The ponies had partied well into the night, but Ted was still exhausted from the days events. Knowing he may have to do it all again the next day left him more than willing to head to bed early. Those he passed in the halls were rushing to join in the festivities, though a few seemed to be more interested in private parties, if some of the looks that were being fired around the temple were any indication. Shaking the mental images conjured by such sights, he made his way to his own chambers, intent on seeing this day finished.
Just a few rooms before he reached his destination, he came across Gleam, leading a small group of about four foals. Most tried hiding behind her as he approached, but one came running up to him. Rose came to him, hugged his leg, and wished him goodnight. 'Blast, Rose 3, Ted 1' He thought to himself, leaning down to nuzzle the little filly.
"Can I stay with you?" She asked. It was surprising, all things considered. The filly had spent most of the previous day hiding from him, now she found him perfectly safe?
"I can't Rose, I have something I need to do tonight. There's someone I need to talk to. I have some questions to ask her that may help us all. I met her when I was sleeping, and if she scares me while I'm sleeping you may get hurt, ok? Now, why are you so willing to hug me all of a sudden?" He asked her, smiling at her pout.
"Miss Gleam said you told her to watch us. She also said you kept the food ponies safe so we could have something to eat." Hugging tighter to his leg, she said "Thank you Mr. Nightmare." before scampering back to her caretaker. Wishing her sweet dreams, he didn't notice the confused look on her face, though he did hear her ask Gleam what a dream was. 'That's right, Luna said ponies haven't dreamed for a long time. Maybe she knows why that is.'
Arriving at his chambers, he took a quick glance around before struggling into bed. Two days as a horse hadn't made him any less awkward in some movements. The room was a lot cleaner than it had been when he left it earlier, though considering the mess, that wasn't saying much. At least he didn't have to worry about staining the bed sheets red, or having something squish while he got comfortable. Laying on the bed, he wondered what he would play tonight.
<-(0)->
'I am a ninja. I am invisible. They will not notice me.' Hefting his weapon, Ted smirked, eyes concealed by an odd mechanical looking Viking helmet. 'Until it is too late!' Whipping out of cover, he unleashed hell upon the dirty REDs, rocket after rocket flying towards his targets, sending many a RED bastard to their death. The last rocket, glowing with an ethereal blue glow, struck several of the enemies, showering the area with body parts.
"Welcome to the United States of YOU JUST GOT DOMINATED!" He shouted, adrenaline surging through his body. His allies moved forward, hoping to capture the first point when the fastest of the group screamed in terror, an electronic chirping pre-empting a hail of bullets that were impossible to avoid. Signaling his pocket, Ted reloaded, before rushing around the corner, his body becoming encased in a solid blue energy. The four turrets, stuck so close together it made him want to cry, were useless against his invincible form, and were quickly demolished, along with their caretakers. Before he could reload a second time, he heard a loud chime, followed by a voice from one of the many speakers around the area.
"We have captured a control point!"
Grinning, he charged forward once again. The reds didn't stand a chance. He turned the corner and-
The next thing Ted was aware of, he was back in his teams base, wondering what had happened. He'd blown up the turrets, turned the corner and...
...red spiked balls. Oh, that damnable one-eyed bastard would pay for that.
The fighting had stalled, leaving an absolute meat-grinder of a kill zone for both sides, neither able to press an advantage long enough to do anything, be it push the BLU's back or take the RED's final base. Just as Ted was thinking of ways to break the tie there was a shout from above. He turned to see the small dark alicorn once again showing up in his dreams. He smiled, thinking to himself 'Awesome, just the pony I wa-' before the Australian to his right was struck by a lightning bolt. Confused, he looked back at the alicorn, and all he saw was hatred.
"You thought you could lie to me, that you could hide behind that alien form?" The lunar alicorn shouted, tears in her eyes. "You cannot hide your aura, the magic that flows through you even in your dreams! You thought that I would be brought low by your lies a second time? Never! I will exact revenge upon you, for hurting me, for hurting my subjects, for hurting MY SISTER!" Luna screamed, mane flying wildly in an arcane wind, dark clouds forming around her while her eyes glowed with power. "LIAR" She shouted, launching a true shadow blade that neatly bisected a nearby team mate. "DECEIVER!" She screamed, launching a second blade that furrowed the concrete at Ted's feet. "PARASITE!" She accused, firing a stream of arcane fire at him,
Ted ducked back behind a door frame, muttering obscenities to himself. 'Ignoring the glow, it's just an illusion anyway, why the hell is she so angry at me? When did I lie to her, or hurt her sister? Why would she attack me all of a sudden?' His cover was struck by three more bolts of lightning. 'Oh hell, aura? Humans don't have magic so the only magic I have would be hers and the Nightmares. And since she's not running up to me to hug me and call me her son, I'm guessing she's thinking I'm the latter.' He frowned. 'I may know why, but this is my dream, dammit. You don't come running into my dream trying to kill me!' Swinging out of cover once more, he aimed his weapon at the other alicorn.
"I'm coming for you, wizard!" He shouted, firing a salvo at the flashing ball of rage.
"Everybody, attack ze vizard!"
Suddenly Luna was under fire from both the BLU and RED teams, as they shouted nonsense at her.
"Oh my god, I hate wizards SO MUCH!"
"Your magic is weak, old man!"
"RUSSIAN TOOTH FAIRY HAZ COME FOR ALL YOUR TEETH!"
Tired of the idiocy, she prepared a gravity bomb, intending to crush the insolent creatures.
"Lookout, he has a book! He's going to read!"
The princess almost lost hold of her fury at the absolute stupidity flowing from the creatures mouths, but managed to launch the spell, capturing four of them and crushing them to nothingness. Turning to the remaining fools, she noticed the Nightmare was missing. 'No, impossible, it wouldn't run from a fight, so where-'
"Always in the last place you'd look."
Her search was cut off as a piercing agony made itself known between her wings. Turning, she saw the Nightmare once more, this time with a stub of a horn showing through his blue balaclava, his wings twice as large as they were last time, barely clearing his shoulders. The next thing she knew, she was ejected from the dream, tumbling in the void of the dream realm.
<-(0)->
Once more Ted found himself standing in an endless void. To say he was angry would be incorrect. No, he wasn't angry, just frustrated. The princess was one of his best chances at figuring out most of his problems here, maybe even knowing if it was possible to return home. Sure he wasn't a god or demi-god or whatever role alicorns filled here back where he was from, but surely his sister needed to know at least. Would his mother still be alive after forty years? Would she believe him if he said he was her son? Or had she accepted the Nightmare as her son? Was the planet even there anymore? What if the Nightmare had destroyed the earth? Based on what he knew of it, that would most likely be its goal.
He shook his head. If that was the case, the blasted thing had almost four decades on him to fulfill it's plans. He just hoped the earth was still there if he figured out a way home. Looking around himself, he was about to start another game when he noticed them. The void wasn't one anymore. There were small lights nearby, like Will-O-Wisps floating near him. Four more were off by themselves but close enough to see; two of them close by, a third near those, and a fourth off by itself. No, the fourth wasn't by itself, but the fifth was so weak that the two were indistinguishable from each other. What was this? Where did they come from? Perhaps the inhabitants of this plane sensed him. He had no real training with this dream realm thing besides what little he could glean from broken memories, so if something attacked him here he would be a sitting duck.
As quickly as it came, his paranoia left. One of those closest to him seemed to be calling him. Leaning closer and reaching for it, he found himself in a small cabin, tidy and cozy, a small fire burning in the hearth. He heard a pony nearby, and wishing he was in his alicorn form, found himself to be wearing that form a moment later. Not a second too soon either.
Trotting in with a tea kettle was Gleam, humming happily to herself. She looked at her unexpected guest, smiled, and asked him "Good evening sir, would you care for some tea?" At his nod, the unicorn levitated the kettle over to the fire, before heading back to the kitchen, returning with a tray of crackers. "I'm afraid I haven't had much time to bake lately, I've just been so busy!"
"It's fine Gleam, I'm glad to see you enjoying yourself. Tell me, is this your first dream?"
The unicorn giggled at him. "Oh no, sir, I've had dreams before, when I was a little fi-" Suddenly her smile died on her lips, and her eyes were wide open. "B-but, we don't dream anymore." She stated, looking around the cabin. Looking back to Ted, she said. "I don't understand."
'Neither do I, honestly, and my only possible source on alicorn magic and dreams is currently trying to kill me.' It would most likely be best if he pretended to not understand the question, though. It would avoid the uncomfortable questions for now. Smiling, he answered another question. "Don't understand what? Why this is a dream, and not a nightmare? Tell me, would you be able to watch Rose and the others if you didn't sleep tonight? Would those foals want to stay here if the first dreams they ever had were nightmares? No, Gleam, the nightmares are for my enemies." His smile deepened, showing off his irregularly sharp canines. "Our enemies."
The mare seemed to consider the answer, before nodding. Turning to the tea kettle and levitating it off of the fire, she looked back at her guest. "Could I interest you in some tea?"
<-(0)->
It was impossible. She refused to believe what she was seeing. Walking up to it, she reached out a hoof to the orb. The world shifted, leaving her in a green field with four ponies in it. One was a little filly, dancing and prancing happily around two others whose faces seemed blurred. The fourth was the Nightmare. Well, what she assumed its alicorn form looked like. It sat off to the side, watching the filly as she jabbered happily to the two unknown ponies. Did the little filly not realize the danger she was in? The Nightmare was right there, it would destroy everything in moments. Before she could stop the green foal, it rushed up to the Nightmare, even going so far as to set its hooves against his legs to lift herself higher. The dark alicorn turned from its vigil, and while the outsider braced for the worst, nuzzled the filly and told her he would keep watching for the bad ponies.
Luna felt her rear legs give out watching the exchange. Sure it was a dream representation, but such a thing had to come from somewhere. The dream was near where the Nightmare was currently residing, on the other side of the planet from Equestria, so the filly most likely had seen the Nightmare at least once. Was it lulling her into a false sense of security? Perhaps Luna's presence stopped it from becoming a full fledged nightmare. As she was about to settle on the last, the little green foal noticed her, and running up to her assaulted her with questions.
"Oh, hi! Who are you? I'm Rose. Are you Mr. Nightmare's sister? You look a lot like him. Do you want to play?" The reference to being related to Mr. Nightmare left a bad taste in her mouth, but she agreed to play with the filly. She needed answers. The field wavered a bit, and a small part of it was suddenly a flat play-area with a small ball. The filly rushed over to the ball, before launching it at the princess, who caught it and returned it to the filly. It was a simple game, often used by young unicorns to improve their strength and reaction times, but it was always entertaining watching children play. Even at her darkest hour, children had brought her hope.
"So tell me, young one, where did you meet Mr. ahem, Nightmare?"
"Oh, some bad ponies brought some of us out to this really far place, one said we were gonna be snacks." She said, frowning slightly at the memory. The ball was forgotten in her grip, slowly drooping to the ground. "They tied me up and put a bunch of spells on me so I couldn't move, and brought me to him. They said he would eat me... but he didn't. He said they were wrong, and sent them away. He gave me some delicious toast with this amazing jelly on it, it was soooo good!" The filly rambled, her mood improving every moment. "Then I fell asleep hiding in his pillows and the next morning I woke up next to him, Miss Gleam said it was because it gets cold at night, and even though I was pulling his wing he didn't say anything, he just let me have some pancakes. Then he told Miss Gleam to watch us and he went to protect the food ponies. One of them said he fought this HUUUUGE snake! He was using all these cool spells and it tried to eat him and boom! He blew it up!" She shouted. Rose was practically dancing around Luna at this point. Suddenly she stopped, thinking about her current location and the words spoken to her earlier. "Hey lady," She asked, poking one of the princess' forelegs. "Is this a dream?"
Recovering from her confusion, Luna nodded.
"Are you the one he was going to talk to?" Rose asked "He told me he wanted to talk to somepony that could help him. That she showed up when he was sleeping. Is that you? Are you going to help him?"
The alicorn frowned. He had been preparing to ask her for help? After all he had done to her and her sister?
"Is that a no?" The filly asked sadly.
Luna turned to the young girl, smiling sadly. "The Nightmare hurt me and my sister a long time ago. He took many things from me, and he knows everything I do. He is very, very dangerous."
Rose looked at her, confused. "That's not nice. Mr. Nightmare is nicer than a lot of ponies I know."
Shaking her head sadly as she walked away, the princess looked back at the filly. "That speaks very poorly of the world we live in, doesn't it?" Before the unicorn could respond, the princess faded from the dream.
That part with the wizard made my day in more ways than you can imagine... also. Good luck with warframe. My ps4 still updating. T-T
'daw' there, you got it. And you earned it.
Oooh, very nice humannightmare story. And with such frequency of updates. Do not lose your muse. WRITE!
cf.chucklesnetwork.com/items/1/8/5/8/4/original/if-its-always-in-the-last-place-you-look-do-you-get-it-right-bef.jpg
Enjoying this, well done :)
Hmmm... When did she sense his aura? The only time she was near him was in his last dream and she was fine then, then she saw him this dream and instantly attacked... WTH?
I love myself some TF2. It's just so wacky and zany and the characters are so fleshed out for being morons. I'll just leave this here:
All of the favorites! And all of the upvotes! ALL OF THEM!
In all seriousness, this has been the most surprising and most welcome addition to my favorite list in a long while.
Very well done so far and eagerly looking forward to more
I enjoyed the reference but the turbo nerd in me is slightly saddened you used BLUE and not the true B.L.U. as it is in game.
It was cute. But i did not get feels from this chapter. Just cuteness.
5927626
Good point, maybe she needed to scan his dream bubble first and forgot to do that spell the first time?
5927432 Whoops
5928158
You...you think you can kill me!? Do you know how foolish that sounds? This flesh makes me strong; this flesh makes me immortal. You can kill my decoys, but you can't kill a god. Lephantis and Phorid gave me their secrets to regenerating a new body, and I gave them minions.
5927984 Well, poor Woona was alone for a very long time before their first meeting. She may have been a little desperate for company.
5927507
5927730 I'm sorry, it's been a full month since I've healed a 2fort match. If you see someone with this name on TF2, say hi, It's probably me. Never saw another Reykan on there.
5928158
5928182 Can you two take this to the Void or something? Alad's getting infested all over my story. Jack, stop encouraging him.
I think I'm honestly more curious now what the hell happened to Luna than in what's in store for the MC. Something really, really weird is going on there.
I'll admit I haven't heard that one. Love that tf2 reference.
5928955 Another thing that always bothered me in the MC in NMM's body stories I read was the MC had full access to god-like powers. He can have 'em, well, some of them, but he's gonna have to work for em. I also love the idea of someone going, "Oh, this looks right. Lets cast it!" and having it explode on him. Makes the spell weaker, yes, but also gives it an unintended utility.
I can only imagine a certain neurotic alicorn seeing his patched together spells. She'd have an aneurism.
From the wise words of Thor the thunder god, i say: ANOTHER CHAPTER!!! *smashes cup*
Well it's official, favorited! I'm really enjoying this story.
Well this kills the Idea that Luna would immediately start to help him. He'll probably end up having to reveal the fact that the Nightmare forced him into this position and he's as much as a victim of circumstance as much as Luna was, except he's in control of himself. Of course, this might most of the cultists to split from him, he'll save the ones that matter. That said, this does complicate things quite a bit and I hope that Luna realizes that this is not the real nightmare on her own real soon.
5928989
5929028 Booban is over-rated. Valkitty is my favorite. Nuthin' like tearing through the baddies like a bladed ball of rage.
5929056 You didn't think it would be that easy did you?
All the positive hype and speculation lets me know that I'm doing something right, thanks. I love seeing theories on my story.
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Someone needs to make a merasmus/Nightmare/Discord mod.
5929124 Well if it makes you feel any better the latest tactical alert sucked space balls.
5929535 what? False profit? I thought it was easy as balls :D All you needed was a trinity and a team that can simply 'not die'... or a conveniently locked room of course.
I can't stop laughing at the wizard bit.
well this is turning out to be a pretty fun story.
a little depre
...... instant like and follow!! I have to see if you come up with more gold like that!. made my whole night!
^_^well this is turning out to be a pretty fun story.
5930391 Alas, I can't claim that line, it belongs to Team Fortress 2. In fact, that whole scene is Team Fortress. Don't you dare try to tell me you wouldn't be doing something like that if you could control your dreams.
Rose gives the princesses orders.
Conspiracy theory ahead:
Rose is actually Fausticorn incarnate. She is helping ted as the nightmare to get good reputation, guiding him in times of need.
If alicorns won't listen, she will reveal herself as their creator in all her glory, and demand them to give ted a chance.
Makes perfect sense!
I gotta ask: is that a screenshot from Space Engineers you're using as a temporary image for the story? If so, awesome.
5930476 actually can..problem lies in also having Shiny-Syndrom (and not shining armor) so I have the attention span of a squirrel on crack on a good day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XNK2cPfEho
so I can never remember to try an pull them into my dreams..usually a lot more random, less funny and more "how much sprite did i drink to get drunk again?"
5930844 I'm not saying in your regular dreams. If you found yourself able to control them. If you thought something and it happened, like lucid dreaming.
5930051 I didn't say it was hard. Just that it sucked. Easily the most boring alert they've ever done.
5930853 I know, I have both normal (if they can be called such ) and lucid. and even the regular dreams I am still self aware and have complete control of 'myself' just not the BG or my allies (quit jumping into danger idiot!!!) and even a few de-ja-vu.
lucid ones I tend to go questing through the universe, or trolling *shrug*
an no, I don't have nightmares, havn't since I was a foal of 6-7. so nightmare moon nor luna would ever find me through my dreams if I was in equestria *evil grin*
5928975
Sounds like some of the potions I've whipped up in Skyrim. Ah! Waterbreathing! And it'll last for a ridiculous 700 seconds. But... it also saps your health or turns you into a gimp with a negative amount of resistance to magic.
I do look forward to seeing what's happened in the larger world. Granted, taking into account the vast distances between Ted (I laughed for awhile when you sprung "Tuna" on me) and the other princesses, seeing might be all that Ted/Mr.Nightmare gets to do. Teleporting could be a ways off while augmenting the ability to fly sounds a lot easier (and safer), assuming Ted ever figures out how to use those wings. Heh, how do birds do it again? Push the chick off a cliff and how for natural instincts to kick in? And if such base memories never surface, what then? Nothing sadder than watching a mighty alicorn, huge and majestic, flapping his wings as hard as he can, forehead vein bulging, tongue nearly bitten and sticking out to the side, eyes clenched shut... and only scattering a few feathers or loose dust for all that breath-gasping effort. (Scootaloo would just nod and say "Been there, done that")
Pegasi make it look so easy, and they don't even flap that hard. Those wings should not be able to lift them! Pergasi are like... like bumblebees! How do they do that?!?
And if Ted ever does get off the ground and soar the open skies...
(Hope he learns how to work that healing spell for all the 'abrupt' landings because everyone knows it's easy to take off, it's landing that's the killer)
I approve.
I dont see at this time how hes going to get Luna to help instead of hinder him, but thats what future chapters are for anyway.
1. XD dis is both a comedy and a sort of drama adventure, i'm happy some actual good works got on the front page for once.
2.
DA FUQ?
THIS WAS ADORABLE!
To each their own, but for me the video game/DND dream sequences are a jarring tonal shift that doesn't seem to add anything meaningful to the story or even the main character. I know he needs to meet Luna in a dream but taking the time to set up a weird out of place fight scene dream is distracting to me.
5932984
It could be worse. Personally, I'm just glad he isn't doing the other obvious thing and having a giant dream-orgy, instead of a nerdy little power fantasy.
5933046 Dammit, now I have to rewrite the next chapter....
5933247
I can't stop you. I can judge you for it, though. Feel the sting of my mild disapproval.
Hey, you should probably remove the sex tag if you're not actually going to have sex. I almost skipped over this fic just because it had the sex tag.
"Nobody likes wizards, you hear me? You are doomed to die alone." - Scout
Oh, Tuna, you're in over your head...and you still need to recruit Sunbutt and Sparklebutt to help you go to your world and stop your rogue body from...doing evil things to your XBone/PS4 online reputation
Or not, since she's probably become the world champion of online gaming by now
Interesting. I see so much potential in this story. Now I want you to write faster.
Ted: "My name is Tuna."
Ted: "I mean Lead. Wait that doesnt sound right either."
Ted: "Luna. My name is Luna."
Ted: "Why's everypony looking at me like that?"
5933745 *clutches chest* Argh!
5934170 Sexual references. I figured that's what the sex tag was for when it was on a teen story. If I'm wrong someone correct me.
5934326 I'll be starting the next one tonight, though I may not finish it until Monday. Still have work today, that goes till 8, then I have to hit the store.
5934838
Teen story sex tag: How I've seen it used.
1. Implied sex. PG bedroom scene. (And then the two went to the bedroom to make whoopee. The next morning they made coffee.)
2. Lots of Innuendo.
3. Sex ed. A birds and the bee's discussion. Usually used with number 2.
In any case. The sex tag is one of the tags that can turn off readers. So it's best to write a small note saying exactly what you mean by the sex tag.
What's big tuna gonna do next I wonder?
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5934913 What's that? Ted needs to be educated about his new anatomy? Good idea! I've already got someone in mind for that, actually = 3