Dear Princess Sunbutt

by 2Merr

Letter 28.1

Dear Princess Starfire,

The apple is still screaming. Silencing spells don’t work on it because it has no mouth. I’ve got it mostly muffled with some towels inside a locked chest.

Anon bravely offered to smash it, but I’m growing a conscience at the most inconvenient time possible. If it’s alive, what right do we have to kill it?* Would it be a mercy to end its tortured existence? I’m trying my best to not come up with an answer so Anon suffers as long as possible.

Your first fruit wizard,
Buttlight Fuckle

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* Fruits aren’t protected under Equestrian law. Even if it’s alive, murdering it is 100% legal. Believe me, I triple checked. I just want the screaming to stop.

Love, Anon

Comments

[FTR2017]

Anon: Oh god, why!?

Twilight: I wonder if we were to mix it with a spider we could get a walking pet apple.

Anon: That's it! I'm getting the pulper!

Twilight: Nooooooo!! My portable apple!

[vinyldash23]

It's not even alive. It's not murder. Come on, Twilight, I thought you knew how basic things work. if the apple comes off the tree, it dead.

[Bronzer]

Quick! Nobody remind Twilight that fruits basically plant babies!

[Zakariath]

Buttlight Fuckle

That's a keeper

[PinkDragonJr]

hey Buttlight, you kniw hat else makes noise and doesn't have a mouth? a radio. it's not murder to smash one of those either.