time, you get your way some of the time! It's cooperation!"
Chewie tilted his head with a quizzical expression. He growled a question.
"Well of course I do stupid things! But I do love them," I said. "It doesn't mean you just do nothing though. You stand up to her, but that doesn't mean you own her!"
Chewie snarled, pointing at my house in the distance. At the house I didn't have any say over in the construction of. At the house my marefriends were building for me...
"I ended up out of control because of you, Chewie," I said flatly. "It isn't that compelling an argument." I looked to the female Manticore, who was watching in curiosity. I sighed.
“Look, I know he’s an idiot,” I said. “That’s been established from day one.”
Chewie growled. I held a hand up.
“That said,” I continued, “he is a good guy. He’s my friend, and he can be a moron at times. But give him a second chance… This is his first time.”
Chewie’s jaw dropped, and he growled in embarrassment. The female manticore’s eyebrows rose. She then… Well, purred is too generous a word. Kind of a rumbling grind, really. Chewie’s eyes widened. I smelled musk in the air… And suddenly felt incredibly awkward.
“Well,” I muttered, getting up. “I’ll uh… I’ll leave you two to-BWAH!” I leaped forward, dodging the female manticore as she pounced on Chewie. I looked over in some concern for my manticore. I then blanched, and hobbled away. Chewie yelped for assistance, mewling like a scared cat.
“Yeah buddy, should have thought about that before you dragged me out here in nothing but my hospital gown,” I muttered, shivering against the night.
- - - - - - -
For once, the Everfree Forest was not a horrible death forest. Everything had been driven off by Chewie and his lady friend. At least, that's what I surmised given I was able to stumble through the trees without being attacked.
I did nearly get run over by a Rex, but it was too busy running from the horrific sounds of manticore coitus.
"Gah... Ugh," I muttered. I saw the lights of a house through the trees, and I smiled. I leaned against a large branch I was employing as a walking stick. I didn't know what house it was. For all I knew, it was the cabin of some nefarious witch that would devour me.
That this did not frighten me was probably a good sign of severe blood loss or that I was just used to this kind of thing by now. For a world ruled by cute magic ponies, it was kind of a death trap.
"Argh," I muttered, leaning more heavily on my walking stick. I made it to the grasslands, the moon shining down upon me. I could see the lights shining in the windows more distinctly. They were rectangular and wide, looking out over the Everfree Forest. And judging from the trees, I was on Sweet Apple Acres.
I frowned as I limped across the field. "This looks very familiar... In a... In an utterly unfamiliar sort of way."
I could make out more details of the house as I got closer. The lit windows were in a boxy treehouse. Below it was a brick building, shaped like a ring. There was a door in the middle, and as I stumbled up to it I saw... Something that was surprisingly moving.
"It... Its my size...?" I mumbled. I could hear music inside, and voices, and the laughter of ponies. My hand shook a bit, and I gripped the doorhandle. I pulled it open, just a crack. I leaned over, most of my weight on my walking stick. I peeked inside.
The house inside was rather spartan, but the floor was smooth polished wood. The walls were expertly plastered, and painted in a dizzying rainbow of colors. There were forests and mountains and rivers... And crude paintings of humans. One was being finished up by a certain pink pony, who then filled my vision. I fell back.
"Ack! Pinkie Pie!"
"Hey Andrew! You're alive!" Pinkie Pie said cheerfully. "That's good! Everypony will be happy!"
"Uh-"
"Especially Fluttershy!" Pinkie Pie grabbed my sleeve by her teeth. She yanked me into the room. She dragged me through the brightly painted walls into the center of the house. "Mmm! Come on!"
"How do you talk with that in your mouth?" I wondered. Pinkie smiled and shrugged her shoulders.
"Mmph hmmph!"
"Oh come on!" I said angrily as I was dragged into the central room. "That's just ridiculous!"
The laughing and partying quieted down as I entered. I saw Twilight Sparkle hunched over a wooden table, maps and hammers scattered all over it. Rainbow Dash was by the record player with a hardhat on her head. Applejack had a paintbrush in her teeth, goggles on her eyes and a banana tied to her back. Rarity had mussed hair and a frilly chainsaw, as well as a scale model of the building we were all in.
"... Seems you guys had an interesting day," I commented.
"ANDREW!" Twilight cried, leaping forward and tackling me to the ground. "Oh you're alive! You're alive!"
"Ow... Ow...!" I groaned.
"Not for long," Applejack commented dryly.
"I was focusing on casting a location spell!" Twilight explained. "But it involved some considerable effort from everyone else... And a few odds and ends..."
"Can I please stop this?" Rarity begged. "My hair is wailing in agony right now!"
"Yes, go," Applejack said. Rarity was gone in a flash, the bathroom door slamming behind her. Dash rolled her eyes.
"She's got such issues... I liked my part in the ritual!" She smacked her hardhat and giggled. "Hey Applejack! Can I keep this hardhat?"
"No," Applejack said flatly.
"Aw come on!" Dash whined.
"No."
I stared at Twilight intently.
"... Dare I ask what Fluttershy was involved in?"
"Well," Twilight murmured, casting her eyes to the side, "she wanted to be alone..." She smiled. "But I think she'll be fine with you interrupting."
I nodded and hobbled after my trotting marefriend. We ducked into a side door and went down a short hallway. We reached a door painted bright blue, with pink butterflies tracing a path from one corner to another. The yellow sun shone above the stylized insects. Twilight knocked on the door.
"Fluttershy! Andrew's here!"
There was a gasp, and the sounds of several things being moved around. Then, the door cracked open. A single blue eye peeked out.
"Oh! Oh, g-good!" Fluttershy cried with a smile. "Come on in! I... I just finished! Almost! G-Give me a second!"
More sounds of movement and work reached our ears. I leaned on my walking stick a bit more heavily. Just to rest, really.
Twilight looked up at me. "You feel any kind of... Dread?"
I smiled back. "Why would I? What could this be? My bedroom? That might be stressful, but..."
Twilight shook her head and scowled. "You've been hanging out with Chrysalis again I see..."
"No, but she did visit me in the hospital," I said. "In the form of a naked woman from my planet."
Twilight scowled. "Again?"
"She did live on my planet... Tried to invade it..." I shrugged. "I have a weird life, but I think I've gotten used to it."
The door opened. Fluttershy, in sexy naked human form, smiled warmly at us from inside the room. The bright blue painted room.
The bright blue painted room with a crib, a changing table, and numerous toys.
The bright blue painted room with a crib, a changing table, numerous toys, and a heart shaped bed?
"Uh... What?" I muttered.
"What?" Twilight muttered as well.
Fluttershy smiled. "Well... Um... You said you wanted to start a family... And Chrysalis suggested that to make things more efficient we start the family in the same room as the nursery..." Her face turned red. "I um, I forgot to mention I made a nursery..."
I stared at her for a very, very long time. Utterly silent.
... Probably a lot longer than I needed to but can you blame me? No! No, you cannot.
- - - - - -
I have a confession to make: When I'm confronted by danger, destruction, possible death? Manly kind of things? I become someone capable of focusing on the most minute details. I can think and plan and make instant decisions under threat of imminent doom. The shy, awkward archaeologist whose last job was charitably called "blue collar" becomes a warrior. Andrew Shepherd, the Last Human. I can live up to that name so long as people (or ponies) I care about are in trouble. I don't always win, but I sure as hell don't stutter, stare or freeze up.
"Andrew...?"
"Andrew!"
I blinked rapidly, and shook out my head. I had developed a headache in the last few seconds, and staring at Fluttershy's human rack was sadly not helping. I looked to Twilight: She was wearing an expression of confusion, anger, hurt...
I looked up at the ceiling. No, no help there. So I fell back on the other stereotype of humans I'd helped bring to Equestria: That we can be a bit slow.
"I'm... Sorry, what?" I asked. Fluttershy frowned.
"You... You know," she began, her wings fluttering in nervousness, "how you wanted to start a family? With me?" She looked to Twilight and smiled. "And Twilight, if you are so inclined?"
"Fl-Fluttershy, I... Andrew...!" Twilight took a moment to collect her thoughts-Far faster than I. "You want to have foals?! Now?!"
"I-" I tried to get out, but Fluttershy cut me off with a smile.
"Y-Yes! Isn't it wonderful, Twilight?" She asked eagerly. "I-I mean, I've always wanted to be a mother-"
"But now?! Why didn't you think to consult with me first?!" Twilight demanded, growing angrier. "Do you really think I-I'd just be okay with it?!"
Fluttershy shied back, a frown marring her pretty face. Her eyes darted to and fro. "I... Andrew was so insistent on it... And it's something I wanted... I-I just thought you'd... You'd be all right..."
"W-Well... Not-Not now!" Twilight exploded. "Not right now! I mean, you're ready to just get-get knocked up right here in his new house and you just assumed I'd be all right with it?!" She turned her furious glare on me, and I shrunk back. "When were you going to tell me?!"
"I... It's kind of complicated," I said, stalling. Twilight growled.
"Summarize," she hissed, her horn glowing with repressed magical power.
Now, I knew Twilight would never seriously hurt me. Intentionally. As in, that being her only intent. But after the kind of day I'd had, I was on the edge. I was just too frightened to think through things. So I blurted it all out.
"I don't want kids, right now, but I told Fluttershy that starting a family was something humans did when they moved out just to make her feel better about me getting my own place," I babbled. There was silence. I looked up to Fluttershy's face, and immediately regretted it. My chest hurt just seeing the shocked and dismayed expression on her face.
"You lied?" She whispered.
"No! No, I-I did not lie!" I tried. "I-I just presented the facts in a certain-Certain way and-!"
"And let her down easy? Make her think you wanted foals? Make me think that, too?!" Twilight demanded. She loomed right over me, and I realized I was on the floor. That pain in my chest was getting worse, and I groaned as I leaned over. "Because I can't believe that you'd really...! Really...! Andrew?"
"Oh... God," I muttered, falling over.
"Andrew! ANDREW!" Twilight shouted.
"I'm... Right... Here," I muttered back, wheezing. I had no idea what was going on, nor why I was blacking out... But I could only imagine Nurse Redheart would have some cutting remarks for me.
Assuming I lived that long. And right now? I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to...
- - - - -
I was no stranger to weird dreams. Whether it's an effect of being exposed to real magic, an alien world, my homeworld being invaded or just the cleaner air; my brain has been on a roll for the strange and bizarre once I fall unconscious.
And given how often that happens, I've almost gotten used to it. Almost.
The roiling, twisting tapestry of Earth spread out underneath me. I could see the Sahara Desert, the great blue of the Atlantic, the frozen upper reaches of Canada and the verdant jungles of the Amazon. I could see my home state of Colorado, with the Rocky Mountains I'd grown up seeing far below. I felt tears come to my eyes, and I'm not ashamed to admit that I was moved by this view.
I reached out to my home... And could not touch it. I scowled and reached out further. Still it eluded me. I waved my arms about but I had no ground to stand on, nothing to kick off of.
"If this is just going to be a bad pun about not having a leg to stand on, I'd like to wake up please," I muttered. A peal of laughter rang out over the Earth, and I looked up. I scowled as Chrysalis floated before me with a smug grin.
"Does your entire race just have to be quippy in times like this?" She asked. "I found I could keep up with a conversation provided I just saw enough of your movies and TV shows..." She then shrugged, "or their IMDB quote pages."
"Are you actually here or are you just here to torment me more?" I asked flatly, crossed my arms over my chest. "Because I'm going to put a quota on it."
"Perhaps I'm here as the Devil to tempt you out of your Eden?" Chrysalis suggested, and now she was in her sexy human woman form. She floated up to me and batted her eyes, quite deliberately pushing her breasts up with her arms. I rolled my eyes... After a good look. Give me a break here, all right?
"All right Lucifer, what are you tempting me with?" I asked. "After all, those aren't exactly real." I reached out and pointed at her boobs. She scowled.
"They're as real as I want them to be, thank you," she hissed. I goggled at her in disbelief.
"Are you actually insecure about your appearance-?"
"No! I can change it at will, why would I have any sort of body image issues?" Chrysalis asked flatly. I stared at her for a bit, and I decided to try a sudden thought that occurred to me.
"Unless you can be insecure about getting the illusion wrong," I surmised, rubbing my chin in an unnecessarily thoughtful fashion. Chrysalis bristled, her eyes glowing green in repressed anger.
"Do you want my help or not?" She snarled. I held my hands up with a disarming smile.
"All right, all right... Help away."
She continued to scowl but she at least no longer had the eyes of doom. She nodded, mollified for the moment, and she cleared her throat.
"Given your species' love of abstract representations of concepts in dreams, it only seems fitting you'd get this sort of imagery," she said, waving a hand over Earth. "And your own particular brand of sadomasochism."
"If you mean I enjoy being tortured by your wonderful company, you're spot on," I snarked right back. Chrysalis shook her head.
"No, no, I mean that you are torturing yourself with this sort of thing," Chrysalis said. I gave her a disbelieving expression.
"What do you mean?"
Chrysalis sighed, and rubbed her forehead. I felt a growl form in my throat.
"Don't act like I'm stupid! I'm not!"
"Just a moment," Chrysalis said. Her aura flared into being around her, and a second later Twilight popped into existence next to me. I started and gaped at her.
"Twilight? How did-?"
"Chrysalis!" Twilight cried. "What the hay are you doing in my coltfriend's head..." Her eyes narrowed. "Dressed like that!"
"I brought you in to help, Friendship Instructor," Chrysalis simpered. "After all, you have some major issues if Shepherd here is running around the forest in a hospital gown-"
"I was kidnapped," I responded in an exasperated tone.
"And you are driving him to faint," Chrysalis pointed to Twilight. She shook her head. "And since time is far more fluid in a dream state, I decided to get this resolved as efficiently as possible. I'll let you resolve things, then bring in the Flutter one. Ta~." And she vanished. Twilight and I looked at each other. Then, away from each other.
"So... That's your home?" Twilight asked. I looked back at my marefriend, as she gazed upon the spinning globe below us. I sighed and nodded.
"Yeah."
"It's beautiful," Twilight said softly. She smiled over at me. "I... I can see why you'd want so badly to get back."
I stared down at Earth, thinking. I worried my lower lip. "I..."
"I mean, your friends, your family," Twilight said. She sighed. "It makes sense why you wouldn't want to... To set down roots here." She looked up at me. "After all, we're aliens..."
"Twilight, that's not true," I protested. I reached out to her, and rested my hand on her head. "Alien is... Is the last thing I'd call you, after so long." I looked deeply into her eyes at this, and was rewarded with just a hint of a blush. "But... There's this feeling I get about Earth. A feeling I've gotten ever since I learned about the Changelings and the war..."
I looked down, away from Twilight's compassionate eyes. She reached out her hoof and lifted my chin up so we once against shared our gaze.
"What?" She asked. I sighed deeply.
"... Shame," I admitted at last. "All my suffering, all my stubbornness, I... I think a lot of it is just because I feel..."
"Guilty?" Twilight pressed. She looked at me with suddenly watery eyes. "Oh Andrew..."
"I can't help thinking maybe, in some way, if I'd been there..." I waved my hand. "I... I might have made a difference. I could have helped." My own eyes were wet, and I tried to look away from Twilight. She wouldn't let me though, and I choked back a sob. "I might have... I-I mean, I don't even know if my family is all right... Or my friends and... And..."
And that was it. The waterworks were finally out. When I cried, I just let go in a huge dam. I bowed my head and wrapped my arms around Twilight's neck, bawling like a baby into her neck. She sniffled and shook in sobs of her own, and her hoof stroked my shoulders.
"Shh... Shh..." Twilight whispered. "It isn't your fault, Andrew... It isn't your burden to carry..."
"I... I know that, I know that... Up here," I got out between sniffles, tapping my head, "but... But here..." I felt her hoof on my heart, and I was wracked with harder sobs. "It... It hurts so much... And..."
"And so you... You punish yourself?" Twilight asked in horrified comprehension. I closed my eyes... And nodded. "Andrew..."
"I-I mean... Part of it... I guess..." I admitted shakily. "And it... It isn't you, but I feel so happy here... I honestly do... And I feel... I feel so guilty about it..."
"Andrew," Twilight said softly. She kissed my cheek, and pushed me back enough to look me in the eyes. Her own were red with tears, but she had a gentle smile on her face. "All this time... I..."
"I wanted to be strong, Twilight," I sniffled. "I... I had to be. I mean... If I was going to be the last human, I... I wanted to be the best human I could be. I wanted to be the best person... A person worthy of you, and Fluttershy... Of-Of everypony." I cried a bit harder. "B-But... But I feel like... Like all I wanted to do was make up for my guilt! My shame! I... I...!"
"You," Twilight said firmly, "you... You are a hero, Andrew. You are a kind, giving person. You have nothing to feel ashamed of."
"But... But my motivations-" I tried, but Twilight shook her head. Tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Motivation? Andrew... Andrew, would you have made all the same decisions you have if you were motivated by... By pure goodness? By pure decency?"
I stared at her. I wiped my nose, and looked down. The Earth still spun below us, as it always did and always would. "I... I think so..."
"Then what matters is what you've done, not what you feel in that... That dark place inside you where your fears lie," Twilight said softly. She kissed me, and nuzzled my cheek. "You've done so much, and mean so much... And yet you still doubt that you're a good person. That... That you deserve to have happiness."
"Well... Back home, I was never..." I sighed. "It's something all humans feel... Maybe something everybody feels, but I felt like... Like I had no future. No purpose. That I needed to be someone, I needed to know that I was... I was worth something."
"You are, Andrew," Twilight insisted. "Why would we go to all this trouble for you? Why would we act so much out of love? Why..." And here her blush returned in full force. "Why would we want to have your children?"
I stared at her in shock. She huffed.
"Don't... Don't act surprised," she said. "I... I see my mother, and Princess Celestia, and how they taught me and raised me and..." And here she smiled. "And I want to be just like them. I want to bring someone up in the world, and give them a wonderful life." She kissed me again, and sighed softly.
"And... And I want you to be the person I choose to do it with me," she said softly. "I would never ask that of anyone I didn't truly want that from."
I was silent for a long time, save for a sniffle or two. I hugged Twilight more tightly, and sighed into her mane. She sighed with me, and I just listened to her heartbeat.
"I... I feel like such an idiot," I admitted softly.
"It's one of your less endearing traits," Twilight responded quietly. "But... The other ones? They more than make up for it."
This time, I kissed her. She hummed against my lips, and I held her more tightly. This miasma, this clenching feeling of doom and despair I'd felt... It was almost all gone. All from the realization I had been incredibly stupid.
I suppose Oscar Wilde was right: Experience is merely the name men gave to their mistakes.
"Now now," Chrysalis interrupted, "save that for later." and I felt a scowl on my face. It wasn't mine, it was Twilight's. And I shared her expression as we looked up at the Changeling Queen.
"After all," she continued, "you have another mare to apologize to, do you not?"
"You said time was meaningless here," Twilight pointed out. Chrysalis sighed.
"Yes, but I feed much better when your romantic feelings are being expressed in the real world," she said. She coughed. "I mean... Fluttershy is waiting."
"Nice save," Twilight said sarcastically. Chrysalis chuckled.
"You have been learning from him! Good..."
- - - - - -
Twilight and the Earth faded from view, which left me hugging nothing but empty space. I released my arms, and looked up. A white sheetrock wall appeared before me, spreading out like wildfire over dry grass. The sheetrock became hardwood floors, and more walls appeared around me. Furniture, in the form of a white coffee table, an old couch with a southwestern geometric pattern over it, and lamps in each corner of the room all came into being. Paintings done by a local artist my father and mother had known from my elementary school depicted scenes of canyons and rivers and fields we'd run across on family vacations. The sun shone through a broad window onto a tall Christmas tree which was covered in lights, garland, and familiar ornaments. I walked up to the tree, and touched one of the artificial branches. I looked out the window onto a painfully familiar street, and I sucked in a deep breath. All the smells came rushing back: The oil of work boots from my last job on a plastic shoe dock by the front door. A hint of lilac from the plug in air filters my mother loved. The smell of the Christmas ham we cooked every year...
"I'm home," I murmured. I reached out to the wall, for support more than anything else. "Mom? Dad! Ben!" I called. I ran up the stairs to check the bedrooms: Nothing. I went back down, through a kitchen set for dining and a dining room set up for guests with pictures of our vacations on the walls and the family china cabinet standing in austere glory. It all rushed back, it was all just as I'd left it... But nobody was home.
Aside from the one person who shouldn't be there.
"Fluttershy," I said softly. She was still in human form, but no longer naked. Rather, she was clothed in the yellow sweater and green skirt she'd gotten from the human archives in Canterlot. She looked up from the antique tea set on the dining room table, and stared at me in some awkwardness. I averted my eyes for a moment too... But I steeled my courage and looked back. I was pleased to see her matching my gaze, though she was still sad.
It's hard to describe just how sad she looked. Honestly, it may have been my personal bias or the fact we were in a dream state but her beauty... It would break the heart of anyone watching.
"Andrew," she said. She looked around, and smiled. "This is your home?"
"Ah, yes," I said. "I was born on the eastern coast of my country, and we moved out here for my dad's new job when I was five."
She looked over the table and ran her hands over some of the artifacts sitting atop it. She held up a tea cup and studied it, before moving on to an ammonite fossil we'd gotten at a rock shop in Estes Park. She walked around the table, just searching, before she rested her hands on the worn, white covers of the family Bible.
"Bib... Ell?" She read. I smiled.
"Bible," I pronounced properly. "It's the holy book for my religion."
Fluttershy eeped, and drew her hands away. I held my hands up.
"No no! It's fine, go ahead. They've printed like a billion copies at least."
"Oh," Fluttershy said. She opened it, and gingerly flipped through the pages. She stopped at the first few pages in confusion, before she smiled in realization.
"Your family tree?" She asked, pointing to the pen marks and lines that drew out my family. I walked around the table to stand by her, almost touching her. She didn't pull away, but I couldn't put my arm around her shoulders. I instead pointed out the names of my family.
"Yeah, this Bible's been in my family for about four generations. My great grandpa, Homer, bought it back in the 1920s from his boss at a sawmill," I said, pointing out his name. "His son, my grandpa George kept it and gave it to his oldest daughter, my mother, on her wedding day. And she added in my dad's side of the family, too. See? This is my great uncle Andrew, who I'm named for, and my great-great aunt Carolyn, and my great-great-grandfather Eustace..."
My fingers traced the inked lines, as I kept going all over my family history. Fluttershy just watched and listened.
"... My cousins Ricky and Derek, they live in North Carolina. My second cousin Sandra, she became a fashion designer and lives in San Francisco, my uncle Danny, he's a lawyer in Georgia and won a lot of cases against insurance companies back in the day..." I at last found my parents, and I swallowed with a suddenly dry throat. I felt Fluttershy's wing against my shoulders, and I took a deep breath.
"My dad, Doyle, went into the Navy and became a nuclear engineer," I resumed. "My mom was a librarian at the local college. They met at a friend's party, thinking the other was their blind date. Turns out they weren't, but it was perfect timing. They got married a year later, and after that, they had me. Two years later, they had Ben, my brother." I pointed out his name. I chuckled a bit. "We always fought over everything. You name it, we disagreed over it. We even made sure to vote differently when we turned eighteen..." I sighed, and lowered my head. I looked over at Fluttershy, and my jaw dropped. Her eyes were full of tears, even now falling down her cheeks.
"Fluttershy? Oh I'm... I'm sorry, I'm sorry Fluttershy," I said, hugging her immediately. "Please, don't cry..."
"No, no," she said softly. "I... I'm sorry. I'm just kind of... Confused." She looked up at me, and sniffled. "I mean, I-I was confused, but now I'm not so..." She took a deep breath. "You miss your family dearly."
"I... Yeah, yeah I do," I said with a nod. Fluttershy sniffled.
"And you want them back."
"... I'd love to go home, yeah," I admitted. "See them all again. But you know," and here I tried to smile at her playfully, "you make a very compelling reason for me to stay."
"That's what I was afraid of," Fluttershy admitted with a sigh. I frowned and held her tighter.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean... If you do make a life here, with us... With me," she said, "and a family... You wouldn't return to Earth. Not if you had to make the choice." She looked me in the eyes, and I was hit by just how deep her eyes seemed to go. I felt like I was getting lost in them. I worried my lower lip.
"... It would be a tough decision," I admitted. "But I... I couldn't leave you. I couldn't leave our children. What kind of guy would that make me? An irresponsible jerk, that's who."
"And that's what I'm afraid of," Fluttershy said softly. "You having to make that choice, and staying with us, and... And never going home again." She sighed again, and hugged me around my waist. I hugged her back. "How could I live with myself, knowing I made you choose? I'd feel so selfish..." Her eyes went back over the family tree and she bit her lower lip.
"I never had a family like this," she said. "I never had connections like this. My parents were very isolated, very independent... They insisted on having me home schooled, they didn't let me have friends until I went to flight school. I was... I was so alone, and all of this is just..."
"Hey, hey," I said consolingly, rubbing her wings, "Fluttershy, if I do have a family with you, it's cause I want to. And if I get the chance to go back home, I... I'm going to want to stay here. I'm not going to resent you for keeping me here. You make me happy! Twilight makes me happy!"
"And yet... Would one part of you continue to suffer?" She asked. "I mean... Some part of you be unhappy?"
"Hey, I'm almost always unhappy," I said dryly. At her wide eyes I shook my head. "I'm kidding, kidding! But seriously." And here I smiled. "You know, that stuff I said about going out and starting your own family? Your own household? That was true, I wasn't just making it up. And the fact is... I do want to build a life here. Hell, I've helped save this world. Back home I'm just some frequently unemployed archaeologist." I cupped her cheek and smiled warmly. "I'm always going to miss Earth... But I'd miss you more."
Fluttershy's face brightened, like the sun rising. She kissed me, and slammed up against me. Which sent us both falling to the floor.
"Oof!" I grunted. Fluttershy broke the kiss, her cheeks flushed bright red.
"Ah, sorry, I'm so sorry," she said quickly. She kissed me again. "Mmm... So sorry..." She licked my lips. "I'll... I'll make it up to you," she promised in a deeper, more sensual voice. My pupils dilated, especially when she rubbed herself up against me. In terms of build, the best I can do for comparison of Fluttershy would be... Well... Leanna Decker. And trust me, the fact I had not lost my mind over her yet was something of a miracle.
But that voice, combined with that body form, combined with the intimacy of the moment... Well...
Let's just say it was a very, very good dream from then on.
Afterwards, as we lay together on the couch, cuddling, she sighed and nuzzled my neck.
"Mmm," she hummed softly. I played with her hair, letting the pink strands drift over my fingers. I chuckled softly and kissed her forehead.
"Haa... Dream sex is great sex," I decided.
"Mmhm," she purred. "Though... Um... I'm hoping to do it again when we wake up."
"Sure," I said happily.
"I just hope the potions Zecora gave me work," she said.
"Ah... What potions?" I asked. Fluttershy blushed.
"Um... Fertility potions. Adapted for my human form," she said. "I-I mean... She said I'd have to be in this form for at least nine months-"
"Ah," I began, "Fluttershy... About... About starting a family now..."
"Yes?" She asked, smiling radiantly. So kind, so open... So happy. And my words, like a taunting bully, came back to me.
"... Are you completely sure this is what you want?" I decided to ask, stalling a bit. Fluttershy nodded.
"Mm..."
"Being in an alien form for nine months? I mean... Having my baby? Shouldn't we get married first?" I asked. Fluttershy immediately blushed bright red, but she smiled all the more radiantly.
"I... I suppose, if it's what you want, we can," she said softly. "It might be a bit of a scandal, um... But I-I don't mind..."
"Ah... Well..." I scrambled. "Can we at least ask Twilight first?"
"All right," Fluttershy said with a smile. "We can. I'm sure she'll say yes. And then..." And she sighed happily, and nuzzled up against me. "And then~... Ohhh yes." She looked up into my eyes. "If you... If you are all right with it... Dad?"
Maybe I was being foolish. Maybe I was making an impulsive decision. But when you're in love, those kinds of decisions are easy to make.
"Okay," I said. “I’m happy to do it with you… Mom.”
Fluttershy beamed, and hopped up on top of me. "Ah! Fluttershy?" I gasped.
"We-We need to practice, and time is meaningless here," she said. "Right?"
"Ah, I-I guess," I said quickly. "But I thought Chrysalis said..."
"Oh, go on you two," Chrysalis spoke. I started and looked to my right. The bug queen herself was sitting in my dad's easy chair, flipping through the Bible.
"Hey! I thought you fed better when it's real!" I said quickly. Chrysalis smiled.
"I do... But I needed to run some errands while you were out and I let things go on. Besides," and here she smirked as she waved her hand. Twilight appeared, bound, gagged, blushing and wide eyed. "She likes to watch."
"Oh... Oh my," Fluttershy murmured. That said... She didn't stop.
And I was really in no position to stop her, anyway...
- - - - - -
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This is actually very, very good. A good look at a human mind stuck on an alien planet, romance and family with a good bit of comedy. Nice to have you back.
Welcome back to writing, AJT. And interesting way to end this chapter...
Well well well
This seems like one could make some great clop out of this.
Been a while since you last updated. But this chapter was worth the wait. Part of me kind of wishes you show the lemon scenes though.
So worth the wait. Who knows, perhaps this fic will become meta stable.
3661454 If anyone wants to write lemon scenes for this fic, by all means, go for it.
Have you been reading one... no, two of my stories?
Interesting... dream sex with Fluttershy. Twi's turn next, right?
Andrew's breakdown... wow, that hit me, hard. SO worth the wait.
Oh shit he's so lucky xD Chrysalis I think actually helps things for them, they should be nicer to her xD
OMG you're back!
Too bad I have to go to work now and can't read the chapter for about half a day.
Twilight appeared, bound, gagged, blushing and wide eyed. "She likes to watch."
and it good to see u back
lol my head hurt from laughing so hard
Am i the only one who didnt trust this being an actual chapter when getting the notification?
Great
Im a bad Boy,I got my christmas present early,And i opened it....Great chapter
wouldn't this mean that the baby would be anthro-ish if not human? she may have to stay in that form longer after it's born.
oh my god it updated
HA, one of the biggest character building chapters yet and it was incredibly good
You are awesome, sir. Don't ever forget that.
Wait, how did Fluttershy gain the ability to go human again? It's been a while, and I don't feel like rereading the previous chapters.
Hahaha
Reading this chapter was the icing on my day. Brilliant.
WOOHOO an update! I have been daydreaming about this fic and making up stuff to pass the time for so long, so happy to see it updated!
I wonder when the spin off of this is going to update as well......
Glad to hear that life continues to feed the madness
Woo, it updated! Now, what've we got here?
...
Manticore sex (which was hilarious), followed by dream sex with Fluttershy, then some more while Twilight and Chrysalis watch.
This doesn't surprise me in the slightest, and I'm not sure if that says something about me, or this fic...
Sod it, the chapter was great and I'm glad to see more of your work being put out.
Glorious.
When that she-manticore started purring, for a half-second I thought she'd start putting the moves on poor Andrew, sort of like that episode of "Futurama" where a female of Zoidberg's species falls in love with Fry.
*insert scene of all the mares fawning over stallion-Andrew*
P.S. Will Andrew ever harness the power of song and music?
I did a double take so fast when I saw this story had updated I almost gave myself whiplash.
Love it!
Only one slight typo Applejack had a banana tied to her?
Ahhh good to see ya still kickin' Andy
Just personal opinion here, but it seems bad that they have to have a human form for him to accept them as romantic partners. Like he cant accept them for who they are. Will his kids need to be in human form for hi to love them?
It's no PS4, but this will do for now
you and your not-clop clop. it's done so perfectly
What the heck. I have no idea what happened... This chapter does nor line up with the previous one. And I don't remember Chrysalis being in this story....
Chrysalis is still an evil b*tch and I still hate her with every ounce of passion in my body.
But aside from that, great chapter!
Why a great story, complete with kickassness and softheartedness a perfect mix too!
3663436 they need to be in human form for genetics to work, his love for them is not affected by their form.
Well worth the wait!
While regular updates are exciting, better take your time as you need it.
We, your readers, aren't going anywhere.
3664461
I want to debate this but I can't recall how much of the stuff from the spacebattles threads wasn't posted here. I think there's a chunk of material for Chrysalis' redemption arc that was put up there missing from here. (I don't think it was written up in full chapter format but parts of it were put together outlining the events. I also can't recall where in the timeline it would occur.)
But the main point you need to remember is that Chrysalis only really came to power after the invasion of Earth. Prior to that she was incredibly low on the totem pole. So she's not really accountable personally for that invasion, although I would agree that the changelings as a whole do need to make some sort of reparations to humanity, but that isn't possible at the moment for numerous reasons including the lack of contact with Earth. And her crimes against Equestria are being dealt with in the Pony Way which encourages redemption over retribution and seems to be working in this case. So she is paying for her crimes, just in a more community service form and with Twilight as her parole officer.
3663156 Looks like it was part of the ritual they were about to perform to locate Andrew
3664178 Wasn't it the whole thing in earlier chapters that he was very uncertain of being in a romantic relationship with Twilight until she showed him her human form? I like his character but his need for them to be in a form that isn't theirs strikes me the same way as someone forcing their romantic partner to where a mask or paper bag during sex. I know that its more complicated than that, its just how I feel about the human thing at a more basic level.
To offset the criticism I will say the dream with Twi where he admits his feelings of guilt was very touching.
It was great, amazing, brought tears to the eyes. Love your work, thank you so much for writing and sharing!
Dammit I wanna hug Andrew.
Twilight, Fluttershy, LISTEN to him and stop twisting his words around, lest I smack you both with a tractor trailer!
Dat ending tho...
Deserve more, sure you could say that, though with a story as good as this I don't rightly care what I deserve so long as it stays this brilliant
Good chapter, I like how you are slowly resolving some of the issues he might have been feeling. I would probably be feeling pretty homesick if I was stuck on an alien world and most definitely a little guilty if I felt more like staying there then going home after spending a good deal of time there. Its nice to see some more positive character growth.
Thanks for the present. It was great.