This story is a sequel to Celestia's New Assistant

He makes Discord look sane. Most ponies resent him. He is the most chaotic thing to ever live.

Will he save Equestria? Will he doom it? Will Citrus Fruit be involved? More then Likely. Beware, he is...The Human.

"I simultaneously want to know what's going through your head when writing this, and don't want to know what could inspire this." -Love the Changeling

"MOST. RANDOM. STORY. EVER." -jackofalltradez

"I mean... stare too long into the abyss and the abyss stares into you, and the abyss has skittles apparently" -ShadowsAndDust

After being tricked into using a forbidden spell to enter the void, Damon Lipton is turned into a Lich and thrown into Equestria by the God of Mischief. Dorian the Deranged. The God mistaking Damon for a follower of his.

Now stuck in Equestria, Damon finds himself thrown into a series of bizarre and epic adventures that will change his life, and those around him, for the better. And quite possibly for the worse.

Cover art is done by me.

Thanks to DVAN56, Berry Punch, Rainbowbob and Bocaj518

I'm... not sure what happened. I remember the unicorn guy, what was his name? Starmswill the Tearded? I don't know, names are kinda off for me right now. So anyway, there I was with this unicorn then, BOOM! I found myself in the middle of his laboratory, albeit ruined.

Bit strange, isn't it?

So I started to walk, following this odd looking stripey thing, and found this cute little town. Seriously, it's utterly adorable.

And that's when I saw her, the lovely Celestia... ah, it sends my gears a flutter! Although I don't know who the blue alicorn is... or the lavender one... wait, I don't know anyone here apart from Celestia!

Thanks to Infinite Carnage for pre-reading and Draconian Soul with help on Zecora. Go check out their stuff! Cover art was done by myself.

And there came a day unlike any other-
When champions found themselves in Equestria united against a common threat.
On that day, they became heroes.
The invincible viking, Dovahkiin.
"What's a viking?" asked the dragonborn, turning to look at the the other champions.
Soma Cruz, Prince of Darkness.
"Hey, no- Just his incarnation/split soul/potential something or other," said Soma, arms thrown out to the side in a shrug. Even he was not sure what to call his situation.
The Dan, angriest hero there is.
"I have a last name you know- And who is talking anyway?" Dan had each of hands resting over both hips to look around.
Nathan Drake, fortune hunter and historian extraordinaire.
"I still don't know who Daring Do is supposed to be," Nate questioned with a raised eyebrow.
And Phoenix Wright, the first Avenger.
"That's copyright infringement! But we do need a team name..." Phoenix rubbed his chin in thought.
Humans, Assemble!
"You are not helping Pinkie Pie!"

(Interlude II is a mini guide if you want info and pics on the humans appearing in this story... So far.)
(Hey, don't be afraid to leave comments.)

You'd think that being trapped in stone would mean that, if nothing else, I could get some peace and quiet. Unfortunately, it seems that Celestia has other ideas.

She has appointed these ponies... these 'Keepers', as she calls them, to keep me entertained during my incarceration.

Honestly? I'd prefer the boredom.

Cover art by matrosha123
Spanish Translation by SPANIARD KIWI found here

The Elements of Harmony are defeated and Nightmare Moon stands on Equestria's throne as their new Queen. Is Equestria doomed to suffer through night time eternal or will they be... perfectly fine? Twilight finds her new job as slave or "personal assistant" to her new ruler to be a bit maddening. But is this evil sarcastic queen really as bad as she originally believed? And just how many others are diabolical enough to cash in on the change in staff? Can Nightmare truly run a peaceful Equestria? Let me just answer all these questions right here in the description...

Click this to read about the hiatus.

We’ve all had nightmares, but do any of us actually know where they come from?

What if, one day, you woke up as the embodiment of nightmares themselves?

In an alley one night, Joseph gets fatally injured after saving a woman from her terrifying nightmares.

He wakes up somehow, but he quickly finds out that he isn’t in his own body. Instead, he wakes up in the body of one of Equestria's most infamous villains.

Joseph must adapt to a world completely alien to him, as well as adjusting to his new body while trying to figure out what, or who he is.

Featured 13/08 & 14/08/14
Update Feature: 4/10/15, 01/06/16, 17/8/16, 4/12/16, 30/1/17

'Sex' tag added for strong cases of innuendo.
'Dark' tag because this fic deals with morose themes.

Edited and proofread by:
Requiem17
Blue Blaze {COMET}
The Abyss
thesaviour711
Twisted Code
Waffle God
Arcane Spirit
Samaru163
Updated as people help. Includes one-time favours and single chapters.

A/N: Tags will be updated as necessary. Constructive criticism and ego stroking are both welcome. Set both in a world where MLP doesn't exist, and after the events of first two episodes of season one. A show-accurate period of events is not likely.

You know all those stories about cos-players disappearing? Well this is kinda like those. Jason Hughes was just a normal guy attending a con for the first time. Of course he had to buy that omnitrix replica right? Well now he's stuck in a world of talking ponies and has to learn what it means to be a pony.

**This somehow got on the popular stories list on 8/16/14, which is only a day after I published it. Thats a new one*

**So this got featured on 8/17/14 I have no idea how that happened but thanks everyone!**

Big thanks to m2pt5 for taking on the role of proofreader/editor. Also want to thank DuskShadowBrony for being my other editor.

"The bloody Captain had me clean the Princess's private lavatory last night for smoking on duty. It doesn't seem bad I know, but given she had another one of her bloody cake binges last night... it took me hours to scrub that sh*t off the ceiling..."

Meet Copper Hand, a Private in the Royal Guard. (Not by choice.)

Take a journey into his life through his journal entries that detail the horror thrill there is to being one of Celestia's finest.

A simple series of short journal entries. Humanized ponies, rated teen for language and some sexual related comments.

Pre-read by RainbowBob and DVAN56 Edits done by Bad_Seed_72. Go give them some love!

Inspired by the art by the fantastic egophilliac, go check her art out and her awesome blog!

Celestia wants Twilight and her friends to loosen up a little bit around her. Luna just wants to try the hard cider. During a surprise visit to Sweet Apple Acres at the tail end of cider season, Princess Luna has just a bit too much to drink, and when she makes a rather inappropriate joke, Twilight comes to the very uncomfortable realization that she has never seen Celestia excuse herself to use the restroom.