Dan Vs. The Magic of Friendship(Season 1)

by Barrobroadcaster

Resort: Elemental Theory

Castle of The Two Sisters
15 minutes ago

The Castle of The Two Sisters, or just the Castle of Two, had been gutted for well over a thousand years now. Like most of Equestria's other castles, it had been divided into eight sections- one for each Element of Harmony and two wings flanking the core representing the sun and moon. The entrance represented laughter, the courtyard in the back of the castle was kindness, the living quarters were generosity, the kitchen and dining hall were honesty and the armory and barracks held loyalty. Magic was represented by the grand hall and connecting corridors, as well as the library in the upper chambers and the observatory on top.

The two wings and a few adjoining chambers were all that remained and even those, only just. The grand hall, throne room, entrance and upper levels of the castle had all been obliterated with just the stony corners remaining. Grass and other flora grew freely through the long-ruined floors with a sturdy new tree providing canopy in place of the ceiling in one corner. The tattered remains of tapestries and banners, all that remained of the magic in the past millennium, spoke of the faded glory of the once-proud castle.

"Remarkable," Tuxley said. "Reginald?"

"Yes sir?"

"We must document everything. Get samples, take pictures- we may need to make a few trips," the dinosaur started, almost salivating. He then noticed Twilight noticing him. "With her highness's permission, of course."

"It's fine, Tuxley. Might as well save what we can." She sighed. Spike knew the reason why.

"What's wrong, Twilight?" He asked anyway. She was slow to answer. "You're... wondering if we'll be doing the same to Canterlot."

"Hoping we'll be lucky enough to, to be honest," Twilight replied. Losing the heart of the kingdom was quite a blow. Tougher was the fact that there were less remains of Canterlot than the castle they were standing in right now. Still, it had been worth it. If Rice had abducted the town or gained access to some of the things inside Canterlot, it was likely he would have used them to terrorize the rest of Equestria or even made his way to Earth.

Canterlot Castle held many secrets, most of which were now stored in Gust's ring-shaped airships in Raiders of The Lost Ark-style boxes. Every castle in Equestria had dozens of secrets, even the abandoned ones. Powerful spells kept whatever was hidden in place, the exception being the Castle of Two which had been destroyed by a powerful spell and all within it destroyed. Or so Twilight thought.

"Bring any books to me that you find," Twilight instructed Tux and Reginald. "Even if they're ruined, even if there are pages missing, even pages you find lying around, gather anything important you find."

"We most certainly shall, your highness," the pair bowed.

"And don't think I haven't noticed you establishing yet another British colony on the lawn."

Tuxley and Reginald sulked. Being Brits, founding colonies was what they did. Travel to a place, set up a colony, establish trade, build civilization, grow empire, it was natural to them. It's in their blood, the same way establishing a Lawl-Mart with a Burgerphile inside it is natural to Americans. Yeah you might think that sounds offensive but try going somewhere where the temperature is 100+ in the daytime and tell me you wouldn't kill for air conditioning and a cheeseburger.

"It's just a little colony, your highness. I highly doubt anyone would even notice it wasn't here the whole time," Tuxley said.

"No buts. No more colonizing without my permission beforehand. Understand?"

"Yes, ma'am," the two bowed again.

"Would this be a bad time to mention we've already built a new Tesco?"

"Later, Reginald, later," Tux said.

Twilight and Spike traveled together through the ruined courtyard to the keep in the castle's rear to the north. The Chamber of the Elements was kept the castle's keep, the walls surrounding it more intact than the other walls. In Equestria, the keep of each castle was usually not used as a residence but more for the storage of important things. The only exception was Trottingham Palace, which was actually based on Windsor Castle and not Buckingham Palace.

Rainbow Dash and Daring Do were busy examining the fountain in the center of the courtyard. Covered in vines and grass growing through the base, it was nevertheless a piece of architecture that could speak volumes to the enlightened eye like Daring. Rainbow had to be careful when clearing some of the weeds as not to cause further damage to the structure, but Daring didn't have to remind her of that. They were all acting with a little more restraint.

The castle keep and the Chamber of the Elements itself, remained in their half-destroyed state. The ceiling was gone and only the remains of the columns, the window frames and door remained intact.

"What are we looking for, Twilight?"

"Something missing or out of place," Twilight said, determined. "Vice is using an elemental summoning spell to power himself with magic from a source outside of Equestria. Like the Elements of Harmony, but using an element that's not from Equestria itself."

"Not from this Equestria, at least," Spike added.

"Mm-hmm. The key to stopping him might be in blocking his element from the source, the same way we did with Zen Zeal. We block the magic, we stop the spell and then he won't be invincible any more," Twilight said, still determined. And then she added, "Hopefully."

They opened the door slowly. The wood let out a long, eerie, creak, almost a warning in itself.

"Quite an interesting theory," Rice said. He stood in the center of the room with his back turned to them. "Care to test it?"

"Vice Grip!!" Twilight yelled, instinctively putting up a shield around her and Spike. Before she could do anything else, one of the columns smashed into her shield and batted her and Spike into one of the walls. It was almost surprising the wall itself didn't crack from the force of them slamming into it.

"Predictable," Rice said, the word a harsh criticism and an insult rolled into one. Another column smashed them back into the other, which in turn hit it back. Spike and Twilight were dazed as the two stone pillars batted them back and forth across the room, which from an overhead shot looked exactly like a game of Pong. It even made the same sound effects.

Finally, just when Twilight felt she couldn't take it any more, one of the columns got underneath them and lifted them up like a ball on a tee-ball stand. Rice hovered up to their level.

"Twilight, Twilight, Twilight... you always were the smart one in my class. Smartest even. A prodigy in your own right... just like me," Rice said. The sandy-gold colored pony clasped his metal hands behind his back like he did. "But you always were just a little bit too naive. You never learned to predict your opponents. Always trying to make friends with them. Even as a filly."

"Do you EVER get tired of hearing yourself talk?!" Spike yelled.

Rice shrugged. "I enjoy hearing intelligent conversation, so there's really no one else to listen to."

"There's Twilight!"

Rice grinned. "I know."

Twilight held her head with both hooves. The sound of a tin can falling down the stairs echoed through her skull. "Spike... I have a concussion and he's already calling us stupid. Please don't help him."

"Sorry, Twilight. Wait, what do you mean "help him?""

"Look... whoever you are, it doesn't even matter what you do to us. There is no way you're going to get what you want out of this," Twilight declared. "You will never destroy Earth and nopony will ever listen to you so long as you're threatening our friends. Whatever society you want to build, it won't be with our help."

Rice raised an eyebrow. The second column rose up high and positioned itself over them. "Care to test that theory?"

Dan and Phoenix crashed through the door in the tank.

Comments

[Dustchu]

"Twilight, Twilight, Twilight... you always were the smart one in my class. Smartest even. A prodigy in your own right... just like me,"
Color me a curious boy... I smell something fishy here...

Good show, as always.

[Booster Spice]

Now all Dan and Phoenix have to do is keep Rice distracted while Pinkie puts out the two bushes, short length of railroad track, and flashing crossing lights?

Or have they arelady tried that trick and Rice just has too much DJump to even be discomforted by it?

Theyre in a real problem if Rice is the R63 Evil Mirror Universe Twilight, because he has all her smarts and training, but also an awful lot of real world experience as well, and, the will and ability to actually use it, where Twilight is utterly crippled in wanting to avoid harm to others, even accidentally.

Id suspect thers a good chance that just reversing the polarity in the case would end up with the Tree and Anti Tree either getting ripped out of both realities, or dragging both realities together dimentionally, which would end up with every single atom in both universes trying to occupy the identical spot at the same time, leading to the instant total release of all energy of two universes.

Which is a Very Bad Thing.

My dear Tuxley. Tesco might be a UK store, but it is no way British. That, would be Marks And Spencer?.

[LadyLeomon]

A new chapter means it's ~Sunday~

My adding of a Pinkie Smile is in honour of my previous trouble seeming to be worked out, a few weeks of medication for my own Tanky will see if things resolve themselves perfectly. So reading this after hat good news really cheers me up! Now lemme see n'ere *dons reading glasses*

Ah Mr Tuxley and Mr Reginald, it seems like an eternity since I have enjoyed thy company-AGH BUCKERATIONS! HE'S BACK!!!

By the Fiction Gods does this guy ever get sick of his own voice?! At least Director Cleo isn't totally nuts despite her own troubles!

Now for my favourite quotes:
(TBC super soon Pinkie Promise)

And that's everything I loved (most) about this week's chapter!

You know what? Your chapters are the best way to end my week, if I'm having a bad week th they cheer me up and if I'm having a good one then this makes it even better! It's a double-edged blade (the good kind)! Like always thanks for making my weekend and I'll eagerly await the next installment.

Awesome as always and I'll see you ~next time~

Your Eternal Fan =^_^=

[Shardstar3]

9313149
Sounds like albert wesker

[Barrobroadcaster]

9315461
He is somewhat based on Wesker. And Dr. No and other villains.

[JakeAndDollars]

You know, I consider myself a fairly mild-tempered man, it takes a lot to get under my skin. But I'm really starting to dislike this guy...

Nobody beats up on my Twibright!

"My name is Twilight!"

That's what I said.

Awesome chapter as always!

~Dollars

[Barrobroadcaster]

9316483
To be fair, his son was allegedly murdered by the Equestrian Royal Family in an assassination attempt on his own life. They do seem to have a habit of burying their problems rather than facing them. Discord was left as a lawn ornament for a thousand years, Luna was locked up in her own Moonimum-security prison(I'm not sorry), there's all sorts of crap in Tartarus, Lightning Claw was probably going to be yet another prisoner, I mean holy shit. Celestia let her OWN SISTER be locked up for a millennium. That's apparently the only punishment in this universe- get swept under the rug.

If Luna was Dan's sister, he would have literally beaten Nightmare Moon out of her or found someone to beat it out of her. Or at the very least, he would have spent a thousand years trying to do so, because he's Dan, he would do that, that's the only logic there is with him. Dan does not take No or Maybe for an answer. He hits No until it turns into Yes- he's done that before. Literally.

[howard035]

I love Tux and Reggie following their instincts and establishing a mini colony on the lawn. At this point I just assume it's a tea-room with a flag above it.

[Barrobroadcaster]

9318254
It definitely starts out that way, maybe an overly-regal tent. Union Jack flying overhead. But they've already started building the Tesco, so it's only a matter of time before it becomes a proper colony.

[Warrior Kitten]

And all caught up once again. Feel like the story is getting less and less focused the more time passes; more and more random.

[Barrobroadcaster]

9319671
There's a lot of reasons for that. Part of it is me tying this story into my other ones. Also, taking about a month to design a Ponyville Rube Goldberg device was not easy... but also worth it.

Like I said, the original draft for this episode involved a a surf contest but... I decided that wasn't weird or crazy enough.

[Razzy]

Can't wait to see that smug smirk wiped off his face.