So, when it starts, it starts with the whispers. When a 'special' person or place shows up, the rumors start spreading. Eventually, the picture gets clearer and soon, you have people from all over the place showing up. Some just to see it, some to try and take a piece for themselves. Such is the way in each universe, each dimension; if you build it, or more precisely when you find it, they will come. Like a 'gold rush' phase. The type of 'gold' may change, but the rush is usually the same.
She knew they would come for this place eventually, and so she put as much distance between us and them as she was able. She put doors in place, and made it so we would find them first, so that we would be ready when they come. It did not matter who came first, the righteous or the indignant, the helpful, the hopeless or the hungry, the saint, the sinner, the savage or the shadows that circle in between. Even those who came simply to learn would be treated as the thief; no matter how noble, it would be not their intent that matters. For no matter the intent, the result could be, would only be the same.
The whispers have begun. We hear them even if you do not. We have a duty to protect what is ours, what remains ours, what will always be ours. It's more valuable than you know, more valuable than gold. And they are coming for it. For you. Do not fear our return, my daughters.
Pray that we are not too late.
When Dan woke up, he didn't realize he'd woken up at first. Until he looked up and saw stars. Everything around him, however, was completely pitch black. He couldn't get his bearings because it was just impossible for him to see; the only light was in space or too dim to illuminate anything. Bio-luminescent life, glowing mushrooms and moss were the only light sources along with the occasional firefly. Everything else was dark.
"He-hello? HEY!" Dan shouted. And the shouting rustled the trees, caused sleeping animals to stir all around him. The very sound of his voice awakened a roar of creatures rustling. The night stirred for several long seconds with the growls, howls and chitters of unseen fauna until finally, they were quiet yet again.
Dan nearly soiled himself.
"Okay... don't panic. Survival instincts, kick in!" His survival instincts were not as quick to kick in as he would've hoped. "It's alright, Dan, you've drilled for this. I've drilled everyone I know with intense survival lessons for months on end. But why didn't I take any MYSELF?!"
"*Krrraaa! Krrraaa!!*"
"Okay... okay, can't talk too loud because... of things. In the dark. With teeth." He looked around, which didn't help. Turned in a full circle, still not helpful. Pitch dark, Dan was not able to see his hand in front of his own face. He took a careful step forward, having to take extra care because his limbs were shaking that much. Not only was it cold, but he was terrified. Which made it seem colder.
"Okay Dan," he said, beginning his third attempt starting with "Okay" in the effort it would actually be true. It wasn't. "You've been in these situations before. You hear me, Zeal? Are you listening? This isn't the first time someone's kidnapped me and dumped me in the woods!"
"*Krraaa!*"
"S-s-so it is d-darker than it was last time. I could still see the last time I was ditched in the forest. But I'm not naked this time, so that's a plus. I could be naked, though."
Dan, this is the narrator.
"Richard Dreyfuss?"
No, he's just the voice of Fluffle's inner dialogue. I'm new. Started after Episode 19. Anyway, I'm going to have to ask you not to take your clothes off.
"That's oddly specific. I mean, it's pitch black out here. Not like anyone would see-"
Dan, no. You don't have to do this. You don't have to take your clothes off, at least not this time.
"Oh no?"
Even though it seems like you're completely blind, it's gonna be fine.
"Uh huh."
We don't have to take ou-
"Please stop now."
Okay. Dan headed for the only lights he could see. Wasn't quite sure what they were, and soon found several tree roots that he stumbled over. Unable to see, he felt several vines dangling from the tree, some of the wet. He pushed his way through the fines, trying to make his way around the tree. He crept, feet pressing into the soft ground between the tree roots, pushing the vines out of his way, until they got thicker and thicker.
Suddenly, Dan felt his arms roped around the vines. He struggled, but they pulled tight, and then lifted him upward.
*"Kikikikikikrrrrrrrr*"
"AAAAHH! HELP! HEEELLLP!!"
A large, branch-like thing, striped down its sides, not that Dan would see, pulled him upward using its limbs. Splits appeared down its body, opening up to reveal a maw full of tiny, serrated teeth.
"AAAAAAAAAHHH!!" Dan flailed, but his limbs were pulled tight. The creature continued pulling him upward into its waiting maw, hungry for a warm snack. Then, abruptly, its vine-like limbs went slack.
Dan fell to the ground. The vine-tentacles released him.
"What? What the hell was that?"
"Equestrians call them canopy anglers." Zen Zeal appeared out of the darkness, a lantern hanging from his spear. Two zebras flanked him. "It would've eaten you easily. One minute, forty-three seconds." The general turned away and walked back into the darkness.
"What?" Dan asked. "That thing was gonna eat me? What in the hell do you mean a minute and-"
"Again."
Dan felt something prick his neck, realized this time it was a dart before falling unconscious.
When Dan woke up, he didn't realize he'd woken u-
"You said that already!" Dan shouted. The noise stirred the forest, causing the limbs of trees to wave like that'd been hit by storm winds. He quieted himself quickly this time. He looked around, trying again to get his bearings but there were none to get.
"Okay, what gives? What the hell kinda training is this?"
"*Awooooooooo~*"
"Hello? Zeal? Is that you?"
"*ha...ha...ha...*"
"I'm getting pretty damn tired of this! If this is your idea of training, then you need your heads examined, because they're so far up your own-"
A massive wooden paw slammed against Dan's chest. Instantly, he was face to face with the mighty Timberwolf. Fiercely territorial and deadly, they were known to prey on unsuspecting travelers in the Everfree. They hunted in packs, but this one was young, alone and had just woken up. Its green eyes illuminated a bit of the night as they peered at Dan.
"N-n-nice wolfie. Nice boy."
"*Rrrrrrrrrrrr...*" The wooden wolf did not take kindly to being rudely awoken. "*Awwooo*?" But then, the creature fell over. Dan quickly pulled himself up.
"Adolescent timberwolf. Probably wouldn't have eaten you, but would've slashed you to pieces to prove a point," Zeal said. Again, he had appeared out of nowhere. Again.
"What the hell are you doing, Zeal? Where the hell did you even come from? It's you that keeps doing this, isn't it? Where's Twilight?"
Zeal regarded him with the same cold, iron stare he always had. "Eighteen seconds."
Dan shook his fist at the zebra, nearly foaming, but then he thought. "Eighteen seconds until what? Wait... did you mean-"
"Again."
Dan felt a dart hit his neck, then felt his body go numb again.
When Dan woke up this time, he didn't say anything. He looked around, breathing heavy, he made his way towards a tree. He avoided the vines, staying just close enough to the tree that he could feel the edges of the roots indenting the ground beneath. His steps were nearly silent.
He didn't know exactly where he was going, but he followed the trees from bigger to smaller, making his way out of the denser part of the forest. The older the tree, the larger and more spread out it was, so he moved towards the smaller trees, avoiding the vines and anything that lit up. He nearly bumped into several sleeping creatures, possibly timberwolves. He smelled something sweet, a nectar that was almost haunting, begging him to come in search for it, but he avoided it. A good decision, as there were several bugbears that would have had a problem if he'd come close to where they got their honey.
Dan made his way out of the forest without even the use of his eyes. Eventually, the light from the sky, the moon in particular, reached the ground. He was out from under the forest canopy at last.
"HA! HahahaHA! I did it!" Dan celebrated, but the rustling of the trees quickly reminded him it was not the time to be loud, or to make any noise at all. So he whispered, "I did it, sucker! I won!"
Dan took a step forward and fell into the river.
"AAAAHHH! HELP! HELP!!" The current quickly grabbed him and carried him with it. He felt something hard.
"Excuse me, would you mind keeping it down?" A serpent with a grass mustache asked.
"AAAAAAAAAHHHAAAAAAAA!"
The serpent shook his head. "That's not what I meant."
"Fourteen minutes!" Zen shouted from the opposite bank of the river.
"Ye-yeah!!" Dan yelled. "I'm getting better at this, aren't I?"
"Again!"
"NO, wait just a-" Dan held out his hand to stop Zeal, and that's where he felt the dart. Right in the palm. "Ohh you son of a biiii..." He passed out.
The serpent moved Dan along the length of his body, picked him with his tail and then handed him to Zeal. "I believe this is yours."
"Thank you. Your assistance is appreciated."
"Quite welcome. Do tell Rarity I said hello."
"Of course. Good night."
"Farewell."
By the twenty-seventh time Dan woke up in the middle of the Everfree Forest, he was ready. He knew every animal and the noises it made, he knew the dangers that lurked and the obstacles in front of him, where every pitfall and predator was, including the Predator from the movie Predator. Yeah, one of those was in there, too. His name's Dave and he doesn't really like visitors.
Dan was silent and swift. He trusted his ears and his skin more than his eyes. He was able to smell the river and hear the running water before he saw it. After multiple attempts of trying and failing, being caught in various traps and by various creatures, Dan finally was an expert at navigating the Everfree at night. Eventually, he made it back to Zecora's hut and from there, back to Ponyville.
When he emerged from the treeline, his friends were waiting for him.
"Dan!"
"There he is! That's our guy."
Chrys, Phoenix, Twilight and Spike ran up to embrace him. He was covered in sweat and muck, he had a beard for some reason and he was wearing a skirt made of leaves that might've been poisonous. Damn it, I told him he didn't need to take his clothes off. And he does it anyway. I don't get paid enough for this job.
"Oh shut the hell up. Hi, guys!"
"Dan, you finally made it out!"
"Great job, Dan," Phoenix said. "Mmm, this is good."
Dan hugged them all, despite the sweat and stench clinging to him. He definitely smelled like the Everfree Forest.
"We were worried at first, but I had faith you'd make it out. Eventually," Chrys said.
"You showed incredible tenacity and resourcefulness, Dan. And you learned quickly," Twilight remarked. "Thinkin' on your feet, as always."
Dan pulled back, smiling. "You guys saw all that? Yeah, didn't take me that long, did it?"
"Nnnope!" Phoenix said, taking another bite.
"Wait, what are you guys eating?"
"Gelato!" Phoenix said. "I got lemon. Didn't even know there was a gelato place in town."
Dan pushed them aside. Every part of his dirt-caked body ached. "You're eating Italian iced delicacies... WITHOUT ME? DURING what's supposed to be MUTUAL training?"
Phoenix, Spike and Chrys nodded, still eating. "Yup."
"Did... did you get me any??"
"Sorry, Dan. We didn't know how long you were gonna be in the forest," Twilight said.
"I had five bits on two days at least," Spike added.
"Gaderlbrrrerrawwgava!" Dan made... some kind of angry noise and stomped his way past his friends, over to where Zeal stood. Again, he was flanked by his zebras, but this time, their spears were stuck firmly in the ground as they were using their hooves to eat gelato.
"You." Best way to start a conversation. "You," Dan said, "I beat your jungle obstacle course. And I get why you're doing this, right? Teach me how to use other senses, get the lay of the land and perceive dangers without using my eyesight. Very effective. And you could've accomplished the SAME EFFECT by just tossing me in a broom closet and turning out the lights!!"
"Indeed. More effective this way," Zeal said between bites of gelato. "Your final time was forty-nine minutes. Very impressive."
Dan nodded, grinning with snide pride. "Yes, yes, I'm awesome- wait, did you just complement me?"
"Of course," Zeal said. "Congratulations on making it through the forest, Dan. You've won. Again."
"Well, thank you, now can I ge- wait, did you mean I've won again or-" And then the dart hit him in the back of the neck. "I hate you so muuuuuuuuuuuu..." He passed out. Two zebras picked Dan up by his shoulders and carried him back into the forest.
"Further back this time," Zeal instructed. He turned and walked back to Ponyville. The others slowly turned to join him.
Twilight trotted up to Zeal. "So, um, I have a couple of questions about Dan's... 'training.'"
"Ask."
"Well, he made it through the forest. At night," Twilight said. "Isn't that enough? What more do you expect him to do?"
"Improve," Zeal said. "I expect him to reach the edge faster. He has attained the basic skills, knowledge and experience required to complete the course. Now, they must be sharpened."
"Okay..." Twilight said. She didn't fully understand. "Why does our training involve gelato?"
"It doesn't," Zeal said. "That was to annoy Dan."
"Ah. I thought that's what that was about."
"Will Dan being annoyed improve his senses or something?" Spike asked.
"No. I wanted to annoy Dan and I like gelato."
"What, so we just wait for him again?" Phoenix asked.
"Yes. Again."
"Oka- wait." And Phoenix, Chrys, Spike and Twilight were all hit with darts and knocked unconscious. Zen went back to Ponyville to get gelato. Again.
Only 27 times? Im seriously impressed.
As for less than an hour, Id have been sat there trying to work out what was going on and most likely on realising its a forest, digging myself into the ground to see if it was any better during the day.
I disagree, Dan being annoyed will definitely affect improve his determination if nothing else.
I love this chapter.
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It loves you back. Really enjoyed writing this one. True to form, Dan completed it in an above average amount of time. He's an impressive specimen and very formidable when you get right down to it. Not to brag too much, but I wanted this chapter to be fun to read. Again and Again!
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Sometimes yes, sometimes no. If he doesn't have an outlet for his anger, it begins to consume him like in the previous episode. This time, however, Zeal just wanted to piss off Dan. He considers this a way of getting back at Dan for beating him in Episode 15.
10807007
Indeed, it is impressive. And the Everfree is a dangerous place, too. More training for him next time!
Hello good author, I hope this week has only been kind to you. So with that in mind: a new chapter means it’s ~Sunday~ now let me see n’ere *dons reading glasses*
Ah. Lost in the woods, no gear, no provisions ... though Dan can easily kill something if need be, he ain’t fussy! Seriously the multiple dartings are reminding me of “The Island”!
Question: if Dan gets darted so many times will he become immune to it? Or at the least resistant? Becauze mentioned in “Dan Vs. Baseball” (TV episode) that he’s been tear-gassed so many times he doesn’t even notice anymore!
Thanks for another awesome chapter and I’ll eagerly await the next!
Awesome as always and I’ll see you ~next time~
Your Eternal Fan ^_^
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Ah, I see.
10808531
Possibly. But the zebra potions may work differently, so he may not develop an immunity to it. And thank you as always, my dearest eternal fan. Feeling better lately so hope that keeps up.
Hey Barrobroadcaster, I was wondering if/when you are going to do Dan vs. Equestria Girls: Rainbow Rocks?
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Wait, seriously? ...Well crap. Meh, even so, they allowed themselves to become slaves, so I'm embarrassed that they even exist. I believe-and pray I'm right-that humanity is too proud to ever willingly choose slavery.
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Episode 12 is an homage to a Star Trek Enterprise episode of a similar name. It even follows a similar storyline. I hadn't originally planned to introduce a mirror universe to my story until season 2 but there was a LOT I didn't plan on.
Originally, the story was going to have more slice-of-life elements but still have an overarcing adventure narrative. The Director was originally Discord playing an elaborate prank on Dan and also, I hadn't planned on introducing ANY original characters aside from Fluffle Puff. Things changed and I realized after Episode 3 that... I couldn't keep things going without adding my own stuff. Now, I've found an appropriate place for the story to go, and the ending will be very, very fitting. Season 0 will be more traditional.
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So there will be a Rainbow Rocks part at some point, even if not this season? HOORAY!!!
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Look, I'm not gonna lie to you, there does need to be some rewrites in a lot of places. There's episodes I'm happy with and a lot I think could be done better in others. The first few episodes don't need much editing other than a touch-up or two. The longer ones, I feel could do with a rewrite or two but the basic over-arcing narrative is there. And there's a little bit of a message at the end of each.
This thing's at a million words and it's just me writing it when I don't have work. Updating it every week. Without an editor. My own choice, but still, not an easy task. I appreciate even a single view so thank you so much for just giving the story a chance. Hope you continue to find some enjoyment from it, but there's some rough stuff ahead.
10814739
They found something. They went searching for their mother, the Fausticorn and out there in the stars, they found something. We don't know what they found. We only know that at some point, they stopped looking. Too late did they, did we all realize something terrible: they lost something in their search. And it may be too late to get it back.
Now, they're looking at us.
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Yeah, but with Grogar being the father of all monsters, how was Tirek the first true villain Equestria had ever faced? ...Wait a second, wasn't Grogar around before Equestria was Equestria-just a collection of islands? So does that mean that he was around before the King and Queen of Equestria were around in this story?
10815698
Well, it's a cartoon so, body types and sizes don't really change that much. Also, Equestria(at least this version) actively keeps its denizens in their prime. That's a property of its natural magic.
So, Dan Vs. the Seaponies was originally going to involve a surf contest. Then the story itself went off the deep end, pun only slightly intended. But it rebounded and I'm happy with the current direction. Also, you may notice something about Episode 18 when you get to it.
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Yes, this version of Tirek and Grogar were in fact around before the King and Queen were created by the Fausticorn. This is one of the ways I'm tying in the lore of the other generations; this universe was (allegedly)created by the Fausticorn, the suspected avatar of Lauren Faust(or is it?) but some elements weren't so much as created as they were re-created. How would they reconcile themselves in this universe? But then, this isn't even the same universe as FIM because Dan and Fluffle are in it and Chrys isn't a villain.
You'll have to keep in mind that the story isn't over yet. I have to keep some things up my sleeve. And there's quite a few things up there, indeed. The answers, however, have been right in front of you the whole time.
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Oh okay, cool. That actually explains a lot. Thanks.
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Okay, thanks. Ah, the answers are right in front of me? That makes me even more excited about reading this story.
10815866
However, it could still be the same universe as FiM, just with the addition of Dan, Flufflepuff, and the alteration of having Chrysalis be on the ponies' side while having another villain to replace Chrysalis in the episodes. Like one of Starlight's alternate timelines, but with most of it still following the same storyline rather than it not coming back from any deviations or any in between time after veering off. This could still be made to follow the original timeline of FiM (for the most part), with this season just being something akin to what happens in between season 3 and 4 of MLP: FiM. Like I said, just find or create another villain to replace Chrysalis, or even add a Chrysalis from another universe in Dan's Chrysalis's place, and you're good to go.
Also:
So basically the equivalent of, unlike "Demon" Sunset, an actual demon. One that can be incorporeal and still rip someone's heart out with its incorporeal...hand...appendage as though it were corporeal.
It gets it right or it gets the hose again!