Celestia's life hasn't been as fun as you might think. When she was younger, her parents were too busy for her. As she grew up, she became more detached from the little ponies around her. Luckily, she had a friend who would be there with her forever.

Celestia, the ever regal and gentle princess...

Celestia, who along her sister, rules over the land for eons...

Celestia, holder of unlimited knowledge and the power over the sun itself...

Is still a mare. And a very lonely mare.

She always wanted a foal to call her son, but she was a princess. Something desirable by many, approachable by none.
So what happens when Celestia finds a young colt?

Why she will adopt him of course. And she will love him forever.

Despite his cursing, senseless mumbling and apparent delirious mind.
Yes, she will love him, even if appearances can be deceiving...

Adam, the ever lazy and impulsive teen...

Adam, who wants nothing more than some peace and quiet, even if he's doing jack-shit to achieve anything...

Adam, holder of limited knowledge and power over his own laptop...

Is a pony. Or a colt, more precisely.

He was not always like that, though it doesn't change the fact that he is now. So, what will our human do in a foreign world, trapped in a foreign body?

Why he gets adopted of course.

And despite his cursing, senseless mumbling and apparent childish mind.
His adoptive 'Mother' will love him.

And why does her sister looks at him that way?

We all know how this goes, don't we? Some unlucky schmuck goes to a Halloween party or convention dressed up as someone evil, gets sent to Equestria, and then ends up antagonizing the locals.

Well my story goes a bit differently. My name is Isaac Donohue, and after a night of drunken partying that I STILL can't remember, I wake up in Equestria fifteen hundred years before the events of canon with five seemingly random superpowers:

Angelic Physiology, so I'm frickin gorgeous now. Oxygen Independence, so I don't need to breath. Asexual Reproduction, just call me Mister Mommy why don't you...Bubble Breath, something useless that I rarely use. Power Replication, otherwise known as a game breaker.

So anyways I befriended everyone's favorite draconequus Discord, and we made such beautiful chaos together. Well, it was more of me trying to reform him before he got stoned by the Princesses in an effort to change history for the better. What a waste of time that was, and as a result of this I got petrified as well for being his accomplice. Can you believe that?

Since I'm free, I've decided to settle down and rule a kingdom of my own. I'm sure there are enough tyrants in the world that need to be overthrown despite Sunbutt's best efforts. But if there aren't any, I'm pretty sure I can steal the Crystal Empire from Sombra before Shining Armor and Cadence do.

The only problem is, THE LAW WON'T STOP CHASING ME!

A LoHAV story that I'm writing as I go on.

ANNOUNCEMENT 6/4/2017: I'm sorry, but this story is cancelled. This has been a long time coming. As I've progressed as a writer I look back on this story with increasing amounts of disgust. Still, I know people enjoy it for some reason which is why I'm leaving it up for posterity's sake. Maybe I'll completely rewrite it from the ground up in the future, but that time is not now.

An insane and illogical parody of your favorite ponies.

Are you looking for a story about the magic of friendship or how great it is to be alive? Too bad! What you're getting is a story about a bitter bookworm named Twilight Sparkle who just got booted out of Canterlot and is forced to go to a little backwater town named Ponyville in order to get some sort of social life.

Will she enjoy it? No. Not at all.

Rated Teen for strong language, cartoonish violence, immature humor, and god-awful jokes.
Sex tag is for repeated mentions of sex, sexual activities, and Rainbow Dash. Just...Rainbow Dash in general.

Cover Image by the very talented Wadusher0.

Now on TV Tropes!

There are consequences to every action, but we can't always predict what they will be. I stay up at night wondering what I could have done differently, but I've already paid the price for my actions. All I can do now is deal with the consequences, and I've got several great friends to help me do it.

Edited by: Neko Majin C, 314, Kleora, Dash The Stampede

After Twilight returns from the Human World, Celestia is desperate to know of her former student, Sunset Shimmer, and what happened to her. Upon learning of the horrible things her former student has done, Celestia breaks down in tears as Twilight asks why she was so important to Celestia and why she never told anypony. Celestia tells the story of her and Sunset. How they were so close, and how one secret ruined everything between them.

Spoilers in comments.

Thanks to Biker_Dash, ugugg93, and The Abyss for edit and Pre-reading

Thanks to SilFoe for letting use the art

A starving colt is found hiding in Applejacks barn, he refuses to speak too much about where he comes from, claiming that he would be branded crazy and locked away.

Applejack doesn't know if that would happen,

But he does seem to know more about her and her friends than he should
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Okay first fiction on this site, more of a way to develop my skills before I launch into some big ideas I have so constructive criticism is appreciated as my descriptions probably suck right now

This is inspired by Oh to be Old Again by Minalkra (which you should totally check out as well)

Enjoy!

EDIT: Now with cover art by the ever talented mix-up! It is just awesome! Check out his pages here and on Deviantart!