• Published 13th Oct 2019
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Spike of All Trades - Ariamaki



"Wouldn't it be great if life were like a game?", some people ask. Spike can definitively answer... "Maybe."

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One if By Land: Part 7

The burning pain and the sharp pops and cracks of agony continued as Spike stood up. He could feel the mana-fueled silver sheen on his scales shuddering, his magic in an uproar. A thesis, huh? A central idea, a theme, a concept to hold it all together. It was very true: He didn't have one. His new Discipline was like an empty picture frame. He had learned and adapted and tried to make his own spin on things. In the end it was ideas from other ponies, from his system, from outside sources...

That could come later: Right now he brought his breath back to the center. Going into combat with his entire body breaking down would be a really stupid decision, and even though he was giddy from success right now? He wasn't that overwhelmed. In, in, out through the mouth. He smacked his lips and tongue with a sense of displeasure. Something... There was a feeling in the back of his head, a sense that something was wrong.

Ah.

It was the smell. This place reeked like Bermite, smelled of insectile filth and ruined stones. Even the crackle of fireworks couldn't overwhelm the stink in the air, and the longer he thought about it the angrier it made him. He had plans for this place, these tunnels and caverns that had been made in duress. Under his command the Dogs could survive and thrive, return home triumphant, and leave behind this new lair as his rightful tribute.

But before any of that could happen he needed to clean house.

Spike closed his eyes and made the pain worse for himself: Dragon's Hoard dialed up to the max, his body swelling and creaking even as it burned and dissolved. Like a chemical process in reverse he melted up, growing huge and full of power. Power and anger in equal measure, his hatred of the Queen and her idiot mate only getting worse. Any proper parent would have stopped that needless sacrifice, or made its own sacrifices to protect them. Real parents wouldn't just take their egg and abandon it to be left alone in a dusty store-room for decades until some random stroke of fate let him out...

Spike, the dragon, towered over everything in the room. His voice projected low and rumbling.

"It's time to stop."

The insects didn't hear him and his marefriend didn't listen: Pinkie Pie was still fighting her heart out down below, looking like a smudge of pink darting across the floor and through the air. Bursts of colorful confetti and terribly sharp near-molten stones came blasting out with equal likelihood, and something in his heart warmed at the sight... But then he saw the streaks of blood and bruising, her coat torn and burnt and patchy in places.

His voice this time was less rumble and more thunder, the booming clap of a lightning strike.

"I said STOP!"

The scream echoed from one wall to another, feeling like it shook the entire world.


By attempting to use [????] without the skill, you have triggered the [Dragon's Pride].

Unfortunately you do not have the bearing required to truly rule as dragons must do.


Pinkie stopped now, falling back and looking up at him. Up and up and up: Earlier he’d matched the Bermite Queen in size but now he was easily scraping the roof of the chamber, smoke pouring from his nostrils as he huffed and puffed... She looked scared. It was only for a fraction of a second but she was scared of him. For him? She was worried about him.

That brought everything back into perspective, and he let himself be still. His head had been clear the whole time, but there had been something on the edge of perception... It wasn't worth his time. He smiled down to Pinkie Pie, his grin tentative and maybe a bit weak. And probably just a little bit terrifying given that his teeth were the size of her head (at a minimum) right now.

Sorry about that, Pinks. Just... You OK?

Peachy! Gosh you're HUGE right now. Wanna switch places, big-big guy?

Take your breather. You've definitely earned it.

Spike let the Dragon's Hoard scale down as he began the final assault. First came a crushing blow with Grasp at his full size, shattering every single plate of armor on the Bermite King in a series of cracks and snaps. Earthshaper, Dragon's Claws, and the difference in size turned that armor into so much powder, after which he threw the King back down to earth. It hadn't sat there and taken the hit gladly: If he weren't The Gamer his claws would be turned into mincemeat right now. It still hurt.

As Spike began to shrink and condense down he settled into the motions of his Disciplined combat as he understood it. He shot out a claw to Slice at one of the creatures and then brought it back to Draw across their flesh in an instant. Hit their limbs instead of their body, turning their attacks into misses while still inflicting harm. Dodge with the motions of his attacks, rather than pulling back to retreat to safety. Sure he'd take some more hits that way, but he could afford it.

The Bermites could not: He was wearing them both ragged even as he got closer to his usual size. When he started to lose the advantages in size and leverage, he leaned into speed. First he would Pierce their bodies with his claws before digging in to Grasp... No longer aiming to pull away just chunks of meat, but tearing off entire layers of protective chitin.

The whole time he put minimal effort into defense, relying on a few factors to make up for it. First and second were the benefits of his Discipline. In the text it had been clear that his defensive skills and resists would scale up as his health got lower. But unlisted in the text was the real perk: His Disciplined attacks lost their old downsides from being ‘held in abeyance’. No more huge risk of getting interrupted, far greater raw power, and the costs were both consistent and reasonable.

But the real factor Spike focused on was the simple fact that he's The Gamer.

Eventually he stood at his normal height, and while his enemies were significantly larger, he looked completely unharmed as they were teetering on the brink. Sure, behind his Gamer's Body he was actually way under 15% of his max health. But they couldn't know that. For intelligent creatures, morale played a huge role in battle and warfare. For creatures that weren't even able to guess how he could be doing this? It became an even bigger concern. If there had been any hive left to mind, he had to imagine the other Bermites would be fleeing right now.

All that was left now was the ending. Pinkie Pie was probably the healthiest entity in the room and she'd taken a few bad beats while buying him time. Spike was second from the top, and he was in bad shape under his perfect aesthetic. The Bermites... Well, this battle had started with a display of spite. He could oblige that and return it.

"I used magic to finish the Glittershell, both because I needed it and because, in retrospect? It deserved that. You don't. And Pinkie's quote earlier was right: There is cleansing in the flame."

You glimpsed something...
Cantus has gained a level!

Spike roared again, a smaller sound coming from a smaller body... But this time the rippling wave of his anger came alive with endless fire, blasting out in the largest wave he'd ever even tried to make. The size was one thing, but the heat also scaled up faster and higher than ever before. Dusty red rose into a brighter cherry, into comfortable orange and further still. He ran out of mana just as the core began to shift white, so when the smoke cleared (and dang was there ever a lot of smoke)...

Suffice it to say the battle was over.

This solution was something else he'd figured out with the basic roots of his Discipline:
Sometimes the correct answer is just overwhelming firepower.


Enemies slain! You gained 33,333 experience!

Congratulations on slaying all the major insect leaders in the region!
Your [Neophyte Insect Slayer] title has been improved to [Intermediate Insect Slayer].

Loot is being generated for the party. Luck checks successful! Loot improved.


Pinkie Pie trotted over and wrapped her hooves around his shoulders from behind. He leaned back and just focused on being present for a while, eventually kissing the bottom of her chin with a sigh.

"Thanks a lot, Pinkie. I'm sorry I couldn't get back into it faster. You got hurt..."

"Meh! I've had worse. More important: You were awesome!"

He didn't actually know if that was more important, or important at all. But it made her smile so he smiled right back, ignoring the ache in his jaw. They spent time decompressing like that for a few minutes, delaying the looting and return trip. It was nice after everything to just be able to relax...

"Victory cupcake?"

Spike blinked suspiciously at the proffered treat on her hoof. The more he used his own Inventory the more he wondered just how much he and Pinkie had in common... But he wasn't exactly one to turn down a treat. Pinkie Pie pulled out her own frosted reward and 'clinked' it against his in a mock toast, smooshing the pink and green icings together.

"To victory!"

"To victory."

Her baking was just as good as always: Fresh and light, sweet without being cloying, bright flavors that didn't overpower the soft cake, a resonant thrum of healing energy...

No. Wait. That last part wasn't normal. From the look on Pinkie Pie's face it wasn't expected for her... And from the fact that her bruised forelimbs were visibly returning to normal in front of his eyes, it wasn't just a Gamer thing either.

A new recipe has been discovered by serendipity and synchronicity!

Victory Cupcakes: Heal 30% of injuries remaining after a successful combat encounter.

"...WELP. That happened."

He kissed her again, making sure to snake his tongue up to catch a bit of icing off her cheek.
"I like how, even when we're both used to being kinda weird compared to everypony around us? When we get together it's bad enough that we can still surprise each other."

She retaliated against Spike's icing theft by leaning down to vworp the remainder of his cupcake (wrapper and all) into her own mouth. He couldn't make out what she said afterwards, but it probably had something to do with the loot since she broke out of their embrace to go check the remains.

Pinkie Pie picked up a few objects off of the floor, looking them over with brief curiosity before shrugging and coming back towards Spike. He waved and went to meet her in the middle when something in the distance froze him solid. The wall behind Pinkie Pie, the far end of the chamber where the Bermite Queen and King had been waiting... The wall was beginning to slide apart.

Rocks dropped and glided noiselessly, rising into the ceiling and retracting into the walls until a huge passage formed. Two enormous green eyes glinted in the distance, literally glowing. The dim glow illuminated the edges of a terrible insectile face, and around that? A huge mane of wiry golden hair. Pinkie Pie saw his shocked expression and turned to look herself... Her exaggerated GASP! of shock and surprise was combo'd with a backwards jump: Normally something she did for extra comedic effect, but this time it served a double purpose, carrying her all the way back to his side.

The creature strode out, not entirely breaking from the darkness but drawing close enough for Spike to make out the nameplate over its head. It was... not encouraging.

[??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ???]
The Antlion
LV ???

Spike's own roar from earlier had been something he felt was pretty impressive. Respectable, even! Sure he was riding a bit of a berserker high at the time. But it was cathartic and properly loud, like a roar really should be. Now he heard this creature roar and all pretense of power vanished from him.

The sound was so deafening that it nearly physically bowled him backwards, the tenor so deep he could feel it in bones he didn't even know he had. As the monster's wild mane shook from the sheer force of its own scream, Spike watched as the walls began to draw in again... Not just around the gap where it had broken into the chamber, but all around them: The entire place was sealing shut.

He had to imagine Pinkie Pie's ears were still ringing like his, so he switched back to subvocals.

"Yeah this is a problem."

"I might not be Rainbow Dash, but I think I know a Daring Do escape sequence when I see it."

"Run?"

"Yes please."

So they left the chambers beneath the Diamond Dog escape tunnel, barreling full-tilt out of the path of rolling rocks and collapsing stones. Spike spared a glance behind him at one point and caught a final glimpse of the terrible figure in the distance... He couldn't actually see its maw in the darkness, but it somehow seemed to be smirking at him.


A skill has been created through a special action! By witnessing the peak of transformative power, the skill [Alter] has been created!


By the time they slowed down the nest was gone like it had never existed.

Author's Note:

Chapter 114
One if By Land: Part 7
- OR -
Boss Battle Burnout

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