Subject 69: Crystal Family Emergency
Argh. My head. The last thing I could remember was something about a retirement home being potentially blown up. Wait what?! Oh my god, it was true. Bon Bon--or Sweetie Drops--informed me of the situation a while ago! Okay, okay, no need to start panicking. But hold on. Didn’t Flurry state that she had business there this evening?
Okay now might be a good time to panic.
I was knocked out for a while from having passed out moments ago. I was sure that I was going to get another visit from my favorite old king, considering where I was. But luckily, I wasn’t completely out of it yet.
“...alright? You...okay?”
I heard a faint voice call out to me, and my eyes fluttered open. I came to find out that I had been resting on a bed...no. A couch? Damn, it felt good enough to pass as a bed. Just what sort of materials was this made of?
Anyhow, when I opened my eyes, I was face-to-face with four faces. Two alicorns, one pink, one white, a white unicorn stallion, a unicorn with a damaged horn, and a pink pegasus mare. They all stared at me as if I was some rare, strange creature that they had found and had no idea how to react to meeting for the first time.
Or one of those viral jokes about a squad laughing.
Needless to say, I was startled. “Aie!” I shouted and gripped the sofa with my hooves.
They all let out sighs of relief, and gave me some space.
“Oh, good. He’s awake,” Cadance moved back, and took a deep breath. “Let me go prep some tea. I’ll be right back. Wanna help me out, Tempest?” she said with a relaxed tone as she left for the kitchen with a quiet Tempest close by.
Cozy was second to lean back, and also exhaled. “Whew...I’m glad you’re okay, sir. You had me worried for a sec. How are you feeling?”
“I’m...okay, thanks.”
Flurry Heart was next. “That was a wicked tumble. Dad says that can happen sometimes. Did you have a prostate attack or something?”
“...!” I heard Shining make a gruff whinny, and pushed his daughter to the side with magic. “Ahem. What she means is that it’d be a bit bothersome if you upped and croaked on us. After all, someone needs to keep Cozy in line,” he had a nervous smile while he sweat bullets.
I’ll admit, the prostate comment hurt me just as much as it hurt him. I sincerely hoped that he would question his daughter about where she learned the term and taught her how to use it properly for the future.
The young alicorn protested. “Wha? She’s a grown mare, dad! We’re even working on this 20 million piece train set that you said your grandpa gave you.”
“It’s a tradition!” he pleaded with a wide grin as he pointed at the massive box. The train set had its very own tunnel, hill, ramps, and simulated steam. “This old set has been passed down to all of the first-borns in our family. Now it’s your turn, Flurrs!” the unicorn gave his daughter a playful ruffle of her mane with his hoof, much to her chagrin.
“Hrrrrmph,” her face scrunched up with annoyance, “can you at least give us some space? I can’t work on this if you’re beating a dead horse about it.” She pushed her father’s hoof away with her magic. “Let us breathe.”
“Fine, fine. But if you need anything, just holler,” Shining offered with a smile before he went out to one of the balconies to water some plants.
Flurry sighed. “Whew...thank goodness. Dad’s usually not like that, but anyway, how are you feeling, sir?”
I sat upright upon the couch with my hind legs dangling off. “I’m alright. Sorry. I don’t know what just happened. I think...you might’ve scared me, heh.” I played it off the best I could. I absolutely could not let the child know that there was something as dangerous as a bomb threat. But I need to alert at least one of her parents. “With Nightmare Night coming up, and all. You’ve already done wonders. Just try not to scare the elderly ponies, hm?”
She waved her hoof, “Pshaw! No way. I’d never try that. Old ponies are impossible to scare. They’ve seen everything by this point!”
What an interesting, yet reasonable perspective. It was only legitimate, after all. The older you got, the more horrors you saw. The more you saw, the less it frightened you. Heh. How disturbing. Most children would wet themselves at the idea of killing somepony else. But now? It was part of my job.
Of course, I was used to the idea of murderous destruction since I was little, but let us not speak of that.
“Heh. Righty-o. Hey, where’d your dad go?”
Flurry pointed to the balcony garden. Wait, a garden on a balcony? What? “Outside. Can’t miss it.”
I tipped my hat, and got up from my seat. “Thank you, little lady." I decided to tell Shining Armor first, given that he probably had experience with hostile takeovers before. What with being a former Guard of Canterlot and all. Level with me on this one.
Just as Flurry described, her father was outside on one of the many castle balconies. It was large enough to function as a small garden with at least a dozen potted plants all around. Very pretty, I must admit.
“There we go, and that’s done,” Shining muttered to himself as he fixed a flower pot with a sunflower inside of it.
“Prince Armor,” I trotted out, and shut the balcony doors behind me, so that no one else inside could hear what I had to say. “First off, lovely upper garden you have going.”
“Thank you,” he replied, “It’s another hobby of mine. But more importantly, I’m glad you helped get that scum Neighsay off the streets. I had no idea that our own parents were asked to participate in such a thing. Dad never mentioned that to me.”
I winced and ground my teeth together. “Yeah...but it was a good thing we stopped it when we did. Who knows just how many more ponies he would’ve manipulated if it got worse.”
He sighed. “I know there’s no way to make conflict disappear forever. But at the very least, I know we can try our best to fight back.”
What a perfect segue. “That’s part of the reason why I came out to you today, sir.”
“Hm? What’s the problem.”
It was simple. I explained the details of what my higher-ups had explained to me moments prior. The situation was dire, but I believed the situation could be solved if we acted carefully. To my surprise, the Prince’s reaction was rather calm.
“I see...well, I’m certainly not allowing Flurry Heart to go there,” he said as he gave a concerned look towards his daughter as she helped Cozy with the train. “But what about the Old Folks’ Home itself? Should we evacuate?”
I shook my head. “No way. If we do that, then the bomber will know that we know their plans. They’re likely to remotely detonate it as soon as they see a few ponies walk out.”
“Are there any demands? A ransom?” Shining asked, “Bomb threats don’t just occur for no reason.”
In the back of my mind, I knew. Damn well, too. A retirement home with a bomb threat? Heh. Asshats knew me far too well for this to work. “I’ll be honest,” I said with a light chuckle, “Heh...they’re probably after me.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Years ago...well, when I was a colt…”
Another harsh explanation. I dreaded every single word as I recounted the events that led up to where I was now in my life. The main topic of discussion was the retirement home in Manehattan that I nearly destroyed in my youth.
Shining looked away, “Ah...now I get it. They’re trying to stir up trauma in you by bringing up your past misdeeds.” He turned around, and started to water a lily via magic. “I can relate somewhat. When I was younger, I made lots of idiotic mistakes as well. The bullies in my class always tried to make use of them against me.”
They said that curiosity killed the cat, but I just had to know. “Oh? What was your biggest screw-up, Prince?”
“Well…” Shining rubbed his chin as he gave it some thought, “ever set off bottle rockets?”
My answer was swift. “Dozens. Nearly wrecked an entire hillside with them.”
“...Oh. Well then I guess this’ll be easy to explain. To make a long story short, I tried pulling a prank on one of the deans at Canterlot Academy. Needless to say, they never let me live it down. And what it sounds like whoever is pulling this stunt is trying to do the same to you,” he pointed at me.
I rolled my eyes. “Great…” Interesting little story from the unicorn, but what I needed to do now was focus on what was ahead. “But I won’t allow that to deter me. I’ll find, and put a stop to whatever nefarious plot is being planned. And I already have a sneaking suspicion as to who’s involved.”
“You do?”
Possibly. Though, I wasn’t about to expose my cards just yet. “Call it a hunch, but I think I already know what to do. I’ll need all of the Crystal Guards on standby and ready to act at a moment’s notice, if you place.”
Once again, the Prince surprised me with his snappy level of response. “On it. I’ll inform Cadance in private, and send a messenger out right away. Any threat like this will need to be dealt with seriously, and quickly,” he replied with a stern gaze. I guess now I knew just where Twilight’s tenacity came from.
I raised an eyebrow. “You trust my word? Even after all that you said to me before? Even regarding Cozy in there?”
“I asked Twilight about information on you. She told me to ask Sweetie Drops, so I did. As it turns out...you’re quite the agent. With a history like yours, I probably should’ve listened to you from the beginning.” He rubbed the back of his head, “...Twilight also told me more information about that kid’s life and how she essentially had it stolen from her. If Flurry was in her position...I’d let her work her way back into trust as well.”
Well, I could respect that line of thinking. Even if he didn’t fully trust Cozy Glow right away, that was fine. So long as he offered her the fair chance he would offer his daughter. I suppose that’s why those two young mares got along so well.
“I appreciate that, but,” I waved my hoof in denial, “You were doing your job as a father, and a Prince. Don’t ever be ashamed of that. But I do appreciate the fact that you went back and did research of your own. Now that you trust me, we can work together to stop whatever sick-minded menace is out there that wants to harm the elderly.”
That’s when Cadance popped her head through the balcony doors. “Is everything alright out here? You two have been chatting for quite a--Oh!”
“Perfect timing.” Shining pulled her in close to him with his magic, and closed the door. “Hun, we have a problem.”
“Oh?” The pink alicorn looked at me with concern, “What’s the matter, Pale?”
One explanation later…
“Hm…” Cadance trotted to the edge of the balcony, and looked out over the Empire. “I see. But isn’t it possible for me to do something like a teleportation spell to evacuate everyone instantly?”
I hadn’t considered that, but even so, we had to be careful. “While that may be plausible, it’s possible that our enemy is keeping a close watch over the scene,” I walked up next to her as I stated my piece, “plus, teleporting that many ponies at once requires a high concentration of magic that can be easily detected by a skilled earth pony or a magic device.”
She turned her head to look at me. “Then what do you suggest we do, detective?”
“What else? I’ll sneak in there myself, defuse it, and find the culprit myself.”
Shining stepped forward next. “What? Are you kidding? That’s far too risky! You could end up captured or worse!”
“Relax, old man,” I let out a snide scoff, “I have my allies all around, and the Guards can erect defensive magic in an instant, can’t they?”
“...They can, yes,” he replied with an uncertain look in his eyes, “But are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
I looked into my coat, and checked to make sure all of my weapons were ready. “Hey, I owe you for that time your daughter followed me, don’t I? As far as I’m concerned, this is just another day at the office. All I ask is that you keep both Flurry and Cozy away from this while I work.”
Cadance gave me a playful nudge with her hoof. “Aw, are you dumping your daughter onto us? Well, I was known as the top foalsitter when I was younger, so I guess I can honor that request,” she said with a smug, evil sort of smirk that was meant to directly get a rise out of me.
Unfortunately, it did. Though only minorly. I stuttered with a hint of rose on my cheeks. “I--gh! I’m her handler. Not her father.”
She giggled into her hoof. “I’m only joking. Of course we’d be happy to look after her while you’re busy. Right, hubby?”
I looked up, and watched as Shining Armor read from a book. It had a red cover and the title was ‘How To Counter Worldwide Threats’. “Hm? Oh, sure! No problem. Heh…”
“Shiny--we talked about this. Cozy Glow has no more threatening powers or abilities. If anything, I’m more concerned for her when you consider our child is basically a walking, talking nuke.”
“Yeah, I was reading it for Flurry,” he responded quickly.
Cadance threw her head back. “Gah! You are impossible. But that’s what I love about you. Oh!” she suddenly turned to address me, “Sorry, Pale. Everything will be in its proper place for this evening. Until then, you’re more than welcome to join us all for some--”
I shook my head. “Thank you, but I’ll be fine,” I said as I trotted past the two of them, “I need to take a walk, and gather my thoughts on my own for a but. But I’ll certainly return before the mission begins.”
“Oh, that’s understandable,” Cadance replied and waved, “See you later then, sir! Shiny, put the damn book away.”
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Defusing a bomb is difficult. Depending on if its a normal bomb, a magic bomb or both in one package.
Blame Auntie Twilight and her Castle-size library. Also...
Seriously? Who writes those books?
10491528
Yeah. But Pale is no stranger to defusing them. Don't worry.
And these books always come up at the best times lol.
😁 Nice to see Pale's awake.
I get why he wouldn't tell Flurry and Cozy to protect them from danger, but Tempest used to be a commander. She should be let in on this threat.
😞 Neither did your mom, Shining.
Called it.
Yeah, it starts with an 'S', and ends with 'gallop'.
Wow. He's taking charge in strides.
😁 Keep telling yourself that, Pale.
I hope he's reading that for the current bomb threat and not Cozy herself.
Mm-hmm. Suuure.
Or take it from him. That works, too.
10491583
Yup. Pale is done taking chances with things, and is ready to fight back. Thankfully the Royal Family trusts him now!
10491706
Not wrong. Super lucky that they turned it down...
That bit with Shiny and the book, do you think he is jealous of the Alicorns for being credited for saving Equestria a lot more than he did, even with all the effort he mustered or didn't get a chance to?