Wrath: What Bears Do On The Moon
The inside of the library had its own atmosphere still. Dan and the others were able to breath without Twilight and Rarity's magic bubbles, which was a welcome relief for the two mares. Projecting and maintaining magical spells over multiple subjects was a difficult prospect, and an exhausting one as well.
"Everybody, wipe your feet. Nicky and Chris, please pick up Stevie."
"Right."
Dan activated the security system's terminal next to the door. He keyed in a series of sophisticated commands.
"AS we suspected," Dan declared. "That bastard didn't even bother changing the settings. Just waited for us to show up and turned it on."
The stormtroopers filed in, ignoring Dan's order to wipe their feet on the mat first.
"HEY! I said wipe the feet! Get back out there!"
"Dan," Phoenix cautioned, "the Ursas."
"I'll reactivate the security system and throw you back outside, Spaceballs. Wipe. Your. Feet."
The stormtroopers stared at Dan. There were a little over forty of them, the better part of their platoon divided into four fireteams. With most of them still outside surrounding the library, the squad leaders now looked at Dan to see if he was joking. He wasn't.
"He's not bluffing. I'd just do what he says," Chris said.
Dan held a finger over the targeting system.
"Okay," was all the lead trooper said. It was all he needed to say. The troopers all wiped off their feet and entered the library, despite the danger of possibly being swiped at by a colossal space bear and the other risks of being in space.
"I don't about any of you fine fellows, but I have a question," Dollars said. He looked around and asked, "Where the hell is Vice Grip?"
"The library was just defending the moon. We still have to get inside the moonbase," Dan explained. He was still interfacing with the security system. "There's access tunnels that run across the moon's surface and connect to the complex deep beneath it. There's a lot of stuff stored there and most of it is dangerous."
"How did you..." Phoenix was about to ask Dan how he knew all this, but then the answer came to him as he asked it. "Luna."
Dan nodded. "That's right. Before Vice took it over, Luna used to take trips to the moon to meditate, relax, play video games."
"I thought her video games were in her room back in the castle," Phoenix said. (I wonder if she's played Ace Attorney.)
"Her PC and laptop sure, but she mostly plays on consoles and those are up here," Dan said.
Captain America finally woke up. "That... was painful."
"It was about two-million volts, give or take so just be happy your skin didn't incinerate," Dan replied.
The soldiers remained at the ready, but were getting idle. A few of them examined books and one turned on the television. Not exactly the best show of military discipline, but they were in a treehouse on the moon and outside was a group of giant space bears. Seeing all that they had survived to get there, they were afforded some lapse in regulation.
Jake and Dollars held one of their non-verbal conversations. Veterans of more campaigns against the Covenant, the Banished and the Sacred than they even cared to count, they were able to read each other through hand signals. That, and Jake hadn't spoken a word since their CO sacrificed herself for them during the Fall of Reach.
Eventually, Jake persuaded Dollars to ask Dan what the hell he was doing.
"Dan, what the hell are you doing?" Dollars was very to-the-point.
"Reconfiguring the targeting system. Sorry, it's gonna take me a minute."
"Why? Why are you bothering to do this when we're already inside the house?"
"HEY! This is a complicated process. It's not a lightswitch- this is a very sophisticated and advanced piece of equipment," Dan explained.
"The duck goes, 'waaack quaaaack quaaaaack.'"
"...Advanced piece of equipment. You sure it was made by Pone Depot and not Fischer-Price?"
"They... may have outsourced a few parts," Dan admitted.
"The donkey goes, "Hi, uh, my name is Sinbad. Hi. I used to be a stand-up comedian, kind-of an all-around performer and I do shows. I was in movies. Anyway, I'm available for parties, please hire me my number is eleven-"
The lights in the library flickered off. Then, back on again. The hum of power generators turning on filled the air before leveling out.
"Got it!" Dan announced.
"What'd you do?" Phoenix asked.
Around the outside of the library, the weapons retracted back into their bays. All the guns, missile launchers, cannons and blasters disappeared back into the treehouse itself, returning it to the way it normally looks, including the ion cannon on top. Then, speakers deployed in their place.
The melody of a pleasant lullaby deployed from the speakers. The ursas heard it, were confused at first, but then allowed themselves to be lulled by it into sleeping. The space bears, their bellies full of delicious honey, decided it was time to head for home and a long period of space hibernation, snuggling with their favorite asteroids and beds- except they were too lazy and just fell asleep on the lawn.
"HEY!" Dan yelled out the front door, "You're supposed to LEAVE now, not just fall asleep on the-"
"RAANNR!!" a bear swiped at Dan, prompting him to shut the door quickly. Do not argue with the space bears. Fortunately, the bear was too sleepy to accost Dan further and curled up, all cute and cuddly and went to sleep.
"If Fluttershy was here, she could help us with the bears," Phoenix remarked. And then, he and Dan and the others all realized at the same time, "Wait! Why don't we just go get her!"
"Great thinking, Nicky, she's here on the moon somewhere."
"How are we going to get to the moon base?" the storm trooper leader asked.
"Well, that's the problem. I... don't really know where the entrance is," Dan said. "We're going to call Barro and Papa Smurf back on the Star Disturber and have them use their scanners to find it." With that, Dan turned back to the terminal.
"Dan calling space dudes, come in."
"Hnnngghh... hzzzzzzzzzn... zzzzzzzzzzzz..."
Chris patted Dan on the back. "Great job, Dan. You put the author to sleep. Probably a first."
"I'm joking, Resident Emo. We're picking up that music on almost every frequency. Nice touch with the Ursas, though, Dan. We appreciate not being clawed at or eaten today."
"Yeah, well, day's not over yet. I need you and the Spaceballs to scan the surface of the moon to find us the entrance."
"Where exactly should we start?"
Dan shrugged, which was not visible to Barro. "I don't know! Just go over the whole moon until you find something! Comb the surface!"
"...Right, we'll get on that."
"Thank you," Dan said. And then thought for a moment, "And I mean with SCANNERS, okay?"
Phoenix patted Dan's shoulder. "Come on, Dan. It's not like they're going to use actual combs."
Stats
Page generated in 0.237 seconds
Total duration
1,132 users online
2,266,115 hits today, 2,814,898 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
We tried combing the surface like you told us.
And?
Combs got clogged with Hair Bear bunch.
That's a classic reference! I can't wait for them to escape one of Vice Grip's traps by sacrificing their stunt doubles.
Darn it I had hoped to swing by last night but I think I caught that lullaby that knocked out the sleuth of Ursas (yup, apparently a group of bears is called “a sleuth” , I was surprised too) so since I’m only a day over I’ll still say it:
(Belated) Happy Halloween to you Dear Barro and all my fellow Dansciples 🎃👻🎃
I hope your night was full of friendly/funny spooks, lotsa candy and zero zombies/zombie ponies! With that in mind:
A new chapter means it’s ~Sunday ~
now let me see n’ere *dons reading glasses*
Safe and sound (and uneaten) inside the Library/Homebase again, I’ve really missed the old girl! ... Uh hey, is the tree itself gonna be okay until they get it back down to Equestria? Also sheesh, how hard is it for Troopers to follow a simple order? This ain’t your base where you have droids to clean up after you so wipe your darn feet!
Dan and Barro’s Friendship Level just went up! Yays!
Now for my Favourite Quotes:
There’s only one Dark (Angry) Lord in this story, know your place Troopers, HAH!
Wait, so Luna kept her PC and Laptop in her room in the castle but her consoles are on the Moon? ... Honestly I’d have done the opposite so I could game in peace but I get why, other than Celestia who would really be able to bother her during a TF2 marathon? Now I kinda want a Lunar Game-Room for myself, just need an extra room for my kitties to chill out in while I game (and another one for my parrot) ... it looks so sweet in my head!
A hero’s face is their bread and butter so I’m glad Stevie’s wasn’t burnt!
Anyone else read this part and imagine some weird alternate version of RE where the infamous laser hallway happens while something stupid is said like “The laser says ’You Are Dead!’” or is it just me?
(Also I lost what little respect I had for Jake when he asked Dollars to ask Dan, seriously just do it yourself dude, given the current situation Dan won’t murder you just for asking a question! Way to potentially push a pal under the space-bus! Wait ... would space busses have wheels like a lunar-rover or would they hover? Thereby being useless for the purposes of running over idiots?)
Wait, this isn’t that Sinbad isn’t it? Man I loved that guy when I was a kid!
Maybe it’s my stubborn refusal to ignore sleep until I finish this but ... who da heck did Dan dub as Papa Smurf again?
Seriously when this Campaign is over Dan and Barro should totally do a Comedy Duo together, the brutally observant kind, not the OTT PC kind! You know? Cos they’d actually be funny!
... Really Nicky? After all the idiots that have come and gone in this story so far you’re brushing this possibility off so easily? (Unintended pun, sorry) No offence to our Dear Author but c’mon ... odds are someone would probably do that if not told explicitly not to!
Phew and that’s everything I loved (most) about this week’s chapter and I’ll eagerly await the next!
Awesome as always and I’ll see you ~next time~
Your Eternal Fan
^_^
(I hope your Nightmare Night was fun in some way Good Author, you truly deserve it for brightening my week every week)
listening in on the conversation as always Dollars Discreetly tucks a comb back into one of the many compartments of his armor...
~Dollars
*comb comb comb*