Dear Emperor Tail Feather,
Dear Emperor Tail Feather,
While I am aware of the tensions between our nations, I am at a loss for what "affronts" you referenced in your missive. If you would like to open diplomatic channels in regards to any grievances, we would be happy to receive them. Otherwise, we must reject your offers to "accept our unconditional surrender." While a fair offer in the face of your alternative offer of, "absolute annihilation", once again I must repeat that we will "take our chances" as one might say, or in fact to the opposite, may suggest that you do not initiate such a plan for your own wellbeing.
As to not allow my turnabout to be mistaken for hubris, I have constructed a list of reasons such an action would be inconvenient, detrimental, devastating, or outright apocalyptic for you.
First is the issue of the pony-power. The Griffonian Military is impressive, reports placing its structure as comprising of as much as one sixth of the total population, but while that greatly dwarfs ours on paper (as we effectively do not have one outside of war time, and then only by volunteering) the difference must be considered not as what our army is, but what as what it will be.
Projecting from past statistics, the cultural significance of military service to the pegasi historically inclines one sixth of the population to volunteer for service, composing the majority of our combat troops. Half that number of the earth-pony community (about one twelfth of the earth pony population) typically enlists, most to provide non-combat support. The least (by total number) typically come from the Unicorn population due to their innately weaker physical stature and the relative scarcity of combat trained spell casters. Those unicorns that are trained in offensive or defensive magic, though, provide force-multiplying support and especially powerful unicorns possess the power to single-hoofedly defend (or otherwise) entire cities.
Through the prevalence of food, advanced magical and traditional medical care, and generally lower infant mortality rates, Equestria has a population triple that of Griffonia, resulting in its theoretical military capacity actually marginally exceeding that of Griffonia's, so outright conflict would be inadvisable, as we would be defending and have "home field advantage" as it were.
Furthermore, while Griffonia's isolationist policies have effectively spurned any attempts at alliances, Equestria has built relations with every nation of sentient beings on the planet, many of which would provide aid in our defense.
The Crystal Empire has sworn full allied mobilization, as have the Minotaurs, Zebradica has pledged food supplies, and the Saddle Arabians have pledged monetary resources. Furthermore, in the face of the destruction of their only viable food source, I'm sure the changelings would take subversive actions against you in our defense. And of course, as you should know, if the balance of world power is challenged the dragons will see to it that it is re-established.
Our overwhelming military resources don't really matter though, as it would never get that far anyway. Allow me to tell you why.
First, we have the forces of nature on our side. For example, it is very difficult to invade while there is a constant hurricane on the border (assuming we stop it there).
Second, it is difficult to support a war without food, and if Equestria were to embargo our exports of food, Griffonia's own production would not be able to support its own population, let alone a war effort.
Third, assuming you did have enough food, you would have no way of transporting it effectively. Our supply lines are structured around our nation's earth pony population, as their innate strength allows them to transport massive amounts of food by land. An entirely Griffon force, though, would be unable to transport anywhere near as much. They would be to overburdened for flight carrying more than a day or two's supply, so unless a disproportionately high number of troops were devoted to the task of transporting by land, the very act of sending troops across the natural barriers between our nations would starve your forces out.
But if you ignored these facts and war were to start, you would not only have to contest the aforementioned coalition and conditions, but also some insurmountable trump cards.
The go-to trump card of Equestria has historically been the Elements of Harmony, items regarded as the most powerful force in existence. If retrieved, they could be utilized to an unexpected effect, which would unquestionably result in "Harmony" in some form through your repulsion, imprisonment in stone, banishment to the moon, etcetera.
While not distinctly Equestrian, The Crystal Heart would be utilized in our defense. It is, if you are unaware, an item capable of projecting a shield large enough to surround nations and powerful enough to repulse any outside threat indefinitely.
On the front of trump-card abilities, we are capable of producing the sonic-rainboom effect. If you are unaware, this event is a meta-physical disturbance wave propagation which is a technical term for what you may better classify as a magical EMP that would disable any magical devices and overload any spells within a substantial radius. I am aware of Griffonia's general lack of magical devices, but if you did have any intention of using magical weapons or enhancements, it should be known that they will not be of use for long.
While there are many other magical items and abilities that could be mentioned, the list would go on nearly indefinitely, so for the sake of brevity I will leave it at just these three, as these are just the most well-known and relevant to defense.
If this outlining of our defensive capabilities was not able to sway you, and everything I have mentioned above was somehow rendered impotent, and you did successfully “annihilate" us, you would then have to contest life in a world without ponies, a more daunting task than you may imagine, considering what would remain.
Equestria boasts four immortals: Celestia, Discord, Luna, and myself. In the face of our ponies’ deaths, undoubtedly a terrible fate would befall those who had harmed them, and this is no unsubstantiated claim: you would suffer.
Luna, the princess of the moon and night, once threatened to basically destroy the world because she was not being appreciated by ponies. If you intended to kill those whose admiration keeps the wrath of a Nightmare at bay, I shudder to imagine what force she would bring to bear against you.
I cannot say what Celestia would do, but if the nation she has spent an era creating and nurturing were to be destroyed, I have little doubt that her mind may be taken by a Nightmare similarly to Luna's. That would place two dark-magic enhanced immortal alicorns bent on revenge at your proverbial throats.
If that were also not to be enough, Discord, god of chaos, has recently taken up residence in Equestria and has shown bonds with ponies he values enough to deny his fundamental nature. I cannot gauge his full power, but it should be pointed out (and as you should well know) he once ruled the entire planet, subjugating and terrorizing all species for his amusement. If those he values were to be forcibly taken from him, I daresay his wrath against the guilty would be quite unpleasant to say the least.
As the youngest, and least studied of the immortals of Equestria, my reaction to the destruction of our nation can only be judged on projections of my mental state, as assumed to carry over from my time as a mortal. As much as I would dislike to put it in writing, It would be a lie to say I was (or am) entirely stable. In the face of the same stimulus, I fear I would simply go insane before a Nightmare form could overtake me. While this may result in my incapacitation, my other episodes of insanity have proven more proactive. That is to say, I may seek indiscriminate revenge, possibly also utilizing the dark magic I have recently learned from my mentor and a bout with the entity formerly known as Lord Sombra.
And finally, just for the sake of argument, if you did manage to kill our immortals, it must be remembered that the very rotation of the celestial sphere has fallen under the charge of ponies since the time of creation. The sun and moon have always been risen and set by ponies, and without us to guide their motion, they would cease to revolve. No organic life would survive beyond a year as the sun-facing side cooked off all moisture and the dark side froze to the point that even its oxygen began to condense to liquid.
I suppose it would also be relevant to mention that Discord and I both are bonded to universal forces, Chaos and Magic respectively, and as such, there is the odd possibility that our deaths could destabilize all reality. Or rather, quite possibility all of all realities.
Just thought you should know.
-Twilight Sparkle
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In regards to Her Serene Majesty going "Nightmare", four words: Flaming Goddess of Death
4185014 Nothing ends a conflict quite like pure solar plasma.
A bit hyperbolic, but I enjoyed the imagery.
Cover art suggestion: close-up of a purple hoof inexplicably flipping the viewer the bird.
So thanks for that.
4185039 think this would work? terrariaonline.com/attachments/22659-hoof-macro-twilight_sparkle-png.6800/
I read. I liked. I Faved.
I have often thought about the militaristic power of the ponies, but I have never gotten around to writing a story based on their power. Thanks for this.
And, she hanst even mentioned what happens when a unicorn deliberatly miss casts a teleport spell on an object, and as someone esle very succintly puts it, quantum mechanics prevents two pieces of matter from coexisting in the same space. Hoever, it allows two pieces of energy to occupy the same volume. Hence, the laws of quantum mechanics declare that that baseball taleported into that city wall, become two baseball sized chunks of pure energy. Which dont remain in the vicinity for very long, usually slightly less than one foot per nanosecond therafter.
The only problem with people who deman their right to rule, are so mentally disorderd that nothing they observe is real unless they allow it, even to personal physical degradation and destruction.
I have a couple issues with this, since I'm fairly certain that Griffons would be capable of controlling the weather, since if I remember correctly Gilda could land on clouds so it stands to reason that Griffons could manipulate the weather. As well, the military of griffons, having been trained year round as well having body parts as weapons, would individually be much better soldiers than Equestrians. As well, in the past it has been shown that unicorns could control the sun and moon, and I find it unlikely that only ponies, changelings, and Discord can tap into magic that could potentially move the sun and moon.
All the same though, it's still a great story and it would be extremely difficult to write a story like this and not have someone be able to nitpick it apart.
Now this was and enjoyable story. I give many kudos to the author for such a fun and well thought out little story!
4185126 Yeah, griffons may be able to control weather, but pegasi have been shown to be powerless against things like tornadoes, so I doubt the griffons could stop or divert a well-built hurricane. I'd agree that griffons would be much better soldiers in single combat against pegasi though... As for the sun and the moon, I really don't know what to think about that...
Very amusing watching Twilight deconstruct the griffon's plan for war.
I found one mistake:
You forgot about Cadence.
4185174 She's the sovereign of the Crystal Empire, so she doesn't count.
4185052 Works for me!
Is this nsfw by FIMFic standards?
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/304653__UNOPT__safe_twilight-sparkle_animated_image-macro_vulgar_the-simpsons_510d41787f123b917800010a_wrong-neighborhood.gif
Also: i.imgur.com/CxlokaZ.jpg
And doing an image search on the subject reminded me that horses' hooves are the middle finger/toe already. Go fig!
needs more Twilight rape face.
This was awesome. Just so you know, if I wasn't already following you, I would be after this.
4185161
But what about the ponies who built the hurricane. Besides, I think you meant tornado, as I highly doubt Pegasi could make a hurricane.
4185487 Why not a hurricane? Given enough time to prepare, they could probably do it.
4185596
cache.boston.com/universal/site_graphics/blogs/bigpicture/hurricane_09_08/hurricane6.jpg
That is a hurricane taken from orbit, the pegasi had difficulty whipping up a tornado, they're not making a hurricane.
A category 1 goes 74-95 mph, cat. 2 goes 96-110, cat 3 goes 111-130, cat. 4 is 131-155, and cat. 5 is winds exceeding 156.
And making a hurricane is much more complicated than just flying around in circles. Way more complicated. In fact, making a tornado is much more complicated than just flying around in circles.
4185632 they control the cycles of the seasons and the solar body that forms all weather on the planet, if your head cannon says they can't make a hurricane that's your right, but I like to keep a more optimistic view of their capabilities.
4185644
0-media-cdn.foolz.us/ffuuka/board/vp/image/1365/33/1365337603923.png
I have a headcannon?
I don't know about you, but I don't think I have a headcannon. What I do have is science and common sense.
The smallest hurricane on record, measured 11.5 miles wide.
Like I said before, they're not making a hurricane.
4185661
...oh... I'm being trolled... 
not very well... 
4185723
Troll?
Good sir, I very rarely troll. And I'm not trolling, I was simply poking fun at your misspelling of headcanon.
Every other point stands.
4185736 So let me get this straight, in a land of magical flying ponies, where you accept their ability to raise the sun and moon, as well as manipulate water vapor with their hooves, the only problem your scientific philosophy finds is the claim that they can make hurricanes? I was hoping you were a troll at that point, because now I don't even know how to argue...
4185741
Ahah, but I can come up theories.
First off the sun and the moon. The IDW comics show them to be quite small. If you have the power to do it, pushing or pulling would not be that difficult.
Ability to manipulate water vapor? They're solidifying it by pushing magic out of their hooves.
They could theoretically make a hurricane, it's just too large.
4185763 ...and once again we round the bend to the fact you can say what you will, but I disagree... Anyway, since we've now hit this point for the second time, I'm not going to respond to any more discussion on this matter...
4185784
It makes sense though, Luna and Celestia have to power to mover their respective body, but they can't make an 11 mile wide hurricane.
A tropical depression? Maybe.
My headcanon is that Twilight is now responsible for magic (ley line pruning, balancing, repairing scars like the Everfree) in the same way that Celestia and Luna are responsible for the sun and moon.
So she may just divert the Griffon ley lines.
Griffons fly with magic. They grow food with magic, or hunt by flying. At minimum, they lose these abilities and die off in about a year or capitulate. Worst case, it's instantly lethal to all life in Griffon lands.
I think I'd rather anger Celestia.
Nicely done Wages. A most enjoyable read.
4185908
They don't necesarily use magic to fly, I'm not an ornithologist, but gryphon wings appear large enough to support them. Especially if they have hollow bones.
And it's not instantly lethal, that makes no sense.
Twilight didn't mention one of the other deadly forces in Equestria. A force beyond physics and logic. A force known primarily as Pinkie Pie. She may not be the best when it comes to combat, but if she gets inside the griffon lands (and there's no doubt that she can), all she has to do is chase those in charge of directing the offense. Even if they run inside a super secure safehouse and lock the door (even with a good head start), Pinkie will be there. I'd give any of the griffons in charge a week tops before they either concede defeat, give up, or go mad.
Is it worth noting that the last army to invade Equestria was defeated pretty much entirely by two ponies?
In other words, when it's time for a throwdown, simply say, "Luna, sick 'em,"
4186146
And their leader beat Celestia.
Dafuq you mean two armies? The changelings, that's it.
4186034
The square-cube law is brutal with regard to flight. A griffon is larger and heavier than an albatross even with hollow bones. An albatross has a wingspan of up to 12 feet and needs a running start to lift off. Magic is very necessary for griffon flight.
4186228
Meh, I suppose so. But like I said, I'm not an ornithologist, and I can't be bothered to learn things that involve math. Considering the fact that math is my mortal enemy.
Damn you math! Damn you!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4186221
Yes, but obviously you don't mention that part. The entire point of intimidation like this is to emphasize your strengths as much as possible while leaving out your weaknesses. Just like how she doesn't mention that there is only one pony in existence who can pull off the Sonic Rainboom.
What?
"Or we could just drop the sun on your capital city. That works too."
4186236
Not meaning to come down on you, it's just that flight is really hard.
4186261
Whoops, sorry. Thought you said last armies which my brain then translated as two armies.
4186262
No, it doesn't. You'd destroy half the damn planet as well.
4186275
Just half? It would destroy the whole planet, and the entire solar system besides. Unless their sun is much much smaller than ours and actually is controlled by Celestia, in which case she can place it directly over their capital city and lower it to the right altitude to scorch the place, or have it emit a huge ball of fire to just plain nuke it. But while explaining that in detail has a certain nerdy charm, for purposes of intimidation "I can drop the sun on you" works just fine.
4186284
Theres a problem with that, in doing so, she would destroy the ozone layer or whatever they have. Which could have unknown effects on the rest of the planet. I think solar warfare is out of the question.
4186285
If we're going to foolishly start worrying about the 'consequences of our actions on the planet' then we probably wouldn't be warring in the first place. Happily, in a world that runs on magic any kind of massive environmental disaster can be fixed with an application of Deus Ex Machina.
4186291
I hate Deus Ex Machinas.
And besides, warring isn't bad for the planet. All those bodies act as fertilizers.
4185805
"Theoretically, wouldn't it be possible for Pegasi to trigger a Hurricane? After the Rotation has begun, natural forces would be able to Sustain the depression until a Hurricane is formed. Subsequently, Pegasi would only need to produce Gusts to dive the main from Equestria."
Just saying:
In times of a possable war with Griffins, imtimidating them is only gonna escalate things. I don't think the Emperor will take the threats seriously, or very well for that matter.
I think Diplomacy would be the smarter course of action.
4186295
Human history is a litany of blood spilled over differing ideals of rulership and afterlife. Barring the pre-Equestrian era, ponies have no such history. They share consensus on such things. Give me a choice between living in this world and living in Equestria, and I'll choose Equestria without fail. Meat may become something of a rare treat, but it would be a worthwhile change of living arrangements.
4186326
I'll choose here thank you very much.
What about Princess Mi Amore Cadenza? Wouldn't she be upset at the 'complete annihilation' of Shinning Armor?
4186320
Assuming the conditions are right to allow a Hurricane to continue, sure. They're a very specific set of conditions, but it's definitely possible.
And given that Earth hurricanes can exist in diameters of up to 4000km (2485mi for those that don't speak Metric), it could easily serve as a national barrier assuming the physics work the same way.
Note that this is the measurement of the area affected by the winds generated, not the wind-cone itself.
Getting a little sarcastic there Twi. You should know better! :D This deserves 4/5 moustaches!
