Letter 88
To the Equestrian Princess Celestia,
I write to you in order to express great sorrow.
It seems the Neato Burrito my friend Anonymous speaks of does not exist in this world. I have dreamed of tasting such a thing ever since learning of it, yet those dreams are now shattered. I have never felt such an overwhelming sense of loss before. I struggle to find the words to properly express this pain.
Anonymous tells me that life is full of many such revelations. In your countless years, I cannot fathom how many times you have gone through this same experience, and yet you stand as an idol of fortitude for all to admire. I can only hope to one day posses an inner strength comparable to your own.
Stu Luck Pid
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The real Neato Burrito was the friends we made along the way.
Don't give up, Stupid.
Given his allergies, this is probably for the best.
Well, I found burritos that are edible for changelings
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Aww, Poor Stupid. All he wants is a Burrito.
9931823
Love is stored in the bat!
unless that's a vore jokeGood god, I would NOT want to see what Mexican food would do to the poor, dumb bastard.
For some reason this really reminds me of the Sad Dog Diaries by Zefrank. I now imagine Stu to sound like Zefrank. This makes his letters. So. Much. Better.
Crappy music starts
It’s stuuuuu llluvk pid
Duhdudhusduuuudhdudu
Stu luck pid
Duhduduudhuddug
WHERE IS MY PAYCHECK
9932001
He'd become a God for his race, not even the Sun tyrant could stop him!! (contrary to the perception the american bastardization of the Mexican food has caused, the Mexican food is composed of: 97% love, 2.5% nutrients sources, 0.475% water and 0.025% fat
9931823
nah... too much batrans fat on those...
9932035
And 300% wrath of Montezuma.
I wonder how Juan is doing?
9932053
No... Y'all are just Lightweights...
9931823
That a corn tortilla? He’s gluten intolerant remember?
He's been given devastating news.
His first thought?
Sympathy for Celestia, reasoning that she's been similarly devastated far more times than he has.
That's... actually really sweet.
Stu must be protected at all costs.
You didn't put a very obvious ref in this letter ...
Because of it , my disappointment is immeasurable , and my day is ruined.
I await the day when 2Merr runs out of ideas
oh wait, that was the start of this fic.
*keks in hoers*
9933777
That's quite true. Mayhaps I didn't express myself properly but now we have your improved version for future readers' enjoyment.
Welp, I am now caught up and can't wait to see what zany high jinks will occur in the next iteration of Dear Princess Sunbutt.
Me when I was six.
9953208
Thank you for quoting the entire letter. It would’ve been impossible to know what you were talking about otherwise.
9932250
Gluten exists only in wheat and plants related to wheat.
Corn is not related to wheat, therefore corn has no gluten.
This is my favourite so far. That not only is Stupid heartbroken over not having a burrito, but that in this difficult time he thought of Celestia and all the times am immortal like her has been forced to cope with similar disappointment.