• Published 14th Aug 2020
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Interviews With Equestrians - Jmaster49



A look inside the hidden perspectives of the average pony by your average joe. Starting with the imprisonment of Cozy Glow, this pony sets out to expose the hidden problems of Equestria that its residents have a right to know.

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Subject 146: Buggy Witness

I officially had too much on my damn mind to be able to think straight. Between Cozy and her deep knowledge of the world at large, Elytra’s plans, and Mane-iac? I was a mane-hair away from blowing my stack. I needed to relax, and keep my mental state in order before I kept going on this case. Flash Drive and the others could manage the details of the evidence that they found.

So I went home to meditate. Tree Hugger had been quite the influence on tactics to contain my sanity, and mental exercises were perfect in that regard. This job was a hard one, but it had to be done. Sadly, not many could do this job, so I had to make sure that I held onto my position with as much confidence as I held my own in battle. It was difficult for me to fall asleep that night, but I managed.

The next morning, I woke up with a newfound sense of motivation as I got out of bed, and made breakfast for myself. After which, I showered to clear my head, and got my thoughts in order. Okay. My objective for that day was to simply set all of my ducks in a row and look over the evidence that Flash Drive would no doubt have to present to me from yesterday.

DING-DONG!

Speak of the devil. That was my doorbell. It was Drive, more than likely.

“Coming!” I called out as I walked up to the door. But once I got there, I hesitated. I could hear two voices that snapped back and forth at each other. One was Drive’s and the other was stern but feminine. Who could that be?


Ten Minutes Ago…

Flash Drive made his way to Pale’s home with some new information. On his way there, he accidentally bumped into another unicorn--a mare. “Oof!” he fell to the ground, and quickly stood up. “Apologies, mate. Are you injured?”

“No, not at all,” Moondancer replied as she stood, “thanks.”

Drive desired to sate his curiosity by asking her a question. “Pardon the inquiry, madam, but where are ya headed in such a rush, eh?”

“I’m off to a certain pony’s home to report some important classified information,” the unicorn mare replied as she fixed her glasses on her face via magic, “Nothing I can really explain to a civilian.”

The jet-black unicorn chuckled. “Civvie? Heh...do I look so unimportant?” he shot back, and trotted onwards, “I’m off to do the same thing, actually.”

“Really?” she replied, “Interesting. Good luck with that.” “He must be an officer or an official as well,” she thought to herself.

“Same to you, madam.”

And they continued on their separate ways...or so they thought. As it turned out, they were both on their way to visit Pale Vestige at the same time on that very morning. But neither of them wanted to point it out due the fear of how awkward the situation had become.

“...Oh damn, is she off to see Pale as well?” Drive mused in his head, “Well that’s gonna be a way to start the day, innit?”

Moondancer glanced at him for a split-second before she turned her head. “Seriously? Things are gonna be twice as hard with this guy in my way. I can’t afford any distractions.”

There was a long, drawn-out silence between the two. Palpable and awkward, it caused the unicorns to feel even more uncomfortable as time went on. Unfortunately for Drive, Moondancer was absolutely not the type to break the ice in any capacity whatsoever.

So he decided to finally say something. “Well then...looks like we're off to the same direction, yeah?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yes...it would appear so.” After a minute or two, she finally saw fit to address him properly. “Look, sir. I don’t need anypony getting in the way of the important business I need to discuss. I have a lot on my plate as it is. So if you could be so kind as to wait until we’re finished talking before you try to speak with him, I’d appreciate it.”

“Yikes. Talk about starting off on the wrong hoof,” he thought to himself. “Listen, madam. I believe we don’t have the proper first impressions of each--”

“I don’t desire to have a first impression of you at all,” she replied bluntly, “All I want is to complete the task that was assigned to me. No offense to you, alright? Working in Canterlot is just a giant ball of stress.”

“Ah. Does that explain why she’s so antsy? Best avoid messing with her too much, then,” Drive thought as he fell silent. Though, he couldn’t help but take a look at the mare’s saddlebags, and the contents that rustled around within. One of which was a book on voodoo? “No way...is she into the ways of the Zebs as well?”

She must have heard him, because her tail flicked. With her pinkish-purple magic aura, she shut her bag tighter to avoid prying eyes. “Mind your own business,” she grumbled.

Sadly, Flash Drive wasn’t about to drop the topic so easily. “Wait, wait--I just want to know what types of magic you have interest in!”

“I said quit bothering me, sir,” she spat back, “I want absolutely nothing to do with you. You couldn’t possibly begin to comprehend the things I’ve seen and done.”

The unicorn stallion took that a bit personally as he raised a brow. “What’s that supposed to mean, madam? Are you just making the assumption that I won’t have any knowledge of dark arts from far off lands? I probably know more about it than you.”

“...Is that so?” She asked with a curious, yet sarcastic tone that belied her interest, “I’d like to see just how smart you are, then…”

“Oh, don’t sell me short. I can show you what I know firsthoof.”

And that’s when they arrived at Pale’s doorstep…


I opened my front door, and found both Moondancer and Flash Drive talk back and forth about their knowledge of different types of magic. Zebra magic to be specific. It seemed interesting, but there were bigger things on my mind for the moment. I decided to break them up.

“Ahem,” I commented to catch their attention, “Is there something you both need?

Flash Drive spoke up first. “Bruv. We found evidence that links a few sources to the crime scene. Some of which include ponies that have been dead for a long time.”

“I see…” Well now, that just sounded impossible by nature. Just how could that be if...unless...okay I needed more details. But first, I needed to hear out Moondancer as well. “And what’s going on on your end, ma’am?”

“I brought along somepony that wants to speak with you,” she said rather simply.

Both Drive and I were taken aback by this, given that she had shown up by herself.

“Erm…” I took a look above, around, and behind her, “...Just who are you referring to?”

From within her saddlebag, Moondancer levitated out what appeared to be a cube-shaped puzzle block. “Elytra. I shrunk her and transported her into this so she wouldn’t try to escape by turning into someone else. If she did that, I’d lose her and I don’t have time for nonsensical failures.” She put it away. “Do you mind if I come inside so that she may speak with you?”

Impressive to say the least. But what could Elytra have to discuss with me? There was only one way to find out for sure. “No problem. Come on in.” I stepped aside to allow her entry.

“Thank you,” Moondancer replied as she trotted in.

Meanwhile, Flash Drive chuckled to himself as she stepped into my home. “Heh. Ooh, she’s good. Never would’ve considered such a tactic myself, honestly.”

“Pfft. So that’s what’s been going on. You’ve been trying to communicate with her for the last few minutes?” I gave a pitiful sigh, “Ah, while she might prove to be a good research partner, I’m not sure how well she’d work with others, friend. She has been a helpful asset to my cases, and it would be beneficial if we could talk more amicably, but I’m not holding my breath.”

This didn’t deter him, though. Drive was more than ready to tackle such a challenge. “Sounds like a load of tosh to me. If there’s a way I can get through to her, then I’ll try.”

So we all went inside, and Moondancer had broken the spell that allowed the powerless changeling to be free.

ZAP!

In an instant, the weak bug pony stood before us, in the living room. She didn’t speak. All she did was glare at us with those judgemental, solid blue eyes of hers. Without her power, I suppose she felt embarrassed to be forced to speak with regular ponies.

“Hmph,” she grumbled and looked away from us, “There’s no way under any circumstance that I’ll tell you imbeciles anything.”

“It’d be in your best interest to cooperate,” Moondancer commented from the couch with equally annoyed eyes of her own, “You have no chance of winning at this point, so you’d better spill everything you know.”

“No,” the changeling said, and childishly stuck out her tongue, “Nyeh!”

This angered the unicorn mare even more. She rubbed her temples with her hooves. “Gah...this isn’t how this is supposed to--”

“Hang on,” Flash Drive got up from the couch, and went to my kitchen, “I’ve got an idea.”

I looked up. “Hey, uh, now’s not the time to think with your stomach, bud.”

“Don’t worry, boss,” he replied as he levitated some objects from the fridge. “I’ve got this.”

One of Moondancer’s ears flicked as she heard more rustling from the kitchen. “What is he up to…?” “This’ll be interesting. Let’s see if he actually knows what he’s doing.”

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