• Published 16th Jun 2018
  • 2,184 Views, 1,162 Comments

Dadonequus Discord (Book 2) - CrazedLaughter



With the exodus of Chrysalis, Anon's life finally starts to go back to normal. Or rather, as normal as it can be when being the adopted son of the spirit of chaos. But new problems await him. What they are? Who knows...

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Chapter 75 - Four and Scootaloo

Author's Note:

A special thanks to Mist_Chaser for reminding me of an important plot point

“A bet? How unusual of you, especially at a moment like this. So I take it you aren't mad at me anymore?” Discord asked, wanting to make sure he was in the clear.

“I’m still kind of mad, but I’ll get over it. Anyway, if you really want to make it up to me, then you’ll hear me out.” Surely he’ll take it, that should be enough bait.

“I’m listening” Discord said, crossing his arms as he awaited your terms.

“You want me to play O&O? Fine, I’ll do it… If you can somehow convince Diamond to play with us rather than going to a romantic date with yours truly. If you can, I’ll play without complaint.” Just wait for it, Anon, reel him in.

“Sounds somewhat doable. But I must ask, what happens if I lose?” Discord wonders.

“Easy, I get a whole day of unlimited charges. Sure the bet sounds a little stacked in my favor, but you do really want to have that game tonight, right?” Take it, Discord. Take it and lose. If he really was going to use you to enact his own fun, then you’d do the same to him.

“I do, and that bet is TOO stacked in your favor. So how about this? Just agree to come with little Diamond Tiara tonight and I’ll give you three days of unlimited charge. Deal?” Discord says as his expression forms a small grin. He reaches out his paw to you to await a hoofshake of sorts.

WUT?! WAS HE SERIOUS?! “Woah, woah, woah! Wait! Are you seriously saying you’re gonna give me three days of unlimited power for just one night of O&O? What happened to being responsible with so much power? What happened to limiting me so I don’t go off the hook? Seriously? Three days? Huh, I could do a lot with three days…” Really, you could. One day for fun, another to spy on Twilight’s school, and the last to get the drop on Chrysalis and… Hmm… Even visit Tempest, it’s been awhile since you’ve seen her, she might appreciate you dropping by. Still, why would Discord make it three? “Wait, so what’s the real catch to this?”

“That was the real catch. You should know why I’m offering so much to you for so little, Anon. I’m doing it to sate my own selfish nature while also offering you a peace offering for my egregious foul up. So, saying that, I’d like to believe that should you accept this deal, that we are square. So… Are we square, Anon?” Discord continues to hold his paw out, awaiting your hoof.

Fuck it, you can overlook this if it meant being an all powerful god for three days. You reach your hoof to his paw and give it a shake “We’re square, I can deal with one night.”

“Good…” Discord said with a relieved sigh “Good. Now, this whole clone business. Ugh, Yes, hrmm…” Discord eyed around the area, then looked to you for an answer he wanted to hear “Do I really, REALLY, need to be her friend? It’s so sudden, so contrived… It’s not like I’ve been the one having fun with her. Yes, a part of me has, but not me me. Anon, you used to be human, how exactly do I get out of this?”

Well, truthfully, he really didn’t need to. It was only Fluttershy who was pushing him to expand his friend pool. “You really don’t have to. I mean, you should be really nice over the fact you’re about to make her new friends disappear forever, but you don’t actually have to be her friend. Yeah, you’ll have those memories, but they shouldn’t influence who you are or what you want.”

“How profound, any reason why you’d actually tell me that so freely, and without guilt of going against Fluttershy’s want for me to make a friend?” Discord asked, curious as to why you’d actually tell him such a thing.

“I dunno, I just can’t see you handling too many friends at once, especially with the way you are.” You comment, knowing how Discord could be when he acts the asshole. “I don’t think she could handle you being rude or mean either. And I don’t think you could handle being put in your place after you do something wrong to her.” And for you, maybe you were still being protective of Scootaloo and perhaps even Discord in this way. They weren’t really compatible together, that you were sure of.

“Hmph, put in my place indeed.” Discord scoffed “While I do have bad moments, it’s nothing worth such a harsh evaluation. But very well, I will consider your advice. Still… It might not be that bad if she did become my friend…” Discord’s words trailed off there as he thought to himself. Balancing the pros and cons of having another friend, another pony to play O&O with, and perhaps someone even innocent enough to have fun with his totally not childish but still whimsical little tricks.

“What was that?” You asked, as he seemed to be talking to himself.

“Nothing, nothing, let’s just get this over with. Just try to follow along, Anon, as being ‘nice’ about it pertains to you as well. We all know that you can be quite insensitive yourself.” Discord said as he prepped himself up a little, cracking the bones on his arms as if getting himself ready physically as he was mentally.


“Nah, I’m not insensitive, I just miss the mark a couple of times, that’s all.” You say, feeling yourself right.

“Whatever you say, o high and mighty one.” Discord says while doing a polite yet condescending bow.


“Ergh… Whatever, let’s just do this thing already.” Those words, god you really hated those words.

You and Discord made your way to the janitor’s door. Upon opening it however, you both were greeted with some sort of dodgeball court. You could see Spike sitting on a chair, presumably as a judge, as Four and Scootaloo sat down in blue jerseys, cheering Babs on, as Sweetie and Apple Bloom sat at the other side of the room with green jerseys, cheering on Five. What was going on on the court itself was Babs and Five hurling dodgeballs at each other, the balls just appearing at their paws and hooves immediately, to be thrown at one another. Was this some sort of Blitz Dodgeball or something? It actually seemed kind of rad.

“Well, this should be easy, Scoots and Four are already alone. Let’s go say hi, and not make the clones disappear until after the game. Sound like a plan?” You tell Discord.

“I’m not a baby, Anon, I do know what manners are… Now go break the ice for me, will you?” Discord says as he detaches his paw to have it fling you forward to their bench, making you roll right onto it, albeit in a way that had you sitting on your belly, an uncomfortable position indeed.

“U-ughhhh…” You groan, feeling rather dizzy after that push.

“Anon?” Scootaloo notices you are suddenly at her side, and greets you while finding your sitting position odd. “Heya… Uh, why are you laying on the bench like that? Doesn’t that hurt your stomach?”

“...Yeah, ugh…” You slowly reposition yourself to sit on the bench on all fours, then take a deep breath to bring this whole thing to a close. “There we go. So yeah, hey! What’s up? What’s going on over there?”

“It’s cool, isn’t it? It was partly my idea actually! I wanted to play a quick game with everypony before Four and Five had to go. Everypony was cool with it, and Spike even suggested a quick game of dodgeball would probably work. But then I was like ‘Four and Five have powers, right? Let’s make it super cool by just having unlimited dodgeballs to throw at each other!’. And well, it turned into this. I didn’t know Five and Babs would go on this long though, they’re both really good at this!” Scootaloo said, at the edge of her seat at the excitement of Babs’s and Five’s movements. “They’re both really giving it their all. It’s exciting, right?”

“Yeah, it is. But uh, I’m actually here to tell you that Discord is here to come take Four and Five. But he’s willing to wait until the game is over before he does it. Um, I mean... “ Fuck, you really had no idea how to actually soften that blow. How do you sugarcoat the fact that new friends have to stop existing forever?

“Ngh…” Scootaloo turned her head back and saw that Discord was just standing by the door. He gave her an awkward smile and a wave, which just made her look forward in dread and despair. “It’s that time already? But c’mon, it’s not even the end of the day yet, can’t he wait just a little bit more?” End of the day? She sounded ready for after the game, but apparently not.

“I’m afraid that’s not how it works…” Four said suddenly, chiming into the conversation. Then again, he was right next to Scootaloo, how could he not hear you both? “As I have explained, we can’t exist forever”

“But why? Can’t Discord just pump you and Five with more magic? That’d keep you both going, right?” Scootaloo said as she looked back at Four, clearly upset that they were now at the precipice of their existence.

Four slowly shakes his head “He could, but it would not end well. We are merely his shadows, representative of his whims, mixed with some of the randomness chaos brings. Adding in more chaos magic would bend us to his current whim, with a roll of the dice causing us to change into something else entirely. Unless Discord was to give up his own life essence, it just wouldn’t work out, something Five and I and already accepted.” Four reaches over and begins to pet Scootaloo very gently on the head “If it does make you feel better, Five and I really have enjoyed our time existing.” He then looks over to Discord with a chuckle “Maybe it’ll help our dear originator have a little more appreciation for others.”

“Let’s not get sassy now. While I am allowing this goodbye, I’m still not sure if I am willing to be friends with her.” Discord replies.

“Whatever, I don’t want to be your friend either.” Scootaloo said as she got a teary eyed, knowing it really would be over soon. “Sure, you’ll have their memories, but you’re still a jerk. It’s like, sometimes you’re cool, but then you’d rather be a jerk than just be nice. I really don’t get it.”

“Hmm…” Discord stopped for a moment, and pondered on her words, seemingly curious about something. “Even now, everypony is still befuddled by such a revelation. I do what I do because that’s what I enjoy doing, but that doesn’t actually make me a jerk. But everypony just tends to think that anyway, even when I don’t do anything to them. Then again, simple children tend to think everything but themselves are wrong. Not my fault you decided to befriend a temporary being you KNEW wouldn’t exist forever.”

Scootaloo’s nostrils flared up for a moment in anger. She just looked up at Discord, frustrated with him, and just blurts. “Well, it was kind of hard when they turned out to be awesome. Maybe you should just stop existing by giving them your essence. Because everypony likes them better than they like you!”

“Oh dear…” Four said, looking troubled by Scootaloo’s words “Now now, let’s not go that far. He has his issues, but he truly isn’t that bad.”

Oh lordy, this was already turning hostile. “Scoots, hey, relax. That’s kind of messed up.”

“How is it messed up? Four and Five aren’t jerks, but he is! He doesn’t even care he’s going to just end them, just like that!” Scootaloo’s emotions ran high as she spoke, she really didn't like the idea of two beings she saw as wholesome just disappearing and returning to someone like Discord. “What he’s doing is messed up!”

Oof, she’s… Sorta not wrong. But he’s made so many clones before, and you were sure that Discord thought he was sure that something like this wasn’t going to happen. But asking for him to sacrifice himself like that was fucked up either way. “Scoots, look. Four and Five know they have to go, they are only magical constructs. Dad though, he’s an actual living being, with his own friends and life. You knew Four and Five weren’t going to be around for too long, but you got really attached anyway, and I can understand that. But think about it, if Dad ended himself, then what about those who care about him? Aunt Fluttershy, Spike, Big Mac, Me, Diamond… And uhh, well… Just think of how painful it’d be for us to have lost him after knowing him for so long. Heck, I wouldn’t be here without him. I know it isn’t fair, but you gotta accept it, that’s how it is.” Wow, that really just came out of you. Then again, you have had these moments before. It’s not like you don’t have SOME wisdom from your past life, along with your experiences in Equestria.

“He’s right, Young Scootaloo. I know it’s hard, but it simply must be accepted.” He gently hoists her up, and begins to give her a gentle hug. “What’s important here, is your memory of us. As short as our time was, it really is something to be valued. Some part of us will still exist within his memory as well, so we’ll never truly be gone, and we’ll remember you too. So no more tears, alright? Everything will be ok, I promise.”

Discord seemed rather stunned from both your words and Four’s, even more so by Scootaloo’s nuzzling and sobbing onto Four’s chest, it seemed to be getting to him. Perhaps, it was finally sinking into his head how delicate the situation actually was, because he looked like he was having a heel turn moment as he began to speak in a gentle tone. “Hmm… Well, that is true… I suppose. And given how important these memories seem, I wouldn’t just cast them aside. Yes, I may not be as perfect as you see them, but I am capable of being nice. As in, I could take in their memories and… Perhaps share my time with you in a fashion best representing them. I know it’s not a perfect replacement, but knowing now how deeply this is affecting you, and thinking about how my friends would react if the places would switch… Well, I suppose what I’m saying is that perhaps I wouldn’t mind sharing a friendship and being… Oh what’s a word to use to not make me seem too pathetic? Well, I’ll do my best not to make you upset. But I do expect it to be between us, having your friends as tagalongs would just cramp my chaotic mojo. Does that sound reasonable?” He really was affected by Scootaloo’s words and reactions. Even he understood how heavy things can be, he himself could have his soul crushed in an instant if someone he cared about that much just suddenly hated him.

“See? He really isn’t so bad. Here, give him a chance, and you’ll see that everything will be alright.” Four says as he gently places Scootaloo down, and gives her another gentle pat.

Scootaloo looks up at Discord, still teary eyed, but a little more willing to open her heart after hearing such words. She didn’t realize Discord could be so profound in the ways of caring and friendship. “I’m sorry, I… I didn’t mean to say anything mean like that, I was just, y’know. I mean, I still don’t know if I want to be friends, you’re still not 'them' even if they came from you. But I don’t wanna hate you either. Everypony is right, you are awesome too when you wanna be, and Anon is, like, my partner of hero stuff; so it’d be kind of dumb to just think you’re a really bad guy considering he’s here because of you. How about we just be nice and friendly to each other and see how it goes… And… Is there anyway for Four and Five to stay for just a little bit longer? Please?”

Discord sighed a heavy sigh, and turned his head towards the game. “I could just leave them to disappear naturally. Given they are still surrounding themselves in some chaos, such as this game you’re all playing, they should last a little longer. We’d both win, to be honest. You get your final moments, and I don’t have to be here to pick up the pieces, everypony wins. Besides, I have some important business with Anon anyway. Photo ops and deals to make, you know how it-Huh?!” Discord is stunned when Scootaloo suddenly jumps into him, giving him a warm hug.

“Thanks, Discord! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! Umm… Erm…” Scootaloo, realizing she was hugging someone she just condemned just a moment ago, backs off and looks away with a nervous smile. “Sorry… Erm, you’re cool, t-that’s all I wanted to say. I wouldn’t mind hanging out when I’m free. Just ask, ok?”

“I’ll… Keep that in mind, there is a game we all like to get together to play, so… Well, we’ll see.” Discord sniffs, an obvious sign he was feeling just a little overwhelmed by all this. “Anywaaaay, Anon, come along, we have to and get our faces in the newspaper.”

“Yeah, alright. Scoots, you gonna be ok?” You ask, wanting to make sure she’d be fine before you go.

“Yeah, I’ll be ok. I-I just got a little overemotional, that’s all. But hey, everything is gonna be fine, right? I mean, look at you, you’re alright. Heh, I really thought something was gonna go wrong with you today, but everything turned out to be ok. So, if you’re gonna be ok, then I know I definitely will. So don’t worry about me, ok?” Scootaloo says

“Right, heh, totally… I know it'll be ok” You tell her, really hoping things would be fine. Yeeeeeah, totally had an ok day so far. She essentially managed to call what was going to happen to you within three guesses, so you hoped she was going to be as alright as she thought she’d be. “Take care, Scoots. And you too, Four, and thanks for the hook.”

“It was a pleasure to work with Starlight to make it. Fare thee well, Anon, I hope your day proves to be a good one the whole way through.” Four says with a gentle grin, very uncharacteristic for his appearance, but heartwarming nonetheless.

With that, Discord hurried you along back out of the janitor’s closet. He was relieved to be out of there. Truly, he did actually begin to care about Scootaloo, but he still didn’t want to go all in about it. But he did seem genuinely content with his decision to let Four and Five exist until their eventual end just to make Scootaloo happy. You knew deep inside that he cared, he was just not willing to just fully embrace it.

“Well, not the best way it could have been handled, but it worked out pretty good.” Really, it wasn’t all that bad.

“Speak for yourself, I actually started to feel BAD about everything. I don’t need that kind of disaster on my already volatile conscious. As long as she’s content, I’ll be able to look away with this with nary any guilt. In anycase, we have a photo op to get to, don’t we?” Discord dons a suit similar to Filthy’s, and adjusts it like some rich country man “If it’s one thing I really love, is looking better than anypony else.”

“Yeah. Ugh, then after that, I gotta convince Diamond to show up tonight… And then go deal with Twilight. Argh, this whole thing is going to be difficult. I know Celestia might be an issue, but she did give me her blessing to reform Chrysalis. The only problem is the fact that Chrysalis is still holding on to that banner of evil. Even with her blessing, I’m sure Celestia is gonna be hesitant as hell to actually allow it. Y’know how it is… Saying something is a lot different from actually doing something… Or allowing it, in this case.”

“Heh, not like you have to mention the whole ‘ending you’ thing, you should keep that to yourself. As for Twilight, didn’t she also make some sort of deal or promise about that? I remember you mentioning it before after that whole ‘Pony of Shadows’ incident. Something about a promise she made to you back when ole Chryssy was around, or when she left.. Something like that” Discord’s grin started to become a little evil as he spoke “You could use that as ammo, Anon.” Discord cocks back a talon, and fires a purple bullet right into a target with Twilight’s face, of course, making it appear out of nowhere “She is the Princess of Friendship. It’d be unseemly to just break a promise, don’t you think?”

Your ears perked up when he said that. Holy hell, you forgot about that! Of course you would, it was quite some time ago when she said such a thing. A mischievous little grin started to form on your face when you realized Twilight had no choice but to listen, or so you thought anyway. “Damn, Discord, and here I thought you were a total asshole the whole way through. Fuck, my plan might actually work after all! Thanks for reminding me.”

“Ahh, you always doubt me, forgetting that I always come through when it counts. Now, since I was a help, I do expect you and your little love to show up at Twilight’s castle tonight.” Discord chuckles to himself at the thought “Can’t wait to, perhaps, check on our princess before the game… See if she’s alright”

“Fine with me, I’ll make sure it happens. Anyway…” You run your hoof through your mane, to make it cute and messy “Let’s do this”

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