I Mean, Tell Me What You Think?
It’s an absolutely beautiful, temperate day in Equestria. So naturally, you’re spending your day the best way possible. Inside, with your amazing marefriend. You lay on your couch, chilling out with Berry Punch. You’re comfy. She’s comfy. You can feel her warm, soft breath just lightly heating up your shirt. The gentle scent of her perfume fills your nostrils. Her skin feels velvety soft under your fingertips. In that moment, you know, that without a doubt that you are safe. You are loved.
“Anon…. Why aren’t there cheesey poofs?” Berry asks.
You look down to Berry, who lays against your chest. Then there, literally 2 feet from her on the table, is a fucking barrel of cheese puffs. Like they’re right there.
“Dude, they’re right there,” you say. “Why don’t you just get some.”
“But it’s so faaaarrrrr,”she groans. “Why aren’t they in my mouth. Like, right now.”
You reach an arm out to reach for the barrel of cheese puffs, but, to your surprise, you can’t reach it either. Probably because there is a pony on top of you, restricting your mobility.
“Do betterrrr,” she teases.
“I’m doing my best.”
“It’s not good enough. Do better!”
“Fuck,” you moan. You lay limply on the couch. “ I give up. I am the dead. You get them.”
“No you.”
“I did it last time.”
“But you did it so good and looked so pretty doing it.”
“But, like, you’re on top of me.”
Berry looks to you, then to herself. Then to you.
“Carry me,” she says proudly. “Worship me for I am the queen of the cheese-”
You dump her off your body and she falls to the floor with a thud and a light yip. You easily reach out to grab the cheese puff and then cuddle up close to them.
“And now I am the Cheese King. Long May he reign.”
“Wow,” Berry says, standing up on her hooves. “See, if you gave me the cheese puffs, I was going to get you whiskey, but noooooo.”
Immediately you hold the barrel of cheese puffs to be taken like you would see in Shindler’s Stable.
“I will hand my cheesy crown to a more fitting ruler for a scotch, neat.”
Berry smiles and leans down to you.
“I believe we can make this a peaceful transfer of power.”
She plants her lips on yours, and you press deeper into her sweet, delicate kiss.
She breaks away, and moves to the kitchen.
“Are we disgusting?” you call out to her.
“The worst, why?”
“I dunno,” you say. “I just, like. Like it. I’m really happy with us. We just… work.”
Berry smiles and leans in the doorway.
“I love you too, doofus.”
“Oh, dude,” you say. “Did you hear about Dusk and Rarity?”
“No,” Berry said. “Aren’t they basically miserable? But trying not to show it?”
“Well, it got a lot harder to hide. Rarity is forcing Dusk to quit his job and stay home.”
“Jeez,” Berry said walking back into the room with a tray holding two glasses and a bottle of scotch. She sets it down before going on. “Yeah, Like, three months at best, honestly.”
“Actually they’re engaged now.”
Berry visibly shivers.
“Man, that’s not cool. It’s just… so much unhealthy. Like, all of the unhealthy,” she says.
“That’s the world for ya, today. It makes you take a step back and appreciate the little things so much more, you know? Seeing something like that. Something so extreme.”
“Yeah, but like, still. It sucks that it’s happening at all. Like, if I could, I wish everyone would be able to have something as wonderful as we have.”
“Me too,” you say. “But I mean, cloning doesn’t exist, so I think I’mma keep you.”
“Oh! Fair stallion!” Berry says in a faux voice. “Such things aren’t decent to be said in public. What would the ponies say?”
“Let them talk!” you declare. “I fear not the critical eye of the causal passerby. I only need YOU!”
“You’re weird. Stop.”
“I SHALL NEVER CEASE.”
“Stop or no alcohol.”
Your tone instantly gets soft and borderline hurt.
“I’ll be good I swear. Don’t take away the scotch please.”
Berry giggles and pours two doubles of scotch for both of you. You take a glass from her and take a nice sip.
“Scotch and cheese puffs. I see nothing wrong with this picture,” Berry snickers.
“Yeah, because I’m classy and…”
“I’m not a bottle of scotch?” Berry interjects. “You had one job. Try again.”
“I’m peaty sure I’m the scotch.”
“Okay, sure. I’ll let you think that,” Berry says, winking at you. Now move. I want to keep cuddling.”
“Okay, okay.” you groan, setting the scotch back on the table. “Come here.”
Berry curls herself back onto your chest. You wrap your arms around her and pull her close, feeling her body heat mesh with yours. The scent of your mane sending your mind into spirals. She adjusts her ear just right to be right over your heart, and you can her delicate hum when she hears the calming sound of your heartbeat.
“Anon, we have a problem,” Berry says.
“What?” you ask, genuinely concerned for a second. “Is everything okay?”
“No,” she says. “We messed up?”
“We did? How?”
A short pause fills the air as Berry tilts her head up to you. Her eyes meet with yours, in that moment, you feel a connection unlike any other. Like life found a certain symbiosis with paradise itself, and for one moment, blessed you with some semblance of eternal bliss.
“Anon, the cheese poofs are still so far away…”
You remain silent. She pouts out her lower lip.
“Congradulations,” you whisper. “You played yourself.”
“Anon, make it betterrrr.”
“How do you want me to make it better?”
“MAke it bettterrrrr!”
You crane your neck closer to her and plant a kiss on the top of her head. The pouty lip disappears and instead is replaced with a beaming smile.
“Is that better?” you ask.
“Yeah,” Berry says with a wide smile. “Everything is wonderful now.”
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Um.
*Carefully edges out the door*
Y'all are shitting me if you think this challenge is lasting 24 hours.
S'cute and simple
Well I mean... it's not like Anon fics were ever especially subtle... Have an up facing thumb.
9436083
They are only 8 hours from being done. So...
This story made me gay.
this gave me flashbacks to my ex girlfriend. good times. have a like.
9436098
Goddamnit, Tony!
The only RGRE story I like. Very sweet. C:
Healthy RGRE is blasphemy.
Dude. With the minorest of tweaks this could be an entry in CategoricalGrant’s contest. Just saying.
This is the cutest of things and I love it.
Lol
This is just comfyness and cute bundled up together in a thousand words of supposedly RGRE. Well, have an upvote, it's still cute as heck.
I want a relationship like that
As for the story, I liked it.
Nice "slice of life"
I wouldn't mind reading more.
The Monk
"Knowledge is power and power corrupts, so study and be evil." - Reykan
This was nice read.
9437015
Totally agree, but it's not just the 20s, it went well past that, to people born in the 40s. Men and women just grew up with that in the home, it was culturally acceptable. Just look at the stuff trump has said, sexual harassment claims against people like charlie rose, ect. Hearing my 60 y/o mother talk about my grandfathers and other men she's dealt with, western culture has shifted dramatically in under 100 years.
9436396
People are actually triggered by this comment?
rofl
9437015
No. It's not about being young. It is in fact about them being over the top. Even for these "old times" you speak of some of the things the characters say and do are grossly exaggerated. Some of the actions authors write don't like up with what you're speaking of.
And that's on top of it turning character we know into horrible caricatures of themselves all for a male fantasy in which a bunch of females want the
self-insertOC/Anon for no reason other than because he has a dick. No matter how bland or a complete unlikable dick the author presents them as. RGRE is used as an excuse for having the characters lust after a character.9437077 How about leaving politics out of the comments section, k?
Pretty instead of peaty?
9437015
For one, this whole post comes off as preachy and patronizing. Secondly, most of us are fully aware of how things were 'back in the day', even if we've not experienced it we've got a really good idea of what it was, so acting as if we've never considered that things once were this way is a little silly.
But yes, it is honestly over the top. Almost all of these RGRE stories are based on the idea of "Reversed roles of modern-day Western Society, except in Equestria". And things just aren't... aren't like this anymore. You have so many, so very many stories where mares are nothing but bluster and swagger and stallions are a piece of meat. For any women reading this who think 'yeah that's how it is here' - no, no it honestly is not. The way RGRE presents it is that the ones who are doing this are the absolute norm. Anyone not following this is the strange and possibly shunned minority.
Any stallion who is remotely capable or competent is some kind of freak and the norm is to be incredibly frail and emotional. Mares are HAPPY to be the ones to work their asses off to provide for stallions. That hasn't been the general case for a very long time.
These aren't reversed gender roles. These are reversed gender stereotypes - which are, themselves, outdated to anyone with half a brain and eyes to see with. This story is comedic in nature and doesn't really go into these problems with this new RGRE subgenre, but the title brings it up.
good job yoU PLAYED YOURSHELF LOLOLOLOL
Edit: about 2 seconds after I posted this I realized I should fall asleep tbh
This seems fine, but I like the over the top stories.
9437236
Ill delete it.
if you saw patronizing, you misread it and its intent.
9437149
I can't speak for the general RGRE audience, as I've read only a few stories in this current fad, but I disagree with this statement. I'm going to use myself as an example here. I wrote a story not too long ago, not a good one mind you, called The Little Things, in which I write Anon and Celestia together in a reverse gender role society. Not over the top, not used as a way for Celestia to lust over Anon, but as a backdrop for both why Anon finds himself not fitting in as he once did in his world, and as a way to subtly shift characters interactions, because gender differences in reality aren't as cut and dry as many would assume. Which is me assuming what they assume, but I'm throwing that out there, because I find this sort of debate rather silly. In that, the arguments tend to get rather silly.
(Which I'm now part of the silly, since I just typed this).
Edit: Though, if I'm really being honest here, I wrote that story cause I wanted to see Anon be the little spoon to Celestia, cause I'm a goofus. But I do believe that RGRE can be written well with effort, like most everything else, and that it's up to personal taste whether it's something you want to read or not. I don't think any amount of complaining, without a solid backbone of reasoning, is gonna change a lot of the sub-genres' audience opinion any time soon.
Plus, you know, separate the author from the work. I'll use Vladimir Nabokov as an example here. He wrote a story called Lolita, which is about a pedophile. I do not think he is a pedophile, as there is no evidence to say that he was, other than accusations because he wrote a story about one. You can write anything and not believe a word in it, but do so because you wanted to explore a concept. I'm sure the same applies to RGRE writers, in that they know how ludicrous some of the stuff they churn out is, but they find it fun to explore, and or get a chuckle out of. I don't think it's that harmful.
(Boy, howdy, did that go away from the quotation above to a general little spiel on RGRE real quick).
Anywho, I'd like to hear feedback on this, since I think it should be discussed, just not in this comment section so much, since that'd be a bit rude for the author, considering it'd delve away from the story itself.
XD This was cute.
Honestly, I expect RGRE to go the same direction as the Conversion Bureau.
Second person perspective, nor tagged as such.
Could not read...
Finally a good tongue-in-cheek deconstruction of the RGRE cancer.
Also:
Causal passerby... would that be Dr. Hooves?
9437597
RGRE didn't have an original seed story, did it? It sort of congealed as noticing a trope. So the particular way CB worked out would be unlikely to reoccur.
9437188
We're you by chance meaning to reply to someone else? No part of my comment touches on politics, it was just a passing comment on culture, which usually plays a big role in these rgre fics.
Alright, while I despise RGRE fics in general, I really enjoyed how wholesome and cute this one was. Glad to see some deconstructions of that AU beginning to emerge.
Dusk
You forgot to slap "Second person" tag on this fic.
This was nice, very wholesome.
When I first learned what the RGRE was, I thought it was like this, where it was just flipped. Not where it was flipped, turned inside out, and multiplied by 10.
9437213
nope. its a pun.
That . . . was adorable!
9437843
Gotcha, wasn't sure if it was intentional.
9437188 How about you go fuck yourself and let people do what they want. Fuck off.
I take it this was inspired by a manga with the... kinda same basic idea?
MrNumbers is crying.
I mean the story isn't bad. It's decent. Though the healthy gender roles stuff seems underplayed.
9437947
I think the point is that a rgre story without conflict or exageration is not nearly as interesting. If Mr. Numbers had his way, this is how boring they would all be...
9437110
Well, if you forget this thing called satire exists, it is something you wouldn't want to see.
9436098
I'm sorry, I don't get it. Humor me, and explain to the clueless idiot please?
9437236
Now I'm kinda curious as to what was said. But only a little, since it seems like the kind of thing that'd just piss me off.
Ya but overall, not a bad little thing. Nice to see people take the whole RGRE thing and play around with it.
9438577
I prefer the exaggerated roles simply because I can read a story and maintain a sense of humor
9438672
this