“There we go! I do hope the patient’s doing well.”
Moaning, Anon woke up to someone stirring him awake. His left arm felt like it was stuck in some contraption, like a cast. Something was poking around at his body, slowly making its way from his stomach up to his chest.
“Perhaps the patient would like… a treat?” someone said sensually. “Hmm, yes he would.”
Shooting his eyes open, it took a moment to see straight. Even still, as his eyes started to clear, he could see something quite unexpected: It was Crumble, attempting to give him a sultry look while it wore a cookie nurse outfit.
Screaming in terror, the cookie made a jump for his opened mouth. He turned his head to the side just in time, blocking the cookie access to his mouth. It merely bounced off his cheek and onto the bed, which then climbed right up the linens in an instant to try once more.
“I know nobody likes hospital food, but I can assure you I’m quite scrumptious!” The cookie walked up to his head, pushing against it. Anon shook his head, trying to get the cookie off. “Oh come on now! I got dressed up and everything for this!” The cookie jumped on his chest and turned around, shaking her tail at him. “I know you want soooooome!”
Turning his head at the cookie, Anon inhaled deeply through his mouth before throwing a mighty gust of air at the cookie. It flew off away from him with a squeal, rolling away down his chest. It was just then that the door opened with the room filling with ponies he recognized, coming in and looking worried.
“Anon!” Vinyl exclaimed. “We heard you screaming and—”
Everyone’s eyes were directed at the cookie, trying to stand back up. The cookie looked around the room at the ponies, chuckling.
“There you are!” Pinkie squeaked out, rushing to the cookie. “I’ve been looking all over for you!” She bent down with her head near the cookie. “Didn’t work, huh?” she whispered.
“Nooo,” it whispered back.
“Pinkie, why are you trying to help this cookie molest my mouth?”
Pinkie did her best to look offended, failing of course. “Whaaaaat? Nooooo, I would never do such a thing!”
“…Why does the cookie have a nurse outfit baked on?”
The pink mare looked off to the side, scrunching her face up. Anon could only sigh, watching Pinkie swipe the cookie away and backing off from the rest before leaving the room.
“How are you doing?” Twilight asked, walking up to the foot of the bed.
“Fine, I suppose. Feeling pretty stiff at the moment.”
“It’s probably due to the effects of our treatments,” a nurse piped in. “We had to use herbal remedies on you.”
Looking at her, Anon could see she was examining some weird machines that were hooked up to his head, something he only just then noticed.
“Why is my head—”
Anon paused, remembering the creature from the cave. Bon Bon likely told them about it and they’re looking over it to ensure he was fine.
Feeling something on his right, he looked over and saw Lyra staring at him with watery eyes. “I’m sooooooowwwwwrrrryyyyyyyyyy,” she whined out.
“For what?”
“…Kn-Knocking you out.”
“Oh, that,” he said, remembering her slamming into him. It was a slight pain to go through all of that and to have Lyra giving him the KO in the end. “It’s not like you meant to do that, though warn me next time you decide to try and pile drive me into the ground.”
Bending down toward the floor, Lyra came back up with a bowl, pushing it toward him. “I made you some pudding…”
“Oh, um… thanks…” he said, grabbing the bowl.
‘There’s no spoon,’ he thought to himself, staring at the dish.
“If everypony could leave the room, I would like to talk to Anon alone,” Princess Celestia spoke out with a strange, motherly tone attached to her authority.
“What should we do now, princess?” Twilight asked as everyone started to leave, all but Lyra who only continued to look at Anon sadly.
Bon Bon walked up to her, taking a bite of her tale before tugging on it, pulling her out the door. “Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu,” Lyra whined the entire way.
“I’ve already told you that you should take a break from all the work you’ve been doing,” Celestia told Twilight with a small frown.
“I just want to be helpful, princess. I don’t have much to do right now anyway, what with no library here.”
“You should probably go out and visit the area with your friends then; this is a place where traders from all across the world happen. It would be a great learning experience. There should also be a research facility here that Lyra is very familiar with. You might convince her to take you there.”
“Okay, princess,” Twilight said dejectedly, making her way out the door.
“I do remember a certain assistant coming along on the ride here, Twilight,” Princess Celestia said, something that perked Twilight up. “He should be at the hotel where we’re staying.” Twilight gave a large smile hearing that before running out the door. The princess chuckled before turning to Anon. “So then, how are you feeling Anon?”
“As fine as I can be with a banged-up arm,” he replied, looking at his casted limb.
“The nurses tried their best to heal you, but there were complications that came up that forced them to use mundane healing methods over magic.”
“That’s strange, last time I was in ta hospital they used magic. Why did—”
Pausing, Anon noticed something popping up at the side of his bed: it was the thing that looked like Trogdor from back at the base.
“AAAAAAHHH!!!”
“AAAAAAHHH— Hehehehe, I do love yelling! Oh, you’re yelling at me…”
“Discord, leave the patient be,” one of the nurses told the chimera as she continued to look over the machines.
“It’s not like I knew he’d be offended with how I look! Hmmm… Maybe you’d prefer female company?” he asked, snapping his digits. Aaaand now he was a she. The princess frowned at him, something Discord rolled his/her eyes before snapping her/his digits once more, returning to his previous, still horrible to look at form. “Fiiiiine.”
“Discord, what are you doing here?” Princess Celestia asked with a frown.
“I was simply curious about the alien we were coming out here to retrieve and I wanted to see what all the fuss was about!” Getting up close to Anon’s face, Discord’s eyes bulged out in a cartoonish fashion. “I can see why you were upset with him coming here in the first place, princess. He does look somewhat similar to how they looked, though not as hairy nor having such a grand smile that they did.”
Confused at hearing that, Anon looked at the princess who had her face scrunched up, looking peeved at the chimera. “Discooooord…”
“I seem to recall being told about some kind of familiarity of something you disliked,” Anon said.
Looking at him, she let out a sigh, taking a moment to collect herself. “When you first arrived here, there was some… confusion to what exactly you were.”
“Ha! Understatement of the year!”
The princess narrowed her eyes at Discord before continuing, “The descriptions on you that I had read described something that we had to deal with over a thousand years ago called the…” Princess Celestia let out a shiver,” Bleuh Bleuh Bleuh.” Discord giggled hearing that. “I do apologize if I ever came off as antagonistic toward you.”
“The… Bleuh Bleuh Bleuh,” he said to himself. “That does sound familiar. Lyra had been telling me about them and ways to not have you compare them to me.”
Princess Celestia blushed, letting out a couch. “That, of course, is not what I wanted to talk to you about. I wanted to hear what you’ve gone through and to know what Bon Bon brought up to us.”
“Bon Bon?”
“She said you mentioned being attacked with magic in the head somewhere in the forest. But please, start at the beginning when you were first taken. I’d like to take full account of everything that’s happened.”
Giving her a nod, Anon started retelling her nearly everything that he went through, or at least a condensed version of it: from him being at the park to Lyra, to getting, and spending his time in a cell, and of course not forgetting his little event involving Cross Love. Princess Celestia had said they had collected the doctor and would most assuredly talk to him about his involvement in everything.
Discord, for the most part, had been floating around the room, occasionally dropping down to ask something himself or to be a nuisance. Celestia had been paying careful attention to his words, patiently waiting for him to finish. She abruptly stopped him once he started to discuss the cave, looking particularly rattled.
“Please, describe the being that attacked you once more…”
Anon nodded, “It was bipedal just like me, around the same height and build as well, though it could stretch its limbs from what I experienced. The thing was completely covered in pink hair, had a creepy smile, and had black beady eyes.” He shivered, remembering all of that. “And as I stated, it could use magic, even mentioning it was purely made of the stuff.”
Princess Celestia looked paler than before, not liking what he had said. “Anon, what you just described sounds suspiciously like the Bleuh Bleuh Bleuh.”
“But how is that possible?” he asked. “Couldn’t it have been something else? I remember Lyra told me your world has many unknown beings out there, so it may be just something we hadn’t seen before.”
“Oh?” Discord snaked his body close to Anon, snapping his digits. In his hands were a picture frame, showing a creature very close to what he had seen in the cave. “Something like this?”
“…Yeah, something like that. The one I saw was much lankier though.”
The chimera lifted an eyebrow hearing that, looking at the picture. “He must’ve done something strange to change his body like that; they’re not normally thin beings.”
“Wait, so they do have genders?” Anon asked. “I couldn’t tell at all.”
Discord merely shrugged, “They could be male, female… or even both! It’s hard to tell their genders unless—” He chuckled, looking at Anon, then at the princess. “Unless you shave their bodies completely bald! I remember a group of them did that to Celestia once, can’t recall why. It unnerved her for some reason or another at the time.
“See, now that was a group that did some fun chaos around the place, quite the creative lot!” The princess did not like hearing this; Discord ignored her, hugging the picture close to him. “How it makes me reminisce those times. Too bad they went overboard as they did. I will say they kind of resemble you in a way once they’re stripped of hair.”
“That’s not something I rather like hearing,” Anon muttered.
“Is there anything else I can do to fix this picture,” Discord said, now showing a pink beast that looked thinner. “Maybe I’ll hang it up in sunbutt’s room after it’s done.”
“You will do no such thing!”
Anon continued, “There wasn’t much else other than it stated how it liked to question things. Oh, and it had a name it said its siblings called it: Momus.”
“It was a named one?!” Discord exclaimed with giddiness. “That certainly explains how it managed to slip by us all this time!”
“Is there a difference between a named one and one not named?” Anon asked.
The princess decided to answer, “Most of the Bleuh Bleuh Bleuh didn’t have any real intelligence. They simply went across the lands to wreak havoc and madness anywhere they went, to varying degrees. The named ones, however, were different. Somehow they had gained proper intelligence that allowed them to think. In a strange twist, they caused the least amount of problems for me, though it didn’t mean they weren’t causing them.”
“Ah, the memories with those ones,” Discord said with a sigh. “I remember Momus, always wanting to question every little thing, mostly to annoy everyone around him. He specifically loved asking Luna things all the time: How much cheese does she process in a week? Why did everyone veer away from her? Does anyone truly appreciate her nights? Oh, how his questions annoyed us all!”
“Anon,” the princess started, ignoring Discord, “what exactly did Momus say or want with you? Anything can be of great help, possibly stopping whatever he has planned.”
“He mentioned wanting to get back at someone who used him a long time ago and somehow had outdone his siblings in something.” He paused for a moment to remember what had transpired. “Momus mentioned that… that I would be the one to stop whatever it was. He said he had viewed some lines, whatever that meant, and that I was his best bet to doing whatever he wanted. So he… did something to my head that he said would wind up killing him.”
“He… died?” Discord asked. “But… but how?”
“I don’t know. Momus only mentioned using forbidden spells and draining his magical essence to make his plans work, which used up all his magic. I didn’t even know you could run out. He wound up using the last bit of his magic when I was in the cave. He started with whatever he did to my head, and the second part was what he had done to cause some kind of distraction.”
“And for someone made purely of magic…” Celestia left it at that.
Discord stared at Anon for a few seconds before looking back at his picture, turning it left, and then right, staring at it. “Oh. I… I see…” he said, losing some of his energy all of a sudden.
“Are you sure he specifically said he viewed these lines, Anon?” The princess asked. Giving her a nod, she closed her eyes in thought. “I see. It appears that Momus likely used a powerful scrying spell. These lines he mentioned are likely the multiple possibilities that could happen. He must have used whatever spell he did to alter things around and change any instances he wanted. And you’re a part of it all.”
“So that’s it? I’m just stuck with this?” Anon let out a sigh. “I suppose you’ll want to lock me up somewhere. He did say whatever he planned I would be the one to head it all.”
The princess gave him a quizzical look, “Is that what you want?”
“Honestly… no. But what else is there?”
“Anon,” Princess Celestia said with a smile, “we’ll do no such things to you. I have dealt with many things in my past, including many oddities in magic such as these scrying spells. What I’ve learned about those is that no matter what we may try to do, it’s quite difficult to change whatever was predicted without using the same level of scrying spell. Locking you up would do you no good and make everyone around you miserable.”
“Couldn’t you just use whatever spell he did and see what he wanted to do?”
Celestia shook her head, “While I could, it would drain me of my magic for a long time, and even then I wouldn’t truly know of what he would have planned for you. Scrying the lines aren’t just something you do; even Starswirl would be hesitant about using such spells. It can drive one mad. Though, I’m not interested in attempting such a spell. What I am curious about is what his second spell could be.”
“So this scrying wound up killing him,” Anon said, more to himself. “I don’t understand why he died of magic depletion. I thought everything here was made of magic.”
“Not really,” Discord said, still looking at the picture. “Everything here is filled with it to different extents, but the Bleuh Bleuh Bleuh was truly made of pure magic. Magic depletion is a death sentence for them. It’s… something I neglected to plan on when I created them; I simply gave them massive supplies of magic, not giving regenerative powers any thought. I should have been more attentive to that little detail.”
“Regardless of him depleting his core, what currently worries me is who he was after. Could it be he was targeting me or my sister?”
“No,” Discord flatly answered. “If he was, he would simply cause some chaos here or there, and being a named one, that gave him more sensibility and reasoning of things. They were forces of chaos, but they wouldn’t just act out on silly revenge on things like their banishment, especially if it meant their core being wiped out. No, Momus wasn’t the type to hold a grudge over something that he so rightly deserved.” Discord rubbed the face of Momus in the picture.
“So it’s something that even he would act out on, meaning it’s a massive threat to us,” Celestia said with worry.
Discord did not reply, still looking at his picture. The room remained silent as everyone stewed around in their thoughts.
“Where is this cave, Anon?” the princess asked.
“It’s not a cave anymore; it turned into rock last I saw. It’s right outside the night rebel’s base if you need to know.”
“Yes, I should send somepony down there to look at it, just to be sure he’s gone and he didn’t leave behind any nasty surprises.”
Humming, the chimera snapped his digits, the picture disappearing with a pop. “I think I’ll go take a look myself. I’ll speak to you later human.” In a swirl, Discord disappeared into himself with a flash.
“That’s one way to leave,” Anon said before turning to the princess. “Sorry if all this has troubled you.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about; it’s not your fault any of this happened.”
“I suppose,” he mumbled to himself before moving onto other things. “Now, you mentioned something about my head a bit ago. Could you tell me what you all found about it?”
“Ah, yes… that. We didn’t know for sure what we were dealing with until you told me about the cave, but it seems that Momus has done something to your head, rearranging the shapes in there, making it so you can nullify magic.”
“Shapes? Wait, nullify? I don’t know what either means.”
“Our magic is based off units of shapes and lines that we formulate in our heads, though that’s a very basic gist of things. It takes a good while to learn how to properly form it. We take the shapes and lines and make intricate works out of them which we conjure to do what we wish to happen. The more intricate and complex, the more taxing it is, but also more effective. Truly powerful spells require incantations, scriptures, or artifacts to be added, but that’s a more advanced topic.”
“Right…” Anon said, sort of getting what she said but having difficulty with it.
“There’s obviously more to magic than that, but it’s what I can explain to you at the moment. Momus had somehow rearranged the few that were developing in your head, which was forming around who you were as a being, and inserted an innumerable amount of them. It somehow changed who you are as a being when it comes to magic that is, and it’s allowing you to nullify magic entirely. It’s quite a conundrum that’s baffled everyone that’s looked at your head.
“A magic to nullify said magic is, well, contradictory to what we know. There are artifacts and even some spells, but what we’ve seen from you is a completely new branch of magic being formed. So far, all we could determine about it is that you can turn it on and off at your own will if given enough practice. We’re not sure what the boundaries are with what you have, or even what uses it may have other than the most obvious.”
“How do you know I can control this?”
“Magic, even something as bizarre as what you have, is still magic. It’s something you learn early on in magic theory. It is still magical in nature and thus can be controlled, so long as you practice at it.”
“It sure would be nice to turn off magic whenever I want, knowing that people can’t read my mind whenever they want.”
Princess Celestia frowned at him, “Anon, I can assure you that without permission we wouldn’t look into your head. There are laws in place to ensure it won’t happen.”
“That sure didn’t stop Luminesce from attempting that.”
“Did it now,” the princess said with a blank expression, terrifying Anon with how unreadable it was. “It just so happens that he’s in our custody at the moment. That was something he neglected to tell us, which will reflect poorly on him. I shall have to buff our security dealing with him, along with adding charges.”
A knock alerted the two of someone entering. The door opened with a sun guard of Celestia’s saluting the princess. “Princess, I have urgent news from Canterlot.”
“I am currently dealing with something of importance right now. Surely it’s something that can be handled by my standby?”
The guard, looking unsure of himself, walked up to the princess. Moving her head close to her guard, Princess Celestia listened to the whispered words of the guard: the more he said, the more worried she looked.
“This might be connected to Momus,” she said to herself, Anon barely catching it. “Guard, please alert Luna about my absence. She will know what to do after that.”
With a salute, the guard left the room immediately. The princess stood up regally, making her way to the door. “It looks like I must go, for now, Anon. I do hope you get better soon after all that you’ve been through. If you need anything, please have either my sister or me informed so that I may help you to the best of my abilities.”
The princess left the room, leaving him alone to think about everything he had just learned. He leaned back into his pillow, staring up at the ceiling. Hearing a door creak open soon after, Lyra, Bon Bon, Rainbow Dash, Cloud Chaser, and Vinyl walking in.
“Hey Anon,” Cloud Chaser greeted, flying beside the human as the other ponies came in. “How ya doing?”
Anon merely shrugged, “I’m feeling sore, but other than that I’m doing okay. What brings you all here?”
“We just wanted to see how you were doing,” Bon Bon said. “The others are looking around town before we all head back to Ponyville. They were told you needed rest but we just wanted to see you before we did our things.”
“It sucks how that Lumi-turd guy got the drop on you forcing you to stay at the hospital,” Dash said with a shake of her head. “We could’ve had some fun out in town here if you were fine; gosh that really sucks! But I’m certain you gave that jerk the ol’ one-two right back there. Why didn’t you tell us you knew how to kick some awesome butt?!”
Anon was perplexed at what she just said. “…What?”
Dash furrowed her brow before looking at Cloud Chaser. “We overheard some things from everypony and put two and two together. Everyone’s saying how you had an epic showdown with the guy that totally destroyed everything around you!”
“There’s also rumors going around about you taking down some night rebels as well,” Bon Bon said. “We have one from the other base in custody and he seemed terrified just hearing your name.”
“Come oooon,” Dash said, moving closer and nudging his uninjured shoulder. “Tell us about the awesome fight!”
He scratched his head, using his good arm. “I guess some context is needed. Back in college, I took up some boxing lessons as a way to keep in shape. I was never very good, but everyone insisted I keep practicing."
‘I also picked up some wrestling moves, to entertain myself mostly. Watching all those WWE Showdowns and fighting cartoons wasn’t a good idea at the time.’
“I went all out and beat down a few night rebels. As for the day rebel leader, I kind of just threw some chairs at him and ran away. Oh, but I did manage to fight him in one last showdown. Even managed a kinniku buster on him; the guy was the right size for it and everything.”
“What’s that?” Dash said, her eyes sparkling. “That sounds awesome!”
Anon coughed, not wanting to reveal it was from an old cartoon he used to watch and only replicated on mannequins.
“It’s kind of like a suplex, but you lift them above your body and tuck their head beside yours before you slam them downward.”
“That sounds so rad!” Cloud Chaser said with her own sparkling eyes.
“Yeah, but Octavia managed to wind up knocking the guy out, right before I got KO’d by Lyra— no, Lyra, I’m still not upset at you, stop that,” Anon told her, hearing her starting to whine.
“I really am sorry…”
Bon Bon patted Lyra’s shoulder before looking at all the ponies, “From what I recall, the others didn’t get there in time before Anon and I got out, being split up. Discord was the one that trashed the place ultimately. He plowed right through it all before moving onto another spot and repeating his mayhem. He didn’t even see us there.”
“Oh… Soooo I guess we were wrong then,” Cloud Chaser said, rubbing the back of her neck. The others gave her a look, which she rolled her eyes at. “Dash and I may have said some things out in town after what we heard and, well… everybody maybe, kinda, sorta believes you may have beaten up the guy singlehoofedly.”
“As well as beating down the night rebels so badly they pee themselves seeing you,” Dash added.
“Is that why I heard some rumors about Anon taking on the entire rebel group himself?” Bon Bon asked, looking at the two.
“I heard some things about him having ‘funky kung-fu powers’, among other things,” Vinyl added in.
“Just what I needed,” Anon groaned out.
“At least you look cool in the end?” Cloud Chaser said with a forced grin.
Anon simply stared at her before turning to Bon Bon. “Where were you exactly? I went back to the cell we were at to get you and only found a tied-up guard.”
“I always keep something hidden in my coat, that’s one of the reasons I like to wear it so much.”
“But how did you get out of the cell in the first place.”
“I may have tricked the guard and then blinded her…”
“Bonnie, you didn’t,” Lyra said. “I thought you weren’t going to carry that stuff around anymore!”
“Figured it might help out on our trip, and I was right.”
“What exactly are you talking about?” Anon asked, quite curious.
Bon Bon looked back at the closed door to check on it before digging into her coat pocket, pulling out…
“Oh wow! That looks like some high-grade stuff!” Dash said, flying close to her.
“It was hard acquiring it but so worth the costs.”
“Isn’t that like, illegal in several places?” Vinyl said, lifting her goggles to take a look.
“…It’s just sand,” Anon said nonplussed.
“Pocket sand,” Bon Bon corrected, “and the good stuff too! Not some regular school playground sand.”
“You should put that away before anypony gets hurt from the stuff,” Lyra said, eyeing the sand warily.
“Regardless of how Bon Bon got free, I’m just happy this is all over with and we can go home,” Anon said.
“I think the princesses wanted to keep you here for a little while longer for some reason, probably about your head?” Dash said, looking at the things hooked to him. “I hope nopony bonked it too badly.”
“Alright, so I’ll be going back in a few days then.”
“We’d all stay and keep you company, but most of us are probably going to head back since we’re needed back at Ponyville,” Dash said with a grin. “I’ve been missing out on work too often and they’re not happy about it.”
“If you didn’t sleep so often—”
“Shaaaduuuup,” Dash told Cloud Chaser, who snorted at her.
“We should probably let you rest,” Bon Bon said before turning and walking to the door. “Come on girls, let’s go find something to eat before we meet up with Princess Luna in a few hours.”
Dash and Cloud Chaser flew out the door without a word with Vinyl following close by. Bon Bon stared at Lyra who eventually turned, walking away.
“We can catch up on some things when we get back to Ponyville,” Anon told Lyra.
She turned around, staring at Anon before smiling. “Right! I still have to show you around the house!”
Returning the smile, the two exited and closed the door. His smile vanished as he laid against the pillow, once more staring at the ceiling.
‘So, I can nullify magic. That’s kinda interesting, I suppose. The rumors are going to be a pain dealing with, Momus and his plans are going to be annoying, and who knows what else will happen in the future.’
He hummed, rubbing the cast on his shoulder. His thoughts floated back to what had happened only a few short days ago, leading up to his fight with the rebel leader.
‘Maybe I was jumping to conclusions about that cartoon logic. They’re still people and I shouldn’t treat them any differently than I already had been doing. Still, everything that has happened probably could have been dealt with if I had thought about it as a cartoon. Why would that make sense though? Does the magic in their world alter them to such a degree?’
Lyra had explained how magic has a mind of its own, not thinking per se, but as it functions in a manner that still can’t be explained. Everything in this world that lives has a magical shield, like a second skin on it. Magic allows more elasticity to be forced into things, so if someone like Rainbow Dash collides with a tree at full force, she walks off with the barest of injuries. Only in direct combat does this kind of thing fail, and even then they’re still not getting the full brunt of the damage that he’d expect to see.
As a result, he had seen ponies acting almost mindlessly on what they did. So what if you fall down that ravine? So what if you get an anvil dropped on you? It’s not going to kill you.
Does magic behave in that manner forcibly, putting up all the shielding and odd phenomena that forces the world to act in accordance to a scripted animation slot, or do the ponies and other beings act willingly in that manner because magic allows such behaviors to occur due to lacking repercussions?
‘Lyra mentioned that weird dream thing of hers. What if our world was seeing a few other worlds in their dreams? Wouldn’t that mean that magic acts naturally to a cartoon?’
He barely remembered anything from how tropes worked concerning cartoons. Pinkie pulling things out of nowhere: That was… hammerspace. He remembered seeing a pony being flattened in town once, only to pop back up like an accordion. Twilight could also fit into a mad scientist trope, albeit one that is magically inclined and nerdier than what he’d expect.
‘I just need to keep an eye out then, watch and predict what happens so I can counter them. I’m clearly some kind of MacGuffin for this Momus being. Things are about to get even wilder, and I’m smack dab in the center of all this. I refuse to just sit back and not have some semblance of control.’
Anon grumbled, leaning his head back as he stared at the ceiling. “Why does everything have to be so complicated?”
“I know what can cheer you up!” Anon heard that at the foot of his bed. Looking down, he could see Crumble, now wearing a cheerleader outfit. “A snack!”
“PIIIINKIIIIEEEE!!!”
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X~ ~X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X
“What do you mean everything’s blocked off?!”
“There have been massive storm surges that popped up everywhere, making any travel rather impossible and scaring multiple countries into closing off their ports. They may have just ceased several hours ago, but they want to keep them closed, fearing a magical resurgence.”
Inkwell passed over some of the documents he had prepared, looking tired. “It seems your return back to Canterlot would be full of work, princess,” he said jokingly, something the princess huffed at. “All the sea, air, and magic ports outside our lands have been temporarily blocked until it can be assured that travel through these regions will be safe.”
“Under whose orders are these from?” the princess asked, looking through the papers.
“The griffon kingdom and the minotaur clans are in agreement with pushing this blockade for the time being, though it only appears to be a token showing of force. The hippogriffs are helping with ensuring that all sea travel is returned back to ports, for their safety they claim. And the yaks are completely closed off from everyone, though they are allowing magical ports to leave their lands, not to come in. As for our ports, the merchants are enforcing the closing of these as they do not wish to be seen as instigators to any other country, or to be blamed for anything that occurs.”
Perusing through the documents, Celestia couldn’t help but feel that Momus was responsible. It couldn’t have just been a coincidence. But for what reason?
Stopping on a page, Princess Celestia kept her face clean of any strong emotions. On the inside, she was stricken with shock, rereading the words over once more.
“The passages… they’re open…”
“Princess?”
“Guard, I need you to report to the captain that I want three dozen strong for all air and seaports to keep guard there for the time being. Hopefully, that should appease any beings there until we can assure them it’s safe to travel once more.” She then turned to her assistant, “Have Princess Cadance informed that I need her assistance in bringing crystal ponies as guards for the sea and land ports—” She stopped, sensing something in the air.
The guard does as well, stepping back and charging his horn for any unwelcome surprises. Stepping back herself, Celestia waited for the built-up magic to make itself known in the room.
A flash of blue light popped in front of her, followed by a harmonic array of tinkling that played a soft, yet energetic melody.
Just as quickly as it came, the melodies drifted off, leaving her staring at an extremely bright and colorful scroll. She caught it with her magic before it could drop, examining the intricate art engraved on it.
Unclasping the lock, she unraveled the scroll, hearing more melodic tinkling being played. Reading through it, a smile appeared on her face.
“Inkwell, I need you to first call the council together. Something just came up that needs discussion.”
“Princess, the council is, well… they’re already together and are currently waiting to talk to you.”
Rolling the scroll back up and clasping it shut, she turned to her assistant with a raised eyebrow. “And why wasn’t I informed of this?”
“As soon as things happened, they knew it would take some time for you to come back and read things over. They’ve been collecting all the information they can and having it brought to them as a way to discuss what is occurring. At least, until you were available to meet with them.”
Princess Celestia took a moment to think about what she was told. “Very well. You two have your orders.”
The guard saluted her before exiting the room. Inkwell simply bowed, following after.
Standing there, she gathered her document papers along with the ornamented scroll before teleporting outside the council chambers in a flash. The two guards outside the chamber didn’t budge from her sudden appearance, already accustomed to it happening.
They powered their horns, opening the doors for her to enter. Stepping inside, the doors slowly closed behind. The princess could see the entire council standing patiently by their chairs, waiting for her. They all gave a bow. Returning it, the council took to their chairs just as the princess sat in her seat.
“As we are all aware, there have been several disturbances around the world,” the princess started. “Many of which have stopped the travels of beings from entering and departing from our lands.”
“And quite suddenly,” the councilpony Mackerel said. “I’d have to assume that it must have been something rather large to stop all travel as it has.”
“Please tell me this can be resolved, and fast,” Sky High asked. “I’ve got Cloudsdale up in a roar with beings not being permitted to travel into griffon lands. I fear this may have hurt trades to our weather factory for their wares as well.”
A snort could be heard, “I doubt this has hurt as much as the minotaur caravans that are expected to come over in two weeks!” Merlin spat out. “They’re already considering forgoing the entire trip!”
“I thought the minotaurs were supposed to be made of sturdier minds than to allow such a thing to stop them,” the representative from Manehatten said.
Sky High narrowed his eyes at Merlin, “As it just so happens, a very important visitor that you all are already aware of, from the griffons, was visiting in Cloudsdale and is currently stuck there, worried out of her mind.”
Merlin clicked his tongue. “I suppose that may be a tad troublesome.”
Celestia spoke up, “Rest assured, the problem has already calmed down and seems to be resolved.”
“Will there be anything that can harm any of the towns near the seaports,” the representative from Baltimare asked.
Princess Celestia shook her head, “I’ve already sent out guards to every sea and airport to ease any concerns for the merchants and travelers coming in and out of our lands.”
The mare sighed, seeming to relax after hearing that. Merlin though frowned. “I noticed you disregarded any mention of my magical ports.”
“I will be needing your unicorns to take positions at the locations in these papers in a few days to search for any lingering magic’s in the air, along with providing a guard for the travelers and merchants as well,” Celestia answered, levitating over a certain pack of documents. “We’ll have your ports back up soon enough but this is of extreme importance that must be addressed immediately.”
“The porters aren’t going to like this one bit,” Merlin grumbled, taking the papers before looking through them.
“Princess, is there anything you can tell us about why all this happened?” the representative from the Crystal Kingdom asked.
“I cannot divulge the full details due to the information being dangerous in the wrong hooves, but I can say that the rebels will no longer be a problem.”
“That is great news to hear,” Mackerel said with a sigh. “Those darn ponies mucked up some of the shipments that came in a few months back, destroying all our tea and throwing it in the harbor!”
The representative of Baltimare chuckled hearing that. “I remember that particular incident. Our mayor tried saving the day by announcing the harbor drinkable. He forgot that the ocean was salty,”
The princess, along with the council, laughed remembering that. “At least it wasn’t refined salt or that might have been a really bad day,” Celestia said with a small smile.
Merlin slammed the table, making the council members jump. He looked shocked, looking at the papers before turning to Celestia. “P-Princess! This is saying that the old passageways are now cleared! How?!”
“It’s related to the storms that blockaded off the old passageways,” she answered. “Somehow, they’ve managed to also take the obstructions away, clearing them once more.”
“But those passages were blocked off by some unknown magical force for… I don’t even know how long ago it was. Surely a few hundred years, minimum! And now, they’re just… gone?”
“Are we talking about those dangerous passages that haven’t been safe for anyone outside a few daring individuals?” Sky High asked.
“I remember those Saddle Arabians being able to get through the one by them, but it took a great deal of care to manage any proper travel,” the Las Pegasus representative said. “So how do we know for certain that they’ll stay gone for good?”
“We don’t know,” Princess Celestia answered. “That is why I need Merlin’s unicorns to check out the passageways for any lingering magic that may still be around and to ensure that they are gone.” She levitated the ornamented scroll to the middle of the table where it could be seen. “We’re already getting calls from the blocked off kingdoms, wishing to reconnect to us for trade and travels once more.”
Merlin levitated the scroll over, examining it with the utmost care before unclasping it open.
“That scroll appears to be made from collected corral only available in the Ghibli Oceans,” Mackerel said with awe, staring at the scroll before turning to Celestia. “You’re not implying that the Kingdom of Ponyo has returned to us, are you? And you say they want to reconnect our trade routes?”
“That and much more,” she answered with a smile. “The storms may have caused much confusion, for some, difficulties,” she said, looking at Sky High, “but they are a blessing in disguise, reopening the passageways. I believe we can try and reform old alliances and treaties with nations and beings we haven’t been in contact with many a year.”
“A small problem with that, Princess Celestia,” a pony said, gaining the attention of everyone. It was the representative from Van Hoover: Horton Von Whoosie. “We still need representatives of our own to go to said locations, and even current ones to get do their job. While that job title hasn’t been around for a very long time, officially, I remember a certain someone that currently holds that job’s title.”
“Please tell me you’re joking,” William Wright, the representative of Ponyville spoke up. “That mare does not suit a proper ambassador that we can ensure won’t muck up the job!”
“She’s rough around the corners, but she’s trained in knowledge pertaining to the different species and cultures outside of our lands.”
“Lyra Heartstrings is a suitable candidate due to her knowledge, she’s just… lacking in proper etiquette,” Celestia added, keeping a calm demeanor.
“When we voted her in for that role, none of us thought she’d have to partake in any of its responsibilities,” Sky High said. “Can we not choose somepony else? Like your student, Twilight Sparkle?”
Princess Celestia shook her head. “She knows very little outside our own culture, being solely focused on magical studies and what I have personally taught her.”
“But she has a good judgment making skills and can easily take the time to learn for this position,” Sky High added. “All you have to do is give her a book on different cultures and away she goes!”
She shook her head once more,” I cannot have Twilight enter that position; she’s already being groomed for something else.”
“What of our current ambassador for the griffons, Haze Friction? Could he not perform this role?”
“He is currently talking to the griffons at the moment about matters concerning the weather factory, and that’s not something we can pull that stallion away from,” William Wright said, looking at Sky High.
“W-What about the ambassador for the minotaurs then?”
“You know we have to have him moving from clan to clan to do his job; replacing him would be quite difficult,” Wright said.
“I agree with Sky High,” Mackerel said, “I’m not sure Lyra is a good fit for this job. But, if we cannot have someone else work in her stead, at least get her somepony to work with that can support her, working as joint kommunelegatusionists.” The others nodded their heads with murmurs of agreement.
“There’s that mare that lives with Lyra,” Sky High said. “I believe her name was Sweetie Drops?”
“She goes by Bon Bon,” Celestia corrected.
“Doesn’t Prince Blueblood have her under his hoof?” Merlin said. “Even if she’s close to Lyra Heartstrings, why would he give up one of his top personnel?”
“I believe you’ll find her a bit more… freeing as of late,” Princess Celestia spoke. “She should have no problems with working beside her friend.”
“Our reports wrote of her working as Lyra’s assistant multiple times in the past. She’d easily fit the bill with what we need for Lyra. Her ties to the mayor in Van Hoover will surely be a great boon to us.”
“I’m certain we can convince them to go,” Merlin said, still looking through the scroll. “What of that alien? He would also be a good addition to the group.”
“I recall him being something called an ‘ecologist’, dealing with the land and how to make things better,” Horton said, rubbing his chin. “On top of him being an alien aligned with us… Yes, having him along can certainly help.”
“He’s also becoming a very well-known being that we’re associated with; many refer to him in a hero-like status regarding those rebels,” Wright added. “Some of those rumors I’ve heard are quite fascinating! That alone would be reason enough to have him along.”
The rest of the group started adding in their thoughts to the discussion as Princess Celestia sat there, taking it all in. She would eventually make her final decision when everything died down, but for now, she could find no reason not to have the beings in question as joint ambassadors, being quite happy with their choices.
As she sat there in her seat, her thoughts slowly drifted to Momus, thinking about what his plans may be.
‘This is likely all connected, knowing the unblocking of the passages had to have been his work. Maybe Momus meant for Anon to leave eventually to these other places. It might be a good idea to have someone tagging along with them and help keep an eye on him, just to be safe. It’s too bad I can’t add Twilight; she certainly would be a good addition to this.’
Thinking on Twilight, she mentally sighed, remembering that pony’s previous actions concerning the human. She had some regrets punishing her as she did.
‘Twilight must have learned her lesson by now surely. I could give her a simple test, just to be sure, before I give her the book like I planned.’
Giving herself a small nod, she went back to listening to the group talking about the joint ventures and the unblocked passageways on top of the different beings they would soon be dealing with once more.
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X~ ~X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X
It had been a few hours since Anon had talked to everyone in the room. After the nurse heard him and removed the despicable cookie, he didn’t have much else to do other than rest.
The nurse returned soon and explained a few things to him, such as how he had been in the room for a few days. It worried him he was out of it for so long until the nurse explained it was due to the herbs they used.
Princess Luna had also come by, telling him about some things that certainly did not please him in the least. They’re going to have some ponies trying to help him learn how to control his ability. It was mostly so that he could know how to turn it off and control the output on what he could do; it would be bad if everything magical around him just suddenly stopped working. It was easy to understand why they’d want that under control, with a world filled to the brim in magical works.
Hearing a knock at the door, he lifted his head and saw a nurse walking in along with Princess Luna and one of her guards.
“Did something come up?” Anon asked as the nurse lifted his bed, getting him into a sitting position.
“We’re going to get you to the chariots and have you flown out of here and back to Ponyville where you can rest there.”
“I thought that I was supposed to stay here for a little longer.”
“Plans changed; they want to start immediately on helping you with your problems along with other things that need addressing.”
The nurse walked over, placing some clothes down along with a pair of shoes before walking to his bandaged arm and removing it from its holdings. She placed a sling by the bed, showing Anon how to put it on.
“I hope nothing is going on that’s pushing me to go back to Ponyville so soon,” Anon said, grabbing a shirt with his good arm. He groaned, realizing Rarity made it and that it had quite a few gems on it. “Why are there gaudy gems on this?”
“That’s some thank you for the clothes,” he heard coming from the door. Pulling the shirt over his head and carefully down his body, he could see Rarity staring at him with a pout. “I figured you’d like to try some of the smaller gems I managed to gather for your clothing.”
“I prefer wearing things that can’t potentially poke me in the chest or other body parts,” he said as the nurse helped him put the shirt on over the cast before also helping with the sling.
“The shirt and clothing are prototypes for something I was working on with the minotaurs,” Rarity said, before letting out a sigh. “It’s hard marketing to those beings, so I figured maybe if some of them saw it on you…”
“I get where this is going,” Anon said, grabbing his pants and spotting the gems lined down the legs.
‘She wants something to market to those beings. Kind of like selling toys to kids. They just need some kind of ‘action-figure’ feature to make them work.’
“Why don’t you just make some tight-fitting clothing for them that’s hard to rip? From what I hear of minotaurs, they like to show off their bodies, so having clothing that they have to forcibly rip off could appeal to some of them.”
Rarity blinked, mulling the idea around. “That sounds like an interesting idea. I could add in a few interwoven bind and stretch threads and it might just take off.”
“So not to sound rude,” Anon said, still examining the pants for anything that could hurt him, “but why are you here? Shouldn’t you be gallivanting off with the rest of Sparky Spark and the Nutty Bunch?”
“Don’t like my company nowadays? How’s that for friendship…” Rarity harrumphed before walking a little way into the room. “Everypony is going back with you to Ponyville. I came here to give you some clothes and to see you before you left.”
“You’re not coming along?”
Rarity turned her head away, scrunching her nose. “I, um… I’ve got things I need to do here before I leave…”
“Oookay then,” he said, grabbing his underwear and pants.
‘Her words didn’t sound ominous, so I doubt it’s going to affect me. Probably some side gag I’ll see later on.’
“Can I have some privacy now?”
“What for, Anon?” the princess asked. Anon nearly forgot she was there, what with her simply sitting there and staring at him putting his shirt on.
“Reasons…”
“And what reasons are those?” Luna asked.
The nurse walked in, whispering something to the princess’s ear. She raised an eyebrow, to where Rarity also walked up to her and whispered something.
Luna looked at him with a blush, “I forgot all about that, hahaha…. I’ll just go.”
He sighed as the others left in giggles, closing the door behind them.
Getting his clothes on, carefully working around his arm being in a cast, he felt better with clothing on. It may have gems on it, but they looked identical to all the other clothes he had been wearing. Every single day he had been there in pony land.
‘Oh. That’s another trope, isn’t it? Wearing the same thing over and over. Well, ain’t that a kicker.’
Walking out, he could see Rarity had already left, the princess and her guard still there along with the nurse, who checked over him one last time before going into the room he vacated.
Princess Luna coughed out, “We should get going. I will bring you to the chariots that will be taking you all back to Ponyville before resuming my current duties here.”
“You’re also not coming back?” he asked as they walked down the hall together.
She shook her head, “I still have much that needs to be done down here with my guards, such as combing through the bases and outposts for anything that may still be there.”
“Ah, okay. And why can’t I take the train I was told about instead of the chariot?”
The two of them walked out of the building, shielding their eyes from the bright sun. It felt like early afternoon to Anon. “You don’t want to take a train with the condition your arm is in, especially one full of ponies.”
Anon was confused, “I don’t see myself being reckless with my arm cast as it is,” he said, walking down the street with the princess.
“You’ve never been on a train full of ponies, have you?”
“Can’t say I have.”
“Then trust me when I say it’s not something you should be doing with that cast on.”
He simply shrugged at that. Following Luna, they eventually arrived at an open field filled with chariots and ponies standing around them.
“That’s a lot of chariots just to get a few ponies here.”
“They transported the guards that will be watching over the rebel prisoners, along with additional guards for the town.”
“Ah,” Anon said. “And with the chariots now empty and needing to be returned anyways, transporting us with them takes care of things pretty well.”
“Exactly.”
“ANON!”
Turning where he heard his name screamed, he could see Lyra running up to him with Bon Bon trailing behind. Upon arriving, she stopped directly in front of him before jumping up to his stomach, hugging him. Or at least trying to, right before the princess caught her in a spell, stopping her midair.
Luna frowned at the mare, which Lyra sheepishly smiled before letting out a squeak, being placed on the ground. “You do realize you could have injured his arm even more than it is?”
“But hugs can help the healing process!”
“Be as it may, I doubt magical hugs will be working on him in the near future.”
“Wait, hugs can heal here?”
Neither party said anything to that. Princess Luna dropped Lyra down, walking over to a chariot, motioning Anon to come over. “We need to be sure this will work in the first place, so please get in and hold on.”
“Anon’s coming too!” Lyra said before squealing. “This is so great. We all get to go home at the same time!”
“Come on, Lyra,” Bon Bon said, walking beside her, “we need to get into our chariots.”
Nodding, the two went away with a skip. Anon chuckled, shaking his head at them. Returning to the princess, he did as he was told getting into the carriage and holding his seat. Two pegasus ponies in front put on their harnesses and stood at attention, ready for liftoff.
“First up in the air will be Anon’s chariot,” Princess Luna spoke out loud to everyone. “Hopefully, his magic nullification will not affect the pegasi carrying his load. Everypony else will follow him afterward in a v-shaped formation! You all already know what needs to be done after arriving at Ponyville. Now, raise it out!”
The ponies attached to his chariot looked unsure of themselves hearing that as they started to flap their wings. Running in a straight line, they took off into the air with Anon holding on for dear life.
Resisting the urge to scream, he saw that the ponies were, in fact, capable of lifting him into the air with no problems. It still made him queasy being so high in the air and without anything to properly secure him to the chariot, such as a seatbelt.
‘Why aren’t those on these chariots yet? I already made up the schematics and everything.’
It took what felt like an hour of excruciating riding to get to Ponyville. They landed right in the park where Anon was first abducted, making things slightly ironic for him.
‘Or was that coincidental? I blame Alanis for confusing an entire generation on that word.’
Upon landing to a full stop, Anon wobbled out of the carriage, falling to the ground on his side. Luckily he didn’t fall on his injured arm.
“Would you like us to deliver you to the hospital?” a guard asked.
“No… right here is good,” Anon answered back just as the chariots started landing around him.
He could see a pony jump out of their chariot just as it landed, flying over to him. “Dude, are you alright?” Rainbow Dash asked, flying above him.
“Yeah, just don’t feel very comfortable riding those things.”
Dash snickered, “You should get used to it if y—” The pegasus poked him in the side, which immediately shut her up. Her wings went flaccid as she dropped to the ground, landing beside him in a squeak.
“…Heh.”
The other ponies walked up to them, staring at Dash in amusement. “We already told you what might happen if you touched him, Dash,” Twilight said flatly.
“Y-Yeah, yeah,” she said, flapping her wings a few times. “I’m going to head home now and get a hot shower before getting some sleep.”
“I, um, also need to go now and check up on my animals,” Fluttershy said as Dash flew off. “We’ll see you when you’re feeling better, Anon.”
“Come on, Anon,” Bon Bon said, at first going to help lift him when remembering what had just happened to Dash. “We should get back home.”
“Awww, I wanted to set up a party for our return!” Pinkie said, bouncing beside her.
“Maybe some other time, but right now I’m pretty certain we can all use some rest after all we’ve been through.”
“Before everyone goes,” Anon said, sitting up on the ground, “I’d just like to say thanks for everything.”
“You’re a friend of ours and we help our friend’s in need,” Twilight said, gaining nods from the rest of the ponies.
“Well, thanks anyway.” Anon looked around, noticing something amiss. “Where’s Vinyl and Octavia?”
“They stayed back for some reason,” Cloud Chaser said, flying by Anon. “Not sure exactly why though.”
“Maybe Octavia is getting Vinyl to purchase her a new cello before they leave?” Flitter mentioned.
“Maybe, they were at the marketplace,” Cloud Chaser said. “Well, time to go for us two. You take care Anon, we’ll see you soon.” And just like that, the two flew off, headed back to their home.
The other ponies said their goodbyes as Anon, Lyra, and Bon Bon walked back to their home in Ponyville.
“This was some crazy adventure,” Bon Bon said, shivering from the cold wind passing by. “I’m glad we’re finally back just before the snow was scheduled to fall.”
“That’s right, the pegasi around here make the snow fall don’t they?” Anon asked.
“Yep, and it’s going to be deep when it hits,” Lyra answered.
“The town’s pretty dead right now,” Anon mentioned, seeing not many of the stalls were open. The ones that were seemed surprised seeing him back, giving him a friendly wave before immediately closing their stalls and leaving.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if some of them were waiting on word for when you got back,” Lyra said, looking at an empty stall. “Many of the ponies here were worried and upset when they found out you were taken.”
“Really?”
“Yep! I won’t be shocked to hear a party is being planned for tomorrow on your return home!”
It didn’t take long for the three of them to reach their newly made home. Anon was surprised by how strikingly different it looked in comparison to before.
“I never got to show you around the place!’ Lyra said, jumping in front of him. “I can’t wait to show you your new room!”
Anon chuckled, scratching his chin. “I hope there’s something to shave this hair off me as well.”
“You could always go to the barbershop for that, Anon,” Bon Bon said, walking toward the door.
“I could try and cut it for him!”
“Your magic wouldn’t work, Lyra. And besides, you’d likely mess it up somehow.”
“Would not!”
Watching the two talking back and forth, it made Anon feel relieved to have something that felt relatively normal in this world, which was saying a lot.
Hopefully, he could get some peace for a little while until something new popped up that pulled him back into more of this crazy world. He knew the thing with Momus wasn’t over. The event back with the rebels didn’t feel very climactic for him.
Whoever Momus had his sights on, Anon knew that being would come out with some fanfare in the future. Anon had to make plans for the upcoming future and prepare for what was in store for him.
~End Chapter Twenty~