• Published 27th Sep 2019
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Dear Princess Sunbutt - 2Merr



Anon takes over Spike’s job of transcribing Twilight’s friendship reports. He does exactly what you’d expect.

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Letter 127

Dear Princess Light Theme,

I happened upon a book today by someone named Lifted Wings. They talked about loss and how it can cling to your soul if you don’t get closure. I haven’t allowed myself to have closure, mostly because I have no lingering emotions for anything that isn’t immediately useful or named Trixie. In light of this, I have decided to hold a number of funerals for those I have lost. They will be held tomorrow, one after the other, because there’s no way in hell I’m pretending to care for longer than a day.

The first few will be for each of my previous bodies. There are probably more I haven’t told anyone about, but those don’t matter. The next two will be for Trixie’s bodies. Hers will be missed the most. The last will be for Goatmeal. After a long and funny life, he finally dried out yesterday. He was starting to stink anyway, and goat milk is expensive.

You and Dark Theme are both invited, but I know princesses are busy, so don’t feel pressured to come. It's okay if you don’t care about your student’s many tragic deaths and don’t want to say anything good about me in front of other people. I understand.

Your self-replicating suicide bomber,
The Priestess of Purple

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