• Published 16th Jun 2018
  • 2,241 Views, 1,203 Comments

Dadonequus Discord (Book 2) - CrazedLaughter

With the exodus of Chrysalis, Anon's life finally starts to go back to normal. Or rather, as normal as it can be when being the adopted son of the spirit of chaos. But new problems await him. What they are? Who knows...

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Chapter 106 - The Challenge of the Yak

And there you waited, on the side of the road, waiting ways away from the river as you awaited for the arrival of Smolder and her friends. Ugh, look at you, Anon, you actually gave up a clean victory for one minute of belly rubs. What was wrong with you? Diamond would have given you belly rubs for, like, a whole day if you asked. But nooooooooooooooooooooooo, you had to go and want to feel dragon scritchy scratches. Goddamn, you were such a fool.

Hmm? Suddenly you heard voices, you look forward and tilt your head, adjusting your ear ever so slightly. Ahead you could see Smolder, A blue griffon, and a very light purplish grey… Wait, is that the hippogriff? W-woah, she looked… Kinda adorable, and soft. Was that Silverstream? Yeah, she looked cuuuute! But what were they talking about? Hmmm…

Oh yeah, also there was the yak, huh, she was kinda adorable and soft looking for such a big animal. But goddamn that Silverstream. Mmm mmm

“I can’t believe it! I’m finally going to be able to meet the Hero Colt! MMMMMMMMMMM!” Silverstream was spiraling around in mid air in excitement. “I bet he’s even stronger and more powerful than the legends say!”

“Er, how is he a legend if he’s real? Silverstream, you do remember what’s actually going on here, right?” The blue griffon, who must have been this Gallus Smolder mentioned, said.

“Of course I do, I remember the bet.” Silverstream said rather cheerfully “If we see him, we all cheer! Just like I dreamed of”

“That’s not how… Ugh, oook then.” Gallus said with a heavy sigh. “Welp, the bet is a bust. I should have seen that coming. But Silverstream does bring up a good point, ‘if we see him’. You sure he’s around here, Smolder? Already kind of a risk abandoning our assignment. I really don't feel like having some sort of sit down or whatever.”

“He should be around here somewhere. And uh, don’t worry about the bet, it was kind of pointless anyway.” Smolder said, seeming rather confident, yet showing subtle hints of worry.

“Yeah, I guess. Truthfully? And I don’t want anycreature to laugh, but I was kind of enjoying saying hi to everycreature in town.” Gallus said, seeming a little defensive about it.

“Ooooohhh! Me too! Ponies are super duper nice, aren’t they? I already feel like a pony myself! Which I sorta am when I’m a seapony!” Silverstream said, feeling cheerful about the whole thing.

“Yeah, they sort of are. It’s a little weird too, even the foals here just kind of looked at me, smiled, and said I was strong and cool and stuff. It’s uh… Really different, especially when you compare it to Griffonstone.” Gallus explained, seeming even more subdued as he said it.

“Yona noticed, and Yona thinks ponies are all very nice. But Yona still have to face Anon, yak honor depend on it!” The yak, Yona, said, stomping her front hooves down. Woah, her stomp was so strong that even you felt it, it even knocked you out of balance. Christ, the fuck was up with that?!

“Wait, face Anon? As in fight?!” Silverstream suddenly hovered in front of Yona and waved her arms to stop her friends. “Yona, you can’t fight Anon, you’ll get really hurt! I know we haven’t known each other long, but you’re already one of my greatest friends! I can’t let you do this!”

“Relax, Yona not actually fight Anon to destruction. Yona only want to prove that any yak can head smash better than any pony.” Yona said as she sidestepped Silverstream. “No big deal, Yona make it quick.”

“Yeah, I hope it’s quick, we really gotta get back to town as fast as possible after this. Eheh, though, we could just call it a tie now and not worry about it, since the bet is off and all.” Smolder said, also trying to defuse the situation.

“Like Yona said, Yona will make it… Wait, who that down the road?” Yona said as she made an immediate stop, looking forward to see you.

“A colt? Huh, what is he doing way out here? Kind of dangerous to be alone out of town, isn’t it?” Gallus asked.

“Maybe he lost his mother! Guys, we have to help him! It’s what any good friend would do! And that is what we’re learning to be! Good friends!” Silverstream said, already ready to do anything she can to uh… save the day.

“Actually, that’s him. That’s Anon.” Smolder said as she pointed over to you.

“Uhhhhhhh, what?” Gallus said, visibly confused by what he was seeing and what he was hearing.

“Yona confused, Yona thought hero colt was big and strong, but he small, very small.” Yona said, also obviously confused by the whole thing as well.

“Yep, totally not comfortable with this. Look, even if that is actually him, we’ll be chased out of Equestria if we let Yona turn him to paste.” Gallus said, already feeling a giant mistake has been made.

“Yak honor very sacred, we will not fight helpless creatures, it is very wrong. No worries, Yona can see now she was right, so we can go back now. Little colt can ride Yona’s back so he doesn’t have to walk” Yona said, not willing to fight what she thought was a soft little colt.

Smolder just sighed in relief, glad a fight was avoided altogether. “Whew, that was close…” She said silently to herself.

“Smolder, i-is that really him, are you sure?" Silverstream asked, shaking, as if a huge amount of energy was building inside herself.

“Yep, we should go over and actu-Woah! Silverstream?! Wait!” Smolder said, as it seems her confirmation had sent Silverstream flying off like a rocket… WAIT WAIT, SHE WAS HEADING RIGHT TOWARDS YOU!

“Ohhh, shit, what’s going ASDFASDSA” You hadn’t actually heard most of what was going on, and you certainly didn’t expect to be rocket rushed by a gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah…. “Gggmmmmmmmmmmmmm~” Suddenly, your thoughts and your speech enter a giant blur as you are snuggled onto the pillowy soft chest of this… adorable hippogriff. And oh god, she was giving you a gentle scratch on your head before twisting left and right with you in her snuggly grip.

“HE’S SO CUTE! HE’S SUPER CUTE! I’M SO GLAD HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE OUR STATUE OF HIM BECAUSE HE IS SOOOOO MUCH CUTER THAN IT! I’M HUGGING THE HERO COLT! I’M REALLY HUGGING THE LEGENDARY HERO COLT!” Silverstream then held you up like a puppy, her eyes shimmering as she asked with a whisper. “Can I keep you?”

Oh god, Anon, you are stronger than this, you know exactly what to say! “Yes…” You whisper back… Welp, you’re a dumbass.

Smolder was the first to approach from behind the cuddling hippogriff, she could see you drooling, blushing red, and utterly lost. You looked exactly how you reacted when she scratched your belly. It was then, finally, that Smolder realized the truth. “Geez, Anon, don’t you think you should have some dignity? Don’t you have a marefriend or something? I remember your aunt mentioning something about that.”

“Oh, Smolder.” Silverstream said with a giggle as she continued her cuddling. “Did I really give that impression to him? Gosh, I’m really flattered, but..” Silverstream held you to eye level again as she cheerfully said “I only meant to keep you for a day, Anon. I want to learn everything about you, especially about how you beat the Storm King! You could even teach me about your horn if you want! I heard it can be used for a lot of things! Legends say it’s the best weapon ever!”

Anon, goddamn… HOLY SHIT! Smolder was on to you, goddammit, were you that obvious?! You gotta break this hold this hippogriff has on you, it’s not that hard! “Sure, I’ll totally teach you how I use my horn… haha”

“OH MY GOSH! DID EVERYCREATURE HEAR THAT?! WOOHOO! I GET TO LEARN ALL ABO-oops!” In all her excitement, Silverstream accidentally tosses you straight up, way up high. And in your stupor, you don’t even bother to adjust yourself, causing you to fall onto your head like so many times before. It does nothing to you, it doesn’t even break you out of your stupor. “Anon, are you ok?! I’m so so so so so sorry! Oh no, this isn’t going to cause a war, is it?” Silverstream asked, already beginning to feel a need to panic.

“Relax, Silverstream, I don’t even think he was hurt.” Smolder said as she approached you, to look you over and doubly make sure you were ok.

“Are you sure? That was a good toss.” Gallus said as he approached as well, looking you over. “I really can’t see it, this guy beat the infamous Sharpclaw? How?”

“Who Sharpclaw?” Yona asked, also approaching your twitching blushing body. "I thought he beat Storm King"

“I guess he did? But there was also this griffon thief with really sharp talons… That for some reason named himself Sharpclaw. Guy was really good at what he did but really bad with aliases. Anon was the guy who apparently took him down for good.” Gallus said “I even heard he went nuts and color blind at the same time after he got arrested, really weird stuff.”

And that, somehow, broke you out of your stupor as the memory of Sharpclaw came back to you. And that’s only because it was connected to those fucks, the Flim Flam brothers, two guys who, since your interdimensional adventure, trigger you just by name. You slowly get up from the ground and look to the blue griffon to set the record straight. “Actually, I took down Sharpclaw AND his two goons a long whiles back. Sheesh, those guys were small fries, how do you mention that and not explain my amazing win against the Storm King?”

“Uh, because Silverstream never stops about that.” Gallus, a little annoyed with your words, was also surprised about how easily you just got back up. “But… Woah, you look pretty ok. You do know you landed right on your head, right?”

“Anon, I’m really sorry about that! You won’t declare war on Mount Aris, will you?” Silverstream said, nearly biting at her own talons in fear of what you were going to say.

“It’s fine, trust me, it happens a lot. Which is why I heard a certain yak wanted to challenge me at a head smashing contest, that’d be you, right?” You say as you shoot a cool look to Yona.

“Yes, but as impressive as Anon falling on head and not getting hurt is, it’d be dishonorable to crush such small pony with powerful yak head.” Yona said, really no longer willing to fight due to how fragile you looked to her.

“Which, by the way, I’m actually ok with. Considering we really should be gett-” Smolder, who still felt guilty with her bet and wanting a fight between her friends, along with trailing off away from Ponyville and her assignment from Pinkie, gets interrupted by you as you look to Yona with determination. Oh no, hell no, even if you did agree to tie it, you weren’t going to let her think you were weaker than her.

“My head may look adorable and soft, but trust me, it’s more than enough to take you on. Take on any yak really. But I see, if you’re too scared, then I’m willing to let you go.” There we go, elegant but tempting. That should show her you mean business while still keeping your promise to Smolder… Who just brought her hand to her own face for some reason.

“Woah… This guy really does have guts. Or he’s just crazy.” Gallus said, rather impressed by the fact you’d just call out Yona like that.

“Well, from what I learned, Anon’s cutie mark is the mark of chaos! Isn’t that amazing!? It means he can do… OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Silverstream stopped herself once again when she realized you just insulted Yona. “Anon! You didn’t mean that, did you?! Yona is really nice, fun, sweet, and amazing!”

“I mean, I only meant it i-OOP!” And suddenly, Yona brought her head right to yours as she looked at you menacingly.

“Did Anon just insult Yona and entire yak tribe?” Yona asked you, in a rather threatening tone.

“Only if you aren’t willing to accept my challenge.” You say as you wink over at Smolder… Why did she not seem to be happy about this? Huh…

“Yona accept challenge! And Yona win! Go stand over there, Anon.” Yona points over to one side of the road as she begins to stomp to the other. Everyone but you hovers in the air to avoid the quakes caused by her stomping. Holy shit, you could barely get your goddamn footing. “When Yona count to three, we both run and smash heads. Winner is best yak left standing.” She says, with no hint of accepting that you could possibly beat her.

Sheesh, how were you even going to run towards her if her stomping caused you to bounce around like a football? C’mon, Anon, you had to do better than that. You may have to tie this thing due to a bet, but you weren’t going to let yourself lose either.

And then, Smolder suddenly hovered downwards towards you, seemingly annoyed about something. “Did you really have to egg her on about that, Anon?”

“What? What do you mean? I thought this was part of the whole bet thing. Remember? We agreed to that?” You remind her.

“Yes, but… Anon, we could have just walked away- Guh…” She could see it in your face, no matter how she explained it to you, this fight would have happened anyway not just due to the agreement, but because you also wanted to prove your worth. “Nevermind, look, just don’t get hurt out there, ok? And don’t hurt Yona either. Also, I gotta ask you something before this whole thing starts.”

Wut? “What’s that?”

“So, are you just like, girl crazy? Or does that whole affection thing your aunt mentioned really run that deep? Because, y’know, you do got a marefriend, don’t you?” Smolder asked you, wondering what the fuck was up with you. Especially when it came to the belly scratches and Silverstream’s affection.

Fuck! SHE REALLY DID CATCH ON! OH GOD, IF SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE A PERVERT… WHAT IF SHE TOLD FLUTTERSHY OR DIAMOND?! THE SHAME! Not to mention Discord fucking you over if Fluttershy did find out, yeesh. “E-erm, well, she said it herself, right? I just have a huge weakness for it, that's all. I-I just really like being cuddled... But er, trust me, I'm super loyal to my Diamond, yuppers, totally.” Fucking dammit, you were a male! You had needs! She'll never understand!

Smolder just raised an eyebrow at you, only half believing your words, but not wanting to get further into it due to Yona seemingly already ready to throw down. “Uh huh… Ok, whatever. Look, just try to make sure nocreature gets hurt, ok? Silverstream looks like she’s about to fall apart as is over there.”

“It’ll be fine, I promise, I got this.” Just a tie, Anon, remember that. It shouldn’t be that hard anyway, you were amazing at shit like this. You wanted to win, sure, but… Man, you wouldn’t want to upset your seemingly biggest fan, now would you?

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