Outpost 13...often considered the most unlucky posting to be given when you’re a Royal Guard. It holds no real tactical value, and was built long ago before the Unification Period of the Three Pony Tribes. It’s now more of a historical site, being the last-standing remnant of a bygone era. It’s useless, it’s remote, and it’s boring.

And it’s the perfect dumping ground for when you want to get rid of three of the Royal Guard’s worst soldiers ever.

Private Samwise Tater (the Thinker), Corporal Plucky Guess (the Cynic), and Private Prism Rain (the Sleeper) --- the three of them have been at Outpost 13 for one year now, all on their own. Once you’ve been there that long, you begin to develop a routine: wake up at 0600, eat, then stave off boredom for the next 18 hours before it’s time to go to bed. Usually by talking or planning ways to take over the world, or if nothing else, how to raid Princess Celestia’s cake stash without getting caught.

Today’s their one year anniversary, and they’re at their breaking point.

(Heavily inspired by Rooster Teeth’s Red Vs. Blue web-series.)

Featured: 2021/08/18 - 2021/08/23
*200 Likes! Thanks everyone!*

SPECIAL THANKS: Cover art by Hunternif (Sketch 41: “Early Morning”)

After years of being the runt of the litter (despite having no siblings), Spike finally comes into his own and starts to grow up and mature. The result is a unique bit of magic all his own, or so the theory goes: He awakens one morning to find words hanging overhead that call him [The Gamer], along with powers that let him 'live life as though it were a game'.

How he decides to handle all of this, and where things go from there? That would be a spoiler, and you all know how we feel about spoilers around here...

Frequently asked questions will be answered from time to time, and those answers linked here for the curious:
The First FAQ

You wake up in a land where magic is real and sapient ponies have built a civilisation. Being from a different universe, you have no understanding of their language or laws, but you're happy to have found yourself in the friendliest town there is. Good luck building a new life as their favourite... monkey thing.

Spike carries each of the most important ponies in his life home after a long day.

A commission-turned-gift for B_25

UPDATE: A Spanish language translation for Carry Me Home is now available, made by Spaniard Kiwi on his deviantart.

UPDATE (2024): Them's Writin' Words podcast did a wonderful review of this story. I appreciate all the thought and work put in to their critiques and all the kind words.

Anon E. Mouse, after stepping on the wrong bus is catapulted into a world of magic and mystery is in for the ride of his life. Having received the power of a legendary witch who disappeared, he must prove himself to an ancient order of witches and wizards while also trying to defeat an even more ancient evil.

Edited by Base Anonymous and Lordelliott

This story is a sequel to Anon Begins

It's been several months since the human, Anonymous, has taken permanent residence in Equestria with the bestest friends he could've asked for.

But life in this world is anything BUT normal. Having to deal with dogs, dance-offs and unfamiliar lands, Anon'll have to face the biggest threat of his life:

his EMOTIONS!!!

It's more serious than it all sounds...

This story is a sequel to Princess Is Sad? Boop the Snoot

Several months after his 'encounter' with Princess Celestia in the throne room, Anon's life had come to a bit of a lull. He was content in his solitude and was enjoying spending his days doing... not much at all.
And occasionally abusing boops to get his way, but that's less important.

When he comes to realize the difference between solitude and loneliness, he sets out to fix it.

After getting shipped off to Canterlot due to some slight misunderstandings and slight timberwolf attacks, there's a tab bit more to deal with than he'd expect.

Like Princess Luna. And rebuilding bridges with Twilight.
And Princess Celestia's odd behaviour.

Image, for those curious. Give the artist some love!
Previous Image used. Still, give this artist some love, too!

Previously featured multiple times- I can't put how thankful I am for that. I'm glad you folks enjoy my silly stories.

Now featuring my Ko-fi, if you're feeling generous!