Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06 and MixMassBasher
The One Where Pinkie Pie Knows
Dear Scootaloo,
So, caught you with that baby balloon bottle and I was wondering if you want to try out some baby fetishes I always wanted to try. I am an expecting mother, after all.
Overbearing,
Princess Cadance
Dear Fax Machine,
I know it was you who burned my comic. That was a rare one! Pay up.
Angrily,
Shining Armor
Dear Shining Armor,
I was HELPING! Do you want to get sucked into that Sailor Moon comic I burnt? No thank you!
Disgusted,
Spike
Dear Pinkie Pie Princess Unikitty,
Where have you been? Us master builders need to assemble.
In Need of Assistance,
Emmet Brickowski
Dear Shining Armor,
Thanks for the surprise at the party. Now, how about you come into my bedroom for my buried treasure.
Horny,
Twilight
Dear Granny Smith,
Now why in the hay did Mom and Dad take THAT photo. Twilight is for sure blackmailing this.
Depressed,
Applejack
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
Don't worry. There'll be more surprises to come.
Sincerely,
Starlight Glimmer
Dear Shining Armor,
My bed or yours? Tonight. Pick one. Or there won't even be ashes left of the rest of your comics.
No way you and that knocked-up bitch are leaving me high and dry. I'm gonna have your foal, too.
Love, your irresistible sister,
Twilight
P.S. Hehe, you could say I'm "irresisterble."
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CORNER. NOW.
I feel like "baby bottle balloon" would make more sense...
6638698 Corner? No
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MOON. NOW.
6638737
Even better.
Dear Pinkie Pie,
I couldn't help but notice that you specialize in Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Ponies.
Due to a shipping error, I myself am currently overstocked on Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Men, and I want to pass them all off to YOU!
Sincerely,
Al Harrington
President and CEO
Al Harrington's Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Men Imporium and Warehouse
It's gonna be like "Pattycakes" all over again isn't it? Run, Scootaloo, run!
Mr. Cake had canonical sex?
Sure, whatever helps you sleep better at night, Mr. Earth-Pony-With-A-Pegasus-And-A-Unicorn-Foal.
... I'd kinda like to be sucked into a Sailor Moon comic.
I almost typed "sucked in", but then things would've taken a sharp left turn.
retecool.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/picard-facepalm.gif
No. Bad.
"irresisterble"
You're spending WAY too much time around Pinkie, Twilight Sparkle.
6638891
If he hadn't, then the odds that Pound and Pumpkin are his go from "very low" to "I'm getting a divorce, you cheating nag.".
OMG thanks for the credit!!!!
Dear Fax Machine,
No, that was Action Comics #1. The only reason I don't own your scaly ass now is because someone has to keep the walking libido that calls itself my sister from hitting all of Ponyville with a wide-angle Want-It Need-It. Again.
Vengefully,
Shining Armor
Hey Spike! How about a nice game of YOU MUST DIE!
Dear Ponyville,
You suck!
Canterlot
"Take".
Dear Shining Armor,
Please think twice before declining Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle's offer of crazy, mind-blowing coitus. I realize she is your sister, however, she is my Mistress, and you would be doing me a huge favor if you plowed her incognizant. Pound her so hard she loses control of all her cognitive facilities for at least one night. Ream her into a babbling, dazed, incoherent mess so that I can sleep without interruption for one night. Come on, man, be a bro. Piledrive your sister into oblivion for me.
Signed Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle's loyal, yet so very tired, slave,
Neko Majin C.
Is this good enough, Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle?
Dumbass, you know nothing you ever do is good enough.
Forgive me, I misspoke. Do you think he will buy it?
I suppose you'll find out if you get a full night's sleep.
~KBO.
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6638941
albaquerki has way too many erotic bakeries for you to make that joke
Dear Featherweight,
What the hell kind of 8-year-old says "royal pain?" Try talking normal, and you might get lines in more episodes.
-Pinkie Pie
I think she belongs on a Watch List somewhere now.
It was actually the least cute picture they could find out of four dozens rolls of film.
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
You already are an aunt. I would love to let you meet your niece Pharmona, just get that cunt Cadance to stop blackmailing me.
I would also get to see the only stallion I ever loved again too. Sincerely, Queen Chrysalis.
*There'll
(Congratulations BTW. I think this is the first time I spot a spelling mistake in this. That's quite rare...)
6638698 best pun
6638891
Eh. If it had just been a unicorn or a pegasus child, that would have been quite suspicious. But since it's both, we can see for sure that some generation-skipping is going on.
I really wish it was possible to vote on individual chapters. Actually, that would help the authors too. It would make it easier to understand which parts of the story most people liked and which parts they didn't.