//------------------------------//
// Going to the Gala 
// Story: No, I Am Not A Brony, Get Me Outta Equestria! 
// by BronyWriter 
//------------------------------//

It is time. Or it will be shortly, at the very least.

I am currently standing in Carousel Boutique, hoping that I can drop the current pose that I am in so I can take a little lunch break before we head off to Canterlot. Currently, Rarity is adjusting my tuxedo for the Gala itself, something that she has been doing for a few hours now; frankly, I'm starting to get a little impatient about it. She's worse than my dad and a camera – seriously, that man has to take a dozen pictures before he gets one he likes – and I'm getting a little sore just standing here. "Are you almost done?" I ask.

Rarity gives a slight harrumph and maneuvers a few more pins around the jacket. "I probably would be if you weren't so oddly proportioned. Do your legs really have to be so long?"

"Yes, yes they do," I respond.

Rarity rolls her eyes at me and measures my arm for the 50th time. "I'm almost done, darling, so you'll just have to be patient for a little while longer."

"Our train leaves in five hours. You'd better be done by then."

"Oh ha ha." she mock laughs dryly.

"Seriously, though, when--"

"All finished!" she announces.

I breathe a sigh of relief and Rarity uses her magic to remove my jacket. I jump off of the stool that she's been having me stand on and go to change back to my normal work clothes before she changes her mind and says that she needs to adjust the length of my pants a few millimeters or something like that. Once I'm changed, I sling my bag over my shoulder and walk back to Rarity's workroom. She is adjusting something or other on the jacket. I fold the shirt and pants and place them back on the stool.

Frankly I'm not so sure why she's making such a big deal out of my tuxedo. I don't really care about looking nice at the Gala tomorrow. If everything goes super perfectly, I'm not coming back to Ponyville – Celestia will just send me back to Earth from there, these ponies will go back to being fictional, and I'll go back to being a normal human in a normal human world.

Of course I'm aware that nothing ever goes that perfectly. But hey, a man can dream, can't he?

I see that Rarity is in 'the zone', but I clear my throat a bit to get her attention anyway.

"What do I owe you for the tuxedo?"

"Oh, nothing at all, darling," she says with a wave of her hoof. "I made my friends their Gala dresses last year for no charge."

"Uh, wouldn't that mean you lost a decent amount of money on materials and such?"

Rarity shakes her head with a small smile. "With the fashion show I put on and the backing of Hoity Toity, I more than made up for my losses with commissions from the publicity."

"I see."

I stretch out before checking the bag to see if I put my lunch in there like I originally planned. Good, I have; No need to go back to my house to get it. I say goodbye to Rarity and walk out the door towards the Everfree Forest. Normally I wouldn't go there, what with the locals' tales of how dangerous it is and all, but I was walking by one day and I noticed a clearing that wasn't too far in; A perfect place to have a meal alone without the risk of intrusion by a nosy pony or the like. Suffice to say, I need an hour to myself every day, and these ponies don't help.

In about fifteen minutes, I reach the clearing with every intention of relaxing for an hour or so. However, when I reach the place, I find that somebody else apparently had the same idea. A pink, hyperactive somebody, as a matter of fact. It's one of the strangest sights I have seen during my time in Ponyville: Pinkie Pie reclining on a rock eating a sandwich.

Much to my surprise, it looks like it isn't loaded with sugar like everything else she eats all the time. It looks like a decently healthy sandwich, to be honest. Not only that, but I've never seen her so... calm.

She looks relaxed.

Well, Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie means I'm not observing her for more than a few seconds before she notices. When she sees me, she sits up and flashes me a smile like she always does; However, true to her current demeanor, it's more reserved than the normal smiles. "Hey, TD," she says. Gosh, even her voice is less squeaky.

"Uh, hi," I say. "What'cha doing?"

"Oh, just relaxing for a bit during my lunch break."

"Gotcha," I respond.

The clearing is dead silent until I ask the question that has been burning in my mind. "Is something wrong? You seem a bit more reserved than normal."

Pinkie Pie lets out a quiet little giggle and turns to face me. "Nothing's wrong," she reassures me. "I'm just here to recharge a bit. You see, I come here every so often to be alone for an hour or two; It helps me stay focused and energized for the day."

"Really?"

"Yep," she nods. "Don't get me wrong, I love being around other ponies making them smile is something I adore, but do you know how much energy that takes? A pony can burn out very quickly if they're not properly rested. That's why I take a few hours out of every day to be alone for a while; It helps me organize my thoughts a little and just be me, Pinkie Pie. It can get tiring to be around other ponies all the time. If I can be alone for a bit, then I can be the happy Pinkie Pie that the ponies around here know and love."

"So, is the overly hyper and random personality an act to make other ponies smile?" I ask.

Pinkie shakes her head. "No, that's still the real me. If I was being fake around other ponies, then my element wouldn't work very well, would it?” She giggles a bit at her own joke. “Besides, ponies like me for being me, and I want to give them the most genuine version of me that I can. It's just that, to support that part of me, I need some alone time every now and then."

"I get that,” I admit. “I came here for pretty much the same reason."

Pinkie's eyes widen, and she's quick to put her sandwich back down on the paper bag she brought it in. "Well I can go find somewhere else to eat if you want to--"

I cut her off with a wave of my hand and a shake of my head. "No need, I'll just go home to eat. You were here first, and even if this was my rightful spot, I wouldn't kick you out."

She smiles gently and picks her sandwich up again. "Thanks, TD."

"Don't mention it."

I notice that an uncomfortable look crosses Pinkie Pie's face. "Something wrong?" I ask.

She sighs and looks down at the ground. "I just...I dunno..."

"You can tell me if you want," I say.

Pinkie sighs again, but she makes eye contact this time. "TD, I'm just worried that you're still mad at me for when I set you on fire, like you don't really know how sorry I am for crossing that line."

Ah, this again. "Well, you did buy me a house,” I say with a snicker, “and you send me hayless 'I'm super-duper sorry' cupcakes every week, so–"

"But I'm worried that you don't see that as me saying that I'm really super-duper sorry! I'm worried that you see that as me trying to make myself feel better. You know how some ponies – humans too, I guess –, sometimes they say that they're sorry so that they feel better about themselves instead of making the other person feel better!" Her voice doesn't waver, but I feel like she's fighting back tears.

I lean back on a tree, stunned for real. "Yeah, I get that," I finally respond. "And to be honest, yeah, I was probably mad at you for longer than I should have been."

Pinkie's ears flatten and she looks dejectedly at the ground once more. "I know you were mad at me for that and I deserve it, but I didn't want you to be mad at me when I did it," she whimpers.

"Well, nobody likes it when somebody is mad at them."

"But what I did was very wrong!” She almost yells as she looks back up. “I was only thinking about how it would only hurt you physically and I forgot to think that even thinking you're on fire is a really scary thing. Besides, you didn't know what a Pinkie Promise is or how sacred they are!” Then, her eyes shoot back down to the dirt. “I guess I should have realized that you wouldn't understand that right from the start just because you'd seen a few episodes of the show before getting here..."

"You know about that?"

Pinkie manages a smile at this. "Twilight told me.”

"Ah."

"She told all five of us, actually, but she made us Pinkie Promise not to spread it around town until she talked to the Princess and figured out what to do with what you told her and the foals."

I nod. "Good."

"But that aside," she resumes. "I shouldn't have assumed that you'd understand how serious a Pinkie Promise is."

"Well, it's not like I'm completely clean on that, either," I say. "A promise is a promise, even if it isn't a Pinkie Promise. I still shouldn't have skipped it like that. So yeah, I'm sorry for that too."

Pinkie's smile returns at the apology part. "Aw, thanks TD, but I've already forgiven you for that. We all make mistakes."

"Yeah, guess we do."

As both of us mull over what to say, there's no sound to speak of. It is Pinkie that breaks it. "TD?"

"Yeah?"

"I... well, I know that the only reason you agreed to go to the Gala is because you want to see if Princess Celestia can send you home, so I just want to tell you that... Well, if she can send you home and we don't get a chance to see each other before she does, then I want you to know that it was super-duper awesome getting to know you, even if we had some rocky parts in our friendship."

I grow a smile of my own. "Thanks, Pinkie, thanks."

"I do have one question, though."

"Shoot."

"If Princess Celestia can't send you home, what would you think about that?"

I let out a sigh and begin rubbing my temples. "Pinkie, before I answer that, I want you to know that I don't hate any of you anymore. Maybe Celestia, but if she does send me home, then I'll forgive her because she did right by me in the end. But I want to make it perfectly clear that getting back to Earth is my number one priority. I'd choose Earth over even the best life I could ever have here any time.

“When it comes down to it, I don't belong here. I can't have a family, I can't relate culturally to anyone and the last thing I want is to die before going back. Whatever happens here, I know that I belong on Earth with the rest of humanity.

“Don't take that personally, but... you know," I finish awkwardly. Even with the sugarcoat, those are harsh words.

Pinkie takes a deep breath, then she nods. "I understand."

Neither of us says anything for a moment.

"Well, I guess I'll let you have your alone time, then,” I say. “I'll see you at five for the trip to Canterlot."

"See you then," she waves.

I wave back and turn around to go back to my house, but I don't make it more than a few steps before Pinkie Pie stops me once again. "I hope you don't think I mean to be rude by wanting some alone time. I don't want you to get the wrong idea about this: you're my friend and I like spending time with you."

I shake my head once more, amusedly this time. “I thought we'd cleared that out already, Pinkie: I have no problem with someone wanting their alone time." I reassure the little pony. "Like I said, I get the need to be alone for a while myself. You go ahead and hang out here, and I'll see you later."

"Thanks TD, you're a real pal," she says.

As I walk back to my house for lunch, I reflect on the rather unique experience I've just had.


* * * *


The rest of the day goes by pretty quickly. Once I finished my lunch I began packing for the few days we'll spend in Canterlot, making sure to pack everything I have from home – pretty much just the laptop and the scooter now that my cellphone is a donated asset to Twilight's research, as well as a few changes of clothes and my toothbrush. I've always packed pretty light.

It doesn't take long before I'm ready to go with the crew to set up this Gala. From what I've gleaned during my interactions with them, they've got some pretty elaborate stuff planned. Come 4:00PM, I head out for Twilight's house, where the seven of us have agreed to meet beforehand to get everything settled. We'll be talking a lot on the train about what we're going to do, but just from the preliminary stuff that I've heard, I know I'm just going to be a helping hand. I'm going to be drafted by Rarity the most for sure, but Pinkie Pie might get me to help too.

At any rate, I arrive at Twilight's tree house about five minutes later. I knock on the door, greeted after a few seconds by the unicorn herself, and let in. The other five are already there as well, chatting away excitedly about this and that. I walk over to them and sit down on the floor.

"Okay, now that we're all here, let's go over everything," Twilight commands. "The train leaves in forty-five minutes, so let's make sure that everyone is all packed and ready to go."

"I'm ready," I say, pointing to the satchel currently slung over my shoulder. The other five give their confirmations as well.

"Good," Twilight says as she jots something down on a piece of parchment. "I still have a few things left to pack before I'm ready, but it shouldn't take me more than ten minutes. Once I'm ready, we'll be off to the train station!"

"Sounds good to me," Applejack nods. I copy the gesture, while the other five start up their excited chatter once again, I lean back a bit on the floor.

As I look around Twilight's library, I see a trash can nearby with what looks like several dozen letters overflowing out of it. Normally I don't snoop around, but knowing Twilight, it might be something mildly amusing. Besides, I have nothing else to do right now; I don't really have the knowledge to contribute to the conversations the others are having.

The first letter is, to say the least, interesting.

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I shadowed Cheerilee's class where TD was lecturing and, long story short, I found out that we are an entertainment show in his world. I don't know how that's possible, but I kind of want to question him a little more about it.

The letter ends here. I imagine Twilight didn't like what she had written thus far.

I sigh and put the letter back in the trash can. Apparently she didn't take the news as well as it seemed; Maybe I should question her on it later. Right now, I'm going to let her focus on organizing the Gala. No need to exacerbate an existential crisis right in the middle of one of the biggest events of the year.

At any rate, Twilight takes another five minutes, then the seven of us, plus Spike, are off to the train station.

As the six of us are walking, I turn to Pinkie Pie. "Hey, Pinkie, how long is the train ride to Canterlot anyway?"

"As long or short as it needs to be," she replies simply.

Wait... What?

She giggles a bit, noting my confusion. "I think it'll be about four or five hours on this line."

"Gotcha."

Shortly after I receive that bit of bizarre information, we arrive at the station. The place is so packed with ponies of all colors and sizes, I have difficulty in keeping track of where we're going. Thankfully, Twilight leads us towards the proper line. Somehow I've been drafted as Rarity's official luggage carrier: I'm carrying so many bags and suitcases, I swear a Navy SEAL would flinch in sympathy. They're all pretty light, which makes me wonder what the heck she has in them anyway.

It takes about a half hour before we actually get everything loaded onto the train, thanks to Rarity feeling the need to take the contents of her whole house for the trip. I silently thank the Lord that I pack light enough that the other six members of our party aren't irritated with how long it takes me to load everything. It's not like my baggage is an issue; I can just carry my pack on the train at any rate.

Our ride pulls out of the station at 5:45 PM – trust trains in Ponyville to be late like that. It's not like Earth trains don't leave late sometimes, unless they're in a society run by a fascist dictatorship... which means I'm not sure why the trains here don't run on time. Huh.

The eight of us have all settled in a private train car at this point, paid for by Celestia as far as I know, and the chat swerves back to the preparations. From what the others have been telling me so far, Applejack is in charge of the buffet, Fluttershy of bird choirs and music in general, Rarity will take care of decorations and somehow Pinkie Pie got put in charge of entertainment, games and such. Based on what they've told me about the Gala last time, I'm not entirely sure that it will go over so well, what with the main attendees being snobby, rich socialites – gee, I can't wait to interact with them –, but I keep quiet. They're having too much of a blast for me to feel good about being a party pooper.

Finally, Twilight and Spike are the managers, the people in charge of making sure everything runs smoothly. Celestia would do it herself, they say, but being the sun goddess of all of Equestria means that she's too busy for it.

That tidbit makes me doubt that I'll have too much time to talk to her beforehand, if any at all. However, this does not dissuade me from my goal. I will talk to Celestia and I will get her to tell me if she can send me home or not. I don't really care if it's dangerous at this point; I'm willing to risk whatever I have to, to get home. I just hope that she can confirm my theory about reversing my translocation, because... In truth, it's all that is keeping me going by now.

The six ponies and dragon chatter excitedly about their plans while pouring over diagrams that Twilight, in her perpetual perfectionism, has drawn out to organize everything. The conversation doesn't really interest me, so as I tune them out, I stretch out with a yawn before leaning back on my slightly too small seat on the train. I don't know why I'm tired all of a sudden, but now seems as good a time as any for a short nap.

With a few adjustments to make myself more comfortable, I lean my head against a nearby window and let the sandman take hold.