Chapter 168 - Apple
Goddammit, of course Discord would do this, of course Discord would blow you the fuck up for shits and giggles or his crappy little revenge scheme. Whatever, you may be up in the sky, but you still have a way out without having to waste your last charge. “Hehe, you think you got me this time, Discord? I got my saddle bag, motherfucker, and you know what that means.” You snicker as your ascent began to turn into a descent.
You reach into your saddlebag and begin to rummage around. “School stuff, bits, school stuff, Starlight hook, bits, bits, more bits… Ah, here we go!” You yell out as you hold up your cardboard wings in triumph. “I am one smart guy. Alright, been awhile since I used these things but all I gotta do is plop it on my back and there we go!” You place the wings on your back as they change into bonafide pegasus wings. Unfortunately, not only were you on a hard fall at this point, but you also forgot using the wings required actual flight skills, skills you had since forgotten. “SHIT! IT HAS BEEN AWHILE SINCE I USED THESE THINGS! GYAAAAH!” You weren’t able to catch yourself as you spiraled towards the ground. And with a splash, you end up in the fountain near town square. Nearly choking, you swim back up and hang over the edge as you spit up water. “G-guh, d-dammit, I should have just used the damn horn.”
“Woah, Anon, that was an awesome entrance. You even left a sweet smoke trail up in the sky!” Came the familiar voice of a sea green pony.
Wut? Smoke trail? You look up in the sky to see that there was indeed a trail, you then lift your ass a bit to see behind yourself, noticing that your tail was frazzled and charred. You sink your ass back in the water to wash it off, then groan. “I’m gonna kill him, I… Wait.” You look ahead to see Gallus, Yona, and Sandbar. Oh shit! You landed right where you needed to be! “O-oh, hey fellas… Er, you thought my entrance was awesome?”
Yona nods. “Yes! Yona almost thought you were falling, but Yona can see you have pegasus wings, so you must have dived down to make big splashy entrance.”
Gallus shrugs. “Gotta say, it was pretty cool. Gonna take a guess that those wings are just another trick you got, right?”
“Er, y-yeah. Heh, you guys better get used to this, I have a thing for flashy entrances and exits.” Just play it cool, Anon. They have no fucking idea Discord had just blown you up.
“Hey, as long as you’re not breaking your bones, that’s fine with me. I mean, as long as it doesn’t get obnoxious or creepy or anything either.” Gallus says, shivering a bit from the thought of you removing your skin again. "Just saying, being annoyed stinks."
“Relax, I always make sure it’s something cool. But, er, enough about me. Cozy said she had something for us to do together, right?” You asked, noticing four carts with containers behind the group. “Got anything to do with those carts?”
“Oh, yeah actually. Cozy totally came up with this awesome idea to give out free apple pie slices to the ponies of ponyville. She made enough that each container has fifteen slices for each of us to give out, really big pieces too, almost half a pie each. Not only is it gonna be a really nice thing to do for everycreature, but it’s really awesome Cozy would even take the time to make all these pies. We’re gonna make a lot of townsponies really happy.” Sandbar said with excitement as he stepped back to attach a cart to himself.
“Man, you’re saying the word free and I barely feel a thing. I guess friendship classes are really working out after all. I’m down with this and all but…” Gallus seemed to become a bit skittish as he too attached a cart to himself. “Let’s just not go and say we got all these pies to everycreature, huh? I’d rather not deal with a crowd. It’s, uh, just annoying.”
“Don’t worry, Gallus, I know what you’re saying. We’d probably upset a lot of ponies if we just let everypony know we had pies to give. Y’know, since we don’t have enough for everycreature. So let’s just stick to the plan and hand them out while making it look like we’re selling them, it’ll be easy.” Sandbar said, doing his best to reassure Gallus.
Apple pies? Fifteen each? Sixty slices is a lot if the sizes are to be believed. “Cozy just made a lot of apple pies just like that? Where did she get the apples? I have been in her room and I never saw any.”
“Yona remembers Cozy saying that she had been keeping them near the Everfree Forest to keep them fresh. But Yona doesn’t know where she got them, doesn’t ponies sell apples?” Yona asked, being sure that apples were commonly sold in Ponyville.
“I guess. But…” Why did you suddenly get a dreadful feeling? “Did she get all the apples specifically for this?” You ask again, feeling more inquisitive by the moment.
Sandbar shrugged. “I don’t think so. I asked her too and all she said is she had too many apples that she couldn’t do anything with anymore. But hey! Better they get some use than go to waste, right?” Sandbar said with unbounded enthusiasm.
Too many apples? How did she end up with too many? Nooo, no, no. You could already see where you were going with this. You remember the rotten apples and baskets back where you found the Storm Ravager’s arm. But that had nothing to do with her, right? If anything, it would make more sense that the bastard may have been taking her hoard of apples. But then, wouldn’t he have been noticed by someone? Maybe at least Zecora. Mnnn, you doubted Cozy had anything to do with it, but you weren’t going to be the idiot who doesn't ask questions. You’ll just have to play it cool, and just hint at it. If she acts ignorant and unsuspicious, then it’ll be fine. Heh, you’re a genius, Anon. The mane six, even if they made the connection, would have dismissed it. Then again, that worries you, as it implies in your mind that Cozy has something to do with the Storm Ravager. But nope, she probably doesn’t, you just need to deduce it when you can. “Ah, er, I see. Shall we get started then?”
“Yeah!” Yona said with a high hop, her coming down shaking everyone as you are literally sent a few feet up, only to land back down on your head.
“Anon! Yo, are you ok?!” Sandbar asked, already attempting to tend to you.
“Oh no! Yona sorry, Yona forget that happens when she gets excited.” Yona said, blushing and embarrassed about her earth shaking excitement.
“No, it’s fine. This doesn’t even phase me anymore.” and it probably never will again. “Let’s just do this.”
And so, the four of you went off onto the roads of Ponyville, looking for ponies who might need a pick-me-up with some delicious pie. But Cozy Glow, and apple pies? It’s a coincidence for sure. You knew nothing will really come of it when you ask her, simply because making back and forth trips that deep into the forest would be suicide for a filly like her. It's too unlikely. Then again, while the trope is the more suspicious you act, the less likely you are to do it; That trope was turned completely on its head when Twilight accused Chrysalis when she was pretending to be Cadance. But nah, that's not a thing, she's a child, and not a demon either. It had to be fine.
“So, are we really doing this meet up thing at that old castle in the forest? Isn’t it, I dunno, falling apart or something?” Gallus asked as he looked to Sandbar
“Yup, but don’t worry, it’s totally safe! Cozy and Smolder said the place seems pretty sturdy, and it’s really empty too! A perfect place for a party. We just shouldn’t go and explore it too much though, since it apparently has a lot of weird secret walls and stuff.” Sandbar replied.
Wut? “Cozy and Smolder went to the old castle? As in, inside the Everfree? Why?” Oh god, you were gonna sound like a pussy but… “That’s pretty dangerous if you ask me. Last time I went there, there was a chimera.”
“Well, there isn’t one now. And didn’t you say Applebloom goes into the forest all the time to meet a zebra named Zecora? Doesn’t seem that bad to me.” Sandbar said with a shrug.
“Even if it was bad, Yona not let any forest monster hurt her friends anyway. Besides, where else would all of us meet?” Yona asks.
“The school?” Like, that seemed simple enough.
“Yeah, no. I like the school and all, but none of the dorms there fit all of us. And even if it did, it’s a tight fit. I’m fine with the castle. Besides, nocreature is going to bother us out there.” Gallus said, just looking ahead with that same stoic and seemingly uninterested expression he usually gives. Odd, he doesn’t seem to like being in crowded spots. You'd question it, but, you wanted to question something else. As things with Cozy was seeming more and more off.
“I guess, but who even suggested the castle?” You ask.
“Cozy Glow. Yona think we should be thankful Cozy is making all the plans for us, she good pony.” Yona says with a happy nod.
Ok… Wait, before you start deducing. “And Smolder checked out the castle with her? Why Smolder?” For protection, it has to be.
“Protection. She’s scared of going into the forest alone, and Smolder liked the idea of exploring an old castle. So it worked out.” Sandbar said as he began to look around. “Guys, maybe we should stop here and start offering pies. They aren’t going to stay warm forever.”
Ha! As you thought! Cozy can’t handle the forest, so she couldn’t have been going in to meet with the Storm Ravager. Whew, and here you thought things were about to get ugly. And as you thought this, you began to hear the codec ring in your ear. “Ah! Oh, yeah let’s stop here, I’m getting a call right now.”
“A call?” Gallus looked around, then put his talons next to his ear to listen for something. “I don’t hear anything.”
“Oh, haha! Right. I got this thing in my ear I call a ‘codec’. Let's me talk to my dad from anywhere in Equestria. Erm, it’s usually for important stuff. So, er, can you guys give me a second?” You ask as you begin to step away, before Yona stopped you with her body, just standing behind you. She was curious to find this 'codec', and ‘gently’ grabbed onto your ear with her hooves and brought her own ear close.
“That weird, Yona doesn’t hear anything.” She said as she tugged a ‘little’ harder, causing you yelp as you pulled away, your entire body trembling in a quick and sudden shot of pain as your ear felt stretched like a rubber band.
“Y-Yikes! Yow! Woah, Yona, geez! Personal space, please! Look, I promise you, I got one of these. It’s just in a way only I can hear it.” Oof, your head may be invincible, but it freaking felt like she was going to rip your ear off! “G-geez, my ear is tender now.”
“Oh no, Yona sorry! Yona assumed since head was strong, ears were strong too!” Yona got worried, she had never outright hurt anyone before. She grabs onto you, and you nearly screamed for dear life until you realized she somehow wasn’t snapping your back in two.
“Y-yona? A-are you ok? Wow… You hug pretty soft.” God… ‘You hug pretty soft’. What the hell is that? You sound like a damn nerd saying that. But it was the truth, her hug was pretty comforting.
“Yona yak, and yak strongest there is, so yak have to learn to hug soft for hugs with not yaks. Is Anon ok, really?” Yona said as she held you up, looking at you with big watery eyes.
“Uh, yeah, it’s fine. No worries, Yona. It’s ok.” You tell her, giving her a reassuring smile.
“YAY! YONA HAPPY THAT ANON FORGIVES YONA!” Yona said as she nearly snapped you like a twig. Gyah! So much for holding back!
“N-nghhh!” Was all you could get out as she smothered and nearly crushed you before putting you down. She looked at you, confused, and asked if you were ok again. You merely waved your hoof, said in a crushed tone that you were fine, and clumsily walked off to take the call.
“O-ogh, geez, I don’t think my back is going to recover from that one. Why is Discord even calling? Did something big happen already?” You slip into an alleyway and answer your codec, only to have your eardrum nearly obliterated by the shrieks of three mares.
“Gyah! What in the?! Argh! Ngh!” You couldn’t even rip the codec out, holy shit, it was like a damned banshee. “Discord! What in the fuck is that!” Like damn, what’s with the sudden ear abuse?
“Oh, don’t blame me, Anon. That was merely the shriek of Twilight and her friends. You know, when that Tommy fellow let loose on that poor waiter. Really, it got me too, terribly violent. Well below the spectrum of anything I’d do. Anyway, I thought you might want to hear some of their commentary. Let me just adjust things and…” And suddenly, you can hear the voices of Rarity, Starlight, and Twilight.
“Twilight, this is getting absurd! I cannot believe anypony would or even could derive enjoyment from this… Filth. Not the film itself, mind you, as I find this in depth look into the seedy underbelly of human organized crime to be interesting, if vulgar. Are we supposed to identify with this Tommy person? I certainly hope not, which is why I’m glad we had poor Spike leave the room before… This!” Welp, that was Rarity. And indeed, it seemed she really was intrigued, and yet disgusted, by the movie. She just must really hate Tommy.
There was no response from Twilight.
“Twilight, are you ok? Y-you’re giving us a pretty creepy look.” Starlight said with a gulp.
“M-me? Oh, I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be? I’ve only witnessed the sullying of family values, the bribing of those who are supposed to protect the people, a corrupt social system, and pointless loss of life. Why wouldn’t I be ok? It’s just a documentary, juuuust a documentary! It’s nearly over, right?” Twilight said, her voice shaking, filled with a false positivity that even you could detect without seeing what her expression must be.
“Darling, I think we’re still in the beginning and… Oh dear, Twilight, are you alright?!” Rarity said in sudden shock.
“Nope, she’s out. Yikes, this is going to be a rough next few hours. Scrappy, this is only going to get worse, right?” Starlight asks, rather calmly.
“Yes and no, lots of crazy and not crazy and confusing stuff happens.” Scrappy suddenly lets out a whimper “And near the end, something happens that made the queen very sad.”
“Very sad? Chrysalis, sad? Whatever could that be? It seems to me that she rather… Ooooooh, would I be correct in saying that justice eventually does get served?” Rarity asked.
“Yes… I guess. But you should really watch it to the end to see what happens. It’s really neat!” Scrappy said with excitement before whimpering again “And sad.”
“Well, I’m just going to put it on pause until we can wake Twilight up. I’m also going to get some of the pillows from my office, I have a feeling we’re gonna need them.” Starlight said, probably implying that she needed them to place under Twilight.
“Anon, this is simply too good, I can’t believe you aren’t here to witness this yourself! What were you doing again?” Discord asked.
“Just some friend stuff I gotta deal with, it’ll be fine. I did want to see Twilight faint though. Christ, things haven’t even started and she’s already down for the count. Wonder how she’ll handle Henry being an adulterer after he has kids… Wonder how she’ll handle the fact his kids are exposed to this at all.” You say as you wondered about it. Oh yeah, Twilight might actually die from the movie before Chrysalis ever gets her chance at her.
“Oh, whatever it might be, this more than makes up for embarrassing me in front of her brother. It really does feel lonely, however, watching this by myself. Are you sure you can’t join in on all this fun?” Discord asked. Damn, you didn’t expect him to suddenly ask for your company like that. Shit, you kinda wish you could sit and watch everything with him, but…
“Sorry, Discord, I really am. But hey, keep me posted, ok? I at least want to listen in on the juicy moments.” Like, after that? It was worth your ears nearly exploding.
Discord let out a sigh of disappointment. “I will, I guess, not as fun as seeing it though. Well, whatever, you enjoy your silly friend thing and I’ll give you a call when anything hilarious happens.”
“Thanks, Discord. And don’t sound so down, ok? I’m sure we can do something like this together soon.” You say, in an upbeat manner to try to get him to cheer up.
“I certainly hope so. And whatever that might be, eh, I hope it'll at least half as good as this.” Discord said as he closed the call. Poor guy, you really didn't expect him to put down by you not being there.
Damn, now you kind of regret coming when you could be enjoying Twilight being a total spaz. You and Discord could have really made an afternoon of it. Ugh, stuck giving out apple pies, how fucking boring.
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Not gonna lie, I am immediately concerned about Smolder's current position at the castle if the Storm Ravager is at all involved.
Also glad Anon's suspicion radar is still kinda on, even if it IS a bit faulty, like if he suspects Cozy of being influenced by the Ravager guy, why would Smolder being separated alone from them give him ANY peace of mind.
I'd immediately suspect hostage situation, going by how the Storm Ravager operates, course I guess Anon is under the assumption he'd just take Cozy Glow as a hostage if he needed one, which he could STILL do to maintain the facade of her being on their side even after his "return". Also the fact he thinks the Storm Ravager is dead still.
I'm also looking forward to Anon's response to Storm Ravager doing his whole "Villain despair" speech again, I don't expect Anon to despair, but say something along the lines of, "What I did to you before won't even compare to what I'll do this time if and when you fail, forget about trauma and vengeance, your mind won't even know your own name when I'm done." That is, IF he does come back and/or do the speech.... Which is honestly 99% likely in my opinion.
That last comma seems unnecessary.
10343639
I dunno, I was always taught that a list of three things needs two commas.
10347484
Cherrypop is actually right on this one....i'm 99% sure anyway
10347627
I thought that, when listing multiple things, you were supposed to leave the comma out at the last thing you list (It is replaced by the word ‘and’ instead).
10347954
looked it up and got this result
There's no single rule that applies to all situations. You usually put a comma before and when it's connecting two independent clauses. It's almost always optional to put a comma before and in a list.
Seems to be either or
10347971
I see.
10348318
Does this mean i get your 100% approval this time?
10348669
Yes.
ANNNNNND just like that, I'm finally caught up. It took me ages. But I'm here. Enjoying the chaos and whatnot. Excited for what comes next, (real tension build with chrysalis)
10354940
Once i come out of my mini hiatus, i have big big plans
10355815
I bet you do. I can't wait for them. (I can, take your time)
Hmmm. This story is so good that I might need to make a human in Equestria or Anonpony story when I am done with this to cope with the idea that it’s over and I’ll either never get more or have to wait for more.
I didn’t like the end of this chapter. I hope Discord recorded everything, and puts a movie of it like last time.