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A reckless narrator, a careless Twilight, and the foretold apocalypse walk into a bar.

Where the heck is the punchline?


Please read the whole story in the voice of the narrator from the Stanley Parable, as it makes it that much more amazing. Thank you.

As always, I would like to thank my editors: Doctor, Disco, Doctor Disco, and incompetence.

Adieu.

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Twilight Sparkle, former up and comer of the scientific world, now disgraced, is exiled to Ponyville at the command of the Scholar Queen. To live out the rest of her days there, far away from the capital.

Yet, it is not all dark and horrible here. There is happiness to be found even now, with the Everfree only a handful of yards from her doorstep. There are friends to be made. There is her assistant, Spigor, faithful as always. There are problems that have lain dormant for a millennium, that have been waiting for someone just clever enough to solve them.

Just the sort of thing to keep her busy.

(This is a retelling of the MLP story, set in a gothic horror-esque universe. For the purposes of this story the characters are human.

And Spigor is pronounced Spy Gore. It's a portmanteau of Spike and Igor.)

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Two minor villains, two heinous crimes, one cramped cell, and one very nerdy pony out to prove she can work friendship's magic too.
But will Spoiled Rich and Lightning Dust actually learn the value of friendship? Whatever happens, Moondancer's sure it will make an excellent case study and that she can deal with the ethics board.

Takes place around the time of Grannies Gone Wild.

Warning: While not directly shown, rape will be a major theme.

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We're playing the best mix of the Heartsongs from across the dimensions. Shippers take care, for your OTP'S are here!!!!! We're all about love and tolerance at WCSR and for us all OTP'S are in fact the one true pairing. So keep a water bucket handy and put those flame wars out!!!!! YEAH!!!!! DJ Nylarhotep says it all about the LOVE!!!!! Now on with the music.

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One day, Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Apple Bloom receive a message and a package from a pony they don’t recognize. Inside is a vest, an ugly, highly reflective, bright orange safety vest. Alongside is an apology for an event they don’t remember, and the words “Hope gives you wings.” Confused, they take the vest and the letter to Twilight, who tells Scootaloo to put the vest on in order to finally receive the real gift…

(References an event and character from The Mask of Despair, but you don’t have to read it to get this story. If you care, this is the relevant scene.)

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Once upon a time, Luna had a student. Once upon a time, Sombra was a colt.

Once upon a time, those names were free of sin.

--

I asked the lovely WithoutCommonSense for permission to use her art for my cover.

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Falling in love while falling to your death? Easy.

Staying in love when you're firmly planted on the ground? Harder.

Starlight and Sunset only ever learned how to fall. Now they have to figure out how to get up again.


An entry into Oroboro's Sunset Shipping Contest: Journeys.

Edited by Rose Quill and DrakeyC.

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Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich are having a party off, in order to decide who is the best party pony Equestria. A competition Maud Pie joins, with the intent of winning.

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In an attempt to stay on top of any potential crisis, Twilight starts reading up on as many legends as she can.

One in particular catches her interest, even though it didn't even have a full paragraph of description.

Perhaps Celestia knows what exactly this "Slayer" is?

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When a colt has an unusual request for Cloudy Mind, will she finally discover her special talent and earn her mark?



Edit: Sorry the cover pic is upside down, not sure how to fix it.

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