Breaking Breakfast
“Enjoying your breakfast TD?” Cadance asked the human sitting opposite to her on the ridiculously long dining table. TD nodded while taking another spoonful of cereal. Despite her distractingly garish appearance, TD and Cadance were getting along surprisingly well. Cadance took interest in human culture, while TD loved how it wasn’t Twilight Sparkle levels of obsessive, or any kind of obsessive for that matter.
"I never thought cereal could ever taste so amazing,” TD said after he gulped another mouth full. “Though I can’t help but get the feeling it tastes familiar. What’s it made of?”
“Oh nothing special,” she said while grabbing the cereal box and showing off its back contents as if she was in a TV commercial. “Except all the essential ingredients needed for a properly nutritious meal.”
TD wanted to raise an eyebrow at that but decided against it. He was too hungry to care about anything but his meal.
Just then, a paler than usual Blueblood lumbered into the dining hall, his mane and tail surprisingly unkempt, his eyes bloodshot, and his teeth yet to be brushed. In his less than spectacular state of mind, he sat right next to the non-brony, not even noticing his presence. He did however, notice the pink alicorn sitting in front of him.
“Oh Cadance,” he said in a tired, yet miffed voice. “I thought I told Auntie Tia to ban you from entering the castle.”
Cadance rolled her eyes. “You do know Aunt Celestia won’t do everything you tell her to do, right?”
Blueblood narrowed his eyes slightly. “The only reason I did that was because you embarrassed me in front of everypony in the Canterlot Garden Party.”
Cadance smacked the table with her hooves as memories she wasn’t very fond of began resurfacing in her head. “Embarrass you?! You were the one who decided to court me in front of Shining Armor!”
“Shining Armor…” Blueblood groaned. “I can’t stand to think of that scum. I’d rather spend my valuable time thinking about that nightmare I had last night where I shared wine with TD Harrison Powell.”
TD stopped pouring milk into his fifth bowl and stared at Blueblood, very much disturbed. “Um… what?”
Blueblood’s eyes shot open and he turned his head in the human’s direction so fast, his neck almost fractured. He proceeded to fall of his chair while squealing like a little girl. “What is he doing here?! The likes of him should be denied entry on Canterlot soil!”
“TD is a guest in our castle,” Cadance said with a scowl. “He doesn’t need to be harassed by a spoiled brat like you.”
Blueblood returned her scowl. “Save your lies for somepony who would believe you. What gives him the right, staying in my castle, sitting in my seat, eating my Hay Bits?”
TD silently ate and watched from the side lines, not bothering to speak due to his lack of energy. But as Blueblood used the words ‘Eating’ and ‘Hay’ in the same sentence, he paused, and his eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. He grabbed the Cereal box to check the brand. Sure enough, the words “HAY BITS” were printed in big red letters. To add salt to the wound, above the brand was a picture of Cadance smiling and winking at him.
TD began to hyperventilate. “Uh… Cadance?”
Cadance kept her eyes locked on Blueblood, who kept his eyes locked on her. “Don’t worry TD,” she said in a determined voice, not aware of what was happening to the non-brony. “I got this.”
He tried to speak again but couldn’t find the strength to utter a word. As his head fell on the dining tables, he mouthed something inaudible. If one could read lips, he/she would know he said.
“I hate alicorns.”
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Luna and I walked through the hallway of the castle to the dining room. The night guards had ended their shifts, and it was an hour before the day guards replaced their posts, so the hallway was empty. Luna had dried her tears and was back to her original self, if a little down. Yet our roles were reversed as I was the one who was keeping an eye on my sister.
“How are you feeling, Luna?” I asked in motherly voice.
She sniffled, but cracked a smile “We are faring better, sister. Thank you for asking.”
“Well good,” I said with a nod. “You know, if keeping me in check was that difficult Luna, you could have told me sooner.”
Luna shook her head “We would not dream of disappointing our beloved sister. Thy pain is our pain. We would never let personal gripes come in the way of making sure thou remained safe and sound.”
“Thank you Luna.” I wrapped a wing around her as we walked “I really appreciate your help. And now that Cadance is here, we can finally breathe a sigh of--”
I was interrupted by what sounded like a heated argument. We quickened our pace and it was apparent that the two voices belonged to Cadance and…
“Blueblood…” I almost hissed “I swear to Faust, the only thing that can set off my temper more than that colt is if somepony fed TD hay.”
We reached the dining hall and as I gazed through the door frame, I had the sudden urge to slap myself in the face to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. Blueblood and Cadance were quarrelling among themselves like school yard fillies while TD was lying with his head on the table unconscious with a box of Hay Bits next to him.
Horrified, I levitated the box close to my face. Thank Faust, it only contained a minute amount of the advertised product. I would have breathed a sigh of relief if the atmosphere wasn’t so chaotic.
“BLUEBLOOD!” I roared, earning their attention.
He squeaked in fear. He should have been afraid. “Aunti--”
I practically slammed a hoof in his mouth to silence him. “No, I’ve had enough of your insolence for one day.” I pointed towards TD. “TD is suffering from an allergic reaction from the Hay Bits. Get him to the infirmary and give him an allergy shot.”
He gasped as if he were offended. “Why should I--?“
I brought my face close to his until it was only an inch apart. “Finish that sentence, Blueblood. See what happens.”
He nodded reluctantly and levitated TD’s unconscious body out the door. As he did so I turned my attention to Cadance, who smiled awkwardly with an audible squeak.
“Ehehehe… Oops?”
Luna coudn’t decide whether she should facehoof or shake her head. So she did both.
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Aww c'mon! Perfect opportunity to troll Bluey, lobbed right over the plate, and TD let it go by.
Well Cadence will had to apologies a lot now, what surprise me is that Cadence is taking this rather calm, she just intoxicated someone and all she has to say is oops?
>HAY BITS
oh shit son
>He gasped as if he were offended. “Why should I--?“
For the love of all that's holy, Blue...
rs1ci.memecdn.com/78/2210078.gif
You do not argue with your ruler.
oh poor TD
Hay hay T.D. what's wrong.
Well. This story is quite interesting, keep up on the good work author.
On a side note can express that I feel quite sad? I just spent about an hour typing down the theory I had in my head over all the events that happen in this story surrounding him dealing with the love poison and the love hex and intended to post as one of those cockamame theories that get proven wrong immediately by the author, or later down the line through the new chapters posted. However, half way through the text I accidentally refreshed the page and (*gasp!*
) lost everything that I had typed out.
Well. C'est la vie I guess.
4934203 Poisoned, not intoxicated.
4936303 Well I'm sorry about what happened to you. Happened to me once too while I was writing the chapter, so I can relate to that. As for the theory, damn, you devoted one hour for my fanficfic? I'm honored!
4936652
Oh sorry poison him and can only say ooops?
Nice try Cadance, but it takes more then that to assassinate TD
4936303 I'm curious what's the jist of the theory? I have several endings planned for the story but can't decide which one should I pick. Might as well see what other people have in mind.
Well, I guess the best way to explain the theory is that Celestia shot herself in the hoof.
The theory was that the love themed things (though I guess in this case it's really just outlining the love poison) thus far haven't actually had any effect on him. We haven't really had much evidence that he was altered by the poison bar the sudden departure from ponyville and his sudden asking of a date with Celestia, and seeing how the only other organic that had contact with the air-based love poison was a plant that died not too long after, we don't really have any way of knowing how it affects something beyond sudden death.
The poison itself hasn't acted in the way that we would expect to be normal for the poison (no immediate obsession with the first person he sees, no obvious obsessiveness displayed, nothing.), the only person that seems to have been/be obsessed is Celestia and if anything I'd say TD's actions were almost long time planned considering the mental note Celestia makes when she finds out that he got tickets to a theatre that as she says, "even a princess would need to pull more than a few strings to get". Any explanation we get from TD is vague, but his actions made me think this was far more planned than a sudden "got hopped up on love poison and then a day later makes the perfect date with an ageless being".
I'm starting to kind of ramble, but really the theory just boils down to "The poison didn't actually have any effect on TD, so really Celestia just shot herself down with the whole thing"
4996336 25.media.tumblr.com/c9f6d6792f40c06218b9946127be220f/tumblr_mq6dovRsrt1rm00dso1_500.gif
4999914 Er, thanks for the clap? Is this a sarcasm clap or a genuine one? Honestly it's a bit hard for me to tell when the Joker is the one doing the clapping.
5000653 Exactly
5001900 Hm, have any other suitably ambiguous gestures meant to confound the person it's directed at?
5002552
media.tumblr.com/c68e71f0b93fdebc2a172c372543c64e/tumblr_inline_ms42fhJkJ01qz4rgp.gif
5002620 Well. I asked, and I certainly received...pudding.
Lol Cadence's reaction to TD
Why Celestia doesn't just strip Blueblood of his title, wealth and lands (if he had any) is beyond me. If I were Celestia, that's what I would do.
Celestia: 'And don't come back until you learn to have some compassion and appreciation for the common pony, dear nephew!'
“Finish that sentence, Blueblood. See what happens.”
A more polite way of saying "f*ck around and find out".