Letter 60
Dear Princess Cellulose,
Today I learned that photosynthesis is an extremely painful process when performed by mammals.
Like I do every year, I was wandering the Badlands before the winter solstice, but I didn’t bring enough food with me. I hadn’t accounted for my total lack of self-restraint when it comes to eating, and as a result, I ran out in the middle of my trip. I didn’t want to eat bugs because I guess I have standards now, so I decided to forsake all laws of nature and turn myself partially into a plant.
However, I remembered what you said about using untested spells, so I cast it on a shrew first. It turned green, grew some leaves, and then ran off, so I thought casting it on myself would be k. It was not k.
The following hours were the most excruciating of my entire life. I was in so much pain that I even tried scraping my own leaves off; that only made it worse. But as bad as the physical pain was, the psychological pain was infinitely worse. My mind had become more plant than pony. Every leaf was a new piece of my soul, and as I tore each one from my body, I began to bleed. Plants were not meant to bleed, Celestia.
The lingering effects will fully subside by tomorrow. I swear I will only use standard spells from this day forward, or until I inevitably repress this memory and go back to fucking around with perverse magic.
Your blight of the world,
Twiggie SmallsShe’s started talking to plants when she thinks no one else is around. I would be concerned, but the topics are hilarious. She’s been trying to comfort Spike’s lima bean because it hasn’t germinated yet.
Love, Anon
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So this is what happens when Twilight tries turning herself into Poison Ivy?
K
It was not k.
Well she can worn Fluttershy that beginning a plant(tree) is not fun. The bright side things I guess.
Someone needs to lecture the Purple One about The Second Law of Magic.
Careful Anon, that's dangerously close to "Dear Princess Fatty," whether you intend it that way or not...
You've got that right . Has a side note , that letter would be terrifying to read IRL .
Anyone else remember that time when Fluttershy was a tree?
i.imgur.com/kKxOrQ4.jpg
This reply will be interesting
9883386
He already told her she had a fat ass, and makes it clear he likes Luna more.
She would have done something to him by now if it really bothered her.
Yeah, being partially plant would mean that her body is producing sugar-stuffs(I forgot what it's actually called, okay?). Blood is not supposed to have sugar directly in it.
Also, some plants DO bleed. In particular: trees. We call it sap.
9884534
Exactly what I thought.
9883382
I'm pleasantly surprised so many people got that reference. And yeah, Twilight isn't in Harry Potter. This here be serious magic!
9883304
It certainly wasn't k, that's for sure.
9883382
What is the second law of magic? And the first for that matter?
9883546
fallout equestria?
10104674
That really depends on what setting we’re talking about since magic is one of those things that get highly idiosyncratic and rarely work exactly the same way whenever we compare any two fictional worlds.
One semi-appropriate one here might be the Second Law of Magic -- of seven in total -- from the Harry Dresden universe: “Never transform another”. I call it semi-appropriate because transforming one’s self (if one is dumb enough to try) is an obvious loophole, and in any event those laws apply primarily to the use of magic on other humans, who in that setting mostly tend to be terminally clueless about the supernatural and so make for potentially easy victims. (Which helps explain why the customary penalty for breaking any of the Laws is death even on a first offense. Now that would presumably never fly in Equestria!)