• Member Since 25th Feb, 2014
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kudzuhaiku


She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.

Sequels8

Comments ( 39513 )

lol this is good. i enjoy this i dare say almost as much as 'to dance in shadow'

4289268 i would like, no I DEMAND more. dont think i dont see that 'incomplete' in the description! the show must go on!

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I chose Berry Punch as my Numbskull!

So she will be added to the Point of View story.

I love it! This got me chuckling in a way few stories ever have!:rainbowlaugh:

Orc loves elf. Film at eleven. :raritywink:

A most enjoyable ethnosocial Rashomon thus far. And it stars best pony, which is always a bonus. Part of me thinks that the tribes should be better integrated after so many centuries living with one another, but the rest is having too much fun to care. I eagerly look forward to more.

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I was wondering how you'd work in the third Hearth's Warming Eve quote. It'll definitely be interesting to see the earth pony perspective on this mess.

I would really like it if Derpy try as hard as possible to make him understand her feelings and him playing the one whos hard to get, but giving her a chance eventually.
I hope this get not to fast in the lovemaking direction, i just want to get a few more cute scenes with Derpy, i would even like her to be a bit shy later if they should really having a date or something like that.:twilightsmile:

And here i want to thank you for another good looking Derpy fanfic:derpytongue2::heart:

PS: Lately i enjoyed some conflicts and a somehow Derpy is cute if she is sad sometimes and even more cute if she´s feeling better after that if she get a good message or something like that.

I was pretty interested in you're creation of pony sociology and defining the differences between unicorns and pegasi. It also helps you're using everyone's favorite background pony, Derpy!:derpytongue2:

It was cool just reading how Derpy is trying to show effection for Bucky but a cultural barrier that she just doesn't understand because it's not common knowledge to her is getting in the way and that you mention she basically raised her daughters (always love fics that make both Dinky and Sparkler as her daughters) as pegasi and as a result they don't seem to get along with their fellow unicorns. It's a small detail, but really intrigued me and I always love stuff that like that helps broaden the world.

Really looking forward to the next chapter.

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More fun tidbits.

As mentioned, I also plan to have Berry Punch in the story, as well as Piña Colada, her little sister.

I am planning on the slightly more innocent and slightly less socially conditioned foals to also have a point of view of various events.

And, I plan to have Bucky teach Sparkler more about being a unicorn while Sparkler teaches Bucky about being a pegasus. Read at yer own risk!

This story will also deal with various mating practices of ponies... Not in just a sexual sense, but in the cultural sense. There will be some frank moments where different species try and figure out just what in the hell is going on.

Edit. I really screwed up this post. Now corrected. Sodding hell.

super fantastical work as always kudz! (if i may call you that)

Hhhhmmmm.... Yes, yes.... This pleases the Spoon... Fed me more of your unique and engaging tale!!!:flutterrage::derpytongue2:

Also, shame on you Dash! Some ponies find the term groundpounder offensive!:rainbowderp:

This is... Really good.

REALLY good.

This sounds very unusual. I like unusual things.

This whole story reminds me of this.

Ahh i thought he would resist a little bit longer, but i like it, Derpy is sweet but i really like her (I don´t know what went wrong) or sad moments:derpytongue2::heart:
It is not the first time, every time it sound like somepony just used Derpy for a night and hen disappeared. I mean just sleep one night with her and then run for your live, is this some kind of official story for her having children and no Coltfriend? I just wondering because it is not the first time it sound like that for me.

Liking it so far. The Pegasi flock-mentality, and their being more physical than Unicorns, was great.
Derpy's really cute and sweet here, and the racial misunderstandings are funny.:twilightsmile:

As a Derpy enthusiast, I can say without a doubt that this is one of the best Derpy shipping stories I have read on the site. Absolutely love it.

I will be eagerly waiting for the next chapter.

he has such a lucky stallion

'was' a lucky stallion, perhaps?

Well, this is certainly different courting styles. I may have to steal them.

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Narf! Poit!

I cannot believe I flubbed that and then missed it during editing. Thanks, fixed, have one of these! :heart:

“He left me high and dry, and all I have of him is Dinky,”

Just Dinky, or is Sparkler from another stallion?

There seems to be a problem with this chapter. There's no next button!

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All in due time.. I am fixing the next button problem right now, finishing up the editing and adding some final touches.

More excellent exploration of the different mentalities of the tribes. Makes me wonder how many misunderstandings there have been among the Mane Six. In any case, eagerly looking forward to more.

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Well, think about loyalty from a pegasus standpoint, a deeply ingrained need to stick together as flock to survive a world filled with dragons and other pony eating creatures.

Now think about Rarity and how snobby she might appear to be...

Food for thought!

Reminds me very much so of There She Is!
I really, really love this interpretation of pony culture! It's all so very new, I can practically see it shining and sparkling.:twilightblush:

And now I want to slap Cheerilee. She's a damn school teacher! She should listen and be unbiased.

Oh, and DT deserved it.

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Wait, look at this from Cheerilee's prospective.

She is simply being a mediator and keeping the foals in her care from fighting.

She isn't the villain. :heart:

Oh, and at least one person has no soul and hates Derpy Hooves.

:fluttershbad::fluttershyouch::fluttercry:

4294158 But not listening to both sides? When I was in school, even if I was in the wrong, the teachers listened to each story.

I'd be bringing a formal complaint against her in this case.

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Next chapter actually deals with this from Cheerilee's perspective... Briefly.

Next chapter will also feature Sparkler. Moody teenaged filly Sparkler, who has trouble figuring out her place in the world.

lol i feel like theres a theme here...
"pegasi are brutes"
"unicorns are snobs"
"earth ponies are numbskulls"
:derpytongue2:

Will there be a perspective from Spike?
So we can see the perspective of a non-Pony, like a dragon (Which would be very different, seeing as they're predators, not ponies)

Aaaand here we have Cheerilee being a typical teacher, who freaks the actual fuck out the moment anyone steps visibly out of line while completely ignoring anything she can't be sued for going on.

One thing to look out for is starting almost every paragraph with a proper noun (especially someones name). It's a fairly common thing and an easy trap to fall into if you don't look out for it. While not technically wrong, it does make the story less interesting as each paragraph starting out the same way makes for a boring read. Here's a good example chunk to show case this from story:

Piña Colada sat outside the schoolhouse.....

Dinky was always looking out for her.....

Dinky, even though she was a unicorn.....

Piña Colada felt a twang of frustration.....

Piña Colada began to dance.....

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were the worst.....

Piña Colada actually burst into tears.....

Piña Colada had no way of knowing that earth ponies had.....

I guess my question is how do unicorns fit into pack mentality. I guess unicorns seem more individualistic when you consider Twilight or Rarity who mostly seem to work on their own. You've discussed how earth ponies and pegasi in a pack fit together.

Well I'm sure you'll inform us in time as the story developes.

Again, I'm really intrigued by how your describing the differences between the three pony races and how they interact with each other.

Super interesting story :pinkiehappy:

Hm... I am curious, and hope that Cheerilee eventually gets set straight.

hmm judging by the description this seems very familiar to me... I just can't put my-

-ah yes there we go!:rainbowlaugh:

Well somehow i understand cheerilee, but i am mad with her beeing so stubborn about the swat.
I wonder how she never notice one of diamonds bullying moments.

The chapters can´t come fast enough, i like the story Derpy is just......Derpy and thats reason enough to like her:derpytongue2::heart::heart:
I see Derpy in the position to fall in love with Bucky first.
And i would like to see Bucky, that he not understand the sign of her love right away.

Somehow i want to have a really heart warming moment if Derpy confessed her love for him later, i mean it is just cute if she is maybe a little bit affraid, because she think´s she could be rejected again.

(I don´t know Sparkler enough yet, is she not Twilights daughter in some fanfics?)

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Oh crap, this is a thing now?

Sigh.

One more thing to make effort on to bring my writing into modern usage. Thanks.

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Haha was reading this with the William tell Overture and the Can Can dance from the beginning:derpytongue2:.

both work just fine withe love starving Derpy:derpyderp1: in hot persuit of her scared to death escaping stallion.:rainbowlaugh:

4293788 From what I can gather from the first chapter, I think Sparkler is adopted, I hope I'm correct.

Hm... How dare you... make a story I find so-far enjoyable from the get-go. :rainbowlaugh:

Hm... *thanks the author, Pegasus style!*

...so why the hell was Diamond Tiara allowed back? The little bitch should have been expelled, let alone suspended.

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Ponies are too loving and forgiving.

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What the author said.

I usually don't like comedy around here as it is often times made to be unrealistically ridiculous, but you've managed to make a scenario funny and believable... I will give it a thumbs-up.

The picture caught my attention. The premise caught my curiosity. The first chapter caught my interest.

Well played sir. :moustache:

“So when are you two going to do something? All of this talking is boring!”

Yes get on with it!

Jesus, how are you updating so fast? You've produced four chapters and the first one went up yesterday.

I enjoyed reading Sparkler's perspective and how she feels lost being a unicorn born to an earth pony mother and in the care of her adoptive pegasus mother. It's not surprising she feels so confused.

Well, look forward to the next update.

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Let's see, several chapters of this, a chapter of To Dance In Shadow, a chapter for Set in Stone, and Flight of the Scootaloo.

Probably over 10k words today. :pinkiecrazy:

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