How far will one stallion run to escape what pursues him?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I am loving the new style. It adds more depth. I say continue with what you are doing and it will become easier over time.
5497931
Thank you
Your welcome.
Every time you update, I get irritated at myself for not really acting on any of the story ideas I have. I rarely get a paragraph down before going "haha nope this is shit I am shit everything is shit" and shutting the window, and THIS story is starting to creep up on 500 chapters. You're making the inferior mortals around you feel underaccomplished. I hope you're happy, Kudzu.
Now, about the chapter itself...
The new writing style is interesting, I like both of them, this one seems more relaxed in comparison.
Uncomfortable Pina is uncomfortable. Was the theme of this chapter mostly about morals/ethics? It seemed to be that way... I have some character sketches that I need to upload. I've been drawing a lot of Thistle lately.
So Did Spike just grow a little bit, or did he have another Greed Growth?
5497981
Actually, the morals and ethical thing is really just a conversation that happens to take place that shows Sentinel's depth of character... the sort of pony he really is on the inside.
By looking at this conversation and picking it apart, a lot of things can be determined about Sentinel, his character, and maybe a bit of his growth.
The most obvious thing might be to say that Sentinel is really, really interested in this stuff, which is quite a interesting fact unto itself.
5498001
A tiny bit of greed growth that spurred some development.
That isn't a bad thing... this time he grew just a tiny bit for the right reasons.
5497962
[snark]His welcome what?[/snark]
5497932
I agree with Big Slick. I've always been a character driven writer and reader, and I truly love depth in characters (why do you think you get so many character thought probing questions from me?). I personally prefer this narrative style over your old one, and I love the in depth version you did for the previous chapter when we sink into the thoughts and feelings of one character for a chapter.
Definitely keep it up.
5498026 ahhhh. I forgot to reply directly to his thanks
5498047
Heh, I was just twitting you on the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. No harm, no foul.
I'm actually enjoying this new writing style more, it seems more relaxed and free flowing if that makes sense.
5498078
Free floating dialog fixed on POV does seem to allow for more flow... but I am worried that readers might not always know who is speaking... which means I need to add more visual clues, which really isn't a bad thing, it'll make my writing more descriptive.
Changes the pacing and another of other factors though. I think my feelings on it remain mixed because I have conflicting opinions on what it does to my writing workflow. It actually takes twice as long to make 2k words, but that is only because this is new and I'm still hammering it out. Eventually, that should change.
5498021 basically he had a small growth spurt?
5498099
A teeny tiny one. Yes. Due to greed. His friends are his hoard.
Know what happens if you mess with a dragon's hoard?
to go
5498013
Well, from the tone of Babs' and Pińa's conversation about how Earth Ponies should act and Spike's thought process it seemed to be heading in that direction.
5498118
Already fixed!
5498119
Hmm, a pleasant bit of serendipity!
5498119
Also, Babs was having a moment due to her conditioning after her 'experience,' followed by her new conditioning put in place by Luna.
For a short lesson in what happens when you threaten a dragons hoard, read the battle sequence in Nyx's Family by RealityCheck
5498160
they can also see the comic representatoon, specifically this page and the ones after it.
I like the new writing style, somehow feels easier to follow.
Okay, enough of the unsure messages. Use the damn style and we'll give you feed back when we're god damn good and ready. Holy shit! It's good! People agree with that statement, some don't. It's just like writing something that changes the status quo of the story completely. All those times you did that you didn't fucking hesitate in making the change, the hell is different about this?
I´ll try to expose my thoughs uppon your style changing...again, take on account my limitations as a non-native english speaker.
First of all, very, very enjoyable. Things run smoother. Saying that would lead to think that the former style was somewhat a little...not sure wich word to use. The opposite of smooth. That´s not completly true BUT, indeed, sometimes, within a chapter the rythim was broke several times. I always though it was intentional. Create a scene, stop the scene, restart the scene. Something nedeed to make your readers understand all the depth of what was happening in the story. But, now, maybe, it was just a vice of yours. Not bad at all but, if you allow me to say, it´s a little hard to read in the old style, since this new style is so MUCH more natural !
But, in the other hand, I can see you having problems with situations with lots of chars at the same time, like this scene. You have a tendency of going from one focus, or one group of chars to another and coming back, and forth, and, without a lot of references, this can be very confusing. In this chapter you handled the issue very well. But, in the other hand, I noticed that you broke the larger group in smaller sub-groups, with two, at most, characters. I wonder what happens when you got a scene with lots of ponies at the same time, everypony interacting with one another, like in The Isles, where this happened a lot.
All in all, it´s nice to see your develeopment as a writer. Great job as alwyas. Ah, and Sentinel....
NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD !!!!!!!11
Sorry, my inner bully took me;
Twilight is gonna flip out over Spike's new look.
5499013 In the show, during the alicornification, you can see that she, indeed, disappears, and there are ashes in the ground where she was, in the Magicam Mistery Cure episode...the author only give his vision of the alicornification from the show.
5498832 Is it bad i read the NERD part in Piccolos voice from DBZ Abridged?
Well, now that I compared a bit, if say I like this style better!
More school chapters...
5499819
The new avatar is mesmerising...
Wow, there is a massive bump up in Dislikes. People hate you, Kudzu. I don't know why so much hate needs to be spread, but they do it and they are assholes. I want to hunt them down and do things that would damn me to drown for eternity. I see so much beauty in your writing, your pure ability to pump out so much beautiful so fast and then these fucktards appear and dis so much, they rage and they hurt.
I will see to it that I make myself quite clear. Any dislikes that does not explain why they disliked this comment. Well, I'll assume you are one of those fucktards. (Unless your a supporter and don't like my bluntness.) By disliking and not stating why, I curse you to slave for eternity, I curse that you will please the evil father and I curse you to be forsaken by the Lord of Light himself.
Please stop your actions. I do not voluntarily wish suffering on anyone, but we all have our limits and people that hurt others for the sake of doing it, is where I cross the line.
Is person supposed to be pony?
I don't know if is a mistake or done on purpose?
What encouraged you to mix up your writing style?
Instead of feeling like an outsider with
...oh feck.
Hmmm. Ethics are external and morals are internal. I'll need to remember that one.