• Published 27th Sep 2019
  • 26,769 Views, 3,937 Comments

Dear Princess Sunbutt - 2Merr



Anon takes over Spike’s job of transcribing Twilight’s friendship reports. He does exactly what you’d expect.

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Letter 138

Author's Note:

For context: Letters 86.4, 86.5, and 114

Dear Princess Nicecream Fundae,

I just got word from our good pal Chryssi. There’s a changeling civil war brewing down in the Badlands. Apparently some rogue hives have teamed up to take down Mega Milf because she’s been talking about progessive ideas like shooting her people to make the world a better place.

The messenger she sent explicitly stated that she’s dumb and doesn’t want any help. She only wanted to let you know not to attack her bugs if you see them flying south.

Now, I’m not one to make rash judgement calls, but this is the perfect opportunity for genocide. I’m calling it “neutralization,” but we all know what I really mean.

Most, if not all, of the changelings in Equestria will be in one general location, and they’ll all be preoccupied with infighting. It would be so easy. No fuss, no muss, just one big ol’ solar slaparooni and the changelings will be no more.* Even if a queen or two escapes, it still means they’ll be out of our hair for at least a couple centuries, and the Badlands are already near-uninhabitable anyway, so any collateral damage would be negligible. Just think about it, okay?

Your crime against morality,
Twilent Night


* I don’t need to tell you this, but please don’t. Besides, the “reeeeeeeee, don’t help” might be reverse psychology if the changelings are setting up a trap. I think it’s safer to leave them be. Also, Stu was there when the messenger came, so now he’s doing that thing with his eye fluids again. I know your creeper dudes are already watching him, but can you tell them to be extra careful? I’m worried he might run off to intervene and trip on something he’s allergic to, and then I’ll be held responsible. I don’t want to deal with that.

Love, Anon

PreviousChapters
Comments ( 33 )

Wait, is this before or after Thorax became king?

10719441
there is no thorax here

Wow. Twilight's going full Dark Tag on us now.

How did I miss "Chrys Chan" before?

10719488
That must be a very fucked-up-looking bug, then.

10719441
AFAIR we haven't even gone through any notable season 3 events yet. Although I may have forgotten some chapter indicating where in correlation to the main timeline we are. Pinkie babysitting the twins would put us at least in the later half of season 2 but possibly later.

10719441
Twilight stumbled on him one night while looking around the outside of the empire, and thought he’d make a good test subject. Her experiment was to see if she could turn him into herself, but his being couldn’t handle the sudden and immense exposure to the sheer purple required to turn him into an exact copy of Twilight, and he exploded.

She has tried her best to make sure no one ever finds out.

10719506
Discord is hanging around, so it’s more like late season 3. The timeline is weird, don’t think about it too much.

No! Not Stu!

Idea: have the elements of harmony fire their OFC at a giant piece of refracting glass over the top of the badlands. Disperse the rainbow laser over all the changelings at the same time. Bam, friendship’ed changelings.

... Actually, refracting light MAKES rainbows. For all I know about magic laser beams this might make a disco ball of death and genocide them all the same. Nevermind, purple idea. :twilightsheepish:

Stu has reached the sacred rank of CINNAMON ROLL
he's too pure for this world

Aww, anon cares! Not only about Stu, but about Chris-chan too! :yay:

10719493
Now?

D48
D48 #12 · Mar 13th, 2021 · · ·

...This really needs to turn into a proper letter exchange. I miss Snow's companion story. :fluttershysad:

Try to run off and help his family only to faceplant into some poison joke immediately after leaving town? Sounds like something Stu would do.

Your crime against morality,
Twilent Night

Should I assume that at some point, there was an 'All is Twight' incident?

10719889
We don't talk about the time she tried to make SCP 963.

Twi's not wrong. But at the same time her idea is wrong.

10719782
I know right, I mean these are still great to read but without the responses its just missing something.

Even if a queen or two escapes, it still means they’ll be out of our hair for at least a couple centuries,

By which time they'll have put any differences aside in favor of working towards revenge against the race that tried to wipe them out.

Oh my. This could go in a number of directions. But yeah, nuking the site from orbit doesn't seem like the best option.

10719488
See, that just has me imagining Stu going full faerie-moose himself. If any changeling could metamorphose by accident...

10719493
I think you're forgetting the entire rest of the story, the dark tag was earned LONG ago.

o shit this fic is pretty good

Ya know, I think you might want to start splitting the letters into volumes, maybe making each volume right equivalent to each Season or in-universe year.

But as always, very happy to see new additions!

10729805
Cool, so would you inform us of this book? I would grin knowing who could print books without including missing units of print.

10719554

Any chance we'll get to see Sunset show up and try to prove how very not-purple she is compared to Twiggles?

10735845
There was a plan to reference her in the address with Anon calling Celestia Princess Sunset, saying Twilight told him to never bring that name up (which of course would only make him do it).

As for bringing her in as a character, very unlikely.

11002706
Oversaturated World, by FoME. All hail the Divine Bacon Horse.

11005517
11005528
It’s been two years since those comments were made. You’re the one bringing it back up.

11005928
But as long as we're talking about it again...

11104451
oh. ok. was more wondering if it was related to fan fictions thst you read. than actual episodes of the show.

11104466
Nope. It’s mostly original, for better or worse.

Is this still continuing by any chance?

I enjoyed reading this immensely. Thanks for writing it :heart:

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