Humans Assemble!

by Mistershield

Side Story H

The Mistershield Ending

Ashley Williams sat down on a chair, looking over Ponyville. At this point, humans were well established and were being treated as a common thing. He moved the prosthetic hand up, waving to the ponies as they greeted him. While not one to smile, he found this place peaceful as ponies treated them all with respect, and not to mention welcomed. It almost made the salesman not want to go back home. If they only had better beer…

“Ash?”

“Hm?” The deadite slayer turned to look at Mayor Mare and smiled. “Oh, what’s up there your Mayorness?” The gray maned pony walked over to sit down next to the male, moving a hoof to her glasses.

“I have a question for you.” The Mayor smiled a bit, and then raised a hand to order some tea from the cafe they were at. Ash merely nodded, as if to wait for the question. “Alright. You said you had no one waiting for you back home. I understand you live the life of a slayer and bachelor.”

“Well, that’s one way of putting it.” Ash nodded to the waiter pony as a lemonade and a tea were brought for them.

“So, what would you say if I came back to your home?”

“The hell?” Ash stopped reaching for the glass, glad he was not drinking out of it.

“Please, just think about it a moment. What if ponies could go back with our champions? We owe you a lot, and it’s only fair we do the same.” The Mayor smiled, a bit sheepishly as Ash crushed the lemoda glass with his hand.

“Well uh…” Ash blinked a second, and raised his head to think about it.

______________________________________

A little girl cracked some eggs on a skillet, letting them cook at a steady heat. She had gray hair, and looked about 7. She was smiling, looking into the eggs when she got a spatula ready to pull the eggs out. She was smiling, when all the sudden, she had to stop and look over at the other skillet. Hay bacon was being burned and sending smoke into the plane.

“Oh no!” Sunny quickly moved to get the skillet off the fire and slide the hay bacon on a plate. “Auntie is going to be-”

“The Great and Powerful Auntie smells something burning!” Trixie walked into the kitchen, earning some chickens to cluck at her. She frowned a bit, looking over at Sunny and sigh. “Child, you have no reason to cook my bacon… Just let your uncles eat the eggs you make.”

“But I want us to eat together like a family,” Sunny sighed. “I want Snake and Otacon to eat with smiles.”

“Dear Sunny,” Trixie walked up to the child dressed in gray. She moved the eggs off the stove using magic, and then looked at her face. “I think your uncles are a bit busy at the moment.”

“Doing what?”

“Ok Twilight, Snake will take you into the field, and then use you as a gatling laser gun,” Otacon explained, lifting a laser pointer to illustrate Princess Twilight being used as a gun.

“But I thought this was a stealth mission?” Twilight said, cheeks blushing again.

“They will have no countermeasures for an almighty alicorn princess,” Snake nodded.

___________________________________

“I dunno about this,” Nathan said, releasing a sigh. He was sitting down on a bench, looking over at his long lost brother. “There’s no way I could tell me wife about this. I mean, the lost treasure of a pirate king? Libertalia? Captain Avery?” By this point in time, the adventure had retired from the life of excitement and danger.

“Speaking of which, when were you going to tell me you married… the uh… “ Sam stopped a moment, looking down at the picture of Rarity and Nathan on his brother’s cell phone. “Little Lady?”

“I got enough sass from Sully, ok?” Nathan released a sweatdrop. Just then, the phone rang. Both brothers blinked once, and slowly Nate took the phone. “Rarity?”

“YOU BETTER NOT BE PLACING YOUR LIFE IN DANGER AGAIN!” The phone then hung up, and Sam raised a eyebrow at his brother.

“How does she know?”

_________________________________

“I was named after the sound a lion makes. You know: rroarrrr! Really!” Hroar replied.

“Oh ho ho!” Dovakiin grinned, giving nod. His left hand moved out, resting on the boy’s shoulder and then turn to look at the matron of the orphanage. “This one has gumption! I’ll adopt him.”

“Really?” Hoar asked, lifting his head up and look at his new “Dad”. The Dragonborn? “You mean it? Wow, thanks! I promise, I won’t be any trouble at all! Just… Let me go get my things and say goodbye to everyone. I’ll meet you at home. Thanks! Thanks again!”

“Such a good lad,” Dovahkiin said, glad to be a father. “I’d adopt them all, my wife wants a large family.”

“No no, your generosity and kind heart does well to just take one child. Best to see if you can even handle Hroar for now,” Constance nodded.

“You are right. I best go see my new son say hello to his new mother.” The Dovahkiin then fast traveled, going to his home in Riften. Upon moving to open the door, he blinked and looked down at Hroar as he was partly blocking the entrance. “Hroar?”

“What’s gotten in ya britches?” Applejack asked, eyebrow raised at the little boy. “Is it the apron?” She looked down at the apron she was wearing as she stepped away from the oven. “Yeah, Ah reckon it’s strange to see clothes on a pony.” The poor boy had his mouth open as his things were in a heap in front of himself.

“You can talk?! You’re my new mom?!” Hroar finally managed, pointing at the pony.

“Hey, don’t talk to your mother like that. Do you want a timeout?” Dovahkiin frowned.

_____________________________________

“This is…” Julius had to take a second to stop, looking down as Mina had leaned down to hug Fluttershy and grin. For her own, Fluttershy moved a hoof out to hug Mina back. “Surreal.”

“That is one way to put it,” Alucard answered, turning to look over at Soma. “Where did…”

“It’s a long story,” Soma replied, smiling at the sight of Mina and Fluttershy’s meeting. “I’ll tell you after-”

“So who are you?” Mina asked, pulling away from Fluttershy.

“Oh, I’m Soma’s special some pony,” Fluttershy said, not at all shy to admit her relationship status. Julius tilted his head to the side as his gaze turned into confusion. Alucard raised an eyebrow, while Mina turned to look at Soma as her eyes started to give a malicious glint.

“Special Some Pony?” Mina asked in a really low voice.

“Oh, it means we are in a romantic relationship!” Fluttershy explained, immune to the strange looks Soma was getting. Soma raised his left hand up in a defensive manner, before rushing off with the help of panther soul.

“Soma, you get back here and explain!” Mina cried out.

_____________________________________

Pinkie Pie jumped up and down, following behind Dan. The small man had a large box of fireworks, ammo clips and belts, and other weapons as he headed down the street.

“Excuse me sir,” a police officer called out to the duo.

“Hm?” Dan stopped a moment, turning to look at the cop. “Oh hey, there is no law that that says I can’t carry explosives!” Pinkie stopped, turning to sit down and look at the cop with a smile.

“Listen, I was going to ask about the pony-” The officer stopped, both eyebrows raised to look down at the box Dan carried. “You have explosives?”

“Um… no,” Dan’s eyes quickly darted left and right, “these are props for the theater.”

“Oh! You are heading towards the Shakespearean Theater, “ the police officer nodded, buying the explanation. “Actually, that pony can’t-”

“But I thought we were going to burn that theater down, Danny,” Pinkie Pie said as she peeked over Dan’s shoulder.

“Wait, that pony can talk?”

“Pinkie, run!” Dan ran off with the box over his head as Pinkie took off behind him. The police officer had his hand out, mouth agape in confusion.

__________________________________

“Let me…” The old bald Judge had to take a moment to reflect, eyes wide open to look over at Rainbow Dash hovering at the defendant's stand. “Am I understand you wish to give this pegasus citizenship status Mr. Wright?”

“Yes your honor,” Phoenix replied, large grin on his face. Each hand was at his sides, confident that he could win this court case.

“I’m more than awesome enough to be a citizen!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed.

“This is most unorthodox!” The Judge exclaimed, blinking once. “What say you Mr. Edge- What the?” He turned to look at Miles Edgeworth, who had his arms crossed on his chest. Lighting Dust was at his side.

“I have been looking through law books, your honor. And while animals can be granted Trustee status,” (This is true, look it up.) Edgeworth raised his head to look back at Phoenix. “The fact that these winged ponies are not natively born from our world, the only way they can become citizens are if they marry a current citizen or go through the legal status.” Edgeworth raised his hand up to shake his index finger. “But now is not the question of marriage, it is if these ponies are eligible to be given the same rights as humans.”

“These ponies?” The Judge asked.

“That is correct, if Phoenix wins, I intend for miss Lighting Dust to be given the same status.”

“Go Edgeworth!” Lighting Dust cried out with a hoof pump.

“I can’t believe,” The Judge released a sigh. “Since both sides of the case are so serious about this, so be it. It’s been my motive to be a professional and hear all cases equally, no matter how outlandish they become.” He raised his head to spot as the crowd was filled with to the brim with people wanting to look at the ponies. “Let this case begin.”

_____________________________________

“YOU SHALL KNOW OUR VENGANCE, TINY HUMAN. KNOW THAT YOUR SCIENCE SHALL FACE THE TERROR OF THE NIGHT!”

Travis smiled, arms crossed on his chest as Luna begun to use magic blasts to tear down the mechanical armor that held the man that ran the Assassin’s Game.

“Are- Are you sure about this?” Henry Cooldown looked over at his twin.

“When Luna found out what was going on,” Travis shrugged as Luna continued to trash the building. “I couldn’t stop her.”

“THOU SHALL NEVER AGAIN END THE LIFE OF ANOTHER!”

“And uh, what happens after than?” Henry asked as he winced at the sounds of nightmares filling the air.

“Dunno. Take Luna on a singing tour?”

“Why?” Henry once again asked, both hands moving to hold his head.

“Moe…”

___________________________________

“...” Cloud Strife closed both eyes, looking over at Sephiroth. Currently, the two of them were at Hercule’s Coliseum. At the moment, Lyra had her chin resting on Sephiroth’s lap as he petted her mane.

“What is it?” The last Cetra asked.

“I was going to challenge you,” Cloud managed a response, and then pointed at Lyra with his sword. “I’m not sure what is going on.”

“Oh look Sephy! You made a friend!” Lyra said, head picking up to look over Cloud.

“Do it in the coliseum. I’m busy,” Sephiroth replied as he scratched under Lyra’s chin. Tifa had her arms fall to her side as her mouth fell open, standing next to Cloud. The young man opened both eyes and raised a hand to pinch the spot between his eyes.

__________________________________

Clark, Heidern, and Leona could only stare at Cheerilee. They all stood inside Hidern’s main flagship, in the command center.

“See, I told you that they would need a moment to process this,” Cheerilee frowned, turning to look over at Ralf. The soldier was sitting down on a chair, smiling at his friends. “There is no way that they are going to allow a stranger into their army.”

“Oh! I was expecting this! There’s going to be… huh?” Clark sat straight, looking over at his friend’s and mentor move.

“She is so cute!” Leona said, eyes closed to kneel down and hug the fuchsia pony to her chest.

“I must touch her ears,” Hidern comment, making his way to stand behind the pony and stroke her ears.

“...” Clark had a blush on his cheeks as he moved to the other side of the pony and lean his cheek in to rub against her muzzle. “So soft.”

“Hey get away from my-”

“Can we keep her?” Leona asked, interrupting Ralf. She smiled up at Hidern, who only nodded.

“We could use a strong symbol and mascot,” Clark said.

“So much affection,” Cheerilee remarked, her own cheeks turning red.

__________________________________

“And then, what happened?” Spike asked, sitting down on Jack’s lap. The two were sitting down under the shade of a tree, which had pink petals falling to the ground.

“I, left on a journey to find myself once more,” Jack replied, lifting his head to see as the sakura blossoms fall. “It took me a long time, but I came to terms. My people still needed me, and my katana must always be ready for the next danger.”

“But… it’s not fair Jack,” Spike said, his own head down. Did that mean he had no shot at Rarity?

“Life is like that, Spike.” He lowered his head to look at the young dragon. “But I loved her. And even though I suffered through so much in my life, I am glad that I was given the chance.” With a smile, he leaned his head down. “And who knows? I got to see you again. That alone, means I should have hope.”

“You know what?” Spike said, smiling and hugging his pseudo dad. “Why don’t we go looking for those time portals? With no Aku, that means alotta of them should be around.”

“You know what Spike?” Jack said as his eyebrows raised. “The thought never occurred to me. It would do me well to see how my future friends live now that the tyranny of Aku is gone.” Jack smiled and stood up, hand over his blade. “Come Spike. I know of one nearby.”

___________________________________

Blue Spy and company were resting inside their base. But they were not alone. Each of them had a pony at their side, laughing and doing their thing. Zecora and Spy were enjoying a corner window view as they read from a book. Scout and Spitfire were outside, Scout hitting some dingers out, only to have Spitfire go fetch the ball. Heavy went over Sasha, making sure she was at the ready as Sugar Belle placed a tray of cupcakes for him.

Meanwhile with the Red, Medic was patching up Demo. Redheart stood at his side as a dutiful nurse. Harshwhinny could only stare in shock at the way Demo’s chest was wide open. Engineer hummed a low tune as he played his instrument, serenading the shy Coco Pommel. The two were joined at the campfire with Sniper and Fleet Foot.

Everyone else was at the orgy.

____________________________________

“Sokka, are you sure about this?” Derpy asked.

“Trust me, with the two of us together, we are invincible!” Sokka cried out, space sword in his left hand raised up.

“So Sokka! Go Derpy!” Toph and Little Strongheart cried out.

“Ladies and gentlemen, let the Destruction Derby of the Firelord statues, begin!”

____________________________________

A small ball of red rushed past some vents, and then landed down with a few bounces on the ground. The red ball stopped spinning as the pony stood up, looking around. He was wearing a red battle suit, and a helmet covered the face from view.

“Samus, at the rende-zous whatchamacallits,” Red Macintosh called out.

“Good just stay there…” Samus replied.

The armored pony nodded once, and slowly begun to walk around. His left hoof moved up to display his canon and hold it at ready. This cold and icy looking facility looked barren and empty. His own steps made too much sound. “Samus?”

A figured jumped down, dressed in a varia suit. Big Mac turned to face and nod, letting his helmet slide off to show off his face. “Is it safe.” Almost immediately, the figured rushed forward to hug the pony. “Whut?”

An energy blast suddenly shot the figure off him, leaving Mac alone. “What the?”

“I knew my dark half could never resist you!” Samus cried out, using her cannon to fire again and again at her doppelganger.

“You used me as bait?!”

“It worked didn’t it Gum?”

____________________________________

Leon and Ashley could only stare at the little pony that had her trenchcoat open to show off her wares. Some grenades, a gun, flowers….

“Stranger, if you want to buy from me, you have to buy from her first.” Merchant said, behind his booth.

“Um, ok?” Leon said, kneeling down to face Daisy. “I don’t got much. Maybe I can sell you something?”

“What are ya sellin’?”

“I got some My Little Pony stickers..” Ashley said from behind Leon.

“I’ll buy it at a high price.”

______________________________________

Dumbledore was sitting down on a bed, looking over at Tom Riddle. It was quiet, and the headmaster could only listen at this disturbed young boy.

“Rodabra cadabra!”

“What the!” Dumbledore cried out, eyes opening in shock as Snape emerged from the invisibility cloak. Snape could only laugh in relief.

“What is this?” The old wizard cried out in confusion. “Why would you do that?”

“Take that you dark lord,” Snape said, his chest moving up and down as he took deep breaths. He had just used his wand to strike down Voldemort, who was still in his child state.

“Why would you do that?” Dumbledore asked, looking up at Snape.

“Evidence, Removal,” Snape called out to make the body vanish.

“Who are you?”

“Oh sorry about that. Just saving your life. In the future, and countless others.” Snape had ti take a breath and relax. “It’s a long story. Like so long, that if we wrote it all down, it would take at least seven books,” Snape said, lowering his wand to face the Headmaster.

“Or eight movies,” Discord said, waving at the two of them.

___________________________________

Dr. Who and Celestia were inside the T.A.R.D.I.S., moving through space and time. The princess could only look around the machine and smile in awe.

“So where… or should I say, when to now?” Celestia asked with a smile.

“Fish sticks and pudding.” The Doctor replied.

“Really?” Celestia frowned, eyes closed a little.

_____________________________________

“Alright, Galactus is coming,” Captain America said. His team of Deadpool and Phoenix were at the ready. “The Earth is at stake. We have to wi-”

Cracow!

Phoenix and Deadpool took a step back as Vergil rushed in, moving his left hand out in a punch to knockout Captain America. The half demon stood up to the two and nodded. “Let us fight together.”

“You just punched out the Cap!” Deadpool called out, both hands moving to slap his cheeks.

“Who are you?” Phoenix asked.

“Listen, we have no time,.” Vergil said as he drew his sword. “Deadpool, and you Phoenix, meet me in the future.”

“Oh! Were you sent back in time to make sure we stop Galactus?” Deadpool asked, already used to time shenanigans.

“Oh no. We meet in the future to save ponies.”

Phoenix leaned over to sweatdrop, while Deadpool lowered his hands as his eyes in his mask close a bit.

“Prove it!”

“You masturbate to a unicorn, Deadpool.”

Phoenix turned to look over at the vigilante and raise an eyebrow.

“Everyone knows that!” Deadpool defended himself. “Damn movie had to stop at that part.”

Bonus:

“That’s… something to think about,” Mayor Mare said. “And you Ash?”

“Oh well that’s easy. I would work at S-mart, and we would live off the land, nothing to tie us down,” Ash said, smiling.

(In his world.)

“I am going to kill you Ash!” Mayor Mare cried out, using a chainsaw to cut down a demon.

“Uh, Jefe,” Pablo said, using a shotgun to shoot out at another demon. “When you said you were going to use the Necronomicon for help, this is not what I was expecting.”

“It worked didn’t it!” Ash yelled out, rushing over to the Mare’s side. “Groovy.”

Author's Note:

Sorry if I missed a few. I did this as a writing excessive to get me back into the swing of things.

See you soon, dear Reader.

Comments

[Ink Sword]

I hope to see the next chapter in the near future. It has been over a year.

[Dirty Bit]

Welcome back again, friend. You almost had me thinking this was the last chapter. Each part was equally enjoyable.

[The REAL Mister Pkmn]

Finally, a step towards a continuation!