Being subtle isn't Rainbow Dash's strong suit. At all. So when Applejack asks her point blank what she thinks of Rarity, she doesn't hold back.

Not her best idea.

Pre-Read by: SapphireColors | LoneUnicornWriter

Reading by LandonWho

Rarity, Twilight, and their friends are eating lunch, when AJ notices Twilight staring at a stallion. In the ensuing conversation, Twilight soon learns that her friends are all crazy ponies and have somehow gotten it into their heads that she is in a relationship with her mentor and idol Princess Celestia.

Applejack tries to write a love letter. She mostly fails. A TwiJack story, set somewhere in early Season 4.

Tired of Luna's constant nagging, Celestia agrees to give internet dating a try. Using the website www.notforeveralone.com, Luna helps Celestia go on dates with potential immortal suitors. Shouldn't be too hard to find true love, right?

You can make a suggestion for any immortal across any manner of genre or fiction for Celestia to date next. Just make sure they're immortal for it to work.

Updates every Tuesday and Friday.

Guest chapters for immortals I have not covered are welcome, since I won't be able to write about every suggestion someone has. Note that all guest chapters are non-canon from the main story, so there is a bit of leeway to them. Talk to me over PM's for any further discussion.

Thanks to my editors The Ponytrician and Garnot for all their help!

Cover art from the hilarious tumblr you all should check out, ~Letters For Celestia~

There's a crisis in Ponyville. Some mysterious magic is turning everything into fashion nightmares. But never mind that.

Rainbow Dash is stuck in a dress, and she desperately needs a place to crash and wait out the spell. Where else than on Applejack's couch?

In response to threats of a griffon attack on Equestria, Twilight responds with a letter detailing just why such actions would prove unfavorable for them.

Golden Harvest is not jealous. Sure, her neighbor Applejack has a life of adventure and glamor, friends who are national heroes and princesses, an appallingly lucrative share in the local fruit market, and firm, toned flanks. And sure, by contrast, Golden Harvest has been stuck with her snout in the same old muddy patch of carrots pretty much every day since she earned her cutie mark, her best friend is a dentist, and her idea for a 'Carrot Juice Season' never really gained much ground for some reason. But Golden Harvest is not jealous.

Not jealous at all.

She just wishes Applejack would stop being so distracting.

*

Pre-read by Midnight Herald and Communist Bob (no link).

Applejack and Twilight are good ponies. They've been dating for three months, and they both agree that some things are worth waiting for. But when Rainbow Dash brags about what she and Rarity did on their second date, it kicks off a day of questions for both couples. What do good ponies do when, and why?

Being the mayor of Ponyville is not easy, not when you have the Elements of Harmony and the Cuite Mark Crusaders always causing trouble. Mayor Mare has a solution however, a Bachelor auction and Big Mac is the star of her little show. Follow Mac as he goes through his own personal hell, while the other stallions seem to be enjoying themselves!

Stallions on the Block: Big Mac, Soarin, Braeburn, Bulk Biceps, Prince Blueblood, Flash Sentry, Caramel, Thunderlane, Dr. Whooves/Time Turner, and Spike! Also two new ponies that you might be able to recognize.

Written by: Captain Unstoppable
Jake the Army Guy
Featured Story?! Thank you all!

Update: Since all of you have been debating the age, Jake and I have decided that the ages are as followed. Main Six are in their early twenties. CMC/Spike pre-teens 10-12. Mac mid twenties.

Thank you as always to jszellmer for the edits.

Thank you to KarmaDash for the idea bouncing along with Shrapmo as well.

Finally thank you mcwhale4 for the great cover art!

Also, here is what Auction has been like for Jake and Cap
Enjoy!

One average morning, one average princess, one average kitchen, and one average bag of whole wheat bread slices... No one could mess this up.

One-Shot about beloved Luna doing perhaps one of the most mundane of tasks.