Interviews With Equestrians

by Jmaster49

Subject 1: Schoolteacher

“I don’t understand it. So much right with the world and yet so much so wrong. Is it really the best way to handle things? I wonder…” I sat at my desk, thinking about the state of affairs in Equestria. Several documents laid out before me such as old files from the Mayor’s office and a few books from the library that detailed the creation of different types of magic artifacts. “Dammit. I’m getting nowhere. Maybe I should pack up and head home.”

Me? I was a typical worker in the system, trying to make life easier from the shadows. Earth Pony. Gray coat, black mane, and a killer sense of justice. The name? Pale Vestige.

“Sir! The precinct is all closed down for the day!” A cream-colored mare with a black mane appeared from behind the door to my office, one of my deputies. Quick Draw. “Oh...are you still thinking about that again? You know it’s rather pointless, right? You should get home soon. It’s gonna start raining.”

“I’m aware,” I grabbed a hat and coat from a nearby rack and put it on. It was my usual investigative attire. “But still. A society that’s blind to the actions of its ruler isn’t much of a society is it? I’m just pondering multiple points of view.”

And that set her off. She scoffed, seemingly unfazed by my attempts to persuade her. No matter, she was always stubborn. But that’s what made her so good at her job. “Suit yourself sir. I’ve done my job for the day so I’m gonna be heading home now.” With no further words, she exited the building with a gallant trot. It was a detective agency in the middle of Ponyville. Or rather, hidden under the guise of an antique shop.

I was the last to leave the building that night. Now on my own, I decided to head out on the grassy road. Quiet. Just how I liked it.

“It’s been a while since Cozy Glow was imprisoned along with the rest of the Legion of Doom. Strange name for a team up but whatever. Many of us still think that the filly should’ve been offered a second chance. Yes, she was dangerous and nearly caused mass destruction. And yet many of the princesses’s other enemies in the past did the same. They even extended a hoof to Queen Chrysalis. The tyrant who tried to destroy the entire Crystal Empire and the world on multiple occasions. It just doesn’t add up…”

My mental wheel was spinning. It was hard to think with so much, and yet, so little going on all at once. Maybe Quick Draw was right. Perhaps it was time for me to hang it up--

“Oof!”

I took a tumble. Turns out I had bumped into someone who rounded the corner. “My apologies,” I swiftly rose to my hooves and checked to see if the other pony was alright. A mare, purple with a pink mane. She seemed familiar...ah yes. The teacher at the local schoolhouse.

“Oh no it’s alright,” she got up as well. Thankfully, with not so much as a scratch on her. “A little bump never hurt anyone. We’ve all dealt with far worse, am I right?” She said with a giggle. An attempt to make the best of an awkward moment. Good move on her part.

I decided to indulge in it as well with a laugh of my own. “Haha! Yes...far worse. I’ve been under a lot of stress due to paperwork lately, so forgive me. I should generally be more careful.”

“Ugh, tell me about it. Scribbling down the same signatures and grades over and over and over will make anypony go mad,” she said with her eyes comically spinning around to match her delirious state of agony, “Luckily I already have ways to calm myself down if need be. Clears the mind and readies me for my next set of work.”

Impressive. I didn’t suspect someone like her to have such detailed abilities to manage. Then again, teaching children is one of the most daunting tasks in the world. Almost as hard as saving it. “Hm. Perhaps I could learn a thing or two from you. You seem to have it all figured out.”

She shook her head in a bashful manner, rubbing her left hoof against her right. Seems she wasn’t one to brag about herself. I respected that. “Oh no. I’m nothing special. We teachers have to keep everything in place unless we wanna lose our minds--oh dear. I didn’t introduce myself! My name is Cheerilee. It’s nice to meet you sir.”

Her hoof extended for a hoofshake, so I accepted. Would be rude not to, after all. “Pale Vestige, at your service. And I concur, it’s very nice to meet you too, Ms. Cheerilee.” After the friendly shake, I started on my way again. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to be going.”

“Will you be alright? Looks like quite the storm coming…”

At first, I ignored her concern. “I will be fine, thank you.”

And yet, to my horror, I felt a wet droplet hit the top of my head. Then two, then four, then a dozen. The accident led me to forget my deputy’s words regarding the weather. But no matter. I wouldn’t be deterred. Everything would be fine if I just--

ZAP!

Lightning struck, followed by an admittedly comical sequence of a complete downpour would occur around me. I was immediately drenched from head to hoof, and my home was too far away to deal with these conditions. “...Gah.”

For better or worse, the schoolteacher ran up to me. “I live right nearby! Come in and dry off until it clears!”

“Really I--woah!” Before I could get another word in, she had already grabbed my hoof and practically dragged me to her home. The fellow Earth Pony wouldn’t take no for an answer. Though, I had no room to refuse, given that these weather conditions were atrocious.

She tossed me a towel, so I used it to dry myself off. I flicked my tail to get rid of the rest, “Thank you. You’re too kind…” and I immediately felt guilty for accepting her offer.

“It’s no trouble for a fellow quill pusher. Since you were so kind to apologize after that little tumble, I figured I should return the favor,” she sat down in a rocking chair with a book. Such hospitality was lost on me since I never really took favors. It was made even more awkward when she allowed me to rest. “Well? Don’t just stand there. Take a seat. You must be awfully tired from your work. Would you like some tea?”

Once again, I was beaten by the logic of kindness. True indeed, my late work hours had proved difficult. So I accepted yet again, taking a seat on the couch. “...Thank you very much, ma’am. But I’m okay. You don’t need to go out of your way for me.” As if I needed more arrows of guilt fired into my chest.

“Well, if you’re sure. But don’t be afraid to ask, hm?”

I shut my eyes for a moment. My cases had been rather relaxing lately, and yet there was something on my mind: Cozy Glow. Did she really deserve to be locked away like Tirek and Chrysalis? Was there some other way that could’ve proven better for her? Did they try to reach out to her? Something was--

EEEEEE!

“AH!” I leapt from my seat and assumed a combat stance, prepared to turn any of the objects in the room around me into a weapon. Until I realized that I made a complete dunce of myself. The mare was simply removing the kettle from her stove. “Ugh…” I dropped my stance, completely embarrassed at myself.

Wait a second…

“She deals with kids all the time…” I muttered under my breath. I wonder what exactly her opinion would be on such matters. It’d be a good way to start off my report at the very least. But first, I needed to break the proverbial ice. “Ahem--Ms. Cheerilee? On second thought...maybe I will accept some tea.”

“Oh? Alrighty, then. Would you like extra sugar?”

“Please.”

We sat down for a moment as we sipped tea. I listened to her small rants about her troublesome students, and how she would often feel the desire to physically remove her mane with her own two hooves. I can relate, albeit somewhat.

“...and then don’t even get me started on Snips and Snails. But you know? I appreciate you taking the time to listen. My friend--the Mayor--she’s equally busy as I so we never have the chance to talk like this outside our lunch breaks.”

“I hear that, but now I have a question for you.”

“Oh?”

I took another sip from my warm cup, and placed it on the coffee table. “You are aware of the events regarding the saving of the world? And how multiple high-level fugitives were put to stone?”

“Mm-hmm. Why do you ask, Mr. Vestige?”

“Well…I want your opinion on something. Or rather, someone. Cozy Glow in particular.” As soon as her name left my lips, the teacher’s expression became uncertain. Her eyes slowly leaned towards the left as she sipped her tea.

“Cozy Glow…I remember. The filly…”

“I’m aware the subject matter is sensitive, but I need your honest thoughts: Do you think she deserved imprisonment? To my knowledge, she was never given the opportunity to redeem herself in the ways that Discord and Starlight Glimmer were. I’ve only heard whispers of the punishment being unfair, but never any outward speech.”

I readied my notepad, secretly eager to hear her response. The schoolteacher set her tea down and took a deep exhale. “...She could have easily been a child in my class. That’s what saddens me the most. She was a dangerous, and chaotic filly that deserved to learn a lesson. But to be in stone for eternity? I...do not feel that’s right. At the very least, she should’ve been given the chance to come down and learn to walk the right path. But now she never will…”

Once she finished speaking, she picked up her tea again. My heart felt like it had been removed all the sudden. No beat whatsoever. So it was true that certain people didn’t feel like she had been done justice. “I’m sorry to hear that. But...does this mean you think Twilight and the other princesses made a wrong decision?”

Another heavy exhale from the purple mare. The conversation had already taken a toll on her, and the amount of culpability brewing in my chest was thick enough to scoop like ice cream.

“I do. I don’t think they made the right choice. But as a mere teacher, it’s not my place to question their decisions. They’ve been ruling for as long as we can remember, so I’m sure their intentions are beyond our comprehension.”

“I...understand. And please forgive me for dumping such a heavy load on you at this hour. You don’t deserve such--”

She cut me off with a wave of her hoof, “Shh, shh. It’s fine. I deal with sad stories from time to time, so I don’t mind. I hope that I could help you in your investigation, Mr. Vestige.”

“You have. Very much so. And please, call me Pale. Mr. Vestige was my father.” A classic joke to hopefully lighten the mood.

That got a chuckle out of her, thankfully. “Hehehe. Pale it is.”

At last, the weather had cleared. The night sky was as beautiful as ever with the stars darting against the moonlight. With that in mind, I rose from the couch. “Thank you for your hospitality, Cheerilee. But now that the weather has given me mercy, I shall be taking my leave.”

“Oh, okay! Let’s have another chat sometime, whenever you’re free!”

After all that, I wouldn’t dare turn her down. “Of course. Goodnight ma’am.” I left the house, and headed towards my own. The quiet, fresh night air beaming into my muzzle. It felt good to be out again, knowing that I’d be home in my bed soon. But moreover, knowing that there are people out there who disagree with the teachings of the Princesses made me more inquisitive. Just what else could be improved upon in this vast place we call Equestria?

I smirked, knowing full well what my next move would be.

The game’s ahoof.

Comments

[asdtroi8895]

This is certainly a unique way to approach the Cozy Glow situation. I believe that she was treated unfairly and many others do so as well and it would make sense that some of the average citizens of Equestria would as well. Most Cozy fics ignore this aspect and focus solely on the ones reforming her or directly talking about or interacting with her. I'm very interested to see how this will play out.

[Jmaster49]

10384342
Yup! That's my intent here. Everyone usually skips straight to her being freed, but we never see how that judgement is reached. The idea is that Pale Vestige is going to be the one gathering a consensus and stepping up to the plate for himself to make a case for the filly. No matter how hard it is. Thanks for checking it out!

[Xanderfox]

Just at the frost chapter and it makes me think how there are aspects of the Princesses ponies tend to be depicted as not getting. Logicly they made misunderstandings that make sense,one of the big ones being that they can't question them, as outsiders the viewer/reader is away the Princesses would actually react positively to being questioned and consider the views of the regular pony, but really the regular ponies wouldn't know that.

[Bigby Wolf]

Hmm. Very curious.

I'll be honest though; I've seen other shows with child villains, like Law and Order, who not only had no remorse for their crimes but honestly enjoy what they're doing.

Sometimes they even give the impression of "Haha I'm a kid, you can't do anything to me!"

Because of these factors I'm numb to the whole "just a child" reasoning. Or the notion that there always has to be a tragic reason behind why they do what they.

It happens of course but not all the time. Sometimes, pardon my French, people are just little shits no matter how old they are or what you do for them. Now I'm making it perfectly clear I don't believe the notion someone is somehow born evil, I just believe it's possibly for someone to become a remorseless sociopath even at a young age.

Or as Alfred Pennyworth says "Some men just want to see the world burn." That applies to children too. Some kids just want to see the world burn as much as the adults do.

Now I'll admit Cozy Glow gets some leeway because the writers never gave her any kind of backstory. Why is that by the way? In fact, did we really need a Big Bad child villain? Diamond Tiara the schoolyard bully was a fitting child antagonist, there was no need for a child as a major villain. I think the writers were too focused on the twist villain aspect (Chancellor Neighsay is the season's Big Bad? Nope: it's Cozy Glow?! What a twist!) to question whether or not it was actually a good idea. Sure she had her moments but I was up for Chrysalis, Sombra and Tirek being the Legion of Doom rather than Cozy.

Anyway I'm rambling; back to Cozy Glow herself. Now as for her first defeat: on the one hand we were never given an onscreen explanation as to why the princesses chose to send her straight to Tartarus. On the other hand she wasn't all bothered by it; first thing she did was try to manipulate Tirek with her "insincere syrupy sweetness" as Tirek himself put it.

Season 9 comes along and while she, Tirek, and Chrysalis were victims/pawns of Discord's plan to give Twilight confidence, they made it clear once they were calling the shots they didn't care about who they hurt in turn. Unrepentant, all three of them.

Cozy was fine with making the ponies fight each other, was only concerned how the Windigos would be a threat to her personal wellbeing, and willingly joined in threatening to tear off Spike's wings to make the Mane Six back down.

So I'm curious. What atrocities would child villains like Cozy have to do before "they're just a child" was irrelevant?