• Published 16th Jun 2018
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Dadonequus Discord (Book 2) - CrazedLaughter



With the exodus of Chrysalis, Anon's life finally starts to go back to normal. Or rather, as normal as it can be when being the adopted son of the spirit of chaos. But new problems await him. What they are? Who knows...

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Chapter 74 - Discord Knew

He was inching ever so closer, prepping his talons to pierce you in a way you swear would be worse than death. You had to think of something or else your ass was grass!

“Any last words, Anon?” One asks you, as his talons began to glow a sinister red. He looked at you with a dark and hungry gaze, ready to take what he felt was his.

SHIT! C’mon Anon! He’s a Discord clone, right? You could tell by his fading and cracking body that he was getting weaker. If you could just get your leg loose, you could zap him with the hook. But all you could do was speak, and that wasn’t gonna get you anywhere. It’s not like he’d just fall for… Oh wait, maybe he would fall for the trick everyone fucking falls for. “Uhhh, OH NO, BEHIND YOU! IT’S CHRYSALIS AGAIN!”

“Are you serious? It could be anything and I wouldn’t fall for that stupid trick. So much for Discord’s little prodigy. At least I will become a better Draconequus than him through you.” He says, unamused and undeterred by your simple trick.

SHIT! SHIT! You began to dart your eyes around. You needed something, anything. You then look to Starlight, who was still struggling in her bonds. This guy, he was obsessed with her. Would this work instead? “STARLIGHT?! STARLIGHT! YOU’RE NOT MOVING! OH GOD, THE CHAINS MUST HAVE CHOKED HER!”

“COMMANDER!” Commander said in fright as he dropped you from his magical hold to make sure Starlight was fine. She was, still struggling to get free from his bonds. “Oh… You’re fine. Ugh, don’t tell me I fell… Hmm, what’s this?” One said as he looked around his torso, you had already decided to fire the hook around him as soon as you were able.

“Ha! I knew that’d work! No matter who you are, you all always fall for the same dumb trick. As for this? Well, you’ll be in for quite a SHOCK!” Ok, you really had to stop with the puns. But whatever, you flick the switch, and send the magical electric surge through the line.

One just looks at you with a bored expression, raising an eyebrow as he began to do an unenthused clap. “Bravo, Anon, you once again made a bad move. But you were right, it was shocking. Shockingly foolish that you’d think this would work against me. Now then, give me your essence!” One raised his talons at you, preparing to steal your chaotic life force once more.

FUCKING HELL! THAT SHOULD HAVE WORKED! You just keep the line surging in a desperate attempt to finally hurt him as you try to come up with a plan. But alas, you hesitate too much as One’s talons shoot out claws directly towards… And through you. Wait, what? You looked at yourself after the flash of talons hit your eyes, yet you seemed fine. “I’m alive?”

“What?! How?! Ngh! Why isn’t this working!” One tried to fire off more of his draining magic at you, but it just wasn’t working. He then looked to himself as he realized he was falling apart at an alarming rate. “Oh no! I WAS tricked! This electricity! It’s of harmonic magic?! NO! NO! Was this your plan all along?!”

No, but let’s go with that. “You bet! Guess you didn’t know the details behind this beauty. Four and Starlight made it for me, since you were obviously too dumb to actually handle making anything. Did you forget who I was, bitch? I’m the goddamned Hero Colt!”

“Commander…” One turned to try to get some kind of help from Starlight, who she herself had found herself free thanks to his weakened form, and was now standing up to finally blast his ass herself. He didn’t notice, nor care, he just reached his paw out for her and cried for help. “Help me, Commander… I’m fading… Turn him to mush, and allow me to take his essence. Then I can make your dream come true… Pleeeasee…”

“Never. You were a good assistant, One, but you tried to hurt my friend, and for that, I’ll never forgive you!” Starlight sure was pissed, ready to deal the final blow with her magic.

“C-commannnddddeeeerrr!” One was weak, but still did his best to cry out to her. He reached for her as his body was becoming nothing but dust, his very form becoming translucent as he began to fade away.

Starlight wasted no time, the moment he got point blank, she fired a bolt of magic right at him, or rather, through him. Yes, it seems he was so far gone that her shot passed right through him and right into your face, sending you flying backwards, headfirst, into a wall. Starlight, upon realizing what she had done, gasped and sat as she put her hooves to her mouth in shock.

One merely chuckled, as he took that as the only good thing he was able to witness during his vanishing act. “Nice shot, Commander…” was his final words as he finally disappeared, the wire’s shocking effect coming to a halt due to the switch being clicked upon your fall back to the floor.

“Anon!” Starlight rushed over to you, kneeling down to make sure you were alright. “Are you hurt?! Do you need to go to the hospital?! Oh gosh! Anon! I’m so so sorry, I didn’t think that’d miss!”

You just groan, look to her, and give her a weak smile. “Nah, I’m used to being tossed, smacked, and blasted at this point. I’m good.” Ogh, not really. While your head was fine, you still felt the impact through your body. It ached, but you were sure you’d be ok.

“Anon…” Starlight gently ran her hoof through your mane as she gave a weak giggle “You’re not invincible y’know. I… I really am sorry, I really didn’t mean to hit you like that. Are you sure you’ll be ok?” She started to tear up, she really felt guilty over blasting you with her magic like that.

“C’mon, Starlight, don’t cry. I’ll be ok. You always get like this whenever I am the least bit hurt, I’m not a little kid y’know… Technically.” You say, in a silly way to reassure her.

“Right… Right… Ok then.” Starlight was taking long breaths now as she tried to get ahold of the situation “That almost happened. But why? You don’t think Four and Five are going to turn like that, right?”

“I doubt it, they seemed a lot more accepting of their fate than One did. But sheesh, I actually beat the guy… Heh…” As you laid there on the ground, you decided to give Starlight a cocky grin “Pretty genius way of beating him, right?” You felt it was a great opportunity to show her how capable you really were, even if you didn’t actually figure it’d be her unicorn magic, tied to harmony, which would cripple One.

“Yeah, I guess you, erm, really do know how to take care of yourself in a fight. Good job, Anon.” Starlight said cheerily, feeling you deserved such a compliment.

But just then, a booming voice enters the room in heroic fashion. “Fillies and gentlecolts, do not fear! For Captain Wuz is here!” Discord, the original for sure, pops into the room in a flash. He was donned in his green tunic and long platinum hair, bow drawn to shoot at whatever the fuck he was gonna shoot at “Point that pesky clone my way so I can… Oh wait…” Discord then immediately pops into his normal self as he begins to wonder what’s going on. After looking around the room, he finally comes to his conclusion “He’s already gone. So he was already defeated then? Bravo, Anon, good work.”

“Yeah, he was no match for my-wait.” He was here to slay One? Why would he be here to slay One? What the fuck did he mean by ‘so he was already defeated then?’. Did he…? GODDAMMIT! “DID YOU KNOW HE WAS GONNA DO THAT?!” You shouted, finding yourself standing up with renewed vigor.

“Of course I did, it should have been fairly obvious he was going to do such a thing. I was just waiting for him to actually do it so I could come in and save the day. And… Hmmm, you both seem rather upset about that.” Discord said, confused as to why you and Starlight suddenly looked pissed.

“HE COULD HAVE KILLED ME! HE WAS ABOUT TO KILL ME! AND YOU KNEW?! HOLY SHIT DISCORD, YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE!” You yelled at the top of your lungs, hopping upwards with the sheer force of your own anger.

“Ohhh, tch tch.” Discord waggled his talons at you authoritatively “Such language, especially in front of your friend.”

“No, he’s right, Discord, you’re an asshole” Starlight said, looking at him with near pure agitation and discontent. She agreed with you, one hundred percent.

“Ugh…” Discord said as his eyes narrowed, his body slumping ever so slowly “I see how it is. Well, if I can say something in my defense…” Discord points over to Starlight “This whole mess is actually her fault.”

“MY FAULT?! WHAT?!” Starlight stepped back in surprise, her anger rising at such an accusation “AND HOW THE FUCK IS IT MY FAULT!?”

“Ew… Now Anon has got her doing it.” Discord said to himself before suddenly lightening up with a shrug, his tone changing to that of a calm and accusatory form. “Because you’re the one who wanted him to be utterly subservient to you. How could you not realize he was going to do anything and everything in his power to serve you for as long as you live? I didn’t want to make him that way, but you were so insistent on it. If I hadn’t made him that way, I would have just wasted more time than I already was due to your whining. Really, she’s the culprit, not me.”

Starlight’s eye twitched due to confusion for a moment, but then she looked at him, dead in the eyes, and made her case. “You did NOT tell me it would have made him attack Anon. I didn’t even ask for him to be subservient! I said to make him loyal, to make him listen to me, and to make sure he does everything I… Oh wait…” Starlight calmed down for a moment when she realized her mistake. But then pointed at Discord again as she realized her first claim still applied. “Ok, so I did ask for that! But you still didn’t tell me he was going to go crazy! That’s your fault, Discord! You should have said something. No, you should have just gotten rid of him altogether! He attacked Anon, one of your best friends, and yet you don’t even seem to care! How could you be so heartless?!”

“Heartless?” Discord opened up his chest like a door, revealing a creepy looking beating heart. “Doesn’t look like it to me” He says with a grin as he closes it up, then points over to you “Look, like I said, I was going to save Anon before he actually did the deed. But Anon himself defeated him before I could show up. To be honest, I think that deserves praise! Beating even one one millionth of my power is quite a feat. So again, bravo!” Discord said, clapping towards you.

But you just groaned and rolled your eyes, you really didn’t care for his shenanigans. “Goddammit, Discord, I don’t want your praise. Just fucking admit you fucked up. That’s the second time today I nearly fucking died and you’re acting like you don’t even care. What if I did actually die, what then? Huh? Starlight is right, you didn’t tell her what was going to happen, so it's your fucking fault.”

Discord did shudder when you mentioned that you could have died, then did his best to reel himself back from the horrid thought. “It wouldn’t have happened, only a pessimist would think that it would. And… Wait, where are you going?” Discord asked, surprised that you were suddenly opening the door to leave the room.

“Had enough of your shit, going to go to a photo shoot with the Riches.” You really did. If he acted just the least bit caring, you may have let it slide. But this? You didn’t have time for this shit.

“A photo shoot? Without me? Well hold o-hmm? Discord looked back to see his tail being held by Starlight’s magic “Excuse me? What are you doing?”

“I’m getting your attention. Leave Anon be, you’ve done enough, and you’d only make it worse at this point if you go after him.” Starlight tells him, warning him even.

“Oh please.” Discord scoffs “Anon is practically my son, he loves me! Tell her, Anon.”

You sigh, and look back at him with a somber expression “I dunno… At this point, Mr. Rich is more my Dad than you are, at least he respects me and wouldn’t even let me come close to dying if he could help it.”

“There see? I told-wait…” Discord double taked, and looked back at you, confused “What?”

“You heard me, I’m not going to repeat myself. Just go deal with Scootaloo and stuff, Discord. Let me just go do my thing and… I dunno, whatever… Starlight, you take care, ok?” You say, looking back at her to give her a weak smile.

“Anon, are you going to… HE-” Was all Starlight could say before Discord snapped her away.

The hell?! “What the fuck?! The hell was that for, Discord?! What did you do with her?!”

“I put her back in that fake magician’s wagon. Although, I could have done a lot worse. You, Anon, how could you say such a thing to me? After all I’ve done for you, why?” Discord was angry alright. He was hurt, sure, but it only served to piss him off it seemed.

“Oh fuck off with that!” You yell back at him as you stomp up towards him “You may have given me a bunch of cool things, Discord, but that doesn’t fucking mean you could put my life at risk whenever you damn well please! Goddammit! He was this close, Discord, this close! And he was created by you! Worst of all, you fucking KNEW! So get off your high horse and leave me the fuck alone! You’re a shitty dad, friend, and chaos buddy! In fact!” You throw off your saddle bag and your horn towards him, only keeping the Starlight Hook as it had nothing to do with him. “Take your shit back, and take my fucking room, I’m gonna go live with Fluttershy!” You’ve taken so much from Discord. His abuse, his dishonesty, him just being mean or an asshole to you, and this? He knew, and he let it happen just so he could play hero. Fuck him!

Discord began to literally crack along his body, shivering as he looked down at the toss items. He looked emotionally and physically devastated by your words and actions. “Anon… Y-you don’t mean that, do you? How could you say that? Chrysalis tried to end you directly, didn’t she? So why her over me? I was just doing what I always do, I really wasn’t going to let you get hurt by my own paw… You know that, right?”

“I don’t fucking care. She was racked with grief, and you were just being an asshole. I’m done with it all, Discord, you can just go and-NGH?!” You were caught offguard when Discord dived to your forelegs and started crying, holding on to them as he begged and pleaded

“W-wait! I’m sorry! Don’t go hating me just because of this! Don’t end our friendship and partnership over such a foul up! I really am sorry! I congratulated you too, didn’t I? I really meant that! And… ngh, I can’t take the thought of losing you. Even worse… Fluttershy would find out… I’d be alone… Don’t leave me alone, Anon… I don’t wish to be alone… I don’t even think Spike and Big Mac would want to be friends with me if they found out… So please...” He cried, sounding so fucking pathetic to the point that you had to roll your eyes. Christ…

“Ugh, sheesh, ok ok… God.“ You pull yourself back from him. You’d still think he was bullshitting if it wasn’t for the fact he wouldn’t fuck around or joke when it came to Fluttershy. Ugh, he could be such a pain in the ass, but you couldn’t destroy him over this either, you didn’t like the thought of him being abandoned just because he was an ass. But you also weren’t going to bend either, and wanted to lay down the law right here. “Fine, I forgive you, I’ll take my stuff back, and I won’t move in with Fluttershy. But you can’t put my life at risk over a joke ever again, or else we’re done, Discord, you got it?”

“Y-yes, I swear, scout’s honor.” Discord said as he slowly stood up, doing a scout symbol with the digits of his talons, donning a boy scout outfit as he did so.

“You better. Now the next thing. I’m going to be gone for a few days, and I don’t want to hear shit about it, alright? You got that?” You tell him, staring at him hard as you do so, because you knew there was something he wanted that you simply didn’t want to do.

“W-what? What about our O&O session for tonight?” Discord said. Still visibly shaken, but easily slipping back to his selfish attitude.

You just roll your eyes at him “You know I don’t like that game. Besides, Big Mac isn’t even in town right now, it wouldn’t be very fun with just me, you, and Spike. Even then, I need some time to cool down from this. Stop being selfish, Discord, don’t make me hate you.”

“Yes… Right, well… Ahrm. I just thought maybe you’d have more fun with us than whatever you’d be doing. Besides, maybe your future wife would like to play with us as well? Surely you’d have more fun if you had her by your side, correct?” Discord said, giving you pleading eyes. Perhaps he just didn’t want you to go, perhaps he just wanted you close by so he could be sure you wouldn't leave to stew in whatever hatred you had for him, but acting this way certainly wasn’t helping things. “Besides… I’d like a little help with dealing with the last two clones. I feel emotions may run high there, and I’m not equipped at the moment to deal with it.”

“I can help you with Scootaloo, I’m ok with that. But my trip is kind of like a date with Diamond, and I’m hoping the resort we’re going to will be fun enough. Either way, you’re reaching Discord. Hell, what makes you think she’d want to play anyway? You know girls aren’t into that kind of thing.” Come on, Discord, just lay off.

“Maybe, but how can you be so sure? Have you asked her? Also, you only dislike the game because of your bad luck. If you keep at it, you’d find that it’s much more fun than you think. Yes, it's a fantasy world within the fantasy world you wanted, but it’s a lot more exciting, don’t you think?” Discord really was pushing it, as if he hadn’t learned anything at all.

You were about to pop off at him, once again getting sick of his shit. But then something hit you, something that could and would play out to your favor. Discord only really had one actual language to him, and if he didn’t understand personal space to well, then he’d understand something he couldn’t refuse. Something you’d just take full advantage of for your own benefit. “You’re that sure, huh? Then how about we make a bet…”

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