Good guy Ralph Bergson was at his home when suddenly, something happens.

He gets strangled to death. He gets sent to Equestria, as a Celedon. Will he put his new talents to good use?

(!WARNING! This is a Displaced+Power Lotto fic, and the ponies are humanized. If that is not your cup of tea, I must kindly request that you avoid commenting negatively, unless you read the story to provide criticism. Deleting of comments will not take place unless there is a double-post or nothing but mindless swearing. Thank you and have a wonderful day!) (Comments contain spoilers)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
FEATURED ON 06/29/2015!
AND AGAIN ON 07/01/2015! YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!

This story did not explode! What a relief and/or letdown.

Part of OPERATION CRACKFIC STORM 2024 ( group | stories ).

Thanks to Silk Rose for coming up with the idea, writing chapters 22 and 9, and developing the code; thanks also to Meadowsys for general code help.

Thanks to IrradiatedPirateBooty ( tumblr ) for the awesome character art.

And thanks to everyone in the comments who stuck around for the final countdown!

Anon makes prosthetics, but despite the words of others, he isn't happy with them.

Just a little short story I made while working on another fic. Not sure if I'll do more, but if there's enough interest, I have a few ideas for where to go with it.

Edit: This was initially intended to be a short story where it ended after the first chap, but I've since added more at the request of commenters. I plan to continue adding chaps, but I guarantee nothing. Let me know what you think.

Jason has been in Equestria for quite some time and has lived countless lives. Some have been short, others have been rather long. No matter the length, they all share one thing in common. They all end in fire and flames.

He has spent centuries wandering the countryside, gravitating towards events. When whispered words of Nightmare Moon's return reach his ears, his feet take him to Canterlot, where what he encounters leaves himself and many others more than intrigued.

An idea that sparked a story. Immortality is an often used plot device with a Human In Equestria story, and I wanted something different, something new, something... fresh. Thus, the concept of mimicking the phoenix came to life, and from it, this story.

I've done a lot of things I ain't too proud of. I've worked for an organized crime family as a hit man for more time than I'd like to admit. I got paid to take people's lives, I've robbed, stolen, smuggled and hijacked. If it's something one would call sneaky, crooked, vile or anything like that, I've done it.

My name is Vincenzo Scungilli and this is the story of my new beginning. Tired of a life full of nothing but murder and blood, I decided That I wanted to get out of the mob. With a "blessing" from my don, I found that it would prove wise to escape my past and the people who still want me dead not by leaving New York City or even the country, but by my newly discovered mode of transport, inter dimensional travel. By complete freak accident, I ended up getting sucked into Equestria, a land of friendship, magic and candy colored talking ponies who proceed to annoy the hell out of me...and I gotta wait a week to get back.

Think I can keep my sanity and maybe even learn a few things about friendship? Will I even go so far as to make friends with these fruity little wimps and risk life and limb to help them when they accepted me and took me in as their friend? Will I find out who I can really trust and learn who I can't? Well then ya'd better start readin' if ya know what's good for ya! Capiche?

Rated Teen for violence, language and explosions involving "F-bombs"
Cover Art Courtesy of thelunarqueen.deviantart.com

They tell me my memories are fake. They tell me my life isn't real. That I'm nothing more than a science experiment gone wrong. I can't accept that. I won't accept that. They trapped me in some sort of cell, where they study me. I will escape from here and find a way home. I am Jake Darrison, and I WILL find a way back to my family. Nothing will stop me, not these horses, not any magical monsters, NOTHING. I will be free.

Anon was rather surprised to wake up in a world of magical talking horses. He was even more surprised to discover that said horses already knew him from a TV show.

Inspired by some old prompts in the RGRE thread. Cover art by Nignogs.

Seven years. For seven years she was neglected. In that time, she was underpowered, defeated by a nag in the moon, defeated by an evil bug roach, a victim to tentacle vines, defeated again by the same evil bug roach as before, as well as many other slights and insults in between.

All she wanted was one episode of her own, one to show her glorious personality in all of its radiant glory. Unfortunately, it was not to be. Her impressive record as the longest living and serving monarch (now diarch, lots of love to dear, dear Little Luna), brokering peace and prosperity the likes of which no other nation could hold a candle to! Or a sun, for that matter.

Time to do something about that.

One day Celestia finds herself being asked out on a date by TD, a human famous for punching her in the face.

You know what to expect.
......
Or not.
I REGRET NOTHING

Set in a Universe where TD did not go on his Journey.
Intended to be a non-canon side story.

If you want to understand this story better, you'll want to read No, I'm Not A Brony. GET ME OUTTA EQUESTRIA!!!.

Big shout outs to BronyWriter who wrote the original story and is the editer of this one.

As it turns out, our planet is the afterlife of a tiny horse world, and my house is super haunted. At least the ghosts are kinda cute, if not a teensy bit annoying.

Cover Art by dstears (slightly edited by me)