Dear Princess Sunbutt,
Spike is off doing dragon shit for who knows how long, so I’m making my fuckmonkey write this for me. Sorry you have to deal with his unfamiliar writing style and dashing good looks. I could very easily write my own damn friendship reports, but I get off to treating everyone around me like slaves.
Today I learned that being a cunt makes other people not like you. Apologizing for your cuntish behavior is the first step to fixing whatever relationships you fucked up with said cuntish behavior. True friends will forgive you. Truer friends won’t act like cunts in the first place, but I’m too dumb and purple to understand that one.
Your failed social experiment,
Twinkle Sprinkle
Celestia’s reply
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Well that first letter got you a follow definently looking forward to more lol keep it up
Well, that is both a delight to read, and at the same time all very true.
Oh this is gonna be a fun read
To my most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle,
I have received your missive and friendship lesson courtesy of Anon. I'm glad to hear Spike has decided to explore his options as an Equestrian Citizen, and will ensure I keep in touch with him for you. I admit I am proud of you for trying to make Anon feel as though they fit in by giving them meaningful tasks, but perhaps you should make an effort to write me yourself on occasion. I do miss your direct contact from time to time.
As per your friendship lesson... that is a very important lesson indeed. We may not always succeed in putting our best hooves forward, but it's important to acknowledge our mistakes and make amends.
Your loving mentor,
Princess Celestia.
PS. It's nice to see you are adjusting to your life in Equestria, Anon. I appreciate your razor whit and most esteemable and eloquent conveyance of the pleasure of your current position. I know I sometimes feel your own difficulties equally.
this letter made me laugh 3 separate time's. love it
Oh gees that closing!
9855213
I laughed, and then felt guilty for it.
Hey, it's exactly like in the Frenemies episode...
O shit... Troll-Anon on the lose...
Oh, god why is this so funny.
Twinkle Sprinkle.
This got me good.
She is a social experiment!
Alright. I'll admit I've put reading this off for way too long. First chapter done and I'm already hooked. Well done, my friend.
P.S. Try reading this whole thing in Strong Bad's voice.
9854201
I can't figure out what episode this lesson is referencing.
—Edit—
NM, I figured out after a few chapters after these are directly based on them. But what is the time period for this? Season 1?
A nice start, can't wait to see where this ends up.
*Wheeeze.
Love it already.
I already know that I’m going to love this fic just by the description.
re-reading.
its like the Sniper's letter but wth more snark.