Anonymous is Princess Celestia's royal bodyguard, serving to protect her at any and all instances. While always close to the Princess, events may conspire to test his convictions as threats both old and new rise to attempt to swallow Equestria.

-My second AiE fic, put in loving prose for all you FiMfictioners.

TD, the human first seen in No, I am NOT a Brony, GET ME OUTTA EQUESTRIA!!! has been in Equestria for a little over a year now and he's just beginning to fully adjust to his life there. However, when he wakes up one morning to discover that five of the Mane Six have switched cutie marks, he endures a significant change when he helps them out.

He is less than pleased.

Edited wonderfully by Strike89

Buy a print copy here!

This story is a sequel to No, I Am Not A Brony, Get Me Outta Equestria!

After leaving Ponyville, the human TD Harrison Powell finds himself in even stranger territory than the land of the ponies. Will he find his way home? Or will he find out that he should have stayed in Ponyville under the watchful eyes of the Royal Sisters after all?

Edited by the amazing Jack Kellar and Marioland1

Special thanks to MyHobby for the cover art!!

"We wear the mask that grins and lies, It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes."
— Paul Laurence Dunbar

It started as a normal Equestrian morning, but doesn't it always? The princesses are frightened, and in Ponyville, a creature from a forgotten race walks into town. His kind hasn't been seen in over a thousand years, but even then he's still far from what he appears to be.

Arc 1: The First Day

Author's Note: Hey guys! This is my first story, so constructive criticism is more than welcome. I'll take this moment to say that I own nothing but my main character, the plot, and a few surprises which will appear later. All other characters and linked music are NOT mine. A word on music. At times I might offer two links to a song. The first is the OFFICIAL version, the second is the closest approximation to how I feel it is sung in the story. Just warning you, because I know some people hate covers. This story is rated teen for occasional language, implied sex, and gruesome imagery (mostly late in the story and in flashbacks). Now with technical out of the way, I wish you all happy reading, and I hope you have fun.

Edit: Bug the writer! He writes faster when you do.

In a universe where humans are quite shocked to find ponies that speak languages at all, let alone English, the startling discoveries never seem to stop for the poor crew of the SMS Verreiter IV, an old-warship-turned-exploration-vessel hybrid that's certainly seen better days. Heck, some even speak of times that it had days where all the systems functioned properly for hours at a time.

Either way, they're on a mission of exploration, which means they'll be visiting every Old Earth-sized rock they can find. With a motley consignment composed of few jittery scientists, veteran marines, an exasperated captain, and a combat-hardened, battle-forged crew with absolutely nothing to do besides repair their own ship from itself, it seems like it'll be a very long year of exploration.

Then they find a planet with some rather startling similarities to human society.

Like Manehattan, the apparent parody of the American district, ponies having developed the English language, and the use of human-like tools and buildings.

And when the ship's transmitter fails at the worst possible moment, Forschungsschiff Kapitan Arnhem Zorner has to decide how best to introduce his country and humanity to these beings. Who can levitate books probably as easily as they could levitate knives and hurl them at him.

He doesn't know whether to laugh of cry at the situation that's been thrown at his face.

I'd heard about the TV show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic from my college roommate who is way too into the show. Disturbingly so, actually, but good gravy I would never watch the darned thing! What am I, five? I've got better things to do with my time than watch a silly little girl's show. However, that didn't stop... something from transporting me into the world of the show, so here I am... in Equestria... trying to get home. This is gonna be interesting.

Special thanks to GuyFace, Jack Kellar, Storm Shaker, Spiffy McSquee, and Goober Trooper for helping me with this one!

Chris and Keon are two zoology majors that get separated from their class after following what Chris believed to be an undiscovered species of bird, during a trip into the Amazon rainforest.

Finding themselves stuck in a pit, they discover an ancient ruin adorned with murals and statues of what they believed to be ponies. They soon realize that the bird in question was the orchestrator of their fate, as they’re brought to what they are certain is their deaths.

Waking up, they are not only separated from each other, but in a new land entirely. Will they take this opportunity to learn about creatures only ever seen in legend, or will they be too busy being studied themselves?

Rated teen for sexual themes, crude humor, mild drug use.
(Edited by DF)

The Princesses find an alien creature barely clinging to life at the scene of a terrifying crash. Can the Combined Power of the Elements of Harmony save it, or more importantly, should they save it? Will the arrival of this strange creature tear Equestria apart?

TV Tropes
https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/FanFic/Article2

Lyra, a simple pony with simple dreams. Dreams involving aliens, that is. Her fascination with them even got her a job dealing with them, though no one takes it seriously. Lyra hopes to one day be able to meet one, she just needs to believe.

In comes a human, whom mysteriously gets transported to Equestria. It's up to Lyra to show the alien the ways of her people! The power of friendship, magic, and hugs await her on this strange adventure.

'What is it about humans that urges them seek out so many endeavors in order to feed their desires? Greed, power, family, friends, philosophy, knowledge; infinite goals and infinite reasons behind them. Whoever or whatever created these beings are either cunning; to create self motivating creatures that will constantly push the limits of what's possible, or downright cruel; never truly allowing them to feel true fulfillment or satisfaction. The point is humans were created with a void, a missing piece left intentionally empty never to be filled, an undying hunger.'

A bit grim right? The names Rodney, and in case you're wondering, this is the story of my life. A life of Magic, Gods, and regrettably, Ponies. Yeah, freakin-multi-techno-collored-goody-ponies.
But it's not all bad really, got way healthier with a more green diet. Though the lack of meat can be painful at times, that one landed me in less than desired situations. I get to screw with innocent ponies on a regular basis. Didn't kill myself or everyone else with me either. So not a bad deal really, even ended up retiring as teacher.

Teen for language and some adult themes.
This takes place before season 3.

HIATUS: Currently at a programmer's boot camp. Will be done late June 2015.

AN: If you can see past my cruddy writing skills there's plenty to tickle your funny bones, I hope. First attempt at writing a fic.