Pinkie Predictions
“So…” said Spike. “Any particular reason I have a rock on my head?”
He was standing outside. In his hand was a stick, on his neck was a ring of leaves, and on his head was a rock.
“Well,” said Twilight, “We girls have our dresses for the Gala, but we still need to get you a suit.”
“I see,” said Spike. “…Any particular reason you couldn’t just ask Rarity for one?”
“Because I just wasted my weekend making dresses for Rarity,” explained Twilight. “I’ve seen enough of her boutique to last me a lifetime.” She pointed her horn at Spike. It began to glow, along with the rock, leaves, and stick.
Spike looked nervously at Twilight’s horn. “You’ve…you’ve done this before right?”
“Of course!” said Twilight. “Don’t worry, there’s only a slight chance that this will result in an explosion!”
“Really?” asked Spike. “How slight?”
“Only a solid 57% chance of explosions,” said Twilight nonchalantly. “Now hold still.”
Spike grimaced and prepared for the inevitable explosion. To his surprise, the leaves turned into a suit jacket, the stick into a fancy walking stick, and the rock into a top hat.
The glow in Twilight’s horn died as she stopped concentrating. She panted and said, “See? Nothing to worry about!”
“Yeah!” said Spike, eyeing his new suit. “I can’t believe you did-”
Spike’s suit exploded, consuming the dragon in a fireball.
“…Huh,” said Twilight. “Maybe next time.”
“You’re lucky I’m fireproof,” said Spike as he put out the flames. He sighed and said, “Listen, I’ll just go over to Rarity’s and-” He paused, frowning. “What’s Pinkie Pie doing?”
Twilight turned around and saw Pinkie ducking behind a tree. She poked her head out and looked up nervously. She ran underneath a nearby house’s porch and repeated the motion. She dashed to a rock near Twilight and Spike hid underneath it.
“…I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about,” said Twilight.
“Really?” asked Spike, pointing at the ground beneath Twilight.
Twilight looked down and saw Pinkie cowering underneath her. “Twitchy-twitch!” she moaned.
Twilight sighed and said, “Pinkie, what are you doing?”
“It’s my tail!” said Pinkie. She put her rear in the air, right next to Twilight’s face. “See?”
Twilight backed up. “Please don’t shove your butt in my face, ok?” She glanced at Pinkie’s tail, which was twitching madly. “Are you cold?”
“No!” said Pinkie, putting her rump down. “It’s twitching! You know what that means!”
“You have that Michael J. Fox thing?” guessed Twilight.
“No!” said Pinkie Pie. “I don’t even have a DeLorean. It means that something stuff is going to start falling! You should duck for cover!”
“Pinkie,” said Twilight exasperatedly, “Nothing’s going to fall. Hell, it’s not even going to rain today. See?” She pointed to the sky. “Not a cloud in the-”
A frog fell from nowhere and landed on Twilight’s face.
“Frog,” she finished. She used her magic to lift the frog off of her. “Where the fuck did this come from?”
“I’m so sorry!” said a voice.
Everyone looked up to see Fluttershy, who was carrying a basket of frogs and had was pulling a wagon of frogs behind her.
“Are you okay?” she asked, tears in her eyes.
“I’m fine,” said Twilight, smiling. “Thank you for-”
“Not you.” Fluttershy swooped down and grabbed the floating frog. “Are you ok, Michigan?”
“Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal!” sang the frog.
“Yeah, you’re fine,” said Fluttershy, stuffing the frog back into the basket.
“Why do you have all those frogs?” asked Spike.
“Oh…uh…” said Fluttershy. She looked around nervously. “No reason…”
Meanwhile:
Cheerilee sighed as she stood in front of the class. “Bad news kids,” she said, “Fluttershy stole all the frogs we were going to dissect today, so we’re going to take a pop quiz.”
The class groaned.
“I will now plot my revenge!” squeaked Sweetie Belle, brandishing a battle ax.
“Count me in, sister,” growled Scootaloo, grinding a lit cigarette into her desk.
Back with the others:
“I’m going to fly as many as these guys as I can to Froggy Bottom Bog!” said Fluttershy happily.
“Good,” growled Twilight. “Great. Good for you. Get the fuck out of here, already.”
“I’d smack you for your attitude,” growled Fluttershy, “But I don’t want to drop any more frogs.” She huffed and fly away.
“That was a little harsh,” said Pinkie.
“Oh shut up,” said Twilight. “I just got hit in the face with a frog.”
“Did it get you hopping mad?” asked Spike with a grin.
Twilight glared at Spike. “Do you really want me to make you explode again?”
“Uh…” began Spike nervously.
“You know what? Never mind,” said Twilight. “Let’s just try making you a suit again.” She walked away.
Spike ran after her. “You’ve got to admit that was pretty cool though. Pinkie Pie knew something would fall and-”
“And nothing,” said Twilight. “It was just a coincidence Spike.”
“You know what’s not a coincidence?” asked Pinkie, running up to them. She turned around and raised her rear in the air. “My tail’s twitching again!”
Twilight backed away again. “Pinkie, stop putting your butt in my face.”
“I’m not complaining!” Spike said, slightly drooling.
“Something else is going to fall!” said Pinkie.
“Pinkie, please,” said Twilight, walking away. “Nothing is going to-” Twilight’s words turned into a scream as she fell into a ditch. “Ow…” she moaned.
“You were right again!” said Spike.
“I know!” said Pinkie.
“Coincidence!” yelled Twilight as she climbed out of the ditch.
“Apples!” yelled Applejack as she walked over.
Everyone stared at her.
She blushed. “Sorry…Ah just wanted to be included.”
“Applejack!” said Spike. “Pinkie Pie predicted-”
“She didn’t predict anything!” yelled Twilight. “Two coincidences in a row does not mean that Pinkie’s twitchy tail can predict the future. Right, Applejack?” Twilight turned, but Applejack had disappeared. “Where did she go?”
Spike pointed. Twilight looked to see Applejack hiding under a produce stand. “Seriously?” she asked, frowning.
“It’s ok!” called Spike. “Her prediction already happened.”
“Thank God,” said Applejack, crawling out from under the stand.
“What is wrong with you two?!” yelled Twilight.
“Ah know this doesn’t make a whole lot of sense,” began Applejack, “But trust me, if Pinkie Pie predicts somethin’, you’d be better off listenin’ to her.”
“My ears are flopping!” yelled Pinkie, whose ears were whacking her in the face.
“Ok…” said Spike, looking around. “What does that mean?”
Pinkie winced and looked at Twilight. “I’ll draw you a bath.”
“What?” asked Twilight.
A cart rolled by, splashing Twilight with mud. At the same time, a pegasus flew by and dropped a large chocolate cake on Twilight.
“Look out!” yelled a pony. “That manure cart’s lost control!”
Twilight looked at the oncoming cart and her eyes widened. “Mommy…” she muttered.
The cart overturned, spilling its…contents on Twilight.
The once clean unicorn sighed and looked over at Pinkie. “I’ll take that bath now,” she said.
Pinkie dropped the pencil she was using and held up a sketch of a bathtub. “I told you I’d draw you a bath!” she said happily.
Twilight’s eye twitched. “…I fucking hate all of you.”
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As I was reading the previous chapter, this one popped up
! Praise Lord Smooze!
Considering the episode and your own unique style of things, I am going to feel really really bad for Twilight before this is all over.
5634101 Don't worry. She'll be fine.
...
Scars fade over time, right?
5634145 Only the physical kind.
Finally... The time has come... *rubs hooves together expectantly*
After reading, I admit you still have it but check your spelling on a few things.
I have a Boner
Twilight should kill Pinkie. Let's see the Pinkie Sense predict that!
5634783 I'm glad you still like this. As for the spelling, can you give an example?
5634811
Thank you for that heapin helpin of TMI.
From how the mane six act around each other in this fic Discord is either going to have one easy or one really hard time breaking their minds. Can't wait to see that happen
5636156 I can see it now. Fast forward to Season 3...
Discord: You ponies really think you can reform me?
Fluttershy: I can't wait to spend some quality time with you! I'll even invite my friends!
Discord: ...
Celestia: Congratulations! I knew you could do it!
5637017 that or discord will ask to be put back in stone.
That's the part where Twilight gets locked away in the place she's banished to. Cuz that's the part where she kills a pony.
Most excellent.
Twilight has Pinkie sense too! Eye-twitch means that somepony's gonna die!
Amazing how many people forget Spike is fireproof.
Corner. Now.
Ha.
I wouldn't either
5644236
Corner?
Why not just smash his face in with the stone from before and have two wires fed through his scales so they pierce his testicals and then run an electrical current through the wires?
Whats that? Yes I am a psycopath. Why are you running away?
Oh I get it...
Ÿ̴̩͙͇̤̫̘̫͍̐͂̒͊͂̊̿̓ͥ̈́̈̚͟ͅO̡̝̤̘̰̯̱͈͆̓̾̅ͭͦ̅̌̕Ũ̔́̐̇̅ͫͩͧ̍̿̽͛ͦͯ͑̋̌͞͏͢͏̨͔̘̯̩̳̯͚̻̩͕̪͇̪̭̹'̶̧̬̱̯̫͉̱̯̝͚͚ͮ̈ͩ͗ͥ͆́ͅŖ̶̰̖͍͕͙̭͉͔̥̪̺͓̜͚̯̓ͬ̆̓ͬ̇ͅE̸̼͕͕̥̾ͣ̾͛̉̋͗ͩ͑̽̀̃̿͠ ̵̨̼̫̯͔̣͉͔̗̖̘͙̹̰̪̓̉̅ͩ̈͒̃̌͢P̶̷̢̈̏̌̉̃̓͑ͤ͛̽̌ͥ̇҉̢̼̼̙L̢̫̰͍̺̰̗̠̪̞̤̖̩͕͔̟͌̓͌ͧ́̍̊̎̚͢͝͞Ạ̷̢̟̹̭̯̻͖̟̥̩͚̾ͮ̈́͂̈́ͣ̂͋͑̋̐̾͐͂̎͜͡Y̜͈͖͕̮̗̖͖͙̜͍͓͈͚͈̔ͬ͗ͣ̎̔͗̏̌̓ͦ̚͠I̴̓͗͂̂̄͂̌̊͑̚҉̰̭̻̥Ň̵̴͓̪̻̤̤̥̱̘̭͇͚͖̽ͫ̅ͥ̒̊ͮ̓̉͗̍͐͒̂̓̚̕͝G̢̗̦͙̣̺͖͍̟̓ͫ̾ͮ͌ͮ̏̔̂ͣͥ̒̊̉͂͘ ̯̪̖̞̬̭̟͓̮͂ͣ̂́ͣ́̕͡H̴̨̬̖͖̳̒ͫ̉̅͗̅̊̋ͅA̛̝̞̦̯͉̤̘̔̉̓͂̏̈́̃ͮ͗̓̃̃̂̈͂̍̑R͌ͩ̋̆ͧ̓̇ͣ̑̇͏̷̪̥͎̭͚̤͜͜͡Ḏ̗̣̪͔̰͔̦ͬ̎ͥ͐͜ͅͅ ̮̹͕̳͔̳̮ͣ̎̑̈̈̎̎ͨ͑̀ͩ̄̎ͮ͗̄̀͡͝T̶̵̜͙̰̹̝͇̘͔̹̆̊̽ͯ͊ͤ͐̓̐͂́͐ͮ̌ͤ̅̚͘͟͠ͅͅO̸̢ͫ̔̓̎ͯͨ̓̚͡҉͇͔̝̦̀ͅ ̴̟͓͚̱͉̭̥͔̲̯ͫ̉ͭ͂̿͊͐͛ͦ͐̓͂̄͒͘͜͜K̶̶̛͔͇̼͖̙͙̬̯͙̯̰̞̃̋͋̽ͨͩ̈͋͗͆ͩ͑ͦͣͬ́̚Ĩ̬͔̫͙̲̱͚̞̠͙̌ͣ͆̃ͫͧ͟ͅL̵̛̺̟̜̙̤̣̱͕͍ͣͮͫͪ̒̿ͮ͆̒ͤͥ̎ͧ̌͑̚ͅL̨̢̯̲̻̥̦̲̯͚̬̘͇̱̞͈̋͐ͫͦ̎ͣ͆̏̍̑͂ͅͅͅ!̸̵̟̯̬̼͉̲̠̻̲̪ͣ̏̿̾͛̃̍͟͢͞ͅ
Spike exploded, the AJ said "APPLES!". Is this a reference to ASDF? (And now, the funniest thing you've ever seen, from really far away.)
5696756 who said I was running? I LOVE pain!
For so long, it had been gone... after 60 years of therapy, his life had finally regained a semblance of normalcy... and then the poor man heard those terrifying lyrics once again...
i38.photobucket.com/albums/e123/CrystalFanArt/caps/frog000072.png
And knew that the Space Balls weren't far behind...
There was no hope...
Well, she had a Michael J. Fox thing. Specifically, his attire. Close, Maniac92. Very close.
Pinkie's pun here made me think of this.
Somewhere out in the multiverse, Alfred sneezed.