Chapter 139 - Anon, A True Hero Colt
And so there you all were, face to face with Cranky, and he didn’t look all too pleased to see the group. He didn’t even have a wig on at the moment. “Great, even more of you, did you come to harass me over some school project or whatever it was? No good trespassers just rushed in talking about getting to some needle or something and just decided to harass me and trample my garden. I even lost my hair over it. So, what? What do you want from me?”
Ah geez, seems in all the hubbub to get the needle, the rest of the students decided to just charge through Cranky to get him marked off their lists. You actually felt bad for the guy, that wasn’t right. Dammit Applejack, did she think this was a good idea? Maybe she thought her students would have been more friendly about it. Although it probably wasn’t the whole class either, just a few groups. Either way, no matter how many charged through here, it was still fucked up. “Actually, erm, Mr. Cranky, sir. We were just doing a scavenger hunt and finding a donkey was on the list. We don’t mean any harm and uh…” You move your head to the side to get a good look at how bad his flower bed by his house was trampled… It was pretty trampled. Could you fix that? You could, using your horn to help someone has nothing to do with the class at hand, so you couldn't be accused of cheating. Could be risky using chaos magic for something like this though. But damn, you felt for the guy. “I-I could fix your flower bed, if you let me.”
“Hm? Wait a second, I know who you are. You’re that colt who just appeared on my flowers that one day. Anon, right? Are you trying to trick me? How could you fix my flowers after those hooligans trampled all over it.” Cranky said, living up to his namesake as he walked back to his flower bed, lifting a single flower gently with a hoof before it slumped over and fell. “There’s no fixing this. And after I finally got it perfect for Matilda. Just my luck…”
Smolder inched closer to you and whispered “Anon, are you serious? Can your magic fix that? I mean, I know it can do ‘anything’. But can it do anything? I kinda feel bad for the guy, y’know? Almost feels like something dragons would do for kicks, it isn’t right.” Despite everything she had seen of you so far, it seems she still doubted your power.
You nod and whisper back to her. “Yeah, just watch this.” You approach the donkey in mourning, who was still trying to get the flowers to stand straight. “Mr.Cranky, I am serious, I can fix this if you let me. Look, I’m sorry, I really am sorry about what happened before. But this? C’mon, this type of thing is my bread and butter. I’m the hero colt for a reason, and I’m willing to get to it if you let me.”
“Hmph, do whatever you want, it won’t make a lick of difference. Heck, if you could fix this, I’d give you my best wig. That’s how much I know this can’t be fixed.” Cranky said, being as stubborn as a mule as he turned to look at his wagon. “As for me, I’m going to be get more fertilizer, get some new seeds, start over.”
Well, since he didn’t seem to care anymore, you slap on your horn and focus deeply on what you wanted. Revive the flowers, but not in a normal fashion. Well, reviving flowers is unnatural that within itself. Wait, but then they could be raised as the undead, and you don’t need zombie flowers running around. C’mon, Anon, think! If you were going to revive flowers, then all you have to do to make it chaotic is… “Got it!” You throw a spell onto the ground that travels through the ground towards the trampled flowers. In your head, you imagined the flowers sinking back into the ground and then ‘regrowing’ into even more flowers to create a more complete flower bed. Amazingly enough, it works, with the flowers exploding out of the ground, with mini-firework like explosions appearing above the flower bed. The regrown flowers were even more vibrant than ever before! “Yes! I did it!”
“Wooooooah, that’s so awesome! He really did it!” Sandbar said in amazement, enamored by the power of your magic.
“Did what now? What did he… Hm?” Cranky, who was about to attach the wagon on his back and head to town, noticed his flower bed had revived, filled with colorful beauty, ever more than before. “My flowers… That’s… You really did it. How?”
Yes! The Hero Colt saves the day again! “Oh, it was nothing. Just cast my magic spell and blammo! No need to thank me, I don’t even need a wig. Just think of this as me paying you back, y’know, about me trampling your flowers from way back.”
“I think you did more than you needed to. Matilda is going to love this when she gets back. I actually feel a spring in my step right now, and I don’t get one of those too often.” Cranky seemed pretty ecstatic for a moment, before he suddenly calmed down, soured up, and gave you a coarse look. “But I’m still angry about all those trespassers, and you all better be the last to bother me. Still…” Cranky gave you a little smile, and chuckled a small chuckle “If you do want a wig, I don’t mind. I do like to keep my word, after all. But, er, you’re not getting my best one. I still need it.”
“No no, it’s fine, really. I’m just glad to help out. And like I said, I owed you one.” Wow, you didn’t think he’d be this grateful. Then again, given he was talking about making his wife happy, it kind of makes sense.
“Well, then thank you then. I guess I should extend you an invitation for tea or something. I’m sure Matilda would be happy to have you as a guest. But you better act like you’re acting now, and not like when you were trampling my flowers. I know who your father is, and I don’t need shenanigans going on around me, Matilda, or my home.” Cranky explains, in a way that sounded like an old man beating something into you, but in a good natured way.
“Oh, you don't have to do that, Mr. Cranky. I'm just happy to have helped. By the way. I’m also the nephew of the element of kindness. Sooooooo, y’know, I got that going for me.” You tell him with a wink of your eye.
“I guess I can see it. Welp, you all can leave my property now. I’m going to set up a bigger fence around my flowers, and I rather not have any distractions. Now git!” Cranky said forcefully as he pointed his hoof back towards town. “And thank you again.”
You nod to him with a smile, and you and the group head back towards the school. All of them were impressed, even Ocellus and Gallus. Oh yeeeah, Anon, real smooth shit. This is how it should be, you doing things right, making the general populace happy, and raking in those sweet sweet good boy points.
“Well, I’m convinced Anon can literally cheat reality. Is there really no limit to that horn? And I mean is there really anything it can’t do?” Gallus asked, amazed by the power of your magic.
“Not really. As long as you understand chaos, you can make anything happen. Though, if you don’t get how chaos works, well, let’s just say you better hope your spell doesn’t obliterate everything around you.” You say, looking back at Gallus with a purposeful creepy grin.
“...Gotcha… Ok then, so… Er.” Gallus stopped for a moment, took a breath, and held up everyone’s sheets for the hunt. “Annnway, I marked down everything for everycreature, except for the needle. So here you go.”
“Thank you, Gallus.” Ocellus says as she takes the sheet and hovers upwards as she looks over her sheet.
“Thanks! Man, the Professor is going to be so proud of us!” Sandbar said with a hoofpump, excited to see and receive Applejack’s praise.
Yessss, Applejack can do nothing else but praise you and your friends. God, and they love you so much too. It is just like how it was when you first arrived in Equestria, where everyone loved and adored you, even Cranky loves you now! Everything is finally working out again! Yeah! Anon is the best, Anon is the best, Anon is the best, ANON IS THE BEWRFEADWS.
“Woah! Anon! Watch your step! Are you alright?!” Sandbar called out to you as you fall into the small lake in front of the school yet again.
“...I’m fine… I’m… Can somecreature help me out?” You look over at them, defeated, as you hold out your hoof.
“I gotcha” Smolder said with a giggle as she grabs onto your hoof and pulls you back. “Twice in one day, Anon? Somehow, I don’t think you were ‘cooling’ off this time, or the last time.”
“Oh no!” Ocellus called out, worried that something with you was really wrong. “Is he going blind?! Or worse! Did he finally hit his head enough times that he thinks water is ground too?!”
WUT?! “How does that even make sense?! Gyah, I just… Er…” You couldn’t even think of a good excuse this time. And as you tried to think, Smolder gave a gentle knock on your head and then shrugged. “Hey?! What was that for!”
“Just checking. His head seems fine to me. I don’t think he was paying attention, Ocellus.” Smolder says with a chuckle.
“Oh… That makes sense.” Ocellus said, unsurprised, and relieved it wasn’t serious.
So much for love and respect. “Yeaaah, yeah, ok, fine. But I was only not paying attention because I was busy sharpening my mind. It takes a big brain to figure out these friendship lessons.”
“I bet! I would have never figured out the lesson on my own so easily. You’re a genius, Anon!” Sandbar cheered.
Heh, yes, you were, weren’t you? “I know.”
Ocellus raised her hoof to try to say something about that, but she held back, she didn’t want to say anything rude. She did live with you at one point, and she knew as smart as you are, that you had your stupid moments. “M-mhmm. Anon does have some of his best moments when he has his time to think, erm, mhmm.”
Ha, even Ocellus knew your greatness! Of course she did, she did live with you at one point. With embarrassment averted, you all head inside the school and go straight back to class. And as you do, you all begin to pick up on a sweet and tasty scent.
“Huh, what is that? Smells like something that’d come from Professor Pinkie.” Gallus remarked as he took a few sniffs.
“Yeah, it smells… Wait, smells like apples to me. I mean, it smells great, but apples? I think it’s coming from Professor Applejack’s room.” Smolder said as she pointed towards the door back to class.
Yeah, it did smell like apples, and some cinnamon, and most of all, it smelled fucking delicious. It had to be apple pie, and due to how heavy the scent was, there was more than one pie, and all of them just freshly made and ready to eat. “Oh man, I think the professor has some ‘good job’ pies ready for us. C’mon!” OHHH DAMN! Fresh fucking apple pies?! Now it was a really damned good idea to come back early!
The five of you rush back into class to see Applejack placing a pie on her desk, her desk already covered in enough pies to feed the class, if they took one slice each. Applejack wiped her brow, nodded, and smiled to herself. “There, all ready to go. They should be cooled enough about the time they all get back and…”
“Hey, Professor Applejack! We’re back!” You announce as you all step back into the room.
“You are? WAIT! Y'ALL ARE BACK ALREADY?!” Applejack said in surprise, nearly falling back onto the pies from the sudden appearance of your group.
“Well, actually, it’s just our group, Professor. But you’ll be happy to know that the reason we’re back early is because we finished the assignment.” Ocellus said, feeling confident, and even a little cheery, for a job well done.
“You, er, finished the assignment?” Applejack said in confusion. She seemed like she wasn’t expecting that in the slightest. In fact, her eyes glance over to you for a moment before looking back at Ocellus. “As in, ya found everything?”
“Actually, no.” Ocellus said as she shook her head. “We didn’t find the needle.”
“Not like we had to.” Gallus said with a shrug. “Gotta admit, Professor, that was a pretty good trick. But, eh, way too easy to figure out for the likes of us.”
“Ah, come on, Gallus, Anon figured out the last big part of it. But we all did learn how important honesty is. And once we learned that, we decided to come back here. Honesty is about being truthful with yourself and your friends, right, Professor?” Sandbar asked Applejack, feeling he was right on the nose.
“Don’t forget doing the right thing. Woah, sounds weird saying that out loud. But hey, that’s what makes the world a better place, right?” Smolder adds on, smirking towards Applejack as she puts her claws to her hip.
“Yeppers. And Professor, I bet you’re wondering how I figured it out. Well, it was easy. It was an honesty test, right? Well, given there was no way to find the needle in time, it only made sense that the test was to resist the urge of marking it down on the sheets and get those ‘A’s’, right?” You say as you give Applejack a cool and arrogant smile.
Applejack’s eyes went wide for a moment as she looked down at you, now she was really surprised. “T-that’s exactly right. But how? None of you checked off for the needle?”
You all told her no in your own way, and showed her all your sheets. She could see not a single one of you marked down the needle.
“See? And once that was figured out, as we said, we came right back here. And given we’re the only group here, I can already guess none of the others figured it out yet. So, let me ask, does that get us an extra grade or something? Y’know, for figuring it out?” God, just looking at Applejack, you could see she was not expecting you all to come back so soon, to have it figured out so fast. No wonder Cozy thought you should be a professor, you already had this place licked.
“Well, no, I ain’t really planning on giving out extra grades. It's just there here pies for everycreature that passes the test. Er, let me ask y’all, was Anon the only one to figure out the needle was in a small haystack near Zecora’s?” Applejack asked, as her suspicion of you began to grow.
“Well, actually, we didn’t know the location of the needle at all. Like it was already mentioned, Anon figured out there was no point in looking for the needle due to the nature of the test.” Ocellus states “Technically, we all had figured out the importance of honesty before he figured that last part out. Or at least Sandbar did, as he was keeping us together and trying to make sure we stay honest with each other. In fact, that is what led to Anon coming to his final conclusion, I think. It was through something Sandbar said that Anon realized the needle wasn’t important.”
“I said we had to be honest with ourselves. That’s when Anon figured it out. It blew my mind. I can only imagine what would have happened if we went to look for the needle instead. Who knows, maybe one of us would have been, y’know, tempted? I mean, not really, since we were there for each other. But like Gallus said, it was pretty tempting.” Sandbar said. Pleased with himself for sticking with it.
“Ah see. Well, I’m proud of all of ya then. You passed the test and then some. Didn’t expect anycreature to figure everything out so perfectly, but ah guess that is what ah get for doubtin’. Now, they need a bit of coolin’, but why don’t y’all take a pie and share it amongst yerselves? Although, Anon, ah would like to talk to you alone, is ya don’t mind.” Applejack said, her proud tone becoming a little ominous as she began to stare at you harder and harder.
That look, you knew that look. Did Applejack, the honest horse, seriously not trust you? Holy crap, that’s what it was, wasn’t it? But before you could say anything, Gallus just speaks up, hoping what Applejack had planned wasn’t something super special specifically tailored to you. “Woah, hold on, he’s not getting any extra grades, right?”
“No, Gallus, ah just want to talk to him, that’s all.” Applejack said, her stare never leaving you.
Well then, it was going to be like that, huh? You had nothing to hide this time, so you had the upper hand. Ha, let her try to accuse you. You did nothing wrong and she can’t prove shit. “Well, let’s talk then, Professor.” You say as you give her a falsely adorable look. “I wanna get a slice of that pie too.”
“Don’t worry, Anon, we’ll save you a slice. I’ll even reheat it for you if you take too long. It’s no big. And hey, if you’re getting an award or something, you gotta show it to us, ok?” Smolder said as she waved over to you, shooting off a tiny bit of flame to emphasize her ability to ‘heat things up’.
Oh, there would be an award alright. Not a physical award, mind you, but a personal one for just putting Applejack in her place. Like seriously, what was her problem? Was it really the O&O thing? Ah well, you had nothing to worry about this time, you had this. “Sure, Smolder, sure…”
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If somehow they got a way to tell if Anon uses his horn, well Anon can simply tell the truth of why he used it an get more gravy points. And...maybe get the kids who don't respect other's property some scolding over that. But beyond that it could be Queenie related so I'm pretty curious what she wants to talk to him about.
The cliff hanger be killin me
be?
Seems like one ‘then’ too many.
Annnyway?
I feel like AJ is just going to accuse Anon of cheating somehow.
Only one thing comes to mind for Applejack to stare at Anon like that, and I think its obvious enough that I don't need a spoiler, she's clearly going to ask him if he used his horn at all. He technically did, but it wasn't related to the test itself, so I'm curious how that conversation is going to go down. Applejack's response to her students destroying Cranky's flowers is going to be fun, though.... I don't think I need to spoiler this one either, to be honest....
HUMILITY!
I had to reread this paragraph multiple times cause I kept getting interrupted, and I realized this could be an innuendo, and this is a genius innuendo if so.