Episode 15 Bonus Chapter: Vice Vs. Equestria's Finest
Couple hours later...
Determination Mountains, South-West of the Peace Prevails National Park
En Route to Equestrian Royalist Forces
Vice Grip practically squee'd with delight. Having fun at Dan's expense had been an epiphany of sorts for the scientist, one he couldn't help himself from trying to take advantage of further. Although Knight's EMP pulse made it so Vice could no longer technoport or track using Dan's phone, Vice was able to trace the brief phone call he made to a general location north of Appleloosa.
Zen Zeal and his Zebra Legions had invaded Equestria from the central border in the north, a few hundred miles east of the Crystal Empire. The Zebras then cut a swath through Equestria, severing rail lines to the north and Saddle Arabia before hitting Manehattan. Zeal then pushed south-west in a long march to Appleloosa, seemingly avoiding a direct march to Canterlot itself but in reality, it was clear to see what the zebras were doing. Their attack route was shaped like a massive zigzag from Saddle-Arabia in the far north-west, through the border towns and then down to Manehattan and now to Appleloosa, somewhere near Easy Junction. Whether it was intentional or not, Vice Grip didn't know.
But in fact, it was somewhat intentional... and somewhat unintentional. Equestria's own magic liked to influence things, guide things in tiny ways. It had a will of its own, something the Director absolutely hated. So although the zebras had indeed planned the route of their march, the exact shape of it had been something decided by Equestria herself, a comical and cartoony pun the planet made on some omnipresent sentient level. It was like giving yourself a tattoo, though Dan was planning on making it a temporary tattoo at best. Still, fun to look at from a geographical perspective.
And Vice was now going to change that. He decided he would take Phoenix's advice and help them fight the zebras- and destroy Dan, Phoenix and their army in the process. To that end, the scientist was driving his land vehicle, the Mini-SHED, with three mini-Sword Spells on a mobile launcher he was eager to test out on both Dan and the zebras. And a third one just to nuke Appleloosa. Nuke Appleloosa: cross that western relic off the list, finally.
The road was rocky but mostly flat. Vice had no trouble driving and estimated he'd be ready to surprise Dan and the others pretty soon. Above him, the skies were mostly clear, a reflexive action to the newly-restored Cloudsdale still preparing to resume its role following its repair. Vice didn't notice the Team Plasma Frigate high above, making its way back to his own base.
*BewwwwwBANG!*
"FUUUUUUUUUU-!!!" A tire blew out on the Mini-SHED, sending Vice's vehicle careening into a rock wall. Not quite as sturdy as Booster Spice's original design, the front of the Mini-SHED was totaled. Behind the wheel, Vice lifted his head up, rattled but unscathed. Like Dan, he always wore a seatbelt. Safety was everyone's priority.
*Squeeeeeeessshhh* The airbag deployed, squeeing as it did so in Vice's face. "AAAH-airbag, dammit!" He mashed the delayed safety device back into the steering wheel.
Climbing out of the vehicle, it was apparent from the outside that it was demolished. More concerned with keeping the cargo protected than the drivers, he hadn't armored the front cabin. The small engine compartment had smashed into the rock face, crumpling into bits. He wouldn't be able to repair it until he got back to Prosperity Base.
He walked around to the other side of the van, examining the wheels as he did. The left-front wheel hadn't suffered a blowout; it had been pierced by a gem of something. He pulled out a diamond-shaped blue crystal. It looked like it hadn't just impacted the wheel- it had detonated. Vice looked around, trying to find a culprit. In front of him, oddly enough, was another rock wall. If the tire hadn't blown out, it was likely he would've hit it instead, if he hadn't been paying attention. The scientist walked towards it, suspicious.
Vice was thinking it looked a little too neatly-packed, a little too like a barricade than a natural formation when it exploded.
"GAAH!" He had to dive out of the way to avoid a shower of debris. "Okay, Dan, is this one of your pranks? Using phones as tracking devices was my idea, pal!" he yelled. But no one answered him. The debris from the rubble cleared and when Vice looked again, he saw a figure standing in the middle of the road. "What?" he squinted, "Who's there?"
The figure walked towards him. As it did, it spread out, revealing that it was four individuals approaching him. Four ponies walked in a line, blocking the path ahead. They stopped stopped just a few feet away from him.
"-ning the trace now, it won't take long."
"Good. Plan?"
"You go in high, we'll hit from the front and you from the back. Keep him boxed in."
"Got it."
"Understood."
"Just make sure you watch your aim, Cross."
"You say that every time. Every time, Spit."
"What the hell is this?" Vice asked, approaching them. "What are you doing here? Did you-"
"That's enough, Vice Grip," the first one, a stone-gray earth pony stallion said. He was wearing the armor of an Equestrian royal guard... only it looked stronger. Reinforced, sturdier, bulkier and harder-looking. And shinier.
"On behalf of Equestria, by the authority of the princesses, you are hereby under arrest! Surrender at once!" he announced. A pair of huge lances at his sides were raised high, gleaming with the reflection of the sun. Vice's eyes followed them all the way up to their tips... until they lowered and pointed right at him.
Royal Guard Elite Commander
High Marshal "Stonewall" Steadfast
Leader of the Equestrian Royal Guard
The second one, a brown unicorn chuckled. "I'd turn back now if I were you, mate. You're headed towards the professionals now, not a group of helpless bystanders." He folded his hooves at Vice, standing on his hindlegs in a mock stance of the scientist's.
Royal Guard Elite Commander
Chief Intelligence Operator Nightshade
Leader of the Special Tactics and Logistics Legion
The pegasus was actually one Vice Grip was aware of. She glared at him from underneath her goggles. "You think all your high-tech trash makes you tough? We could take down ten of your Magic Gears. WE can take down YOU."
Royal Guard Elite Commander
Wing Commander Spitfire
Leader of the Wonderbolts
Vice was forced to watch, awestruck as they taunted him.
"Hahaha!" the last one, an armored crystal pony laughed. "Give it up, Vice. We're the leaders of the Royal Guard. We're the best Equestria has to offer. You think you can take us all on, you just keep on coming, pal! HAHAHAHA!" He lowered a pair of massive sparkly miniguns and aimed them at the scientist. They began to whirr loudly as they spun up.
Royal Guard Elite Commander
Artillery Major Crossfire
Leader of the Crystal Imperial Guard
"Really?" Vice looked at all of them. "Is this little display honestly supposed to intimidate me? Ha, neither of your precious monarchs tried to intervene and one of them could see into my dreams. You think your threats frighten me?"
"They're supposed to make you think twice," "Stonewall" replied.
"And if you even think of trying to get past us, you won't get a chance to think twice," Spitfire replied.
Vice folded his arms. "You wrecked my van, arcanist. I want to see your insurance information."
"Insure this!" Crossfire sprayed the mini-SHED with a concentrated stream of blue crystals. Like a Needler's needles, they accumulated on the side of the vehicle and exploded, blasting a hole into the vehicle.
"Elite guards, charge! For Equestria!!"
"FOR EQUESTRIA!!!"
Quadruple Boss Battle Special!
Dan's Unlikely(And Unknown!) Allies:
Royal Guard Elite Commanders
Equestria's Finest
"Soarin! On my wing!" Spitfire leapt into the sky, rushing towards Vice.
"Oh, you ponies didn't think this through, did you?"
"Attack Pattern Sigma, go!"
"Copy."
"I copy!"
The pegasi rushed Vice. Within inches of him, they whipped around him just before they collided, blasting past him. The backdraft came close to blowing his lab coat clean off. They were fast, expected nothing less from the Wonderbolts, but they hadn't attacked him. In the split second Vice's brain tried to process why, the first crystalline blue needle sizzled past him.
*Bzzzzrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!* The crystal miniguns fired twin streams of blue shards.
The pegasi had been a distraction! Clever, but not quite quick enough. The first shard that whizzed by him had been spat out before the miniguns had completely spun up. Miniguns often had to "spool up" before reaching an optimum rate of fire, meaning their first shots were at a slower rate. Vice had been just fast enough on his feet to realize he was in Crossfire's crosshairs and summon his own shield before the blue needles hit.
Vice's own shield was a bright violet in color. He'd originally designed it after researching Celestia, Luna and Lightning Claw's energy shields. His own "improvements" would become evident if any of his attackers got close, but for now he was just being hammered with needles.
*Sschhh-clannng!* And that was when the lances smashed into him. The two lances penetrated Vice's shield and lifted him high in the air. "Ahhh-AAAAHH!!" Vice was flung; as quickly as the lances had lowered, they flung upward twice as fast, launching him like a catapult. He flew, spinning in his broken shield until he landed, or more accurately crashed, into a rock wall.
Vice had to pull his lab coat down from over his head. He stumbled getting up, but managed. Where had he been blasted? All around were the same craggy rocks, smoke trailing from the remains of the Mini-SHED nearby. Nothing helpful nearby and no chance of escape. He could hide, wait for them to get away and that thought was going through his mind when a blue shard landed next to him.
"CRAAAP!" Another blue needle hit closer, another one landing after that as he scrambled to get up. The Shuk-shuk-shuk! sound of shards followed him, quickly followed by the blasts as they exploded.
Vice ran, the heat and force of each exploding crystal hitting him in the back, running across the rocky ridge. He was running parallel to the main path he'd taken, but there was no way out. His genius mind then remembered that his boots could fly, and at that moment one of the pegasi grabbed him from under his forelegs and lifted him up in the air.
"I've got him! I've got him!"
"Don't get cocky, Soarin!" Spitfire yelled.
"Get the cuffs on him!" The Wonderbolts flew fast and acted fast. Even as Vice was processing what had happened, Soarin, the very pony who had snatched him, had slapped a pair of heavy bracers over his forelegs just above his gauntlets. Heavy, restrictive, stiff and unyielding, they were Royal Guard standard issue for dealing with troublemakers. Vice couldn't move his front legs or his articulated hand gloves.
"Get his legs!" Soarin yelled. The Wonderbolt held him tight, spiraling into a climb that made Vice dizzy. He had to admire the Wonderbolts' tactics and tenacity. The strategy of launching him into the air effectively made him helpless. Spinning and climbing while holding his back meant that Vice was absorbing the brunt of the inertia and the height made it so if they dropped him, they'd have plenty of time to recover him... or just let him fall. He was helpless in three different ways at once from the flawless strategy of the performance fliers.
But he had something they didn't know about. Spitfire climbed faster, reaching with her cuffs to get them around Vice's legs. With his limbs shackled, he'd be fully subdued. Game over. And all of this was happening in the fractions of seconds.
Even as Soarin yelled the order and Vice began to feel the inability to move his front legs, he felt Spitfire clamp the first shackle on his right hind leg. So he activated the jets on his left.
"AAHHH!! AAAHH!!" The jets blasted Spitfire right in the face, scorching her mask, mane and goggles. She broke off.
"Spitfire!" Soarin yelled. Concern for his teammate and longtime friend and leader briefly overrode Soarin's discipline for just a moment. His grip loosened on Vice's shoulders as he turned his head to look back, frantic to see if his commander was okay. And Vice used that moment to spin his balled iron fists right into Soarin's face.
*Crak-crak* "Aaaaggg!" The flier released him immediately. Soarin fell back, his goggles and nose broken by Vice's swift move. The third Wonderbolt, he didn't see.
His front legs were bound but his jets were active. He could escape, and moved to do that when his jets began to misfire.
"I've got the link! Hacking in now..." The third Wonderbolt, apparently a techy of some kind was hacking the software of his gadgets! The jets sputtered and the flare diminished, lower his altitude steadily. Within moments, he was back on the ground, but at least he could remove the shackles. Of course, he had a lockpick in his boots.
"You little soldiers think you got the drop on me," Vice said, unlocking the binds "I took out your precious princesses! All of them! You have NOTHING on me!"
*Bzzzzzrrrrrrrrrrrr!!* "We have this. You got one of these in your fancy shoes?" *Ssshhhhh-chikchikchikchikchikchikchik* Dozens of needles shot at him before he had time to think. One caught him in the shoulder, one in the boot, one ripped through the side of his labcoat. They exploded.
"AAARRRGGH!!" He was launched into the air again. Honestly, he didn't even remember hitting the ground. This time, he was on the other canyon rift, not that he realized it. He staggered to stand, his body smoldering from the heat.
"You... cronies... don't deserve... you don't understand..." He was too dazed to speak coherently. His right shoulder felt numb. "YOU'RE NOT BEATING ME!"
Major Crossfire vaulted up the canyon wall. "You should never have messed with Equestria's best!"
Vice spat. "Squee you!"
"FOR THE PRINCESS!" *Bzzzrrr*
"AAAAAAA!" Vice charged just as the miniguns started firing shards at him. The move caught the guard off-guard; he panicked and tried to dodge. Vice leaped into the air and brought his metal gauntlet down on Crossfire's face.
The crystal pony was tough, but not tough enough. At that close range, there wasn't much he could do. Vice lifted him up, flipped him over and crashed his head into the ground. His saddle and weapons slipped off of him.
"Next time, you should just shoot for the head," Vice said. With that, he lifted up one of the miniguns just in time to see "Stonewall" coming down at him. Specifically, his massive lances came down, nearly skewering him.
"You know nothing of honor! You know nothing of duty!"
"I know how to use a minigun." Vice spooled up the gun and fired at the larger guard. Blue bolts stuck to his armor and exploded, but Stonewall kept on coming.
"You'll have to do... better than that."
"How 'bout I just do MORE of that?!" Vice picked up the second minigun and spooled them both up. He fired at the pony, overwhelming him with blue exploding crystals. Stonewall tried to shield himself with his lances but they were meant for attack, not defense. He charged at Vice, the blue shards mounting as they pierced his armor but the guard kept coming.
Vice backpedaled. The sheer amount of crystals built and built, not exploding yet as they continued to fire. Finally, the ammo ran dry. And Stonewall was right upon Vice.
Riddled with crystals, the pony knew he had only moments. He threw down both lances. The crystals surged with energy, resonating and combining into a single pulse, ready to explode. With the last of his strength, Stonewall took both his lances and pinned Vice to a rock with them.
"You... you can't... escape... this..."
Vice looked up at him. He held up his gauntlet and activated his shield. "I don't have to."
A bright, blue explosion ripped through the landscape. It shattered the rocky terrain, digging a massive gash into the surface of the rugged wasteland. When the dust settled, only one pony walked away from the ashes, and he did so on two legs.
Vice looked back at the battlefield. There was no movement, no sound, nothing else to bother him or get in his way. He decided that going against Dan right now, was not worth it. He climbed his way back down into the canyon and back to the mini-SHED.
He found Nightshade there waiting for them.
"Think you best be headin' home. Mate," Vice mocked him.
Nightshade folded his hooves. "Was about to say the same thing to you," he said, grinning.
Vice was exhausted. He wasn't in the mood for this in any sense of the word. Whatever patience he had was long gone.
"So, you ready to do this now?"
Vice raised his fists. "If you really want to join your friends that badly."
"Or your son."
Vice smashed his fist into the side of the SHED, but missed the pony he'd been aiming at. Instantly whipped into a fury, he lashed out at the pony with a flurry of blows, but none of them landed. Nightshade ducked, dodged and deftly dipped out of the way of every punch and jab thrown by Vice. In fact, it seemed that the more punches Vice threw, the further away he was getting. He tried to backhand the stallion and his gauntlet went right through the space he had been. Until finally, Vice realized the other pony was gone.
He looked around. Nightshade had vanished. It seemed impossible; he'd just been right in front of Vice, yet now he was gone. How had he known?
"We had to know what makes you tick, mate. Took a little effort but... eh, nothin' worth doin' is ever easy."
Nightshade was suddenly on a rocky outcropping at the edge of the canyon.
"What the hell was this?" Vice demanded. He looked back to the SHED. Nightshade had hacked his computer system, the console connecting to the Gear network. The satellites, the security codes, the data, all accessible.
"You have a lot of neat toys, Mr. Vice. Now, you'll have to learn to share them."
Vice was about to ask what he meant by that, the revelation not yet dawning on him, when Nightshade vanished. The scientist spent a few minutes going through the wreckage of his vehicle before deciding there was nothing left to salvage. He walked back home, knowing that he was well and truly alone.
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“Season 1”
Bruhh gonna have 1000 chapters and then do “Season 2”
10657609
Probably not a thousand.
Hmm.
Pi Filling.
Fare well Stonewall, you shall rise again.
Pass the yeast.
Alternate title:
Elderly scientist's car breaks down, and he gets a lift from some friendly pegasi.
10657828
HA! Very funny, I like it. Approved.
10666409
That's rough. Does that mean Rice's ultimate revenge plan is to do nothing for a few months and hope Dan dies of boredom?
10666685
Rice's revenge was never about Dan. In the end, he was just a pony who suffered injustice, as many have, and was unable to reconcile it. Imagine if Dan was unable to get revenge on anyone, forced to live in a world where something so wrong happened that it broke their perception of reality... and since perception can be reality, it would create two worlds, one being the ideal and the real one. A status quo that lingered on for a thousand years, hatred building until finally...
If tragedy happens by random or because of another pony, does that make the sufferer any less tragic? If you knew something was wrong and could change it, why wouldn't you? What would stop you if you were so sure of yourself?
I'm just the writer. I'm not going to answer these questions for you; I'm just going to show you how these questions can e answered. Two different ways out of infinite possibilities. You can decide which one is right for yourself. Is it right for Dan to still want revenge on Rice after everything? Was Celestia right to just forgive him? Are Twilight, Spike and Chrys being good friends by encouraging Dan to go along with it?
Rice just wanted his son back. In a realm where the impossible can happens, he asked why the impossible must still exist when reality can be bent to the desires of those in it. He failed to realize that the impossible must exist for us to keep doing the impossible. The switch can not be off and on at the same time, he cannot have it both ways.
Or can he?
Wait, a Bonus-Bonus Chapter this week? Truly youmspoil us Dear Author!
... Not gonna lie, this whole “good guys nearly beat the bad guy but flub it at the last minute” scene reminds me so much of the last fight with Thanos in Infinity War (I still freaking hate “Star Lord” for that whole mess!) ... but I don’t blame Spitfire, because I actually like Spitfire! Actually this whole Team is pretty cool, they didn’t get the bad guy but they didn’t screw up the way that guy did!
Thanks for this Bonus-Bonus chapter and I’ll eagerly await the next.
Thank you for making my weekend that much better twice and I’ll see you …next time~
Your Sternal Fan
^_^
10667841
This fight is something I've worked on for a couple of years. It's actually based on another boss fight, with a few twists.
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/38cc5096-8d90-4e3a-8295-d2faa16bc34f/ddcb6m6-c6f7149c-aef3-474e-8cc3-1b3a8641006c.png/v1/fill/w_1024,h_531,q_80,strp/the_cartel_warlords_by_craftyrebelbobdog_ddcb6m6-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOiIsImlzcyI6InVybjphcHA6Iiwib2JqIjpbW3siaGVpZ2h0IjoiPD01MzEiLCJwYXRoIjoiXC9mXC8zOGNjNTA5Ni04ZDkwLTRlM2EtODI5NS1kMmZhYTE2YmMzNGZcL2RkY2I2bTYtYzZmNzE0OWMtYWVmMy00NzRlLThjYzMtMWIzYTg2NDEwMDZjLnBuZyIsIndpZHRoIjoiPD0xMDI0In1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmltYWdlLm9wZXJhdGlvbnMiXX0.LrXluKToeRpG_SVcxRY_StJ0UvoFMYEX1w-oVJxXs-o
Power levels are bullshit.