//------------------------------//
// Chapter 62: Rapid Return 
// Story: Spike of All Trades 
// by Ariamaki 
//------------------------------//

Before Spike could even comment on the absurdity that had unfolded before them? Pinkie Pie beat him to it. The earth pony did some sort of acrobatic half-slink half-backflip out of her seat, flopping across the floor and springing back up onto her hooves. It would have been amazing to watch if he weren't so distracted by, well, everything else. She looked over to Spike with a big and extremely forced smile before waving at them both.

"That is super duper neat, b-but I've gotta go! To a place. For some things! I'll be back! Riiiiight back, I Pinkie-swear on that one."

She was gone well before either he or Twilight could even affirm they'd heard her... Which left him alone with Twilight and the quest. Quests plural, really... An entire year's worth, if the time limit was even slightly strict.

Twilight tried and failed to keep the mingled emotions out of her voice.
"Well Spike, I guess you are never ever allowed to get on my case for overreaching EVER again!"

"Awww come on Twilight, I was just putting an idea out there! How was I supposed to know the system would hold me to it without even a chance to get your opinion?"

She 'tapped' the screen in mid-air very pointedly, her hoof landing on the single step that was already completed: Asking Twilight for her perspective.
"It seems to think you already got my opinion, which is news to me! I should honestly be concerned with this level of ambition, especially so soon after you acquired this power... But from everything I know about both gaming and magic? It's not like your ability would give you an impossible task."

"...So you're not mad?"

She pulled him over into a one-legged hug, laughing softly.
"Spike, the only thing I'd be mad about is if you refused my help. Even if it says this is optional... I agree with the descriptive text. If you succeed then it's going to change the entire world forever. Not just Equestria, but everything."

"Big ask for a little dragon... Which is an excuse I can't even use anymore, because consistent size is totally optional for me now."

Twilight laughed at that, but it faded quickly.
"Speaking of optional, we can only hope that the part hidden behind that Error isn't required."

He frowned and looked over the list again... Assuming it was similar to the other quests and subquests, it couldn't be that bad, right?
"Why's that?"

"Look at all the first subquests in each header: It refers to us all as 'person of great power'. And then the Error says that 'a great power' is what's keeping you from seeing it. Which means whatever it is, your system thinks it's as powerful as a Princess!"

Spike shrugged and nudged her in the flank.
"If that's the case, it thinks you're as powerful as one too: At least in potential. And I'm inclined to agree!"

Twilight blinked rapidly for a few moments before burying her face in her hooves, trying and failing to hide her burning cheeks.
"Spiiike! That's not. I. UGH!"

He rolled his eyes and looked back to the objectives. Three very similar subquests with four objectives each, and then Twilight's category with six (one of which was already complete).
"Well hay, if we ignore the sort of nebulous final subquest for each Princess, at least this is all pretty simple... Helping Cadance aside. And then your requirements are extremely you."

"Do tell, Mr. Gamer."

"Like I said: Nebulous. Many days, untold instances, numerous relationships. But then we get down to your section and it's all hard numbers! 75 stats, 40 skills, 50 Observe... It's as rigorous as these things get, and I really appreciate that. In a way you're helping me already just by being yourself!"

"Ah yes, assistance-by-stereotype. So glad to help."

They both broke out giggling at that, because at this point sarcasm was their first shared refuge when things got particularly weird. When they got back to normal Spike could also tell that Twilight was trying to suppress a smile: That comment about her scientific and mathematical rigor had really hit where it counts.

"...I guess this means Cadance and Shiny really haven't finished figuring out her Benediction."

"Yeah, that's true enough: But it also means that unless I fail this quest, she will figure it out by the end of the year! It just might take a little outside inspiration from friends and family."

"Celestia only knows I've given her my fair share of that already: Ever since they got back from the honeymoon I've been helping her do research. Ritual techniques, sympathetic principles, even magic from outside of Equestria. That big batch of books on non-unicorn overt magic wasn't just for the sake of the Library, you know."

"That makes a lot more sense in retrospect."

Given the time he'd spent Observing all of the books and cases when unpacking it with the Crusaders yesterday, he knew quite well what topics they had covered: Zebrican potioncraft (he'd have to compare notes with Zecora, see if her knowledge was from a different tradition), modern occult practices, Griffon and Minotaur artifice... Anything and everything that had seen the publishing circuit in the last twenty years, as far as Spike could tell.

"Well, I'll do everything I can to help her... Which will be a lot more now than it would have been."

"We should see about getting some letters out to Celestia, Luna, and Cadance: We already contacted Luna about the Discord issue, but we'll need to arrange a proper visit."

"No rush: I mean, not in the short term anyways. I'd like to try getting things handled sooner than later of course, but if I'm going to be able to make real progress or help Cadance? I want to get my stats higher first. And we've got the party this weekend to think about!"

Twilight turned to look at the door, but the expected Pinkie did not rematerialize when ‘called’.
"...I'm sure she'll be back soon. Are you sure the stat requirements are going to be attainable? Like you said, experience is hard to come by from what you've seen so far."

"I'll figure something out... Whether I like it or not, if Luna's subquest is any indication."

"Yeeeeah, I am going to put that out of mind for now. Although the histories certainly do imply she was the more warlike of the Two Sisters."

Right on time with the mention of war, the front door of the Library suddenly buckled in. It didn't start breaking, instead almost comically stretching as it opened across the hinges to reveal a shambling mound of items. By the time the hulking heap poured itself inside, Spike wasn't even sure how it had managed: The stack of stuff was easily twice-again as tall as the door, and a little wider too. His confusion abated a little when he realized Pinkie Pie was the pony piloting this pile of peculiar particulars. Then his confusion was swiftly replaced with flashbacks to training with the Crusaders.

"Special delivery!"

Even if he hadn't figured out it was Pinkie from context (or her curly tail bushing out on one side of the mess) the muffled-yet-enthusiastic voice cinched it.
"You alright back there?"

It takes her a moment to catch her breath (had he ever really seen her out of breath before?) but her reply came out eventually, even as stuff started sloughing off the stack.
"Yepper-pepper! Sorry I had to dash so fast but I realized we'd worked up a ton of a sweat while cooking so I needed to freshen up at the lil' mares' room! Back home. En-suite to my bedroom. And then while I was there I realized I should totally bring more stuff so I can be a better helper!"

Now that Pinkie mentioned it, she had dragged a strong smell of buttercream icing back with her and the ever-decreasing pile of accoutrements. It was light enough to be pleasant rather than cloying, although he was curious just what she meant by 'better helper'...

Pinkie’s mane started to become visible as her speech sped up.
"See, 'cuz this whole thing is sort of my fault two ways right? Like, I gave you the idea to be all generalized and broadbase, and the quest that gave you the Ticket involved me too! So it'd be super-duper unfair if I weren't going to give 110% helping you get through this doozy of a dinger."

...ah, she meant it like that. He really wouldn't have put the blame on her, no matter what she was saying: If anypony was responsible for this giant pile of quest requirements it was Spike himself. But at the same time?
"I’m really glad to know somepony's got my back, Pinkie Pie: I'll be counting on you."

His reply synchronized perfectly with her total divestment of the stack. That meant he got to see her blue eyes go watery, right before she nodded so hard that her expression blurred in the air.
"Yes!"